Archive - 11769

January 13th

Tyler Durden's picture

Schrenker Gimmicks Put Bernie the Ponzasaur to Shame





As the media whirlwind over the latest Ponzmaster becomes more and more acute, the disclosures about his past keep mounting to a point where what Madoff has done in comparison will likely soon seem tame.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

GM: If Our Cars Keep Sucking, Suckers Keep Paying





According to GM COO Fritz Henderson, if the worst case scenario that the company has put together which calls for 10.5 million annual car sales (which is higher than recent market data shows for an annualized run-rate around 10 million), then the company will simply have to

 

Tyler Durden's picture

GM: If Our Cars Keep Sucking, Suckers Keep Paying





According to GM COO Fritz Henderson, if the worst case scenario that the company has put together which calls for 10.5 million annual car sales (which is higher than recent market data shows for an annualized run-rate around 10 million), then the company will simply have to

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Breaking News: This is Your New Morgan Stanley Smith Barney Broker Calling





Summary as disclosed in C press release:

  • More than 20,000 high-quality financial advisors;
  • $1.7 trillion in client assets;
  • $14.9 billion in pro-forma combined revenues;
  • $2.8 billion in pro-forma combined pre-tax profit;
  • 6.8 million client households globally – with a strong presence in the critically important
  • high-net-worth client segment; and,
  • A footprint of more than 1,000 offices around the globe.

Lead -> Gold

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Nortel Upping The Suspense To Fever Pitch





Our readers at Reuters picked up today where we left off yesterday, and apparently had more luck in getting through to someone at the company than just the switchboard...However, not much information was gleaned: "It is our policy to not co

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Nortel Upping The Suspense To Fever Pitch





Our readers at Reuters picked up today where we left off yesterday, and apparently had more luck in getting through to someone at the company than just the switchboard...However, not much information was gleaned: "It is our policy to not

 

Tyler Durden's picture

HeidelbergCement Trying to Avoid The Cement Shoes





HeidelbergCement, the world leader in aggregate production which over the past year has lost over 60% of its equity value, and one of the main holdings of recently deceased Adolf Merckle who got caught shorting Volkswagen (for a brief period of time the wo

 

Tyler Durden's picture

HeidelbergCement Trying to Avoid The Cement Shoes





HeidelbergCement, the world leader in aggregate production which over the past year has lost over 60% of its equity value, and one of the main holdings of recently deceased Adolf Merckle who got caught shorting Volkswagen (for a brief period of time the w

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Breaking News: WSJ Reports Citi on Way to Dismantle Itself





Whoa, busy day for breaking news

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Zimbabwe Raised to AAA+ by S&P, Geithner Celebrates Thru Innocent Mistakes





To celebrate their new credit rating, insane dictator Robert Mugabe releases new 50 billion note, which is roughly equal to one US dollar.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Zimbabwe Raised to AAA+ by S&P, Geithner Celebrates Thru Innocent Mistakes





To celebrate their new credit rating, insane dictator Robert Mugabe releases new 50 billion note, which is roughly equal to one US dollar.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

4 out of 5 Vultures Agree Excrement About to Go Nuclear





As much as I hate to break it to Larry Kudlow and his unending "Ted-Spread is Down" monolog, the outlook for 2009 as per some people who actually know the business, although granted are heavily axed on the apocalypse bidside, is so bad, we should all just be buying rahmen noodles, crank radios, a

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Hey S&P, Not Too Late To Hit Recall





*U.S. DEC. BUDGET DEFICIT AT $83.6 BILLION ON HIGHER SPENDING
*U.S. BUDGET GAP IN FISCAL 1ST-QTR SOARS TO RECORD $485.2 BLN
*U.S. DECEMBER BUDGET GAP IN LINE WITH FORECAST FOR $83 BLN
*U.S. DECEMBER SPENDING RISES 41% TO $321 BLN, TREASURY SAYS
*U.S. DECEMBER REVENUE FALLS 14% TO $238 BLN, TREASURY SAYS
*U.S. DEC. DEFICIT COMPARES WITH $48.3 BLN SURPLUS YEAR EARLIER

Or maybe this merits an upgrade in S&P's view?

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Former NYT Editor To Control Car Industry





In an article today, Bloomberg picks up on a theme that we commented on yesterday regarding Steve Rattner's imminent appointment to the throne of all things auto.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Former NYT Editor To Control Car Industry





In an article today, Bloomberg picks up on a theme that we commented on yesterday regarding Steve Rattner's imminent appointment to the throne of all things auto.

 
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