Archive - Jan 2009 - Story
January 12th
Quick Robin, to the Mad-Mobile, so We Can Escape with the Mad-Plane
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 18:10 -0500
Because we all know the old man has an escape plan up his sleeve, that may very well include a top secret Mad-Cave somewhere deep inside 133 East 64th street (if anyone has blueprints for the house, please send to us), Zerohedge is very curious to find out where exactly Bernie's Legacy 600 is pa
Quick Robin, to the Mad-Mobile, so We Can Escape with the Mad-Plane
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 18:10 -0500
Because we all know the old man has an escape plan up his sleeve, that may very well include a top secret Mad-Cave somewhere deep inside 133 East 64th street (if anyone has blueprints for the house, please send to us), Zerohedge is very curious to find out where exactly Bernie's Legacy 600 is parke
S&P Pretending Like Its Opinion Still Matters
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:45 -0500
One can say many things about the ratings agencies, one could be bribed and even say one good thing, but recently S&P has decided to get really proactive to have some ammo ahead of the inevitable congressional hearings (Moody's has Buffet in its back pocket so smooth sailing over there).
S&P Pretending Like Its Opinion Still Matters
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:45 -0500
One can say many things about the ratings agencies, one could be bribed and even say one good thing, but recently S&P has decided to get really proactive to have some ammo ahead of the inevitable congressional hearings (Moody's has Buffet in its back pocket so smooth sailing over there).
Bernie Forced To Find More Creative Ways to Launder Assets
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:10 -0500BN 12:09 *BERNARD MADOFF STAYS FREE, MAGISTRATE JUDGE RULES
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*MADOFF IS CHARGED WITH SECURITIES FRAUD IN $50 BLN PONZI SCHEME
*MADOFF HAS BEEN UNDER HOUSE ARREST, GUARD, ELECTRONIC MONITOR
*MADOFF'S ATTORNEY SAID TRANSFER WAS AN `INNOCENT' MISTAKE'
*FEDERAL PROSECUTORS SAID BERNARD MADOFF IGNORED COURT RULING
Dead Men Walking in South Beach
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 16:54 -0500
In what is the greatest annual boondoggle in the hedge fund community, the JP Morgan South Beach Conference, this year held February 2-4 in the Loews Hotel, one should be able to spot some very good leading trends of the credit markets for this year.
Dead Men Walking in South Beach
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 16:54 -0500
In what is the greatest annual boondoggle in the hedge fund community, the JP Morgan South Beach Conference, this year held February 2-4 in the Loews Hotel, one should be able to spot some very good leading trends of the credit markets for this year.
Show me the mo' money
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 16:27 -0500BN 11:25 *OBAMA ASKS BUSH TO NOTIFY CONGRESS OF INTENT TO SEEK TARP FUNDS
speaks for itself
I've got a stomachful of Xanax. I took what was left of a bottle. It might have been too much.
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 14:22 -0500
You can't make this shit up. All you Hollywood agents scouring under the skirts of Daily Grill waitresses for your next script look no further (I will merely accept a firm virtual handshake and advance rights for my upcoming book), and all you employed sales people, here is a brilliant idea for how to bring your career to new heights...
I've got a stomachful of Xanax. I took what was left of a bottle. It might have been too much.
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 14:22 -0500
You can't make this shit up. All you Hollywood agents scouring under the skirts of Daily Grill waitresses for your next script look no further (I will merely accept a firm virtual handshake and advance rights for my upcoming book), and all you employed sales people, here is a brilliant idea for how to bring your career to new heights...
Count Vikula Mid-Term Grade in Accounting Alchemy: A+
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 02:17 -0500
In the latest round of government-mediated financial synesthesia, Citi is parting with its brokerage crown jewel and making it seems like a sweet deal for investors, tax payers (also investors), and the three or four other people who care about the mass insanity that occurs in present day capit
Count Vikula Mid-Term Grade in Accounting Alchemy: A+
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 02:17 -0500
In the latest round of government-mediated financial synesthesia, Citi is parting with its brokerage crown jewel and making it seems like a sweet deal for investors, tax payers (also investors), and the three or four other people who care about the mass insanity that occurs in present day capital
January 11th
Ackman and Burkle Agree to Disagree over America's Illiteracy Trends
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/11/2009 23:00 -0500
Even as Barnes and Noble posts a scary -7.7% comp store number for the "holiday" period, two major holders play hot potato with a big chunk of the retailer's equity.
Titanium Looking Kinda Rusty Too
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/11/2009 22:22 -0500People suffering from a morbid obsession with titanium dioxide and its principal producer, Tronox Inc., are frantically clicking refresh on Pacer to see the moment the company files for Chapter 11 in Southern District of NY on this cold evening. Reuters cites sources that the filing should come any moment.
Steel Partners in Need of Serious Rust Removal
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/11/2009 18:41 -0500
Steel Partners, the fund of activist investor and up-to-now wunderkind manager Warren Lichtenstein, has fallen for some tough times.
