Ben Bernanke

Indeed.

Watch live the first of two official monetary policy testimonies by Ben Bernanke, today being before Congress, and thus Ron Paul, tomorrow before the Senate. Among the critical items to be discussed are the role of fiscal policy, whether there will be QE3, and how (and when) the Fed will proceed with future rate hikes. Mostly, it is expected be a whole lot of hot air. Full text of the report can be read here. The reason everything is surging is because, as predicted, the Chairsatan appears to have just ushered in QE3: "The possibility remains that the recent economic weakness may prove more persistent than expected and that deflationary risks might reemerge, implying a need for additional policy support. The Federal Reserve remains prepared to respond should economic developments indicate that an adjustment of monetary policy would be appropriate."

Considering the only soundbite that was relevant from Ben Bernanke's 45 minute 2:15pm oratory was that "we don't have a precise read on why this slower pace of growth is persisting" America, and the entire civilized world, could have done just as well without it. Instead, we should have listened to Jim Grant, who once again correctly identifies all the things that the Fed chairman should have said (Bernanke certainly focused on the other side): "What we are not going to get is a concession that QE2 has achieved its unintended consequences, namely a lower dollar exchange rate, a higher gold price meaning weaker confidence in the dollar, slower economic growth and a higher measured rate of inflation. Those are some of the things that have come out of this experiment and let us call it by its name money printing...How do we know that this 30% gain in the Russell and 20% gain in Dow since the Chairman spoke in August, how are we to know these are real values. The prices are up, but are people who are buying these stocks on the back of the Fed, are they doing something wise from an investment point of view, and if the market is too high because the Fed has put it there, what does the Fed do when the market comes down, which opens the fate for QE3." And on a far more important topic which we will soon hear much more of, namely extensive US money market exposure in Europe, which will be completely locked up if, pardon, when there is a major liquidity run in Europe snagging American money market liquidity: "The money market mutual funds have nothing to do in this country cause rates are zero, go to Europe. So money market mutual funds investors are taking quite ponderable risks for about a 0% return, these funds are yielding a few basis points only. But to get those few basis point, these funds are crossing the Atlantic right smack dab in the middle of the European banking crisis. This is a prime example of the unintended consequences of this massive intervention by our central bank." Indeed, this is just one simple example of the massive clusterfuck, which certainly does not need Greece's $5 billion notional in CDS, to make the Lehman liquidity freeze seems like a little melting ice cube. And since everyone now agrees that Greece will default, and it is only a matter of time, all the trillions in dollars in the shadow and open banking systems that we have been exposing for years now, will suddenly be locked up in the forms of 1 and 0 in computers belonging to institutions that are no longer operational. And most unfortunately, the man in charge of it all, has a quivering lip problem.

As noted in the title, for all those who wish to reread how Bernanke justifies the fact that he has no idea why the economy will improve, but it just will, damn it, here it is, complete with the full Q&A.

Every regulator in the universe will be present at Senate Banking Committee hearing discussing Dodd-Frank (Do-nk) Monitoring Systemic Risk and Promoting Financial Stability. Which means there will be nobody to greenlight a margin hike for at least 2-3 hours, as supposedly even Blackberries are not allowed. Which means crude may even lift a few offers before today's take down brings it to $80 by EOD courtesy of Obama's E*trade account.

Each day the general population gets at least one dose of teleprompter humor. So for a bit of variety, courtesy of William Banzai, we bring you some teleporter tragicomedy (which also explains so very much...)

A game of 20 questions with the Fed Chairman...

Today, the world has replaced Messrs.. Cleese, Chapman, Palin, Gilliam, Idle and Jones with a new ‘Flying Circus’. Their names are, for the most part, equally well-known and, sadly, becoming ever-more identified with high comedy as they try to convince the world that the dollar is, actually, in rude health. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you ‘Ben Bernanke’s Flying Circus’ - starring Ben Bernanke, Timothy Geithner, Janet Yellen, Bill Dudley, Charles Plosser, Richard Fisher & featuring Barack Obama.

Goldman's Jan Hatzius, who whether he likes it or not, is probably the biggest variable as to whether there will be a QE3 or not, as every other Wall Street "strategist" immediately parrots what Hatzius says will happen (in no small part due to Hatzius' close relationship with NY Fed's Bill Dudley) has just released a hypothetical Q&A session in which he provides what potential answers to questions during Bernanke's first ever scheduled press conference on April 26 of this year might look like.  In order to keep the dodecatuple reverse psychology mystery to a maximum, Hatzius also provides what Goldman's answers would look like pari passu with those of the Fed (which is not all than ironic: after all the Fed gets its teleprompted lines straight from the corner offices at 200 West). So for all forensic linguist/economist/psychologists who are hoping to get an extra ounce of informational clarity on the future of monetization post June 30, here it is. Good luck.

“There is no room for a king or guardian or President to replace Banksta power.”

Ben Bernanke, who is expected to appear before the Senate for his biannual Humphrey Hawkins presentation any second, has just released his latest Monetary Policy Report to the Congress. Some of the highlights from the report: i) Bernanke says longer-term inflation expectations will remain stable, and risk of deflation has become negligible; ii) The Fed has tools needed to withdraw stimulus, and reiterates rates will remain low for extended period; iii) A sustained oil price rise would be a threat to growth, price stability, particularly if it unmoors inflation expectations; iv) The recent rise in commodity prices likely will lead to only temporary and modest increase in US inflation; The live CSPAN webcast can be watched here.

Dear Ben: I don’t know if you read ZH. I bet you do. It would be disappointing to learn that you didn’t read some of the leading edge financial blogs. But if not, I bet at least one of your staffers does. If you’re any kind of manager, they won’t be afraid to bring this to your attention. Or perhaps Ron Paul’s staffers can shoot a copy over to your office. It’s a simple petition, really, in the traditional sense. I hope you will consider it. I understand the conclusion you came to in 2008 and early 2009 after a career spent studying the Great Depression, and I also understand that you feel justified in using whatever channels are available to you as proxy helicopters to drop cash. And it works. You’ve essentially manipulated the US and world markets as though they were remote control funny-cars, bent to whatever short-term route you desire, though we have yet to see what the second and third-order effects are. I mean, beyond food riots, destabilization of the Middle East, gas prices that American citizens won’t ultimately be able to afford, agriculture prices that will play havoc with corporate margins and retail food prices, the US dollar losing its reserve-currency status… things like that.

Bernanke tells the public and Congress that the reason we need low interest rates is to support housing prices. He doesn’t mention that $188 TRILLION of the $223 TRILLION in notional value of derivatives sitting on the Big Banks’ balance sheets is related to interest rates. Yes, $188 TRILLION. That’s thirteen times the US’s entire GDP and nearly four times WORLD GDP. If even 4% of this money is “at risk” and 10% of that 4% goes wrong, you’ve wiped out ALL of the equity at the top five bank

The lies come hot and heavy:

• Initial claims for unemployment insurance have generally been trending
  down, and indicators of job openings and firms' hiring plans have
  improved
• QE 'Effective at easing financial conditions'
• Recovery likely to be 'more rapid' in 2011 than 2010
• 'Overall inflation remains quite low'
• Recovery in consumer, business spending may be solid
• Economy seems to have strengthened in recent months

But here's the only one that matters:

• Unemployment, inflation likely to defy Fed mandate

Which mandate is that Genocide Ben: would that be the mandate to kill off half the world with your revolutionary policies before the Russell hits 36,000?

"To rebalance debt loads and re-equitize financial institutions that should have known better, central banks and policymakers are taking money from one class of asset holders and giving it to another. A low or negative real interest rate for an “extended period of time” is the most devilish of all policy tools. And the asset class holder that it affects, or better yet, “infects,” is the small saver and institutions such as insurance companies and pension funds that hold long-term fixed income assets. It is anyone who holds bonds with coupons that cannot keep up with inflation or the depositor in a local bank who cumulatively holds trillions of dollars in time deposits that don’t earn a real rate of interest. This is the framework that has been created by modern-day policymakers who have innovated far beyond their biblical counterparts. To put it bluntly, they are robbing savers and taking money surreptitiously from longer-term asset holders who are incorrectly measuring future inflation." - Bill Gross