Cohen

Tyler Durden's picture

2014 Year In Review (Part 2): Will 2015 Be The Year It All Comes Tumbling Down?





Despite the authorities' best efforts to keep everything orderly, we know how this global Game of Geopolitical Tetris ends: "Players lose a typical game of Tetris when they can no longer keep up with the increasing speed, and the Tetriminos stack up to the top of the playing field. This is commonly referred to as topping out."

"I’m tired of being outraged!"

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Frontrunning: December 16





  • Ruble Sinks to 80 a Dollar Defying Surprise Russia Rate Increase (BBG)
  • Oil slumps near $59 for first time since 2009 on oversupply (Reuters)
  • Oil sinks, Russian moves fail to quell nerves (Reuters)
  • Fed Seen Looking Past Low Inflation to Drop ‘Considerable Time (BBG)
  • Students Among Dead as Pakistan Gunmen Kill 126 at Army School (BBG)
  • Repsol to buy Talisman Energy for $13 billion (Reuters)
  • Indonesia’s Rupiah Erases Decline After Central Bank Intervenes (BBG)
  • Anti-Islam Rally Grows as Immigrant Backlash Hits Europe (BBG)
  • Saudi Arabia is playing chicken with its oil (Reuters)
 
Tyler Durden's picture

Is Insider Trading Legal Following Appeals Court Tossing Out Two Hedge Fund Convictions





In a stunning rebuke of Preet Bharara's insider-trading prosecutions record, Businessweek reports a federal appeals court overturned and threw out the guilty verdicts of two hedge fund managers, Todd Newman and Anthony Chiasson, ruling jury instructions tainted their verdicts and imperiling other cases brought in his multiyear probe. In a 28-page decision that could rewrite the course of insider trading law, sharply curtailing its boundaries, the United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit in Manhattan tossed out the case on technicalities which could also lead to the release of SAC's Michael Steinberg - Bharara's signature prosecution - as Steinberg's lawyer remarked, "it sends a loud and clear message that the government will be rebuked when it tries to turn innocent conduct into a crime." So insider-trading is legal now... with the right lawyer and judge. We wonder how many shipments of Picassos to the three appeals court judges did the verdict cost Steve Cohen?

 
Tyler Durden's picture

"More Scarecrows Than People": A Tragic Preview Of Japan's Terminal Collapse





A few weeks ago it was revealed that the mystery person behind the latest bout of monetary (if not so much fiscal) insanity in Japan is none other than Paul Krugman, a fact which has since assured the fate of Japan as a failed state: the demographically imploding country now has at best a few years (if not less) before it implodes into a hyperinflationary supernova. And for a very graphic, and tragic, preview of Japan's endgame - the direct result of following Keynesian and monetarist policies to a tee - we go to the AP, which looks at the village of Nagoro, located "deep in the rugged mountains of southern Japan once was home to hundreds of families" and finds that now, only 35 people remain, outnumbered three-to-one by scarecrows that Tsukimi Ayano crafted to help fill the days and replace neighbors who died or moved away. This and nothing more, is what all of Japan has to look forward to as it slowly (or very rapidly) fades away to nothing.

 
Tyler Durden's picture

How The World's Most Leveraged Hedge Fund Got Away With Insider Trading





"... Shortly after returning from a trip in late 2009, Farmer erased electronic notes, in Microsoft Word format, that were stored on thumb drives, Zip drives and a shared drive at Citadel, agents wrote in a summary of one of the interviews with him. Farmer also threw away his handwritten notes because that was his normal practice and because they were incriminating, agents wrote. Farmer got rid of e-mails as well, according to their summary. “This,” they wrote, “wiped the slate clean."

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Putin Warns Of Risk Of Major Conflict, Says Dollar Losing Reserve Currency Status





Having been relatively quiet for a while, Russia's leader Vladimir, speaking in Sochi (following meetings with Middle East crown princes who confirmed Russia as a key partner - "isolated"?), has unleashed his most aggressive statements with regard the failing world order: PUTIN SAYS U.S. DOLLAR LOSING TRUST AS RESERVE CURRENCY, WORLD WITHOUT RULES IS POSSIBILITY; ANARCHY GROWING. Adding that the risk of major conflicts involving major countries is growing, as well as the risk of arms control treaties being violated, Putin exclaimed that the US-led unipolar world is like a dictatorship over other countries and that "US leadership brings no good for others," and calls for a new global consensus.

 
Tyler Durden's picture

McDonalds Sales Plunge In Worst Month Since 2003 Following Dollar Meal "Sticker Shock"





Moments ago, McDonalds not only released earnings and revenues, both of which missed - something which was largely expected since the backward looking data had been telegraphed by MCD's recent global selling collapse - blanketed by atrocious commentary, but it disclosed its September global retail sales which were for lack of a better word, a disaster, after reporting global sales which dropped 3.8%, below the 3.2% expected, and the worst global month since at least 2003. The pain was everywhere, with Europe plunging 4.2% (est -0.9%), Asia down 7.5%, and the US down a whopping 4.1%, far below the 2.8% expected, and also the worst month in over a decade.

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Prepare For GDP Downgrades: Eurasian Snow Flashes Polar Vortex 2.0 Warning





Just when you thought it was safe to believe in escape velocity GDP growth for the US economy... the weather ruins the party. As Bloomberg reports, the snow in Siberia is piling up, and if it keeps coming, people in New York may have to bundle up this winter as theory suggests that the amount of snow covering Eurasia in October is an indication of how much icy air will sweep down from the Arctic in December and January, pouring over parts of North America. "It's still early in the game," says one forecaster, but warns "the snow has gotten off to an incredible start." Polar Vortex 2.0 here we come... and down goes US GDP...

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Frontrunning: October 16





  • Dallas County May Declare State of Disaster From Ebola Virus (BBG)
  • Markets on edge after worst turmoil in four years (Reuters)
  • Central bankers may have no quick fix as markets swoon, economy weakens (Reuters)
  • Risk of Deflation Feeds Global Fears  (Hilsenrath)
  • U.S. health official allowed new Ebola patient on plane with slight fever (Reuters)
  • Texas Hospital Fights Allegations About Ebola Protocols (BBG)
  • Treasuries Gain as Oil Drops Below $80 While Stocks Slide (BBG)
  • Greek Bonds Slump on Bailout Concern as Spain Misses Sale Target (BBG)
  • White House shifts into crisis mode on Ebola response (Reuters)
  • Obama Confronts Slippery Slope as Islamic State Advances (BBG)
 
Tyler Durden's picture

E*Trade Busted For Improperly Trading "Billions" Of Penny Stocks Over 4 Years





As American stock markets become CYNK'd with ever shorter horizons and ever greater aspirations of 'getting rich quick', we thought it fascinating that none other than E*Trade - that bastion of once day-trading prowess and now investing-for-retirement Type-E expertise - has been busted by the SEC for failing in their gatekeeper roles and improperly engaged in unregistered sales of microcap stocks on behalf of their customers. Remember, as the baby explains, "making a big investment is as easy as a single-click..." and so it was that E*Trade sold billions of penny stock shares for customers during a four-year period while ignoring red flags.

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Don’t Worry? 10 Quotes From Health Experts Promising That Ebola Will Not Be A Problem In America





Health experts all over the United States are promising us that we do not need to be worried about Ebola whatsoever.  Even though one case has already been confirmed in Dallas, Texas and another potential case is being monitored, health authorities assure us that we have the greatest health system in the history of the planet and that we will be able to handle any isolated cases very easily.  And all over the mainstream media on Wednesday, there were headlines declaring that the arrival of Ebola in America is a non-event. So are they right?  Should the rest of us just kick back and relax because a bunch of really smart guys are assuring us that our health system can easily deal with anything that Ebola can throw at us?  The following are 10 quotes from prominent experts promising us that Ebola will not be a problem in this country...

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Frontrunning: October 2





  • As we warned in May 2013... Gross Exposes $42 Trillion Bond Market’s Key Flaw in Exit (BBG).... hint: no liquidity
  • WTI Crude Slips Below $90 for First Time in 17 Months (BBG)
  • Traders Thank Fed for Once-in-Decade Surge in Profit (BBG)
  • Islamic State committing 'staggering' crimes in Iraq: U.N. report (Reuters)
  • Philippine Islamist militants threaten to behead German on October 17 (Reuters)
  • Draghi’s Buying Spree for the ECB Might Start Modestly (BBG)
  • Russian Officials Say No Plans for Capital Controls (WSJ)
  • Indians Join the Wave of Investors in Condos and Homes in the U.S. (NYT)
  • Leader of Mexican drugs cartel captured (FT)
  • Dallas Ebola patient vomited outside apartment on way to hospital (Reuters)
 
Tyler Durden's picture

Mario Draghi's Lies Annotated, And A Brief Glimpse At The Truth





Moments ago, the Goldmanite in charge of the European Central Bank delivered yet another speech, this time seeking to offset some of the hawkish comments over the weekend from his comrades, all of which suggested that no more easing, or public QE, was coming any time soon. It was, as usual, full of the same lies that have pushed European stocks to highs not seen since Lehman even as Europe's economy is now slumping into a triple-dip recession. Here is a choice selection of his comments, properly annotated.

 
Tyler Durden's picture

Frontrunning: September 19





  • Scots spurn independence in historic vote but demand new powers (Reuters)
  • Salmond’s Journey as Scotland’s Leader Ends Short of Destination (BBG)
  • European Stocks Rally to 6 1/2-Year High on Scottish Vote (BBG)
  • Jack Ma Planning Personal Roadshow With Clinton to Immelt (BBG)
  • Some consumers say Apple is losing its 'cool' factor (Reuters)
  • Gold IPhones at $3,600 as China Delay Fuels Black Market (BBG)
  • This Man's Job: Make Bill Gates Richer (WSJ)
  • Mom-and-Dad Banks Step Up Aid to First-Time Home Buyers (BBG)
  • France says it launches first air strikes in Iraq (Reuters)
 
Tyler Durden's picture

Guest Post: The US-EU-Russia Sanctions Puzzle





Whatever Russia does, doubt does not even enter the equation. The answer is sanctions. So here we go again. No one ever lost money betting on the stupidity of the usual, unknown “senior US officials” – who are now spinning the latest sanction package is to force Moscow to “respect international law and state sovereignty.” A cursory examination of the historical record allows this paragraph to be accompanied by roaring laughter. As for Russia’s "isolation", companies are barred from, in Washington-Wall Street newspeak, "important dollar-denominated funding sources." Or, euphemistically, "Western capital." This means the US dollar and the euro. Anyone following superimposed moves towards a multipolar world knows Russia does not need more US dollars and euro.

 
Syndicate content
Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!