Illinois

Last year saw a great number of widely publicized instances of food fraud and general nastiness when it came to the various items many of us regularly put in our bodies. From “fake tuna,” to rat meat in the streets of Shanghai, to alcohol in New Jersey diluted with “river water,” the list was seemingly endless. While 2014 has been off to a slow start, it appears the corporate food industry in America is trying to make up for lost time. According to a news release from the USDA on Valentine’s Day: "Rancho Feeding Corporation, a Petaluma, Calif. establishment, is recalling approximately 8,742,700 pounds, because it processed diseased and unsound animals and carried out these activities without the benefit or full benefit of federal inspection." Basically if you live California, Florida, Illinois, Oregon, Texas and Washington you should stay away from Hot Pockets.

"Take a long, hard look, Janet," warns Grant Williams, "the landscape over which you cast your eyes when you accepted the poisoned chalice prestigious role of Fed Chair changed last week." Just two days before you were confirmed in a rather lovely ceremony, in an interview in Mumbai, Raghuram Rajan (one-time Chief Economist at the IMF and current Governor of the Reserve Bank of India) rather UNceremoniously dropped something of a bombshell that went largely unreported (perish the thought, in this era of dogged journalism). The standout feature of central bank policy over the last five years has been the spirit of cooperation... then came the taper. It is every man for himself now, and the Fed will screw them all. The splintering of central bank policy is just the beginning. This is the end of the innocence.

The clean debt ceiling bill has just passed the House where it got the required majority in a 221 to 201 final vote, with just 28 Republicans voting Yea (and 199 voting Nay) - a vote that has made history with the fewest number of votes from a majority on a bill that passed the House since 1991. It also means means that with a Senate passage assured, the US can now spend away until March 15, 2015. The final breakdown:

• GOP: Yea - 28; Nay -199
• DEM: Yea - 193; Nay -2
• Total: Yea - 221; Nay - 201

Considering that the vast majority of Republicans voted against John Boehner's latest "plan" to do the Democrats' work for them, and pass a clean debt ceiling, perhaps it is time to look for a speaker who represents the interests of more than just a tiny fraction of the party... and the Democrats of course.

While we realize that newsflow over the past few years has taken a decided turn for the surreal, we are sad (or, alternatively, delighted) to announce that we are dead serious when we report that Illinois governor Pat Quinn has now tapped The Onion - that would be the famous satiric website - to sell Obamacare. Perhaps we should not be surprised: after we previously revealed that The Onion served as the mystery source of economic insight by such intellectual economist titans as Paul Krugman and Larry Summers, the time may have come come to surrender to the great wave of absurdity that has washed over this nation, and admit that when it comes to pitching idiotic policies, self-referential satire may be the only option left in the arsenal of the central planners.

• Here is why AAPL bounced off $500: Apple Repurchases $14 Billion of Own Shares in Two Weeks (WSJ)
• German Court Refers OMT Decision to Europe's Top Court (WSJ)
• Inflation Fuels Crises in Two Latin Nations (WSJ)
• U.S. job growth seen snapping back from winter chill (Reuters)
• Google to own $750 million Lenovo stake after Motorola deal closes: HK exchange (Reuters)
• Frigid Winter Spells Trouble for U.S. Economy (BBG)
• Winter Games to open, Putin keen to prove doubters wrong (Reuters)
• Regulators Ready to Proceed on Bank Leverage Limit (WSJ)
• Abe Eyes Window for Biggest Military-Rule Change Since WWII (BBG)

"The slump in the recent ISM data may be the ?straw in the wind? of what is to come. Certainly the three-month change of the leading indicator has now turned down sharply ? even before the recent ISM data has been incorporated. We watch the unfolding EM crisis with increasing trepidation because we know how this story ends. We have been here before. And even if the Fed resumes massive QE at some point as the world melts down, and markets desperately attempt their return to the dream trance, they will instead find themselves locked into a Freddie Kruger-like nightmare in which phase 3 of this secular bear market takes equity valuations down to levels not seen for a generation." - Albert Edwards

Once again the smell of NAPALM is in the air

XKCD published this cartoon in reference to ESPN and the like, but it’s even more applicable to CNBC and its ilk. Just to be clear, I’m not slamming these hosts and traders. I’m sure that they are overwhelmingly smart, honest people who believe that what they say are useful truths from their own perspectives. They are not hypocrites. But they are performers. And like any performer, there is a larger game being played with their words. The larger meaning of the statements made on CNBC has absolutely nothing to do with specific investment advice or news. CNBC really could not care less about the actual content of what is being said. The purpose of CNBC’s game is not to tell you WHAT to think, but HOW to think, that thinking about investing in terms of some sell-side analyst’s anodyne story about fundamentals or some trader’s breathless story about open option interest is smart or wise or what all the cool kids are doing. Why? Because CNBC can create inexpensive content essentially at will to fill this demand, allowing them to sell advertisements and take cable carriage fees. 

If a third of all US homes cannot trade due to being underwater or not sufficiently above water to clear closing costs, then the US economy is going to suffer

• Only time will define Bernanke's crisis-era legacy at Fed (Reuters)
• Record Cash Leaves Emerging Market ETFs (BBG)
• Investors Look Toward Safer Options as Ground Shifts (WSJ)
• Fed Policy Makers Rally Behind Tapering QE as Yellen Era Begins (BBG)
• Rating agencies criticise China’s bailout of failed $500m trust (FT)
• Russia to await new Ukraine government before fully implementing rescue (Reuters)
• U.S. readies financial sanctions against Ukraine: congressional aides (Reuters)
• Companies resist president’s call for minimum wage rise (FT)
• Secret Swiss Funds at Risk as Italy’s Saccomanni Visits Bern (BBG)
• Top Democrat puts Obama trade deals in doubt (FT)
• Erdogan to Give Rate Increase Time Before Trying Other Plans (BBG)

• Obama warns divided Congress that he will act alone (Reuters)
• Fed Decision Day Guide From Emerging Markets to FOMC Voter Shift (BBG)
• Fed poised for $10 billion taper as Bernanke bids adieu (Reuters)
• Bernanke’s Unprecedented Rescue Unlikely to Be Repeated (BBG)
• Argentina Spends $115 Million to Steady Peso (WSJ)
• Billionaires Fuming Over Market Selloff That Sinks Magnit (BBG)
• SAC’s Counsel Testifies at Insider Trading Trial in Unexpected Move by the Defense (NYT)
• Automakers Fuel Japan’s Longest Profit Growth Streak Since 2007 (BBG)
• Turkey Crisis Puts Jailed Millionaire at Heart of Gold Trail (BBG)
• Ukraine expects $2 billion tranche of Russian aid soon (Reuters)

• Emerging markets pray for Wall Street tumble (Reuters)
• Yellen Faces Test Bernanke Failed: Ease Bubbles (BBG)
• Samsung sets new smartphone sales record in fourth quarter, widens lead over Apple (Reuters)
• China’s Foreign-Reserves Investment Chief Said to Depart Agency (BBG)
• China’s Rescue of Troubled Trust May Stoke Risk-Taking (BBG)
• Ukraine PM Azarov offers to resign 'to help end conflict' (Reuters) ... And Russia says may reconsider aid if this happens
• But... but... it was all gold's fault: India Unexpectedly Raises Rate as Rupee Risks Inflation Goal (BBG)
• Former Belgian king 'boycotting' public events after complaining £760,000 is not enough to live on (Telegraph)
• Greek disposable income tumbles 8% in Q3 (Kathimerini)

"I am a former employee of Sears Holdings/K-Mart. I live in Streator, Illinois and our store was “liquidated” in early 2013. There are a lot of “ironies” affiliated with our particular store closure that I would like to make you aware of...

As for Eddie Lampert, I hope he enjoys his exclusive island mansion and all of the perks that he’s afforded off the backs of people like me. I just hope I can find another job soon because I’m clearly one of the “little people” in his world that would just like to know my light bill will get paid."

The market just hit a fresh all time high today which means another major default must be just around the horizon. Sure enough, the FT reported moments ago that a Puerto Rico default "appears increasingly likely" and is why creditors are meeting with lawyers and bankruptcy specialists (supposedly Jone Day, which means where Corinne Ball is Ken Buckfire, fresh from its recent league table success with the Detroit bankruptcy, can't be far behind) on Thursday in New York.  The FT cited a restructuring advisor, supposedly desperate to sign the engagement letter with creditors and to force the bankruptcy, who said that "the numbers are untenable" and "to issue new debt the yield would have to rise and where they can’t raise new money they will have to stop paying."

The polar vortex came, saw, and is on its way out, and now comes the time for the damage report. As Reuters reports, "At least nine deaths have been reported across the country connected with the polar air mass that swept over North America during the past few days. Authorities have put about half of the United States under a wind chill warning or cold weather advisory.... Homeless shelters and public buildings took in people who were freezing outside. Daniel Dashner, a 33-year-old homeless man who typically sleeps under a bridge on Milwaukee's south side, said he opted to seek a spot at a shelter on Monday night. "Usually if I have four or five blankets, I can stay pretty warm, but when that wind is blowing, I don't care how many blankets I have, the wind blows right through me," he said, as temperatures dropped to minus 6 degrees Fahrenheit (minus 21 degrees Celsius)." On the other hand, there was some levity in the newsflow, when as AP reported, an escape inmate opted for the familiar warmth of prison and turned himself in.