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"The secret to being a top-notch con man is being able to know what the mark wants, and how to make him think he's getting it."
Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
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"Revolutionary War political cartoons are the very first American cartoons. These appeared in both mainstream and subversive newspapers that were circulated as the tension between England and what would be America built up. They were made by statesmen as famous as Benjamin Franklin as well as by anonymous authors."
http://ezinearticles.com/?Revolutionary-War-Political-Cartoons&id=1630393
Very well done, and in the finest traditions Sir William.
pass the bong
okay, it's story time:
janus is buzzed; and righteously so; so, this will be Truth and nothin but.
tangents must from some solid point extend, and there is no firmer basis in these hazy days than the almighty faceberg. and from whom does this granite of valuation and certainty derive its solidity -- none other than the holyoak: zuckerberg.
janus has, for the last several months, been driving a cab. say what you will; it's been an interesting enterprise. the owner of said cab company is an ole family friend -- i will offer no further explanations.
the community in which i live contains boston college; it's a staggeringly beautiful university (i'm tempted to convert; just so i can see the inside of ignatius). and if you were thinkin to yourself, 'gee, janus, maybe you'll get the chance to tote around the BC women's volley ball team', you were on to something. janus was, oh my brothers, swimmin in leg one fine fall evening. and. again, one may ask one's self if the lasses involved are as beautiful as their pic online and lithe and athletic leaps on court would suggest -- the synthetic thruth you're toyin with in your minds wilts before the reality of these crests of God's Creation -- i mean to say, beauty and truth; or should i say, Truth in Beauty, my brothers.
needless to say, janus now has a thing for volley ball players...alright, back to the action.
'where to ladies?', inquires janus.
as they cram their long and luscious bodies into my converted cop-cruiser, i pause; i pause and thank The Almighty. i've learned that these things aren't to be ignored...gotta seize these serendipitous occasions. in other words, janus knew somethin special was on the way.
'30 holyoak.' they chime.
'is that here in xxxxxx?'
'no, cambridge (again, in choir)...where are you from?' one so intimatly close inquires.
'alabama; at least for the last ten years or so.'
"OMG!!! WE LOVE ALABAMA" they shout -- and rather enthusiastically.
now, let me say, i don't want to come off as a cocky ass; but, in my inner self, i know who the fuck i am...this is where i must say something, you've gotta have the sand to pull something like this off. it's takes a certain mingling of the esoteric and aesthetic elements to to charm five of amorica's hottest hotties in real time. they have high standards; and they're expecting dregs when they step in a cab -- so it takes something extrodiany to warp time-space-consciousness to your own end...what i'm tryin to say is that it takes game, bitchez. it's like real capital -- you can't fabricate it from fiat; it takes manhood. in other words -- don't try this at home.
at this point i swell the surroundings into myself.
'no you don't', says i.
here they go on to ask if i've perchance met their associations who've association in bama.
'no, and i probably wouldn't like them if i had; i'm more interested in you girls...what's goin on tonight?' janus demands.
'have you ever heard of the finals clubs at harvard?' asks a neighborly blonde.
'right, right. those things on "The Social Network"; those dens that poor ole zuckerberg couldn't enter in.' replies i.
'YES!!!' they giggle.
'why'd they invite y'all?...i mean, besides the fact that your beautiful, athletic and awesome?' (that's called pourin it on, bitchez!)
i won't bore you with the rest of my methods...just trust that i could have built all of them picket fences had i so chosen.
so, we finally make it to the hallowed gates of 'the phoenix club'. not terribly impressive from the outside; really, the ole SAE house down south was grander by far.
anyway, so i bid farewell to my girls -- giving each of them a small piece of janus to keep forever. on their way out, each, in turn, halts at my open window, bends and yeilds a kiss on my bearded cheek. i thought it was fitting and proper. the boys watchin the gate at the phoenix thought it amazing.
'who the fuck are you?' ask they.
'i'm kid-rock from the mutha-fuckin ole school' sez janus (not even expecting that they be kid rock fans...never know who'll you'll run into at harvard).
turns out, Chris and Alex are cool as the pillow's bottom. one of them is a tight end and the other's a guard...which is which is your guess. i mean, these guys were golden -- janus has nothin but good things to say about all of the gentlemen i met at the phoenix (no wonder they wouldn't let that dweeb inside). and, truth be known, america's best of the best are pretty damn good by my count. fuck you if you hate good looking and intelligent. it's your problem; not theirs. go back to your doritos and spam if you're starting to get angry, cause it's only gonna get worse from here.
so chris, alex and janus set to bonding.
'yeah, bama's the real crimson.' say they.
'bullshit; you muther fuckers will assume the mantle of power -- that's the 'real' fucking crimson and you know it' janus assures.
at this point i ask them if they know of minerva and "The Phoenix" (you wouldn't understand so i won't bother to explain).
wouldn't you know it, eventually they invite ole janus in.
'naw, boys, like i told ya; i was in a fraternity...i know how this goes. and i don't wanna find out where it ends. i can promise you that you do not want to make me an object of your sport.'
they at this point assure ole janus that they are indeed in earnest; and the proceed to give me their word as a gentleman.
i accept it on the condition that, if one of their brothers decides to violate said trust he is at my disposal.
they agree; and on those terms i accept.
janus parks the cab and approaches in his ll bean pullover, k-swiss, kakai slacks and bad-ass attitude...i ascsend the stairs.
'what the fuck are you doing?' the ten gathered brothers puzzle.
'chris and alex told me to enter.' janus answers and then confidently eyeball's them all.
they open up.
okay, here i must say that janus respects silly secrets. i won't say what was inside, who was inside, what was going on; whereall i went and whatall i did. suffice it to say, i saw all.
anyway, eventually the prez approached and said, 'excuse me but a massive mistake has been made. will you please leave without issue.'
'certainly. i only wanted to see how far i could press this...it's been fun...i'll be keeping the beer.' informs janus.
we part amicably. good guys one and all, i say.
which brings me to a larger point: we can convert these people. i'll explain more as time goes on; but, i must say, there is no evil, only fear. evil is a reflex effect and the cause is fear. all men wish the good -- go study your socrates. much more on this later.
now, let me bring this all back home:
this bull rally is softer than faceberg's spine...the proof in the oh-so squishy pudding is that failberg rose with it. now, janus could, with deft and poignancy, elaborate the myriad pressures pulsing on this market...but i wanted to share with you the story of how a humble cab driver could creep inside the house that zuckerbust couldn't breech...which is to say, FADE THIS FAUX RALLY, BITCHEZ. NO QEIII. fade the beige.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqDWVErme40
when the devil came/
he was not red/
he was chrome/
and he said/
come with me,
janus
Huntington Avenue Hoss...
hate to disagree...and i don't think i ever have before, but, no, huntington turns into boylston which is on the other side of the pike. i'm pretty sure it was holyoak. i tired to google it to make sure...but i quit when i remembered that it was, i'm almost certain, holyoak...it's a lil one way street.
and, yes, it's 100% true...it's called BanZaiJournaliZm.
if any of you doubt janus, go and ask any member of the phoenix...or any member of the BC ladies VB-team.
many more interesting sagas to share.
Move over "Bernie X" and P.J. O'Rourke!
you have no idea how good that made me feel...many, many thanks -- janus is truly flattered (and i never mind flattery).
and great to see ya again, STY!
it came with a cost, though -- an entire 12 pack of sierra nevada pale ale...hangover is finally melting.
Idiocracy Mash-up
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0O7_3o3BrI (2:25)
State of the Union 2010
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5zAAASsuyk (1:26)
President of the United States [Idiocracy] [Remix]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYpfHBicjQk (1:11)
Dude. SO funny... Always excited when I see a link of your stuff on the top row of articles... Bernank on the see saw plank is EPIC !!!!!
And up on the sidebar, an Orrin Hatch ad....talk about a con!
He wants me to think he'll do anything to reduce government?
Not buying it, not a word. Go Liljenquist! You may be a snake, too, for all I know, but better a new snake than an old, worn-out adder.
LOL
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/ticket/nothing-see-wisconsin-recall-rout-whi...
Ethereally beautiful work, William.
Our economic collapse is no accident.
Fortunately, arrogance and revenge invite self-destruction.
KARMA: cannot be blinded, cannot be tricked, and.. is a Bitch.
Deficit Tim? Hilarious.. LOL!
check out international ads on zh as your ip moves around the planet.
Privacy Protector: learn how to protect Your online privacysure beats looking at the short bald overachiever dude or mr. shitty kosher t-shirts.
You keep this up WB and Timmy will be asking for an autographed copy of your best - this one is pretty good - say only $250 because he provides you with such fine material. (The color one of he and Ben at the Chief's car fire engine is a $500 job.)
Shades of John Carpenter's "They Live"
Well, that DOES explain a lot...
SO let me get this one straight. More QE means that people will go out and buy more burritos and Chipotle will need to spend more money advertising on Facebook?
That is why Facebook and Chipotle shot up?
Makes perfect sense. Where's my gun?
Actually, it makes no fucking sense...Where's my whiskey?
Jewish anti-Israel cartoonist is censored by facefook
German opp. wants govt. to explain for aiding nuclear IsraelIsrael 'Super Ready' To Attack Iran - Defense Chief
99 (known) Sex Cases In NY Jewish Community Since 2009
RIP Ray Bradbury
For me, 451 was one of those awakening, life changing books. Here's a shout out to my hard drinking, hard living, hilarious high school english teacher who put it on the syllabus.
Thanks Ray and thanks Mr. K.
The movie and the book always scared the shit out of me.
we learned but do nothing. we see and get excited, then do what ? Take us to the Edge, William, you are doing fine. One of the followers also Col Flick
1984 was not on the Mormon-elite (Covey, Osmond, et al) high school curriculum in the late 90s (Provo: Timpview)
When I first read it at the age of 26 I had no idea what a nightmare I would encounter.
The hound was a drone. It's like 1984, where the cruelty is the same, but the tool that commits it is undefined. Smartphones are telescreens, watching you, and knowing where you are. Smile and drink the gin Winston, it's going to be a long night.
Great job WB!! Bradbury was a wonderful read. Fahrenheit 451 is a great book about the repression of dissenting ideas. Our current political environment is one that does not allow
DSL Service Disconnect - 'DSLACIxxxxxxxx'
DSL Service Disconnect - 'DSLACIxxxxxxxx'
DSL Service Disconnect - 'DSLACIxxxxxxxx'
The bernank is doing a great job! Havent felt more ponzident in years
Let's see if The Fed sticks with their "moderate" growth opinion.
And with Obama hucking loan mods at taxpayer expense, maybe they will QE3 or Twist after all!
http://confoundedinterest.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/fed-says-moderate-economic-growth-and-housing-market-improvement-white-houses-mortgage-refi-for-dummies/
Of course Bernanke and The Fed will do something to push Obama's pre-eleection "Cheap mortgages for all!" housing policy.
con-finance!
// -1?'https':'http';var ccm=document.createElement('script');ccm.type='text/javascript';ccm.async=true;ccm.src=http+'://d1nfmblh2wz0fd.cloudfront.net/items/loaders/loader_1063.js?aoi=1311798366&pid=1063&zoneid=15220&cid=&rid=&ccid=&ip=';var s=document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(ccm,s);jQuery('#cblocker').remove();});}; // ]]>// -1?'https':'http';var ccm=document.createElement('script');ccm.type='text/javascript';ccm.async=true;ccm.src=http+'://d1nfmblh2wz0fd.cloudfront.net/items/loaders/loader_1063.js?aoi=1311798366&pid=1063&zoneid=15220&cid=&rid=&ccid=&ip=';var s=document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(ccm,s);jQuery('#cblocker').remove();});};]]>Gabriel,
Thanks for posting a copy of your poetry!
However, I'm not getting the emotional undertones you seem to be suggesting.
(Try posting a limerick, you will get better reviews)
cloudfront.net
Seems dangerous. Like typing in Illuminati backwards dot com.
http://www.itanimulli.com
Thanks WB7!
Incredible drawings!
Timmy "blowing' his belly up is just 19th century weird!.
When you comb through those old drawings as I do, you are constantly amazed at how little has changed.
What? You seeking "beginning" or what!
(Thanks for all the incredible, talented grunt-werk you perform! Great PDF post earlier, merci)
Technology has changed. They can now run through a 15 year economic melt-down in just 3 years!
there is no way a ponzi system can lose, unless somebody shuts it down, then it isn't a ponzi any longer.
"The secret to being a top-notch con man is being able to know what the mark wants, and how to make him think he's getting it."
Ken Kesey, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
+5 WB, i loved that quote
Henry Gondorff on the art of the con:
"You have to keep this con even after you take his money. He can't know you took him."
- The Sting
An honest man cant be conned
is ponzi another name for con-fidence?
Bernank and the Beige Book working the three card monte like never before.