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MiTT SWaMi: THe LBO LoVe GuRu...
ZOMBINOMICS 101: LBO Job Creation STEP 1: Find underpriced and under leveraged public companies that are generating tons of excess cashflow. Borrow tons of money to purchase them and take them “private.” Pay yourself tons of closing and management fees. STEP 2: Strip and sell off non-core assets. Maximize operating efficiencies (a euphemism for restructuring the workforce, i.e., you’re fired!) in order to service tons of new debt, pay yourself ongoing management fees and special dividends. STEP 3A: Wait for the right opportunity to exit via a strategic sale or IPO. Collect more fees. Fire some more employees for good measure. STEP 3B: Blow the company up and liquidate everything. Collect more fees. Fire all the empoyees. STEP 3C: Bankruptcy– pass the whole piece of junk your distressed asset team. Collect more fees. Somebody’s going to get fired. Job Creation: Hire more associates and analysts to look for more LBO deals. Q: Hey Banzai, private equity doesn’t work that way anymore, right? There’s just too much competition for too few deals. A: Perhaps, but this is how it worked when Swamney was the…LBO LOVE GURU!
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This LBO Swami from Bain
Got rich from inflicting much pain
He worships The Green
His wealth is obscene
His morals were sold for a gain
The Limerck King
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The Kleptocrats pose for a shot The Limerick King
They smile for the money they've got
They smile for their power
That grows every hour
They smile for the world they just bought
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I don't think the Queen would care for such an exchange ;-)
The proper gift opens doors. What does she like? From what I've read she likes horses, competent servants, revenge, large islands and anything that increases her omnipotence. Surely Rimm can squeeze out a few quid for something. Its not like he has to outperform Timmay, its just a gift. Short of an audience with the figurehead of banksters, Mormons control enough of Hollywood to fake it well enough. It would probably amuse her if they did, as long as they didn't do it too well.
Step 4: Claim that since 1999 you had nothing to do with anything Bain.
Even though you were still CEO and purported Bain business to establish residence in Massachusetts.
Fuckin' Bain Boy!
Loves a drowning pleb.
Great Naked Capitalism piece on how Mitt Romney's field of 'private equity' is basically another government-funded scam ... most of their capital is really government money:
http://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2012/08/private-equity-a-government-spons...
You are too funy William. Thank's for the chuckle.
Is that a hybrid?
Looks more like: O/Droner,in a buble,help i cant get out!
You recharge the batteries by parking the rear bumper on high voltage lines.
It's called the "Chevy Watt?"
Yes...half Kenyan.
A bailout mobile paid for by the taxpayer to pay back the votes bought from big labor.
Like every green company we paid for.
Like everything this Admin does.
We may not like what Romney did when he had a real job - but at least he had one.
A draft dodger is running on the republican ticket. I could not make this up.
And there's one on the democratic ticket as well...its like Draft Dodgers Unite!!!...or sumpin...lol.
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That would be Uncle Joe, a heartbeat away ;-)
We are sooooo fucked.
Obamney 2012, Hasten the Collapse
Yes we are...math doesnt lie, only the people telling us what it means do ;-)
Which bailout you talking about, the shitty cars or the shitty deals?
Thank you, thank you. Agent P and I will be here all week. Don't forget to tip your minimum wage server - and WB7 while you're at it.
BANG!
Right in the kisser.
Too funny! :>)
Just a little touch-up paint and we'll be fine.
Who's up for a round of golf? Someone needs to get my clubs out of the trunk.
LOL.
Planet O; as in "Obscurity" or is it "Offender"
But get the soap on a rope you dope!
Big 0 at the olympics
We can dream, can't we?
Would that be the American(you got to be asleep,to belive it)coldnt resist!!
Peace to the planet,NOW!