hedgeless_horseman's 12 Days of Christmas ~ Gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life

hedgeless_horseman's picture

Here are a dozen holiday gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life...

1.       Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk $10
Perfect for the newbie.

2.       Abraham-A Journey to the Heart of Three Faiths  by Bruce Feiler $10 http://www.brucefeiler.com/books/abraham.html
For the zealot in your life that needs to learn that Christians, Jews, and Muslims all pray to the same God.

3.       Confessions of an Economic Hit Man by John Perkins $10
For the person in your life still climbing the corporate ladder.

4.       The Creature From Jekyll Island-A Second Look at the Federal Reserve by G. Edward Griffin $20 http://www.amazon.com/Creature-Jekyll-Island-Federal-Reserve/dp/0912986212
Every American should read this book.

5.       The Encyclopedia of Country Living-10th Edition by Carla Emery $20
For the person who watches reruns of Green Acres and dreams of getting away from it all.

6.       Born to Run- A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen by Christopher McDougall $10
and a pair of DIY Luna Sandals $60
For the person that could drop a few pounds and enjoy life more.


7.       Surefire G2X Pro Flashlight $95
Perfect for any kid you care for enough to send the very best.

8.       Benchmade 760 LFTi folding knife $200

along with a hard copy of  A Guide for Those with Much Money and Very Little Patience Whom Want to Prepare for Zombie Apocalypse But Are Afraid to Google It For Fear of DHS Labeling Them A Terrorist.

Get that special someone started on the Guide with a quality blade for everyday carry.

9.       Wiggy's Sleeping Bag $200-$300
The gift for those who froze during Sandy.

10.   Filson Oil Finish Double Tin Bibs and Tin Cruiser Jacket $490
For the person in your life that already has rural land.


11.   Rohrbaugh R9S pistol $1,000
and Nemesis pocket holster $25
The gold-standard gift for the Concealed Handgun License holder in your life.

12.   $50 face value bag of 90% Silver Barber Dimes (357.5 oz of Silver)
This Christmas say, "Fuck you JPM!" with the gift of real money.




Merry Christmas! 

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tongue.stan's picture

Pretty good list. I might add the complete works of Shakespeare.

After the reset, you're gonna have a lot of time on your hands.

And you'll have something timeless and useful to pass onto the future.

At some point humanity will have to understand itself.

lakecity55's picture

I wanna case of RPGs

rsnoble's picture

All I want from anyone here on ZH is a 20pk of budlight.

I've been telling everyone here for "over a year", literally, that Nasdaq 3100 is the top.  And no, that doesn't mean that I missed the boat at 3175.  Duh.

Pay up or shut up im thirsty.

This wasn't misguided, ignorant or otherwise lucky advice it was methodically calculated and still in play.

Thanks in advance.

Of course I expect to get get shit on as is usually the case.

Yes_Questions's picture



Well, what a list indeed.

and cheaper than the $107k currently priced "Twelve days of Christmas" items.

nmewn's picture


Real capitalism always finds the correct risk/reward match...besides, nine ladies dancing around the house probably wouldn't go over real well with Mrs. HH ;-)

hairball48's picture


"$50 face value bag of 90% Silver Barber Dimes (357.5 oz of Silver)
This Christmas say, "Fuck you JPM!" with the gift of real money."

357.5 oz of Silver in $50.00  worth of dimes? Shouldn't that be ~36.17 oz of Silver?  (500x.07234)

hairball48's picture

Ah it should read a $500.00 bag not $50.00

Everyone(the little peeps) I know uses .7234 oz/$face Why does that outfir use .715oz/$face? 'Cause they're Barber dimes and really old? and therefore worn so smaller factor?

I'm asking because I don't buy bags like you rich guys do:)

mendolover's picture

Gimme a 'Hell Yeah'! if you're tired of the fucking piped in Christmas music everywhere you go already!  Everyday should be Christmas!  This fucked up world would be a much better place!

PS - Fuck you Costas!

CB's picture

Filson's is union made. Idontthinkso.

hedgeless_horseman's picture



Do you know of an equivalent alternative?

Wakanda's picture

I bought a bunch of GrillGrate sets to give:


They are useful and appreciated before and after TSHTF.  Over a campfire or even a cheap gas grill they're the best thing for BBQ since matches.

LFMayor's picture

The hell with the man-dals.  First time you run though brush and drive a cat-briar under your toe nail you'll weep blood. 

Buy some decent Bates or Belleville boots and get them broke in.

hannah's picture

$60 for barefoot running shoes..?!...fuck that. go to target and get a pair of $2 flipflops and make your own.


oh and an ak beats a sig any day comrade...

debtor of last resort's picture

HH not just frontrunning the cb's but the whole system in my opinion. Thanks for your posts!

Sudden Debt's picture

what about a card that says:

Look arround and see them smile not knowing what is comming.
Enjoy these times as if they are the last times of plenty.
And tomorrow, Januari 2, sell those stupid gifts on Ebay and buy more silver!

kaiserhoff's picture

Great idea HH.  How about giving your family the gift of good health?

Prescriptions for Nutritional Healing - Phyllis Balch

I've read a couple of dozen books on herbal and nutritional approaches to medicine.  This the most comprehensive and reliable..., and yes, you can grow your own meds;)  Merry Christmas

NotApplicable's picture

I bought those for family gifts a few years ago.

Good thing to keep in the glove box.


Dave Thomas's picture

How bout just not buying anything at all. Make your friends and loved ones a portrait of Jon Corzine with a Dixie plate, some macaroni, pipe cleaners, and glitter. You know stuff you have around the house.

Wakanda's picture

I'm sure I could get my ink jet to print Jon's face on some toilet paper.

catacl1sm's picture

I actually have all of those things around my house. {sigh}

Lost Wages's picture

Those dimes are sold out.

otto skorzeny's picture

how bout a Romanian 75 round drum mag for the AK? also-$1k for a 9mm 9rd pistol? I'll take a Yugo AK underfolder for $600 and get 2000 rds of FMJ with the other $400-it "conceals" under my trenchoat ;)

LFMayor's picture

+1 on the Kalash.  We've found that the Korean drums do right well, too. 

chunga's picture

Mistletoe, a little egg nog, and a Yugo M70 AB2 would be a great holiday treat.


AnAnonymous's picture

Nice list.

Best idea maybe: copy this list, print the document and offer it on Christmas day.

The laughter will be worth all the items and more.

'Americans' are wonderful when it comes to hype, selling propaganda and fantasy. Best salespeople for this stuff ever.

Mention to the ultramen. 'Americans' and their fantasies on humanity.

They got the overmen. Now they've got the ultra athlete.

As the texan idol could say: "where is the syringe?"

moroots's picture

"'Americans' are wonderful"


akak's picture

"Insanitation and hypocriticality are the mattering things in AnAnonymousitizenism eternal nature, the crustiest bits of a certain kneejerk bigoted blobbing-up something."


Intoxicologist's picture

Like clockwork, OnAndOnymous shows up to dump ass on the ZH "roadside."

TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

Best Christmas gift for AnAnonymous: an LSD and Jalapeno enema.

mjcOH1's picture

Hey....the local Chinese communist party boss will still occasionally gift a 9mm round if your daddy ends up on the losing side of the infighting for factory kickback dollars. 

Merry Christmas Comrade!

yabyum's picture

How about a feast of the good stuff that hedge cooks up UMMM!! That special someone always could use some fertile land and a good well!

hedgeless_horseman's picture



Last night's dinner consisted of lettuce, mint, parsley, shallots, hot peppers, and lime juice, all from the garden, with a little bit of home-grown grass-fed beef.  The Thai Fish Sauce came from the store.

Yes_Questions's picture



Looks like my lunch most days.


I knew I liked you.

Agent P's picture

Wow, that looks good, and I think the fish sauce officially qualifies it as "surf-n-turf"

Uncle Remus's picture

I knew I shoulda put locks on the freezers...



XitSam's picture

Filson is too expensive.  I'll pay for Carhartt when I have to but no more.

yabyum's picture

Filson is made in the USA, Carhartt in foreign sweatshops.....Filson for me ( I have a pair of 15yo tin pants)

dbTX's picture

I've got 15 or 20 Filson shirts that are 15 to 20 years old and I'm still wearing them. Filson is the absolute last word in quality.

Uncle Remus's picture

Read the fine print ese, made in USA from imported fabrics. WTF, is that stuff the AAPL of outerwear?

AGuy's picture

"made in USA from imported fabrics"

There are no more fabric manufacturers in the US anymore. The last of the machinery was shipped to China about five years ago.


taxpayer102's picture



@AGuy -

Wish you could see the denim produced and exported from this Southern mill.


Uncle Remus's picture

And naturally they are not "sweatshops".

Intoxicologist's picture

Holy moly, I could make a house payment with what those Filson's cost!  I'll stick with my well-worn, USA-made Walls Blizzard Pruf bibs.  Inexpensive and wearing them feels like being tucked inside my own personal oven.

Jason T's picture

I never heard of Tin pants.. good to know exist and mankind still makes things of quality...that lasts!

Intoxicologist's picture

No offense, HH, but I bristle at the consumer trap Christmas has become.  I won't have any part of it, either in the giving or receiving of gifts. If I want to give someone a gift, I'm going to do it when I feel like it, not because the calender dictates I must.  My friends and family are able to enjoy the holiday spirit without going broke in the process, and it's a lot less stressful. 

Wakanda's picture

The tradition of gift giving at this time of year has to do with distributing the harvest and culling the herds.  In the northern latitudes tribes had the difficult task of either storing or distributing the foods that they had worked for.  Save as much as possible, but trade for stuff you don't have.  Might as well throw a party, invite the folks upstream or downstream, play, flirt, trade, build a big fire, share news, learn a new skill, paaarty!  Festivus Maximus in Rome was just the big roll up of a thousand different traditions from the conquered lands.  The gift giving near the solstice predated Christianity for many thousands of years.

In the Pacific Northwest the natives held Potlatches.  Whoever gave away the most berries, salmon, roots, or whatever got to be the biggest swinging dick for a year.  Some years you had the big haul, other times it was another tribe.  It worked fine as long as everyone shared.

The higher your latitude, the more your culture is tied to the swings in seasons and the solstices.  Equatorial peoples celebrate for different reasons because the harvests there are not as urgent.

We give gifts now because the earth is tilted.