BaNK RuNS...

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Fri, 05/18/2012 - 00:59 | 2438575 General Debility
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Kirk: I have a wierd feeling of deja vu. How will we get out of this chaos?

Spock: The purpose is to experience fear, fear in the face of certain death, to accept that fear, and maintain control of oneself and one's crew. This is the quality expected in every Starfleet captain.

Oh and Scottie, have you finished with your tapeworm study? Are they indeed Vulcan as expected?

Scottie: Yes we are just waiting for William Banzai to complete the new Tapeworm series in his latest weapon of Visual Combat before we release the findings.

Fri, 05/18/2012 - 02:42 | 2438729 HD
HD's picture

Kobayashi Maru indeed. It's what central bankers have been trying to do - cheat.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 22:33 | 2438247 arnoldsimage
arnoldsimage's picture

" Jim... what the greeks really need is a weekend music fest from marla's treasure chest of trance."

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 22:07 | 2438172 HD
HD's picture



Spock: Captain, we must find a way to stop the world's economy from collapsing or the Federation will never exist. Logically, the Facebook IPO must be stopped.

Kirk: Later Spock, later.  We're here to stop JJ Abrams.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:26 | 2437945 bsdetector
bsdetector's picture

Spock, if we beam the money up they will just think it was vaporized.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:06 | 2437889 Yohimbo
Yohimbo's picture

going esoteric there, into the mysterious new age we go. 


Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:34 | 2437961 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

in this day and age, forget riots and protests.


To get your politician's attention, take your money out of the bank.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 19:24 | 2437814 SILVERGEDDON

" Jim, these banker people are worse than the Klingons from Uranus. At least they stopped fucking nations and people when they were dead. "

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 18:27 | 2437651 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Bank runs = green shits.

Its a matter of interpretation ;-)

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:13 | 2437908 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

Soylent green is made of ppl

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 18:32 | 2437658 New_Meat
New_Meat's picture

"... green shits."

I saw that in the PI one night ;-)

- Ned

{OT--figgerd I'd try Sac's new thingie}

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 19:39 | 2437820 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Yeah, I have not had time to figger out how it works...guess I need to scope it out.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:38 | 2437465 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

"Captain, do you think they'll let us play the Facebook IPO while dressed as extras for The Sting?"

"Actually, Spock, it's oddly appropriate.  Set investor phasers to stun."

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:36 | 2437453 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Don't worry be happy:  One Million Yen for a pair of melons???  Yes!

Yubari melons fetch one million yen

A pair of premium melons from Hokkaido has fetched a price of one million yen, or about 12,500 dollars, in this year's first auction for the fruit.

The 2 melons were among 110 Yubari melons put up for auction on Thursday morning at a market in Sapporo in Japan's northern prefecture.

The winning bidder, a vegetable wholesaler based in Hokkaido, said it asked a broker to make sure to place the top bid.

The company plans to display the melons at an affiliated restaurant and serve them to customers when ripe.

Farmers say this year's melons are sweet, after surviving a cold and snowy winter.

May 17, 2012 - Updated 05:31 UTC (14:31 JST)

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 21:09 | 2438031 JohnG
JohnG's picture

And they glow in the dark.

No extra "charge."

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 18:23 | 2437642 EFNuttin
EFNuttin's picture

Glad you like them.  They are quite a pair, but please try not to stare.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:30 | 2437428 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

"Spock, it looks like these Greeks want a piece of the action."

"No Jim, I believe it is a sudden fit of logic."

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:20 | 2437387 Bastiat
Bastiat's picture



Spock: Irrational: I see no difference between these Euros and Federation Credits.

KirK: Ever try to pay a Ferenghi hooker with Federation Credits?

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 19:31 | 2437837 covert
covert's picture

counterfeit the latinum and rob ft knox.



Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:32 | 2437956 Long-John-Silver
Long-John-Silver's picture

Latinum is Gold plated Tungsten. Earthlings convinced the Ferengi that Gold plated Tungsten was very valuable because why else would they keep it in such a secure place.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:14 | 2437375 Snakeeyes
Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:08 | 2437333 miltiadis
miltiadis's picture

All Europe seems to love Merkel...

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:15 | 2437912 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

... crispy ...

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 17:04 | 2437318 falak pema
falak pema's picture

the bulls of Pamplona are more deadly than the Chicago commodity bulls; its the bull-shit that has now to be recycled that is becoming awesome. Where can we pile up this huge pile of bull dung? No woman wants to sniff at it even doused in Dior or Channel #5  sweetener. Even DOw/Monsanto say its too cheap to sell as competitor to their carcinogenic fertilizer and GMO fake corn rhino-horn on the cob.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:30 | 2437149 Blegoo
Blegoo's picture



"Those guys... in black... with sky masks... are those forks, or kalashnikovs?"

"Uhm... never seen forks with round magazines". 

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 20:16 | 2437918 NoClueSneaker
NoClueSneaker's picture

Saiga forks, plz ....

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:15 | 2437062 Nobody For President
Nobody For President's picture

Before it gets buried by all the Star Trek Geeks (It's dead, Jim): I liked the Bankia ATM one as well with MERDE taking cover.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:13 | 2437040 PoliticalRefuge...
PoliticalRefugeefromCalif.'s picture

Wait until "the running of the banks" hits Pamplona...

guess it's no big deal until it's BOA eh?-might want to keep some cash under the mattress kids.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:12 | 2437032 Convolved Man
Convolved Man's picture

Jim, everyone I've questioned emphatically believes the whale we seek was at the JPMorgan.  What I find most interesting, is they are all here seeking slips of paper called "Euros".

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:09 | 2437027 sgt_doom
sgt_doom's picture

It’s Called Simple Arithmetic

$17 trillion

Between 2007 to 2009 American households lost $17 trillion in wealth and equity (as explained by Alan Kreuger awhile back).

$17 trillion

Between 2007 to 2009 the approximate amount pumped out to banks, private banks and corporations --- both in America and throughout the planet --- was $17 trillion.

The breakdown:  $16.1 trillion from the Federal Reserve directly; $750 billion in TARP bailout funds, plus the costs paid out to various hedge funds, such as Blackrock, and Wall Street-affiliated law firms to oversee and manage those bailout funds ($150 billion).

Among American households:  loss of jobs, loss of savings, loss of value in 401(k)s, loss of home and real estate value, followed by loss of credit to small businesses and companies, resulting in further loss of jobs, etc.

$17 trillion equals $17 trillion.

Simple arithmetic.

[Official Disclaimer:  Some economists would argue that all the credit extended by the bailout funds, and the Federal Reserve pumping, was paid back, but the recent GAO report detailing how banks accessed other government funds to repay those TARP funds renders such assertions highly problematical.]
Recommended reading:  Local Dollars, Local Sense  by Michael Shuman

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:02 | 2437003 GCT
GCT's picture

Captain Kirk:  "Spock I need an analysis of this situation."

Spock:  I will need to anaylze this situation further Captain but it appears this barbaric society uses their banks to store toilet paper."  


Thu, 05/17/2012 - 15:44 | 2436932 gojam
gojam's picture

Brilliant WB7!

I love the original Star Trek (best ever IMO)

I suspect Spock would think it was illogical that this hadn't happened earlier.

I'm really curious, I can just see that you've inserted a patch (I can only just see it) on Spock's lapel, what did you edit out, if you don't mind me asking ?

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 15:53 | 2436966 fourchan
fourchan's picture

kirk, "this is a bank line"

spock "no captian it appears the greek line is now for a slice of bread"

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 15:37 | 2436905 lakecity55
lakecity55's picture

"Spock, what's 'cash' and "gold'?"

"I am not sure, Captain. It looks, however , like the  DiLithium Crystal Panic on Kantos-7, in the Europa System."

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 15:32 | 2436870 Joebloinvestor
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"They are gonna shit eggrolls when they find out we beamed up everything of value Captain".

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:36 | 2436561 mantrid
mantrid's picture

"You will be hyperinflated. Resistance is futile"

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:31 | 2436533 blindman
blindman's picture

The Day After Mardi Gras Day - Alex McMurray
They All Ask'd For You (HD)

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:31 | 2436532 I am on to you
I am on to you's picture

I think SETI aint working here,cant compute these humans!


Why dont they change to a Dimon standard,its rare and its brilliant.

Cant figure these guys out,few days ago,a piece of glas was sold to an unknown Human for millions of dollars,a piece of glas,which has value to Whom?

 Cant whipe your sorry arse, with a Dimon!

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:29 | 2436518 UP4Liberty
UP4Liberty's picture
How well does the Fed protect the purchasing value of the dollar? *Texas Straight Talk, by Congressman Ron Paul, May 14, 2012:

''First, it is important to understand the Federal Reserve System.  Some people claim it is a secret cabal of elite bankers, while others claim it is part of the federal government.  In reality it is a bit of both.  The Federal Reserve System is the collusion of big government and big business to profit at the expense of taxpayers.  The Fed's bailout of large banks during the financial crisis propped up poorly-run corporations that should have gone under, giving them a market-distorting advantage that no business in the United States should receive.  The recent news about JP Morgan is a case in point.  JP Morgan, a recipient of $25 billion in bailout money, recently announced it lost another $2 billion.  If a corporation shows itself to be a bottomless money pit of 'errors, sloppiness and bad judgment,' the Fed shouldn't have expected $25 billion in free money to change that or teach anyone a lesson in fiscal discipline.  But it determined that this form of deliberate capital destruction was preferable to one business suffering bankruptcy.''

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:32 | 2436539 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

Yes, it is located at the intersection of Shit and Shinola Streets.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:36 | 2436558 Michael
Michael's picture

I can't help it William, I just have to click open your thread, I can't stop myself. LOL.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 16:05 | 2436471 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

            Spock:    Captain, it appears they actually give their hard earned wages over to these things called banks ,who replace them with electronic digits. The bankers in  turn risk their  wages on fantastic bets using vehcles that don't really exist.

Captain: How do I get a pice of the action?

Spock:   You get this little card that has MBA after your name.

Captain : Screw the prime directive , Scotty beam us up and set phasers on kill.  We can't let a predator life form this stupid loose in the galaxy. 

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:15 | 2436428 Flocking swans
Flocking swans's picture

OPEN CAPTION: Spock: 'withdrawing one's funds from the bank seems highly illogical.'

Kirk 'But Spock, the banks debt is multiplying faster than a pack of Tribbles.'  

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:10 | 2436401 WALLST8MY8BALL
WALLST8MY8BALL's picture

 dese guys Blankfeind and Dimon want to take over the Whole Ball of Wax! Lets get some heaters and rub em out!

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:05 | 2436380 El Oregonian
El Oregonian's picture

Attack of the GIANT EUROBOTS!!!

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:08 | 2436397 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture

Dude bank RUNS and not a single Diarrhea related pic?

You could have pulled one of those marathon runners losing control of their bowls while headed toward the bank.

So many twisted ideas to play with.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:11 | 2436411 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

My humor doesn't automatically run in that direction.

Thu, 05/17/2012 - 14:21 | 2436483 Gully Foyle
Gully Foyle's picture


It just did.

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