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Ben Bernanke's eHarmony Profile

Submitted by wallstreetfool on 05/13/2013 17:21 -0400

Name: Ben Joseph Bernanke

Nicknames: BenaddictedToPrinting, Benny In For A Penny, Homo Thug

Age: Out of Paper - Load MOAR Paper - 0101010101

Born: Great Depression

Religion: Keynesianity and Printalam

About Me:

I'm a selfish prick. A hot, rich, pampered intellectual with a big dick and a marathon tongue. I'm young enough to do it often and old enough to do it right. I don't have time for petty drama or emotional hysterics. I do what I want, when I want.

Activities/Interests:

I like to slice a papaya in half and stare at it for hours
I'm sexually aroused by war documentaries

What Am I Looking For In A Woman?

I'm looking for a woman that I can Print; wrap her around my D*ck and jerk-off for QEternity

(Source: wallstreetfool.com)

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Mon, 05/13/2013 - 19:37 | 3558534 dogbreath

Wallstreetfool

I didn't find this bit funny at all. Sorry The Blankfein bit was marginal as well

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:44 | 3558359 PiltdownMan

Genital Ben.

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:38 | 3558340 bubblemania

It costs me $250 to by toilet paper and other essentials at BJ's yesterday that will last my family a few weeks and $75 to fill up my Volvo. Fuck You Bernanke!

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:16 | 3558254 Eric L. Prentis

Farce? Yes, I love farce, especially “Ben Bernanke's eHarmony Profile”

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:05 | 3558210 fonzannoon

I don't know but if we are going main stream someone just stuck their dick in the mashed potato's at the coming out party.

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:10 | 3558230 wallstreetfool

Why So Serious ??? First of all, ZeroHedge is a mainstream blog; if you've been living under the delusion that you're part of an elite breed of Traders/Banksters/Illuminati, you're in for a rude awakening...Secondly, mashed patato's is too soft... How bout ZH's dick hit the 3rd rail....

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:13 | 3558239 fonzannoon

The 3rd rail may be a good comparison.

I don't think I am elite, and I have no doubt I am delusional at this point.

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 17:47 | 3558114 fonzannoon

Wow maybe this site is falling apart. WTF is this?

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 17:59 | 3558180 RebelDevil

what is it? monday humor

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:50 | 3558376 Bullionaire

"what is it? monday humor"

ATTEMPT at humor. Missed the dart board, missed the wall.

Tylers, time to restrict access.

Mon, 05/13/2013 - 18:08 | 3558222 The Heart

This is obviously a pure distraction to express just how freaking bass-ackwards insane things are in the un-real world. It is like Disneyland, and the ever changing motion picture is morphing out of control into unknown waters. Aye, they be dark waters there mates, and here fer yer entertainment purposes, a la-la movie about some kind of future. Just for fun of course.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eym4PwHmUvI

And if that is not enough, try finding this movie for fun.:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfWbADs2IvQ

Blah-blah-blah-blah...distractions a'la galore.

Ben Bernanke's eHarmony Profile

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