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Potato Juice Just Got Upped

Pivotfarm's picture


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The world has changed immensely and there were once things that were sacrilegiously respected. But, that’s no longer the case. The Chinese were always the baddies ready to overrun us and the dangers came from the East behind the Iron Curtain that had been drawn, leaving the Russians in the dark, while the West went on living the high-life as if it were the roaring twenties still. Now we know that was all a lie. It’s the USA that spies on people while the Chinese criticize the lack of democracy in our shamelessly hopeless quest for an image and a place in the expanding world that is leaving little room for us as we elbow and vie for a place amongst the crowd. The Russians were once notorious drunks, boozing on the potato juice like Bob Marley on weed on a summer’s day where there was no woman, no cry. Now, that is set to change. The Russian government has suddenly come to the conclusion that alcohol is bad for your health and they need to cut down on the hangover treatment. Once upon a time it was if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. Now, the Russians are following suit and burning age-old traditions of vodka boozers, bringing them in line with prohibitionist tea-totalers.

That’s the idea anyhow!

Vodka prices set to increase

Vodka prices set to increase


  • Vodka is set to increase in price between January 2014 and August that same year by at least 30%.
  • That means that the cheapest vodka on sale in Russia will go from 170 rubles to 200 on January 1st 2014.
  • It will then increase to 220 rubles in August 2014.
  • That’s the equivalent of $6.65.
  • There is also talk of actually increasing the legal age to purchase alcohol in Russia (which currently stands at 18 years of age) to 21 years of age.
  • According to recent studies that have been carried out alcohol consumption is actually waning in Russia and has been for a number of years now.
  • However, there are some 30% of deaths that are linked every year to alcohol consumption and abuse.
  • The average age of Russian males is 62.8 today and only 76.1 for females.
  • Russia has a surprisingly large disparity between males and females (in fact, the largest in the world).
  • The World Health Organization says that this is primarily due to alcohol consumption.
  • Annual per-capita consumption of alcohol stands at 15.76 liters.
  • 0.4% of the population died from accidental alcohol poisoning in 2012. But, the number of deaths linked as a primary or secondary source to alcohol in Russia is estimated to be much greater.

Remember Boris Yeltsin was asked to be the ambassador for Evian, the drinking water. He declined. Had he accepted he would have made a mint! People love iconic figures that don’t have anything to do with the brand they are selling and Boris probably didn’t touch a drop of the stuff (i.e. water!).

But, to what extent will making alcohol more expensive actually eradicate the problem. Don’t people continue smoking when the prices go up? Don’t they just end up buying their smokes on the black market? Increasing the price of alcohol in Russia was tested in 2010, but it just meant that people started distilling their own vodka in the back bedrooms of their apartments in Russia. That just leads to uncontrollable dangers and even greater problems.

The proof of the pudding will be in the eating (or rather the drinking, in this particular case). We shall see if there will be no woman, no cry. No vodka, no boozing.

Will the Russians be crying over their vodka?

Will the Russians be crying over their vodka?

Maybe Bob Marley was right after all when he sang:

Said said

Said I remember when we used to sit

In the government yard in Trenchtown

Oba, ob-serving the hypocrites

As they would mingle with the good people we meet

Good friends we have had, oh good friends we've lost along the way

In this bright future you can't forget your past

So dry your tears I say

He’s was pretty visionary even back then; he got the first syllable of the President rightat least “Oba, ob-serving the hypocrites’. It’s the weed that must have made him predict the future. Good on ya, Bob. The future might be bright, but we always forget the past.

The Russians will be doing cold Turkey with their price increases on the sale of Vodka.

Will it lead to a change in the consumption habits of the masses? Doubtful! You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, they always used to say, didn’t they? Does that still stand?

ribe to get what you wanted?

Originally posted: Potato Juice Just Got Upped

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Fri, 12/06/2013 - 23:25 | Link to Comment Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

 So we're all Vodka connoisseurs®  Of cheap diamonds and shit?

   This wood chuk world is doomed!

Sat, 12/07/2013 - 03:24 | Link to Comment mt paul
mt paul's picture

Woodchuck flavored vodka....

Fri, 12/06/2013 - 23:24 | Link to Comment TyrannoSoros Wrecks
TyrannoSoros Wrecks's picture

"The Russians were once notorious drunks"

WERE? as in not any more?

  • The average age of Russian males is 62.8 today and only 76.1 for females.
  • Russia has a surprisingly large disparity between males and females (in fact, the largest in the world).

    UMM WAT?
    and UMM WAT? again

  • Fri, 12/06/2013 - 21:52 | Link to Comment Iam_Silverman
    Iam_Silverman's picture

    Vodka, bitches.


    Sorry, but someone had to say it.....

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 15:45 | Link to Comment ebworthen
    ebworthen's picture

    A lot of modern vodkas are made from corn, wheat, rye, and other ingredients.

    Potatoes are kind of expensive, though maybe cheaper in Russia.

    The Ethanol/Corn Lobby stupidity hasn't helpd Vodka prices in the U.S. because a lot of our brands are corn based.

    You can make vodka and other spirits with just about any ferment-able sugar. 

    Of course, if the price hikes/levies are on the finished product it won't matter if it is made from potatoes or grapes.

    Stupid idea, unless they raise taxes that specifically go toward treating liver disease and other related over-indulgence diseases - which would mean drinkers are pre-paying for healthcare they may need - but you can't trust government to set aside money like that.

    It will just piss people off and make them want to join the Euro, or the Yuan.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:33 | Link to Comment Poofter Priest
    Poofter Priest's picture



    Vodka gone.


    Now...vhat ve do about moose and squirrel?

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:03 | Link to Comment Trampy
    Trampy's picture

    The average age of Russian males is 62.8 today and only 76.1 for females.

    No Way José!

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:01 | Link to Comment HerrDoktor
    HerrDoktor's picture


    Yeah, our family used to bootleg liquor in western Ukraine when the Tsar (the real Russian Tsar, not some ObamaPOS poser Tsar) tried to maintain a monopoly on alcohol production.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:13 | Link to Comment Redneck Hippy
    Redneck Hippy's picture

    Looks like they need to outlaw copper tubing sales.  Moonshine sales ramping up in the good old USSR.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 12:54 | Link to Comment Winston Smith 2009
    Winston Smith 2009's picture

    What a BS article.  

    The Russians still have a huge alcohol abuse problem and probably will for many, many years to come. I've heard many modern Russians say it and one look at their thousands of dashcam videos on YouTube will confirm that.  It's appartently a traditional part of their culture. 

    And we're the bad guys because we spy as every other nation would if they could, and the Chinese complain about our particular farce of a democracy as if their's was better instead of much worse?

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 21:50 | Link to Comment Iam_Silverman
    Iam_Silverman's picture

    "And we're the bad guys because we spy as every other nation would if they could,"

    No, we're the bad guys because we spy on them while we're sober.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 10:28 | Link to Comment Orwell was right
    Orwell was right's picture

    Pivot Farm doesn't know dick about Russia...

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 10:09 | Link to Comment HFBondsTrader
    HFBondsTrader's picture
    • The average age of Russian males is 62.8 today and only 76.1 for females.

    how is that possibly true?

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:27 | Link to Comment Trampy
    Trampy's picture

    The average age of Russian males is 62.8 today and only 76.1 for females.

    how is that possibly true?

    I think the real question is, how could a non-drunk person possibly write such a line?

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 15:50 | Link to Comment ebworthen
    ebworthen's picture

    Average age or life expectancy?

    I think he meant life expectancy.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 11:02 | Link to Comment RaceToTheBottom
    RaceToTheBottom's picture

    Certainly some infantile writing skills on display.

    I am thinking it is the average age of death, but even with that it needs work.

    Sat, 12/07/2013 - 02:00 | Link to Comment Dr Benway
    Dr Benway's picture

    Some things were sacrilegiously respected

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 12:50 | Link to Comment TheFourthStooge-ing
    TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

    Pivotfarm should sober up before writing.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 10:34 | Link to Comment SimplePrinciple
    SimplePrinciple's picture

    That caught my eye, too.  He must mean that men, on average, live to age 62.8, while the average female lives to age 76.1.  One could check it if he would cite a source.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 11:29 | Link to Comment frankTHE COIN
    frankTHE COIN's picture

    Either it's that or we are looking at a Hugh Cougar nation.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 12:55 | Link to Comment Colonel Klink
    Colonel Klink's picture

    Sorry by that age it's no longer cougar, it's tomcat.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 15:51 | Link to Comment ebworthen
    ebworthen's picture


    Sat, 12/07/2013 - 00:01 | Link to Comment willwork4food
    willwork4food's picture

    Possible RICH prunecats...

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 10:08 | Link to Comment SubjectivObject
    SubjectivObject's picture

    Have you seen those yute oob dash cam videos of car crashes?  A lot seem to be Russian or East European origin.  Aside from some relativley uncontrolled major looking intersections, the only thing that explains most of the bad car/truck behaviour is inebriation behind the wheel.  Some epic life ending events on display there.

    As an aside, parents would do well to initiate their new driver in the family with these car crash videos.  The dynamics of out of control vehicles is both educational, and sobering.  The fun question becomes not merely what can you see, but what didn't you (or they) see coming.  Good for motivating situational awareness in bicyclist and pedestrians too.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 09:41 | Link to Comment orangegeek
    orangegeek's picture

    Vodka has now become a huge export for the Ruskies.  They do make great vodka.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 08:45 | Link to Comment HastaLaVista
    HastaLaVista's picture

    Sure, and all of us also play balalayka and dancing with bears on snowy streets of Moskva :) You really overvalue the importance of vodka for 99% of Russian population. Better ask people from Baltics, Finland and Sweden.




    Pivotfarm, please... NO... PLEASE stop this BS about the country you simply dont know. Just because everyone from Russia after reading your articles will never trust to anything published on ZeroHedge pages.


    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 13:08 | Link to Comment HerrDoktor
    HerrDoktor's picture

    Privyet from my bear to yours.  Na zdorovye!


    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 09:45 | Link to Comment gmrpeabody
    gmrpeabody's picture

    Boris..., is that you?

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 14:10 | Link to Comment FrankDrakman
    FrankDrakman's picture

    Am much missing Boris.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 08:39 | Link to Comment hawk nation
    hawk nation's picture

    Sounds like Russia is in need of a countrywide AA program coupled with a lot of education

    Sun, 12/08/2013 - 12:47 | Link to Comment Milestones
    Milestones's picture

    Disagree!!! Send the Russkies all our little miss goodie two shoes. There is your guananteed revolution.                Milestones

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 08:38 | Link to Comment Big Boss Man
    Big Boss Man's picture

    Bootlegging will certainly be waaaay up.
    Remember the poison vodka kiosks in Poland and the Czech Republic a couple of years ago? Rerun.
    My wife escaped what was then Czechoslovakia in 1968, on a collage school trip to Vienna.
    As a child, she delivered hooch that her mom made in her apartment, on bicycles. She knew which policemen she could just share some of the product with and which she would have to race to a bridge to jettison the load.
    Same thing is happening with tobacco here in the USA.
    I buy pipe tobacco in Pennsylvania for $15.00 a lb. and get about 500 cigs out of it. Winds up costing about $.75 a pack.
    People become MacGyvers when things get tight, or over-regulated.

    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 07:51 | Link to Comment Popo
    Popo's picture

    First step to ensuring violent overthrow of the government:   Take away booze.



    Fri, 12/06/2013 - 14:11 | Link to Comment FrankDrakman
    FrankDrakman's picture

    Certainly worked in 1919, didn't it?

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