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Transcendence
Transcendence
By
Cognitive Dissonance
It’s a simple enough word and one that should be familiar. A quick check of an online dictionary reveals an obvious definition, especially when we consider the root word ‘transcend’. “Exceeding or surpassing in degree or excellence” and “to triumph over the negative or restrictive aspects of; to overcome”. Simple……right?
From the very beginning, well before I selected Cognitive Dissonance to represent my online personality and certainly before Tyler plucked me from the Zero Hedge peanut gallery (aka the comment section) and offered me the opportunity to become a ZH contributor, my one and only desire when I wrote was to add perspective, to offer up what I thought was a bigger picture point of view. That purpose remains just as pronounced today as it ever was. But I feel stronger headwinds than normal buffeting me and the collective anger and loathing is rising, dangerously in my view.
But please don’t be mistaken. Not for one moment do I consider myself the Oracle from Delphi, nor some wise and giving man here to shower you with wisdom and healing. Not in the least. What I’m actually doing is simple and in many ways self serving. I’m faking it until I make it with the hope that if I give away something that I don’t really feel is fully within me, that I may further develop my empathy, compassion and perspective muscles, that I may grow stronger by offering to others what I feel lacking in myself.
This concept, my method, isn’t as counter intuitive as it might seem at first blush. Of course I am quite capable of empathy and perspective. The problem isn’t necessarily a lack of ability, but rather at times a lack of desire. You see……I was, and can still be, a very angry man. A very, very angry man. And it was slowly killing me. It wasn’t an epiphany that compelled me to begin to look within, but rather raw unbridled desperation to find something, anything, that would relieve my inner anguish and pain.
The thing was that at first I didn’t realize how much pain I was in. All I saw was my all consuming anger and indignation, righteous indignation in fact, the worst kind because it ‘allowed’ me to wallow in my own self pity while nursing my hurt ego. How dare those bastards ……… fill in the blank, there are plenty of outrages to choose from. ‘They’ were subverting the American Dream and hurting me and my own in the process. It was horrible and glorious at the same time. No critical thinking needed, just point and shoot both barrels at once. But over time it was eating me alive from the inside, and I didn’t know what to do about it. Or even if I should.
The best analogy I can find of the damage done to myself by my slow burn anger is that it was similar to eating every meal at McDonalds. While our belly is full, it’s never really satisfying and we wind up feeling more and more out of sorts with each subsequent meal, somewhat sick to the stomach and bloated. Over time we grow fat and distorted on all those empty calories while simultaneously wasting away from the lack of quality nutrition. Keep it up long enough and we will degrade both physically and mentally, resulting in a shorter life span and a marked decrease in quality of life on the way to our early grave.
I could go on describing the fallout from my lingering dysfunction (yup, still there, though less so each day) but that’s not the purpose of this article. The point is to explain the measures I continue to embrace to overcome my issues and to warn my loyal readers that I am recognizing the same dysfunction in you. Zero Hedge has always been about letting go, of speaking truth to power and venting frustrations, of finding comfort when huddled with like minded others who share a common goal, to oust the corruption and return to a more fair and equitable social order.
The thing is that the longer the social order remains……well, disorderly……the more intense our inner personal dysfunction can become. But rather than believe that society is coming unglued because of the creeping (rushing is more like it) political and financial corruption, consider that the process is actually reversed, that as we personally come apart at the seams, so does our society which in turn pushes society’s dredges (aka sociopaths) to the top of the heap in the form of thieving bankers, abusive multinational corporations and too-numerous-to-count hanger-on’s, enablers and sycophants.
Regardless of whether you agree with my analysis of the source of the cancerous lesions or not, the purpose of this train of thought is not to be ‘right’, but to (re)gain our mental and emotional health and to make this our number one priority now and forever. Regardless of whether we feel we must ‘do’ something now (anything for God’s sake) or that it’s hopeless and futile (or more likely something in between) if our inner self, our essence, is not centered and at peace, at best we will be ineffective and at worst just a miserable person.
As well there is no going back, no unlearning or forgetting what we know, no return to blissful ignorance. In fact any attempt to go back to before, to forget all we know, will only feed our dysfunction and anger that much more. We cannot be plugged back into the Matrix, at least not without a frontal lobotomy. So let us acknowledge our inner madman and begin the process of self help and healing, then move forward individually and collectively.
02-17-2014
Cognitive Dissonance
Introducing a new portal into the mind of Cognitive Dissonance www.TwoIceFloes.com
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I was hoping to find a solution to my anger. No such luck.
Write.
Speaking of writing... any news from the girls?
I've been too busy to keep up with them much. I'm not hearing anything in the newspaper recently about mysterious rampages, spontaneous combustion or UFOs so I figure they are staying out of trouble.
Just the calm before the storm, of course. They'll get bored and then --yes -- it will have to be written.
There is no magic button to push or pill to take. We are all very unique individuals and we are speaking about an extremely emotional issue. While you and I may share anger or frustration about certain specific things, our emotional triggers are composed of a lifetime of experience and are most certainly very different, thus what works for me will most likely not work for you except on maybe the surface and only for a short while.
Drugs suppress nearly the entire emotional spectrum. What you and I must do is to get to the root of our own personal dysfunction and clear out the cob webs and debris. Essentially we must deprogram ourselves because many of the emotions we are experiencing are the result of years, decades, of social programing and propaganda now being called into question. We feel betrayed and that is an extremely complex emotional response and one only we as individuals can ultimate root out.
I realize there is no magic button and I don't take meds.
You have written a great article and your reply to my comment is insightful.
I'm just a bit tired of my anger and frustrated by my lack of success in controlling it. It is ruining my life.
I have virtually everything I have ever wanted. Beautiful wife, big house on a nice chunk of property (no mortgage), great kids, good job, alot of money in the bank. No real worries...but I'm pissed. I think I know why, but knowing doesn't seem to help.
If I could deprogram myself I would.
I realize there is no magic button and I don't take meds.
You have written a great article and your reply to my comment is insightful.
I'm just a bit tired of my anger and frustrated by my lack of success in controlling it. It is ruining my life.
I have virtually everything I have ever wanted. Beautiful wife, big house on a nice chunk of property (no mortgage), great kids, good job, alot of money in the bank. No real worries...but I'm pissed. I think I know why, but knowing doesn't seem to help.
If I could deprogram myself I would.
Ironmaan - I wonder if your lack of satisfaction comes from a limited scope of dreams. Getting the family and being in a comfy place is good no doubt but consid setting a new goal that requires service alongside other people a couple hours a week.
You may merely have unused potential. My biggest fear in this life is boredom, so it compels me at times to take risks. Meeting new people requires a little taste of risk for a lot of reward. A lot of parents have had to work harder to keep it all together. Woman seem more natural at making friends, more social. For us men it doesnt always come naturally and added pressure to perform to keep a nice place can limit time and we may forget how to make friends. I hope this general suggestions help.
Sorry to hear you are in pain. Pain can be a true motivator or it can be a depressant.
For decades I allowed my pain to be a depressant. One day I decided I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Then the real pain started. But this new pain is just growing pains and I know they will eventually diminish greatly or maybe even stop. The old pain was never going to stop.
I'm in a better place now.
Yes, been there, glad I'm back.
i would sugest that one/you/whoever research the traits: Histrionic, Narcissism and Antisocial. then upon diagnosis, knowledge, you can act towards the discovery of the underlying issues from your upbring (ussualy) and move towards forgiving(letting go) and make lasting ammends that will flush this anger out of you. true forgiveness...
it aint easy stuff.
No, it isn't easy. The journey back from self defeating anger is long. I have made great strides through the years and am happy. I still struggle with this at times and continue to grow out of it. Thanks for your insights.
I used to be extremely angry. I adopted a dog. Now I am slightly less angry. No sarcasm here. It helped. I would recommend it to anyone, fwiw.
"I used to be extremely angry. I adopted a dog. Now I am slightly less angry. No sarcasm here. It helped. I would recommend it to anyone, fwiw."
Yeah. Feral cats.
Nothing has made me feel closer to God than to take out the tweezers and pick every last flea off a frightened miserable stinking squirming little wild beast.
-Or, maybe it's the merciless killing by hand of the hundreds of fleas that actually makes me feel so good.
Yin & Yang and all...go figure...
True enough. I've almost always owned one or two dogs. Nearly all have been adopted from some source or another and they've all turned out to be great buddies. Each of them has taught me one lesson or another. Only thing is.... they don't live long enough. It's tough seeing them leave.
Just got back from doing what helps keep me sane.
It's -15ºC here.
My son and I cycled to one of our favourite spots and hiked in the snow and trees for about 3 hours.
Back for a good home-cooked meal and a couple of beers.
I gave up TV 15 years ago. Gave up driving nearly 4 years ago (cycle almost everywhere these days - within 20 miles anyway). Never owned a cell phone (likely never will). Out of the banking situation as much as possible - credit union and no credit card or debt.
The less I have to do with the 'system' the better I feel.
Hoping to go off grid soon, working on it.
My son and I enjoy archery and I have taken up bow making - been making my own arrows for a while now.
I still struggle with the madness I'm forced to be part of, but all of the above make it bearable.
When I speak of withdrawing from the (Ponzi) system I am talking about withdrawing financially, physically, spiritually and emotionally. Just as you are speaking to with your comment. Some I do better than others and some more consistently than others. But each day I do something along those lines.
Progress, not perfection.
Soon you will be demonized as the Withdrawers.
If lunatics call you sane, you do have a REAL problem.
We try to be careful. I haven't even told my Mom yet that Cog's not a Republican lol. /sarc/
To me, the final level of political growth is panarchism.
Divesting yourself completely of the desire to politically control others.
must be quite a chunk of change lost to cause this behavior change. Hv u met Gerald Levin?
When CD starts publishing again, you know it's time to put the shorts back on. Thanks CD.
Mrs. Cog wants to know if you mean short pants or short stocks? I ain't gonna even hazard a guess. :)
<And does this mean I currently have my short pants off (now why would that be?) or am I the (contrarian) signal for a market top?> :)
When did we start wearing pants around here? I must have missed that memo.
I got the memo about the pants. But no one said going commando was a no no.........so....... :)
One of your best, CD, but I do sense that over time you'll be writing more on this.
All roads eventually lead there.
i have learned there are two types-givers and takers. i just wish to give something back.
keep giving your talents as they are far greater than mine(articulating, writing your understanding of humans and how/why they interact). i observed how i for sure did not want to be as a person - assholes teach many valuable lessons.
spending twenty some years working with people and getting to know each of them for 8-10 months was valuable insight. you add so much more and allow me to tie many loose ends of observation into understanding.
"We the People" are so very different and yet so similar.
I suspect, but am not sure, that one of the reason we are so similar is that for the most part our cultural conditioning is nearly identical, at least those from the same country/region. The differences are in how we trigger to different stimuli.
Most of my observations about humans comes from people watching. And the person I have watched the most is me.
Prescriptions on Transcendance :
1) Rid yourself of TV
2) Rid yourself of medications
3) Uphold the 2nd amendment
4) Protect the weak
5) Cherish life
alter the diet, reduce meat, elimate sugary drinks, processed foods, fast foods...prepare your own food.
Show no respect to those who are contemptible.
Offer help to those deserving of help.
Avoid those whose word is meaningless.
You could be wrong ... you could be right.
Best of luck with new beginnings.
I love the lines of this song.
transcendence = blue pill
How so?
For one thing the vast majority of blue pillers that I know are into things like trancendence.
But more importantly it is precisely about the anger. CD may imagine himself as Carradine as Kung Fu, but I think that a Buddist type solution leads to blue pill nirvana. Just consider how much freedom buddism brought the peasants over the millenia.
Thats the thing about the blue pill, once you take it never know you took it and you can't go back.
From within his transendential trance "Cog" is unable to discuss reality and acknowledge the truth. Enjoy your "enlightened" enslavement.
Our system is truly perverse
Our greed and corruption a curse
The Kleptos may rule us
But don't let them fool us
Despair will make everything worse
Always on point LK. Thank you for the verses.
"They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved." (Source: 2 Peter 2:19)
The process feels to me so much like grief, the longer I live with it. The shock, the anger, the bargaining ("Please let me forget!") -- but your work makes me feel less alone. Thank you.
//Having lived with anger for parental abuse and a spouse who had some growing up to do, I learned it is not necessary to forget. It is wise to remember but not let the sickening facts control who you are or how you chose to live your life. It is true, "forgiveness is a gift you give yourself." Allowing yourself to love and live in spite of the failures, intentional or not, is freeing. Remembering others can cause problems for you is wise. Being aware means you can be prepared.
Realising we cannot control everything that affects us is also wise. For believers I include my mantra, "Let go and let God."
Note to CD, thank you for your thought provoking pieces, I look forward to many more.
"Note to CD, thank you for your thought provoking pieces, I look forward to many more."
Mrs Cog has me chained to the computer. So there will be moar coming. :)
As I develop my own website further one of the features I wish to regularly contribute to is a section yet to be created on how to cope with being one of the few who sees more than the others, the outsider, the contrarian, the rebel, the loner.
The emotional roller coaster can be devastating and in the process marriages, relationships, employment and sanity can all be disastrously affected. Unfortunately very few people are addressing this subject for whatever reasons. I wish to change that.
Back in 2011 I posted two articles, a series really, called "Dispatches from Occupied Territory - The Awakening" and "Dispatches from Occupied Territory - Of Open Minds and Closed People" that speaks to your concerns.
Why don't you read them starting with "The Awakening.
Thanks for writting this CD. I have for one let me anger at the world affect me in terrible ways, turning to drugs to dull my mind and letting the relationship with the love of my life flounder. I've turned a corner in the last few months. It can be done. I could go from absolute contempt of people, their ignorance, greed, common foibles. Then to pure compassion, love and heeling all in the same day. It's a disastrous 'roller coaster' as you put it. One must find focus and unity within one's Self. I found this through a yoga practice and I recommend trying this for all the zerohedgers out there still on the roller coaster. I'm also much heathier and, for those who still need convincing, it's the best damn thing you could possibly do for your sex life. I fuck like Tyler Durden.
We really only have two choices when we come to this fork in the road. Either we surrender to the machine and just go with the flow while trying to suppress what we know, meaning we surrender to the madness and re-enter the insane asylum, or we find a way to live with the knowledge without allowing it to destroy ourselves.
I choose life outside the insanity.
There is just something about leaving 'civilization' behind... being outdoors and experiencing nature in the present moment as it envelopes all of your focus and your senses that calms the soul.
It is the only place in an insane world where everything makes sense.
Here's to the trees...
no drugs here(20 some plus years), but i lost a career i truly loved (selling new homes-custom) to a bubble. i vowed never to be so so foolish again. I did foolish things ignoring the obvious-shame on me!
the anger has turned to fully understanding people not like me(where my understanding lead me). my compassion and honesty is pale in comparrison to what I have learned. how could such people do as they do and be revered as honest people and leaders?
yes i goes away a day at a time...
the fucking bastards :) ahhhh...
thanks from my heart!
Your articles serve the function of making me focus on my own breathing. Like you, I tend to hyperventilate when confronted with the oncoming train of "media" reporting.
Oh, my! What will [insert current popular personality here] do about [insert latest stupid antic here]. Even ZH in general is a site where the hogs are slopped daily. Hard to be picky about the news diet when all that's offered is swill.
Your work causes me to slow down and take a broad view of things. Thanks again.
Thank you.
The thing is that most of my writing is simply me talking to myself. I am working out these things in real time as I write them down. I am not very eloquent nor do I have a very good vocabulary and I certainly don't have the answers, just more questions.
What I think resonates with many people here on Zero Hedge is that they hear the pain and struggle in my 'voice'. And they also hear the growing peace and happiness that I am finding within. Both my readership and I are finding ourselves together.
Ultimately we are all alone, at least in the physical/mental sense. But meeting here on ZH and talking about things most people would never dream of discussing in public, let alone to themselves, is helping all of us to work through this in real time.
This is why I say that the real value of my article is not in the posting itself, but in the comment section below.