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First Horse(meat) Trading, Now 59% Of "Tuna" Sold In The U.S. Isn’t Tuna

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Submitted by Michael Krieger of Liberty Blitzkrieg blog,

 

New Study Shows 59% of “Tuna” Sold in the U.S. Isn’t Tuna

 

 

This is just the latest revelation in the stealth inflation and food fraud theme I have written about frequently in recent months.  The non-profit group Oceana took samples of 1,215 fish sold in the U.S. and genetic tests found that that 59% of those labeled tuna were mislabeled.

 

It seems that “white tuna” should be avoided in particular as “84% of fish samples labeled “white tuna” were actually escolar, a fish that can cause prolonged, uncontrollable, oily anal leakage.”

 

Oh and if you live in my hometown of New York City, you should pay particular attention:

Big Apple has big problem with seafood fraud:  94 percent of tuna and more than three quarters of sushi samples in New York City mislabeled.

 

Of the 142 fish samples collected in New York, 39 percent were mislabeled. New York City led the nation with the highest occurrence of mislabeled salmon as well as the highest amount of fraud among salmon collected from grocery stores and restaurants.

The full report from Oceana can be found here.

Bon appétit!

 

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Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:25 | 3294276 americanspirit
americanspirit's picture

Now will you please stop feeding tuna to your cat? That's not 'spraying" that's prolonged uncontrolled oily anal leakage. But, it does attract other cats.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:08 | 3294841 indygo55
indygo55's picture

Brings up the question; So what then is in cat food?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:26 | 3294278 dick cheneys ghost
dick cheneys ghost's picture

Gives a whole new meaning to......''tongue punch my fartbox'

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:54 | 3294338 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

(+1) god bless you for 'keeping it alive'...

~~~

Muchos kudos... [ht/ SCRO]

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:27 | 3294280 mantrid
mantrid's picture

huh, one day we learn officialy 80% dollars were mislabelled and then what?

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 08:52 | 3295087 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Just avoid serial numbers that were used to buy t-bills.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 16:49 | 3295884 mt paul
mt paul's picture

economic leakage..

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:27 | 3294281 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

"It seems that “white tuna” should be avoided in particular as “84% of fish samples labeled “white tuna” were actually escolar, a fish that can cause prolonged, uncontrollable, oily anal leakage.”

And here I've been thinking that my constantly soiled skivvies were because I was worried about overhead drones, FEMA camps, Fukushima radiation, currency collapse, Gold and Silver confiscation and so on.

<Now I can abandon the butt plug simply by giving up my daily diet of tuna on rye.>

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:33 | 3294295 knukles
knukles's picture

Disturbing.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:37 | 3294306 nmewn
nmewn's picture

What...the tuna on rye or the butt plug? ;-)

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:45 | 3294318 Hulk
Hulk's picture

Ever use Tuna lube on a butt plug??? It can make things very confusing later on !!!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:13 | 3294396 knukles
knukles's picture

Now that's even more disturbing.
(And my standards are pretty damned low as it is...)

 

Tuna Lube?

 

(holy mackrel!)

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:22 | 3294422 McMolotov
McMolotov's picture

For those who like to get the cats involved in the action.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:25 | 3294430 msmith9962
msmith9962's picture

Isn't that what tuna in the can is?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:26 | 3294544 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

You can't tune a piano if you can't TUNA FISH... [turn some pages]...

~~~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGgLPriZUSA

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:54 | 3294342 LeisureSmith
LeisureSmith's picture

A fun read about this notorious assblaster and tuna inposter. Make sure to read the comments. 

Escolar: The World's Most Dangerous Fish

 

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:03 | 3294365 Rusty Diggins
Rusty Diggins's picture

oh damn! it's the ITIS!

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:22 | 3294858 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

Or you could just STOP shitting your pants? Clench those cheeks man!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:29 | 3294286 Sutton
Sutton's picture

Sardines, bitchez.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:32 | 3294445 Eternal Complainer
Eternal Complainer's picture

Long toilet paper bitchez!

..........

I thought I was making the right choices when I decided to drop 'ground anything' from my diet, considering the horse meat scandal.
I was content with the idea of just chicken fish and pork.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:00 | 3294501 scatterbrains
scatterbrains's picture

pork..  leads me to wonder what do they mean when they say that other white meat ?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:52 | 3294480 CPL
CPL's picture

http://www.undercurrentnews.com/2012/11/23/concerns-for-californian-sard...

Fish don't have Cesium radiation treatments or organised hospitals full of trained personelle.  Once the sardine collapse happens since it's a bait fish.  Nobody is exactly sure.  However the media is prepared by coaching the public on what they might be able to eat...maybe.

http://www.fishingfury.com/20061024/delicious-giant-jellyfish/

Because a filette of fried snot sounds appealing doesn't it.  Hopefully the sardines manage to outbreed the radiation but it's not something anyone has been hopeful on with the continued acidification of the ocean.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:36 | 3294304 goldenbuddha454
goldenbuddha454's picture

So next you're gonna tell me that caviar I just ate was actually food-colored tapioca?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:37 | 3294307 Winston of Oceania
Winston of Oceania's picture

Yeah, it's MOSTLY WATER!!  I'm starting a catfish farm...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:40 | 3294313 reader2010
reader2010's picture

Shit Burger Japanese Researcher Creates Artificial Meat From Human Feces

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fkFg-4Xh_I

 


Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:12 | 3294397 TNTARG
TNTARG's picture

After all we're omnivore, like racoons, crows and grizzlies!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:34 | 3294448 Decimus Lunius ...
Decimus Lunius Luvenalis's picture

What the fuck?  I just watched that video twice and the goal was to price shit-meat close to what regular fraud-meat costs.  So when you're shopping and you come to to the meat counter, you say to your wife, "Well the horse loin is $19.99/lb.  How much is the shit-steak honey?"  She says, "The shit-steak is $21.99 but it has less fat!"  The shit-steak it is!

Soylent Green is almost upon us. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:55 | 3294487 CPL
CPL's picture

Imported cheap packaged long pork products.  Dollar bacon.  Dollar flash frozen chops.  Flash frozen pork loins.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:43 | 3294658 reader2010
reader2010's picture

In an economic setup that is only interested in profit, or moeny is far more important than human needs,  does it make you wonder whether or not a society like ours is worthy of its existence. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:42 | 3294316 Monedas
Monedas's picture

One man's Spam is another mans canned salmon !      Monedas   1929       Comedy Jihad World Tour

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:36 | 3294569 akak
akak's picture

Having uttered the magical porcine word, you have automatically solicited yet another SPAMku:

 

SPAM--Jews won't touch it.
Muslims proclaim it unclean.
Wisdom of the East.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 05:53 | 3294993 Likstane
Likstane's picture

pinkish hue pressed out

gel covers chilled tasty dish

salmon takes back seat

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:51 | 3294330 TNTARG
TNTARG's picture

Let's trade "bitchez", from escolar to kids!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:54 | 3294339 SubjectivObject
SubjectivObject's picture

Ha!  Houston/Austin; 10/10 mislabled. 

But the left and right coasts catch the headliner.

Houston's the bottom coast, by the way.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:59 | 3294355 duo
duo's picture

I've caught and cleaned tuna in Cabo.  The "tuna" I've had so far in Dallas has been real.  I did have some questionable stuff in Austin.  If you don't live next to a big international airport, don't eat sushi.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 19:57 | 3294345 Wile-E-Coyote
Wile-E-Coyote's picture

Nothing is real anymore.

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:01 | 3294360 duo
duo's picture

sometime soon, we're going to hear that recycled human protein is in our food, passed off as some sort of soy/seaweed extract.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:13 | 3294401 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

What Do they do with all the crap they suck out of people's asses and belly's and such anyway?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:55 | 3294489 HulkHogan
HulkHogan's picture

They probably send it to dog food factories. Man's best friend eats man's fat ass.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:34 | 3294561 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Nope ~ Oldwood had it right... It goes straight to Tyler Durdens SOAP COMPANY...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:34 | 3294738 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

It might lather up all right but I bet it still smells like....ass!

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:01 | 3294769 CPL
CPL's picture

Spray it on crops.  It's manure.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:14 | 3294847 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

I believe CPL has just turned Rasta. Nice sky piece you're wearing in your new avatar.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:13 | 3294398 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

My misery seems pretty real.........

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:11 | 3294519 BurningFuld
BurningFuld's picture

That does not bode well then for the "This shits real" saying then.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:00 | 3294683 Crash Overide
Crash Overide's picture

"Nothing is real anymore."

 

One side note, Pedro's fish shack on the south end of the beach in Tamarindo Costa Rica where I watched the old man or his two sons pull in the net with an assortment Red Snapper, Mahi Mahi, Manta Ray, Shrimps, and Langostas which later determined the days menu. For one moment after a perfect session surfing Tamarindo Beach in between seasons where it's mostly the locals and random travelers, I ate my Mahi Mahi which was flopping around not but 45 mins ago as Pedro Jr. would tell stories. It felt as real as any hologram does. 

As far as seafood, I know I have had the "real" stuff as many times as I ate at Pedro's...

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 17:27 | 3295950 DosZap
DosZap's picture

Nothing is real anymore.

Except ObaMao's GUN GRAB, is all about taking them away BEFORE the Chinese come in and start owning/farming  mining our Federal Lands,because we will have to default on their debt.Seems like if the Chineee wanted to they could just buy it now?, but that would mean UST's would be cashed out...................Hmmm?

This is why China is #1 at the top of the list SCREAMING to disarm Americans.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:15 | 3294353 Fred Garvin
Fred Garvin's picture

In a related story, "after extensive testing, it was discovered that 99% of those in Washington who took an oath to defend the constitution, didn't"

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:01 | 3294358 A Lunatic
A Lunatic's picture

The Economic Recovery has been grossly mislabeled as well............

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:22 | 3294424 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Isn't it ironic in the most highly regulated city of New York such fraud could originate? Mayor Bloomberg to the rescue!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:49 | 3294473 akak
akak's picture

99% of all CNBC Bernanke cheerleading and stock pimping, and 100% of Paul Krugman's editorials, have been found to be uncontrolled anal leakage as well.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:08 | 3294840 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

akak: Did you just subliminally describe Wall Street roadside shitting?

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:56 | 3294882 akak
akak's picture

Woohoo!  Make me laugh!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:03 | 3294366 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

So should I worry that my fish oil pills are actually filled with BP surface skim?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:30 | 3294439 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Not at all, oil leakage from around BP holes is normal. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:35 | 3294564 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

test 'em on styrofoam for authenticity...

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:51 | 3294820 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Oh god I'm laughing so hard I'm about ready to hock up my dinner. Someone please work in a 99 cent chicken breast and I'm going to the hospital!

Miffed:-)

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 21:24 | 3296429 TheFourthStooge-ing
TheFourthStooge-ing's picture

99 cent Chicken of the Sea breasts.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:03 | 3294368 Smegley Wanxalot
Smegley Wanxalot's picture

Next thing you know they'll be saying the frog legs I eat are really made of chicken.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:30 | 3294440 Cathartes Aura
Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:36 | 3294570 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

only eat the legs of the frogs that jumped out of the pot before the water started to get hot...

~~~

My culinary gift 2 you...,

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:04 | 3294369 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Glad I stopped buying it when it became radioactive.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:02 | 3294772 CPL
CPL's picture

Imagine Kobe Beef.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:04 | 3294372 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

Now you got me jones'n for some ficticious fish fillets....on a cracker!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:06 | 3294375 cgnbob
cgnbob's picture

I have been laughing my ass off on the comments. There should be a ZH best of comments section.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:28 | 3294436 msmith9962
msmith9962's picture

Yeah, If I didnt have the comments to make me laugh at these stories I would be crying.  The other day someone said CNBC is chewing gum for the eyes, that's had me laughing for a while.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:06 | 3294378 negative rates
negative rates's picture

Nothing but whole wheat fish for me.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:25 | 3294429 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

I enjoy salmon force fed corn the most. Same for my beef! Corn fed cars, corn fed food supply, corn fed candy, cheese, and corn fed humans.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:35 | 3294449 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

don't forget cow fed corn candy!

With the wrappers on, no less. There’s a cattle producer (I hesitate to use “rancher”, because I think it means more than “producer”) in Kentucky that has begun feeding his cattle old, stale, unfit for human consumption candy because of the high price of corn feed. There’s a drought in the country right now affecting a large portion of the country which has affected corn crops. This has raised the cost of corn to cattle farmers. so, to combat this cost increase, one Kentucky farmer has begun to use old, stale candy — with the wrappers still on — to his cattle to fatten them up for slaughter. And yes, it works. His cows are putting on weight. And, apparently, everyone’s ok with this.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:07 | 3294381 the grateful un...
the grateful unemployed's picture

used to work in the business, and for most of these similar bottom fish, its all in the cut, halibut is flounder is.. most of what they're calling snapper is probably rock cod, the prevelant species in the PacNw and AK. i recently was looking at some Dover sole at the store, and in big letters it said WILD CAUGHT. i thought what the heck, i thought it was all WILD CAUGHT. and farm raised anything implies you know your product and you're not just fileting everything that comes up in the net regardless. so i see this DNA thing as more of a problem for open sea fisheries, than for farm raised. but isn't most tuna caught on a line? and while i won't buy farm raised shrimp, farm raised oysters are better, if only because the pollution danger is minimized. my point may be proven by the higher number of grocery store mislabels, relative to restaurants. restaurants are going to sell farm raised if its cheaper, and most socalled seafood restaurants have very little fresh product.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 20:17 | 3296272 PrintemDano
PrintemDano's picture

I recommend not eating food that lives in it's own toilet.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:09 | 3294386 tony bonn
tony bonn's picture

people on the west coast shouldn't eat anything out of the water or breathe the air as it is all radiated thanks to the criminal management of fukushima...japan should be bombed again for that crap they spilled into the ocean....

i reissue my prediction for a collapse in west coast real estate as more and more people realize what a toxic hell it is - due to skyrocketing cancers and other ill health....CA was once a glorious state but it is absolutely ruined by stupidity at home and abroad....

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:17 | 3294410 Oldwood
Oldwood's picture

How do you think they are keeping those "glowing complextions" anyway?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:06 | 3294510 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

the "west coast" areas are indeed reporting spikes in radiation, but nowhere is actually immune, sadly.

radiation network.

and then there's Hanford, story dated  15 Feb. 2013,

American’s most contaminated nuclear site is leaking an alarming amount of nuclear waste, Washington state Gov. Jay Inslee told reporters today.

Relaying information from the US Department of Energy, the governor said between 150 and 300 gallons of radioactive material might be seeping from an underground storage tank.

Columbia River, yeah. . . nuclear waste management, in a nationstate about to collapse financially. . .

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:40 | 3294743 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

#1 Superfund!

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:12 | 3294844 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

It was amazing to see when I was living in Spokane how many people had thyroid problems or even thyroid cancer. I used to think it was because of iodine deficiency. Not so much now. A lot of muscular dystrophy too. I guess ignorance is not always blissful. I'm so glad I got out of there. Of course now Japan is dumping radioactive material probably much worse than Handford. We're running out of places to go on this planet.

Miffed;-)

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 02:48 | 3294924 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

Hey Miffed: As much as we joke around here I am with you. I asked your advice a few weeks ago about preppers stocking animal anti-bios and your reply was pure gold and should be taken to heart, and a lesson learned for even the most confident preppers. I seriously think the "wet coast" is buggered. Japan radiation is nearing its 2 year anniversary (March 11). Imagine your house on fire for 2 years, yet you can't see the flames, you can't feel the toxic smoke, you can't feel the heat... yet somehow you/we are still alive... until we're not.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 16:34 | 3295771 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

So right Angus! I used to feel so relieved we left Spokane and away from Handford. Now I see it was just out of the frying pan into the fire. I'm glad I helped you make a decision about the fish antibiotics. I think a lot of this is just people are just so afraid they're just grabbing at anything that may give them the feeling of safety. I have to fight it too, the world is so dark now....it's hard not to get sucked in.

Keep the jokes coming! I really need the laughter. This thread has been so fun. Of course anything with "anal leakage " was destined to go to the fun side. The other day I was joking with the building manager at my work when I turned something around he said to imply his organ size. He burst into a hearty belly laugh at my double entendre and then with large eyes suddenly stopped and said " remember YOU said that not me" and quickly walked away. I felt hurt but then I realized we have been pounded recently about sexual harassment at work and he was just covering his ass. Then I log into ZH and people are ranting about smegma licking fucking banksters.
I guess this forum is one of the few places left men can really vent and say their true feelings without censure. Too many of you have let women put your balls in a box. Everything today has become so polar and so fake I guess the relationship between the sexes must go there too.

Miffed:-)

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:10 | 3294388 Catullus
Catullus's picture

I knew it, goddamnit!!!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:10 | 3294389 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Didn't Doritos have a similar oily asshole leakage problem with that ingredient Olio? Not that Doritos, or was it Lay's potato chips, need added diarrhea in the first place.

Also, for your information, drinking 10-12 of Budweiser's supposed new subsidiary Kona and it's beers produce the same result, flaming liquid asshole - aka The Bernakies of Bernankerrhea!

These are all basically a pictorial of today's modern central banking debt system.

ZeroHedge is the shit, though.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:14 | 3294403 1eyedman
1eyedman's picture

it was called olestra, and caused anal leakage if memory serves.  that was the end of my chip consuming ways.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:19 | 3294416 Dr. Richard Head
Dr. Richard Head's picture

Thanks One Eye!

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 02:34 | 3294913 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

Thanks One Eye!

... for solving the problems of my brown eye...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:11 | 3294393 geotrader
geotrader's picture

Uncontrollable anal leakage => diarrhea to most people.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:17 | 3294412 Prof. Jack Meoff
Prof. Jack Meoff's picture

Studies show that 69% of lobster meat contain traces of seahorse meat

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 12:34 | 3295419 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

Monkeys make up over 80% of the monkey population.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6eYym47uB0

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:22 | 3294423 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

horse meat sellingt beef prices and analfish selling at bluefin tuna prices.  inflation is cruel riddlemaster.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:05 | 3294837 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

You forgot pig anus calamari as mentioned by another poster. Apparently a pigs asshole tastes like Goldman Sachs (squid).

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:23 | 3294425 Whiner
Whiner's picture

I don't believe this applies to my stock pile of Bumble Bee Tuna.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:38 | 3294575 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

You sap ~ That's not actually TUNA, it's ground up bumble bees...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:23 | 3294427 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

thank god nothing else looks like chicken wings...i hope.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 12:43 | 3295433 Tijuana Donkey Show
Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

Baby arms...... 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:28 | 3294437 gbresnahan
gbresnahan's picture

imho if food is manipulated or misrepresented those responsible should be executed.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:32 | 3294446 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Hey, that means Real tuna now costs so much only the 1% can afford it!
Oh well, I can still have a Bud to take the edge off the frustration....Oh wait! Bud is less than 5% !

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:45 | 3294450 spanish inquisition
spanish inquisition's picture

"Question for 200- "Snapper" is mislabeled 6 out of 7 times. If you are in a bar and hit on 7 "women" and 6 are men, what country are you in?"..."John, for the answer"

"Alex, the answer is Where is Thailand?"

"Correct for 200, You have the board"

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:10 | 3294515 Cathartes Aura
Cathartes Aura's picture

sex tourists pay for their intended experience(s).

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 01:16 | 3294849 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Sigh, so true. And then they need my services. Some things never change CA.

Miffed;-)

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:35 | 3294451 HulkHogan
HulkHogan's picture

Yum, pink fish slime.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:35 | 3294453 ektor
ektor's picture

looka like salmon is a safe labeled fish but, and it s a big but, recently we have learned that some smart minds have decided to give pesticid to salmon

http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2012/sep/10/scottish-fish-farmers-...

so no meat, no fish. each day this world is looking better

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:40 | 3294454 Dr Paul Krugman
Dr Paul Krugman's picture

I read the whole comments section and no one wrote "tungsten", thank god.

There is still hope for you doomers!  Haha.

And thank you for the notice, Tyler, I will make sure I only buy the best sushi.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:44 | 3294752 Teamtc321
Teamtc321's picture

Little Paulie, Shut up and eat your Tuna.  Then after dinner, get to bed and jam your Ben Wa Tungsten Balls up your ass.

 

And stop reading "the whole" comments section, you will put your eye out.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:54 | 3294759 knukles
knukles's picture

He has only one eye?

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 05:18 | 3294978 resurger
resurger's picture

i wish one of the doomers who read this works in a sushi joint so whenever he sees you he flems right into ur order and his superior promotes him because he's doint a favor for mankind and humanity...

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 09:56 | 3295153 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

Sloppy, there, professor. Very sloppy work. You spoke too soon.

 

But that's what you think about inflation, right?

 

http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-03-02/first-horsemeat-trading-now-59-...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:41 | 3294458 Pseudo Anonym
Pseudo Anonym's picture

sea chicken, yum

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:45 | 3294467 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Soon gopher and squirrel won't taste half bad....worm sandwiches too!

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 12:38 | 3295423 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

That's not caviar it's salty hamster balls in squid ink.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 12:50 | 3295443 Tijuana Donkey Show
Tijuana Donkey Show's picture

Squirrel is actually pretty tasty. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:50 | 3294475 Kastorsky
Kastorsky's picture

It pronounced "Anal Seepage".

Everybody dance now

http://www.rathergood.com/seepage

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:55 | 3294486 Money Squid
Money Squid's picture

I just heard the one about switching calamarie out for pig anus. NPR report says they look and taste the same. I'll take their word for it.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:56 | 3294490 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

So should we call Soylent Green:  tuna, salmon, Vegemite, Spam, tofu, scrapple, or just beef?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 20:57 | 3294494 Kirk2NCC1701
Kirk2NCC1701's picture

Add "eats Tuna" to list of ppl not to socialize with. ;-)

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:10 | 3294518 Clowns on Acid
Clowns on Acid's picture

A fish rots from the head.....

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:12 | 3294520 egoist
egoist's picture
Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:20 | 3294531 Hubbs
Hubbs's picture

Fiat currency, fiat fish. What's the difference?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:22 | 3294537 deerhunter
deerhunter's picture

Does anyone wonder what fish smelled like before women started swimming? Chicken of the Sea maybe?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:27 | 3294545 phoolish
phoolish's picture

The problem there is simply too much regulation.  If we'd remove the last 2 inspectors I'm sure they could acheive 100%.

 

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:29 | 3294551 BattlegroundEur...
BattlegroundEurope2011's picture

Wiki it.  That Escolar fish deserves to become extinct.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:37 | 3294573 Sutton
Sutton's picture

Sorry Charlie

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:38 | 3294576 world_debt_slave
world_debt_slave's picture

back in 2010  I was able to get "King of the Sea" tuna that was kosher but not available any longer.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 21:47 | 3294587 djsmps
djsmps's picture

I am embarrassed to say that I have suffered from prolonged, uncontrollable, oily anal leakage. But I thought broccoli was the cause.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:53 | 3294672 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture

I thought it was the 7-11 chimichangas.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:57 | 3294763 knukles
knukles's picture

Discount Quickie Gas-O-Mart carpachio

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 12:41 | 3295427 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture

The "Truck Stopper" was developed during the Spanish Inquisition.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:35 | 3294800 Blue Horshoe Lo...
Blue Horshoe Loves Annacott Steel's picture

George Michael from Wham! Wants to meet U in a rest area bathroom.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 02:29 | 3294906 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

That would make you a dumb-ass...

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:14 | 3294613 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

Purposely trying to get your date to eat some white tuna at the sushi joint should be a tip off that you are looking for love in all the wrong places.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:19 | 3294617 Father Lucifer
Father Lucifer's picture

One good thing about being old these days, the future looks like shit. I feel for my kids.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 06:23 | 3295003 Clowns on Acid
Clowns on Acid's picture

The future sucks....

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:35 | 3294633 Dewey Cheatum Howe
Dewey Cheatum Howe's picture

The author wasn't kidding about anal oil leakage. I had to go look at the wikipedia page just to see if that was a goof or not.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Escolar

Escolar's wax ester content can cause keriorrhea (Greek: flow of wax), gempylotoxism or gempylid fish poisoning.  Keriorrhea is similar to diarrhea, only the body will expel yellowish-orange drops of oil instead of liquid bowel movements. Some individuals suffering from escolar-induced keriorrhea also report other digestive issues, including stomach cramps, diarrhea, headaches, nausea, vomiting, and anal leakage; onset may occur between 30 minutes and 36 hours following consumption.  This condition may also be referred to as steatorrhea.

 

I'll take trigger burgers for $500 Alex. You guys can keep your fake sushi.

 

I think someone needs to order a platter of this stuff and send it over to the FED for lunch.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:13 | 3294706 Wjunk
Wjunk's picture

It is delicious. The article also says " limit portions to sixteen ounces or less" to avoid distress.  Anyone eating a pound or more of meat in one setting deserves oily anal leakage.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:35 | 3294801 Angus McHugepenis
Angus McHugepenis's picture

 

Anyone eating a pound or more of meat in one setting deserves oily anal leakage.

I must be the exception to that rule. I hate fish yet I can power snack on a couple pounds of road kill and my arse remains tight as a drum.

WC Fields wouldn't even drink water. Why? "Because fish fuck in it". I have no idea if that's true so Google your asses off bitchez.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:30 | 3294639 eddiebe
eddiebe's picture

Did you hear about the girl that went fishing with 3 guys? She didnt catch any fish, but she sure came home with a red snapper.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:34 | 3294647 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

i will drink some watered down beer and think about this for awhile. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:47 | 3294663 Freewheelin Franklin
Freewheelin Franklin's picture
New Study Shows 59% of “Tuna” Sold in the U.S. Isn’t Tuna

 

That's OK because the money I'm buying it with isn't money.

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:51 | 3294671 Spigot
Spigot's picture

You guys have given me my pulmonary workout for the day. Lungs all clear all the way down. I've not laughed so hard since...well, 2012.

And when I read the 'leakage' language I mis-read it as "...Orly anal leakage..." , which on second thought is just right!

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 22:59 | 3294680 trevor15
trevor15's picture

Yeah but they are omega-3 oils, so....

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:59 | 3294767 knukles
knukles's picture

So the shits good for ya to eat!

 

Get it shit, eat?
LOL
Goddamned I'm funny

Hey Paulie!
Want a bite?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:01 | 3294685 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

"Eat anything that is sold in the meat market without asking questions"...

 

(for conscience’ sake)...

Apostle Paul to the residents of Corinth.  First letter, 10th chapter, 25th verse. 

 

Sound advice imho.

 

 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:31 | 3294734 GMadScientist
GMadScientist's picture

"This sermon brought to you by the following sponsors..."

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 00:01 | 3294770 knukles
knukles's picture

Oh man, you are destined for a long stay in Purgatory for that one, 24/7/365 right next ti Paul Krugman.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 15:50 | 3295770 Boxed Merlot
Boxed Merlot's picture

Destined?  Been here, doing that.  Light a candle already, will ya?

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:04 | 3294691 honestann
honestann's picture

Did you say "mislabeled"?  You mean "fraudulantly labeled", do you not?  To call something "mislabeled" implies a mistake.  These are not mistakes, these are intentional fraud.  Period.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 08:55 | 3295088 TBT or not TBT
TBT or not TBT's picture

Plausible deniability cleans your conscience right up.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 08:58 | 3295091 Whats that smell
Whats that smell's picture

If a poor working person does it it is fraud, if a large international company does it it is a mistake.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 20:05 | 3296235 Esculent 69
Esculent 69's picture

Actually an error does not become a mistake until you refuse to correct it.  JFK 1961

The fact that someone found out about it or it happened to you is the mistake.

An error is that it was not suppose to happen in the first place.  Like when your computer freezes or wigs out it always reads error. 

Sat, 03/02/2013 - 23:10 | 3294703 Wjunk
Wjunk's picture

"a fish that can cause prolonged, uncontrollable, oily anal leakage."

Sure. If you eat a shitload of it. If you like Sushi, Escolar is delicious and it takes about 6 ounces of the fish to cause some kind of gastic distress.

 

I specifically ask if they have it on the menu - its my favorite next to salmon.  So yes, its mislabled often, but its not like white tuna is better or tastier.  Sheesh.

Sun, 03/03/2013 - 08:52 | 3295086 Whats that smell
Whats that smell's picture

Carp mislabeled as cod?

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