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The Most Important Chart For Trading The FOMC Statement

Tyler Durden's picture




 

As traders, economists, and TV talking-heads parse every word of Janet Yellen's first FOMC statement for hints at when the punchbowl (if ever) will be removed, there is - as the following chart clearly shows - only one thing that really matters...

 

h/t @Not_Jim_Cramer

And as we know all that matters for stock prices is the Fed balance sheet...

 

Unfortunately, for those hoping for moar, the trend is not your friend as it seems we saw "peak FOMC words" in December...

 

So now we know - we must see more words or it's all over...

 

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Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:51 | 4568476 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

The HFT machines must be ejaculating over this (more words to drive stocks higher)...they also know that Yellen is a bitch (female) but they cant understand pictures (which shows her to be the real hag that she is) or else they will be crapping all over the place.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:55 | 4568511 666
666's picture

The only thing that matters is who gets the leaked information first so the HFTs can roar ahead.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:59 | 4568531 remain calm
remain calm's picture

What if they show us a picture? Is a picture worth a thousand words?

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:01 | 4568539 Beam Me Up Scotty
Beam Me Up Scotty's picture

Lots of "hot air" to blow big bubbles.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:01 | 4568541 Slave
Slave's picture

Whoa whoa whoa whoa....Yellen is female??

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:50 | 4568478 outamyeffinway
outamyeffinway's picture

MOAR!!!!

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:58 | 4568527 Divided States ...
Divided States of America's picture

This J-bitch cluelessly blabbers on because she likes to beat around the bush.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:51 | 4568480 ml8ml8
ml8ml8's picture

I seriously can't wait to see Chairmother Yellen play mother hen to the press corps.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:55 | 4568514 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

are you referring to the puppet show where "journalists" ask questions that have already been pre-approved by the fat cow?  what happens if someone grows a pair and asks a real question (ie, how much money did the Fed lose on its MBS holdings in 2013)?  arrested and sent to quatanamo?

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:06 | 4568569 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

Think Helen Thomas can answer that one....

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:04 | 4568481 FieldingMellish
FieldingMellish's picture

S&P soars... PM smack. That is how you trade it. Gold already slipping in anticipation...

 

Well.. I was half right.... mind you... SP climbing now while PM spanking continues...

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:52 | 4568485 pragmatic hobo
pragmatic hobo's picture

i heard yellen was really chatty ...

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:57 | 4568520 1stepcloser
1stepcloser's picture

all women need to get their 1000 words in daily...

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:52 | 4568486 fonzannoon
fonzannoon's picture

it would be cool if we could get gold down $25 before 2pm so the next $25 drop seems less violent and more orderly.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:52 | 4568487 101 years and c...
101 years and counting's picture

a 70 year old fat degenerate cow is running the Fed.  all you really need to know about how fucked the US is.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:55 | 4568516 The Most Intere...
The Most Interesting Frog in the World's picture

this is an insult to cows everywhere...  and probably a civil rights issue...

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:00 | 4568536 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

MOOOO motherfuckers.  Just MOOOOO.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:52 | 4568493 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Janet's first statement today will be "I'd like ya'll to refer to me as the Princess of Printing, Biatch that Buried Bitcoin, Madame of the Market."  She'll throw in the "ya'll" even though in the real world she doesn't use it, just like our dear leader.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:52 | 4568494 insanelysane
insanelysane's picture

Janet's first statement today will be "I'd like ya'll to refer to me as the Princess of Printing, Biatch that Buried Bitcoin, Madame of the Market."  She'll throw in the "ya'll" even though in the real world she doesn't use it, just like our dear leader.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:53 | 4568496 The Most Intere...
The Most Interesting Frog in the World's picture

Twend is not your fwiend....

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:56 | 4568498 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

    I've got my stack of bricks ready to hurl at that bung hole Liesman when I tune into the "Blowhorn CNBS" for 30 seconds to hear the FOMC announcement.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:00 | 4568533 Beam Me Up Scotty
Beam Me Up Scotty's picture

Someone needs to Benny Hill slap that bald headed idiot.  Right on live TeeVee.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:53 | 4568499 Dollarmedes
Dollarmedes's picture

"only one thing that really matters..."

The Fed's "shadow ops" in Brussells.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:54 | 4568502 ParkAveFlasher
ParkAveFlasher's picture

So if I'm reading this right, there is a direct correlation between the Fed's balance sheet and the amount of hot air exhausted by the Fed chief.  Each day, the world reaches a new dimension in concrete manifestation of hitherto ironic symbolism.  It's seriously amazing.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:02 | 4568544 El Vaquero
El Vaquero's picture

The bigger the balance sheet, the more they have to convince the world that they're doing the right thing and not monetizing the debt.  It actually kinda makes sense. 

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:55 | 4568512 Glass Seagull
Glass Seagull's picture

 

 

More rationalization = more words.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:57 | 4568519 sudzee
sudzee's picture

Yellen about to say taper on cause WE can't afford to buy any more of that shit.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 13:59 | 4568528 Charles Nelson ...
Charles Nelson Reilly's picture

does Hilsenramp already have his 578 word piece out yet?

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:00 | 4568534 dontgoforit
dontgoforit's picture

Yellin to the high heavens!  and saying what?  3 more years? They'll pull the plug when the Reps regain control.  Either way it's a Chinese firedrill.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:01 | 4568540 MFLTucson
MFLTucson's picture

The American clown show, all smoke and mirrors, no economy what so ever. 

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:12 | 4568614 booboo
booboo's picture

Phd's don't stutter "um" "uh" and "you know" so we know Obama may be in the running for Fed chair in a few years.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:10 | 4568594 slightlyskeptical
slightlyskeptical's picture

Taper continues regardless of unemployment level. Bullish!

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:18 | 4568648 booboo
booboo's picture

The Fed dumped the UE as a barometer because like all things bullshit can even overshoot. At the current rate the Office of Making Shit Up will announce a 2.3% UE because if dead people can vote they sure in the hell can work. Besides in order to keep the ponzi debt baloon filled they will need to be giving Earned Income Tax Credits and food stamps to the dead.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:13 | 4568620 Amish Hacker
Amish Hacker's picture

Correlation is not causation, except that sometimes it is, like probably now. Maybe the best Fed strategy would be to stop printing dollars and just print lots of words.

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 14:16 | 4568638 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

X + bullshit = $ ** bullshit

Bullshit, ask for it by name!

Wed, 03/19/2014 - 15:07 | 4568946 t0mmyBerg
t0mmyBerg's picture

One of the best posts ever on ZH

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