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Yellen Testifies To The Senate - Live Webcast

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Reflecting proudly on how her words were received (surprise!) dovishly yesterday during her congressional hearing (and stocks closed green), we are sure Fed Chairmanwoman Janet Yellen will be brimming with "nothing can stop me now" confidence as she heads into the ring with the Senate Budget Committee. The big headline from yesterday's Q&A that "the recent flattening out in housing activity could prove more protracted than currently expected," will we are sure be caveated with excess hope and exuberance today as yet another set of politicians attempt to pin her back down to 6 months. The biggest thing to watch, we suspect, if she reiterates her "sell small caps" recommendation...

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If embed is not working click here for C-SPAN link

 

Yesterday's prepared remarks (in algo-readable format)

and full text

Yellen Testimony

 

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Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:34 | 4739435 PlusTic
PlusTic's picture

ready, aim, fire!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:47 | 4739482 MillionDollarBonus_
MillionDollarBonus_'s picture

One of the things I want to see our Federal Reserve pay a lot more attention to is crypto-terrorism. In particular, it's about time that we started regulating the use of dangerous crypto-currencies such as 'bitcoin', which have received a lot of attention from the press lately. We already have a national currency, so what reason could people possibly have for transacting in crypto-currencies other than to conceal criminal activity?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:53 | 4739500 Skin666
Skin666's picture

You getting worried about crypto-currencies MDB? You should!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:02 | 4739532 SoilMyselfRotten
SoilMyselfRotten's picture

MDB, please remove(-Bo) from your name and insert (+A) and your posts will be far better received

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:27 | 4739660 lordylord
lordylord's picture

or remove "nus" and add "zo"

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:39 | 4739700 smlbizman
smlbizman's picture

so when did moe dye his hair?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:00 | 4739785 Looney
Looney's picture

Yellen - what a disgusting clueless cunt!

Fuck you, Yellen! And fuck you, Bernanke!

Looney

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:59 | 4739521 DavidC
DavidC's picture

MDB,
Did you miss the sarc tag there?

DavidC

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 14:46 | 4740636 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

No DavidC....that's his thing and he's good at it.
Consider it implied satire moving forward.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:59 | 4739522 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Unless of course you are concealing transactions from the criminals.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:00 | 4739530 Blano
Blano's picture

I'm more concerned about fraudulent companies like Herbalife and their distributors (hint hint).

I know it's early, but try to be more funny please.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:04 | 4739538 Tinky
Tinky's picture

"We already have a national currency, so what reason could people possibly have for transacting in crypto-currencies other than to conceal criminal activity?"

In order to keep our resident BiTroll, phonestar, solvent.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:04 | 4739542 intotheblack
intotheblack's picture

I wish we didn't have a national "currency."

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:14 | 4739594 free_lunch
free_lunch's picture

Ah MDB I see you read the memo from the head of your troll department.

"New strategy announcement.

Since our MSM PR campaign failed to meet sales targets, as of today all troll's have to paint BTC as a danger to government on all blogs.

Happy trolling - Ministry of truth"

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:36 | 4739686 JRobby
JRobby's picture

"to conceal criminal activity?"

 

Laugh track growing louder, louder, deafening, speakers just blew out whew!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:35 | 4739438 jackofhearts
jackofhearts's picture

Haven't we heard enough?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:36 | 4739440 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

wake me when she's  dead....

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:36 | 4739441 y3maxx
y3maxx's picture

Rumour floating across the Capital this A.M. is...

Michelle is considering running for POTUS.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:44 | 4739472 pods
pods's picture

Oh great, Wookie foreign policy.

<shudder>

pods

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:17 | 4739606 TeamDepends
TeamDepends's picture

He would make a great reader.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:03 | 4739534 Blano
Blano's picture

The Welfare Rats in Chief gotta keep those multi-million dollar vacations coming somehow.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:03 | 4739443 ejmoosa
ejmoosa's picture

If we can just drive out the small caps from the economy, have those dollars and sales flow to the big caps, then we can just keep moving higher and higher.

 

Who cares if we stifle job creation and product ingenuity?

Sacrifices MUST be made.

 

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:36 | 4739444 Eyeroller
Eyeroller's picture

Ponzi scheme bitch.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:38 | 4739450 Cacete de Ouro
Cacete de Ouro's picture

I'm trying to keep my breakfast down...

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:38 | 4739452 youngman
youngman's picture

Her voice annoys me to much to listen to her...and the Politicians strutting their lack of knowledge really makes me mad....so stupid....just reading what someone has written for them...

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:40 | 4739457 JRobby
JRobby's picture

"The biggest thing to watch, we suspect, if she reiterates her "sell small caps" recommendation..."

Makes sense since small caps is where REAL MEASURABLE JOB GROWTH BEGINS. I mean what the hell will they do with all those FEMA camps if there is real job growth?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:44 | 4739473 Elliptico
Elliptico's picture

Needs laugh track.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:45 | 4739475 Rathmullan
Rathmullan's picture

The "Housing Sector" at any and all costs - sounds like a job for "negative real mortgage rates" and we all know how to get there.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:58 | 4739519 NihilistZero
NihilistZero's picture

Unless NINJA loans on steroids return, which I doubt, Housing Bubble 2.0 is toast. Bubble areas are back to 2007 prices, wages are down and food and energy costs are skyrocketing.  Ultimately the FED gives a shit about housing.  Up or down they'll proceed in whatever direction serves the Big 4 banks interests.

 

 

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:48 | 4739735 JRobby
JRobby's picture

Time to sit for that "Certified Appraiser Licencing" exam?

 

What a joke

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:46 | 4739477 Yen Cross
Yen Cross's picture

    That door in the back of the chamber is about the size of the door traders will be trying to squeeze through when the markets blow up...

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:46 | 4739478 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

"I appreciate this opportunity to discuss the current economic situation and outlook along with monetary policy before turning to some issues regarding financial stability."

Translation:

"I recognize your authority to continue to provide the illusion that the Federal Reserve's counterfeiting mechanisms which in fact exhibit a long train of abuses and usurpations pursuing invariably the same object are honest and just and not at all contradictory to our Constitution.

...But look not there and instead let us walk over here, shall we? "

 
Thu, 05/08/2014 - 14:48 | 4740643 IndyPat
IndyPat's picture

If I had a tumor, I'd name it Yellen.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:57 | 4739479 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Hey grandma Yellen, What do you think about High yield? Is it getting a little bubbly? Should I add exposure or get out?

 

Remove all those silly questions from your head son. Grandma has it all under control. Here have a cookie.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:48 | 4739484 khakuda
khakuda's picture

"Hey Janet, here are a ton of really good questions.  You don't actually have to answer them."

You can't make this stuff up?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:52 | 4739497 The_Ungrateful_Yid
The_Ungrateful_Yid's picture

We need moar yellen, foward bitches!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:52 | 4739499 Al Huxley
Al Huxley's picture

It's nice that the owner of the equity markets is now providing buy/sell recos - what about the tech sector Ms Debtfire?  Do you feel this is a sell too, or more of a 'buy the dip' opportunity?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:09 | 4739561 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

Ms Debtfire....and Moe Howards daughter?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:12 | 4739577 suteibu
suteibu's picture

Mother.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:56 | 4739504 optimator
optimator's picture

They should practice reading their prepared, by their superiors, statements before going live.  Look at her making believe she didn't read his script ten times over last night.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 09:55 | 4739505 Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

look at the fucking Dow...

Rigged.....

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:02 | 4739533 OC Sure
OC Sure's picture

But this year, "sell in May and go away" is the year that old saw has sharpened teeth.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:00 | 4739525 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

Any chance the FED can stop helpin' the little guy? They can't take much more!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:03 | 4739539 JailBanksters
JailBanksters's picture

Undermining the FEDS credibility !! WTF , that's Gold jerry, GOLD.

Why does Yelloen keep nodding, has some got remote control or has somebody got their hand up her sphing sphing

So she lied, just like all the predecessors.

 

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:05 | 4739544 Tinky
Tinky's picture

I would so love to have George Costanza question her...

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:06 | 4739548 Obama_4_Dictator
Obama_4_Dictator's picture

Be a man, bitch....raise interest rates!!!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:05 | 4739780 CHX
CHX's picture

Won't happen until gold spikes and/or the USD collapses, but at that time it's too late and game over. Higher rates will lead to default on US debt and thus more QE and further economic contraction all of which will not help at that point in time. So, it's S.O.S. until it all comes crashing down faster than most think possible IMHO. 

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:08 | 4739825 Obama_4_Dictator
Obama_4_Dictator's picture

I am well aware of that fact.  I want that to happen, just raise rates, stop lying, bitch!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:07 | 4739552 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

A room full of liars, filling the air with lies, in word and deed.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:08 | 4739557 optimator
optimator's picture

They should replace the gold chain around her neck and replace with a nicely embroidered yellow star.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:12 | 4739560 yogibear
yogibear's picture

A slow grind down for the middle class as they transfer more wealth to the 1%.

More banks. Banks everywhere. Who needs manufacturing whe all you need are more financial companies.

 

Yellen is another useless leech on the board of leeches. 

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:03 | 4739627 deflator
deflator's picture

"the recent flattening out in housing activity could prove more protracted than currently expected,"

Translation: All those boarded up bank owned houses can never be sold lest their true values be revealed.

 The good news is the construction sector gets a boost from boarding up windows and doors.

 Why not just sell those houses rather than let them just sit idle and deteriorating, property taxes, vandalism, etc.?

 Oh yeah, marked to fantasy becomes marked to market and the banks(and hedge funds) balance sheets implode like a death star.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:23 | 4739641 Itchy and Scratchy
Itchy and Scratchy's picture

Woohoo! Great news for the rich: Interests Rates frozen at zero for another 5 years!

The bad news for seniors & retirees : Price of dog food is rising!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:39 | 4739697 Lastline
Lastline's picture

Of course mainstream bitch-whore media wouldn't televise this because well... they don't want suckers err. investors to know what's really going on.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 10:45 | 4739718 BullyBearish
BullyBearish's picture

SO...............................I don't really know what the hell I'm talking about but I'm just a sweet 'ol grandma SO, be nice to me and LOVE the Fed

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:10 | 4739832 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Lol, listening to Mr Yellen squirming on salary.  Can't believe Grassley just described the Fed as a public institution and the chair as a public servant!!

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:10 | 4739836 Australian Economist
Australian Economist's picture

This Senator believes the FED is a Public Institution!

 

Do any of them think for themselves?

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:14 | 4739849 medium giraffe
medium giraffe's picture

Not just me then?!   Unbe-fkn-lievable

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:17 | 4739861 Australian Economist
Australian Economist's picture

DEFLATION! LOWFLATION!

 

Prices are rising too slowly*, we need to boost inflation back to it's 2% target

 

 

*excluding food, gas, education, healthcare, housing

 

Let them eat iPads

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:20 | 4739875 lemarche
lemarche's picture

WTF!!! I WAS WATCHING THE VIDEO FROM YESTERDAY !!!

REALIZED WHEN SOME SENATOR STARTED WORRYING ABOUT HIS DAUGHTER JOB PROSPECTS (HEARD AND REMEMBERED YESTERDAY)......

 

TELLS YOU ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THIS ECONOMY......

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 11:47 | 4739975 lemarche
lemarche's picture

GREAT JOB FROM SEN SESSIONS... HE REMINDED EVERYONE HOW ANOTHER FORMER CENTRAL BANKER WAS ANOTHER DOUCHEBAG, FORECASTING THE USA WOULD PAY OFF ITS DEBT BEFORE THE END OF THE DECADE IN 2002.... WHAT-A-DOUCHE !!!

YET EVERY TIME THOSE GUYS TALK THE MARKETS RIP OFF OON THE UPSIDE...............

WHAT IS IT? INSIDER TRADING? MANIPULATION FROM BANKS? ENDLESS HOPE IN SUPER HEROES SUCH AS CENTRAL BANKERS???...

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 12:42 | 4740145 q99x2
q99x2's picture

Arrest her. Don't let her get away. She is helping the banks attack the United States. I think it is treason; financial terrorism; crimes against humanity.

Thu, 05/08/2014 - 14:04 | 4740458 10mm
10mm's picture

I would like to see someone bust in with a whip and overturn the place. Oh wait, that's been done already.

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