Mike Bloomberg: "Israel Is Safe And It's A Great Place To Visit" As FAA Extends Flight Restrictions

Tyler Durden's picture

Yes, Israel is beautiful. Yes, Israeli hospitality is well-known. But now seems like an odd time to suggest a visit?



Of course, things are a little easier in your own personal jet... (and likely security detail)


Especially after this...


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TahoeBilly2012's picture

New York isn't safe and it's a shit hole to visit.

john39's picture

heading to his deep bunker?

ACP's picture

So, damn the FAA I'm going?

Little rich boy doesn't like what the government says so he does what he wants, but everyone else doesn't have that right.

I see...fucking hypocrite asshole.

Pinto Currency's picture



But not one word from Mike about the giant Slurpees you can buy in Israel.

krispkritter's picture

He doesn't want to be blamed for starting the Third Gulp War.

SumTing Wong's picture

Can we just send his ass to Israel, so long as he flies over Ukraine...

Damned Coca-Cola grabber and gun grabber. 

COSMOS's picture

Not one word either about the automatic rifles the people in settlements carry around with them.  Why doesnt Bloomie try to take their guns away LOL

Liberal's picture

As a staunch liberal and a defender of Israel, I agree with Bloomberg.


Israel is safe.  But let's not forget to ban 24oz sodas.  They're dangerous!

Save_America1st's picture


Haven't seen any good "fuck you's" in a while...the Bernank left a vacuum when he bailed out. 


Monty Burns's picture

"Yes, Israeli hospitality is well-known."

Look, the Israelis are an admirable people on so many levels.  But Jesus, hospitable they ain't. It's just about the last thing you could say about them.

Headbanger's picture


Now STAY there you fucking douche bag!

Divided States of America's picture

Amen heady!

BTW Mike, stay the fuck there you mother fucking zionist piece of shit.

Aaaarghh's picture


there, I feel better at least.

chunga's picture

this might bring you down a little. sorry

Israel asks U.S. for $225 million to replace missing Iron Dome parts Defense Secretary Chuck Hegel asks Congress to meet 'Israel's critical missile defense needs in light of the ongoing conflict in Gaza.'


Israel has requested an additional $225 million in United States funding for the production of Iron Dome components, in light of the wide-scale use of the system during Operation Protective Edge.


(save the click...that's all it says...you have to pay a few shekels to read the whole thing)

synergize's picture

Why are we giving them money???  WTF!

chunga's picture

I have a hunch but it's probably just racism by me.

Paveway IV's picture

Defense Secretary Hagel? 

Now potentially guilty of all the below:

  • Sedition
  • Treason
  • Withholding national security information from the Commander in Chief
  • Deriliction of duty
  • Failure to uphold the constitution
  • Aiding and abetting terrorists
  • Genocide
  • Crimes against humanity

Cashiering, followed by twenty years of penal servitude would be a good place to begin. To be followed by consideration of more serious penalties.

TeamDepends's picture

Don't worry, they'll pay it back with interest.  Like they always do.

svayambhu108's picture

There is hope for humanity people understand irony without the #ironic hashtag.

ajax's picture



"...American aid contributes to Israel’s lack of economic self-sufficiency. He observes that despite a sharp drop in Israel’s economic growth rate since 1973, the rate of private consumption growth has not dropped proportionately because a large percentage of the Israeli workforce is employed by the government or by government-owned corporations, which U.S. aid props up. As a result, Israelis are living beyond their means, and according to Levin they depend on U.S. aid to be able to do so. If this fiscal irresponsibility continues and the flow of aid ever stops, Israel’s lack of economic self-sufficiency could jeopardize its stability."


Monty Burns's picture

Why are we giving them money??? 

You mean you really don't know??

NoDebt's picture

"Boss!  The plane!  The Plane!"

"Smiles, everyone!  Smiles!  Mayor Bloomberg is arriving!"

"What's his fantasy, Boss?"

"He wanted to rule the world, but only made it as far as Mayor."

"That's so sad, Boss."

Grande Tetons's picture

This post should get a hall of fame vote. Awesome. 

DaveyJones's picture

Spit out my coffee funny

Dave Thomas's picture

Nice one, I raise a glass of 15 year old malt to you sir!

ajax's picture



"But not one word from Mike about the giant Slurpees you can buy in Israel."

They're called 'Freezies' in Israel: "With some start-up help from the Israeli government, Joe began importing and distributing Slurpee machines around the Promised Land, where the beverages are sold as Freezees for trademark reasons."

"Living The American Dream In The West Bank" 


Cathartes Aura's picture

Pinto Currency,

But not one word from Mike about the giant Slurpees you can buy in Israel.

tsk.  unlike in all areas "military" - where the US-tit is suckled with glee - Israel is "self-sufficient" in their soda streamin'.

just ask Scarlett Johannsson, a fave girlie-avatar 'round these parts. . .(link allows for POV-fave choices)

Boycott. Divest. Sanction.

Ms. Erable's picture

Tribetards are exempted from obeying laws and paying taxes; didn't you get the memo?

TahoeBilly2012's picture

It's because of their dashing good looks and whipsmart humor.

Larry Dallas's picture

Where in the Presidential Oath or in our Consitution is one obligated to defend Israel?

AssFire's picture

The TSA, NSA etc were never about Americans' safety, they are all about control- you don't see and 17 ounce cups there do you?

What is black and bown and doesnt work? Half of New York. Fuck New York.

zjxn06's picture

"Yes, Israeli hospitality is well-known."

Yup. Been there done that. Here's a brief recap of our visit in 2000:

Day 1:  Drove to Jerusalem from Cairo where we lived at the time.  Left our car in Taba. Crossed border at Eilat into Isreal, here we picked up  a rental car. Hastled by Israeli border guards questioning why our passports are stamped with so many Muslim countries.  I work in oil business, That's where the oil is. Asks me to step aside and wait.  Goes and speaks with his supervisor. Long discussion. Supervisor comes and grills us. Gruff response. Let's us through.  

Drive rental car from Eilat to Dead Sea for a swim and a float in world's saltiest water.  Prepare to leave and find rental car has been broken into.  Cameras, Luggage, laptops stolen in broad daylight.  This was at the main parking lot of the vistors center.

Call local police.  "Sorry, we can't help." Assume I sounded like a Goy over the phone.

Ended up driving to Jerusalem and checking into hotel with rude employees and  horrible food.  Have to file police report there for insurance claim purposes.  Take a taxi to main Jerusalem police station.  Was ripped off by overweight (350+) taxi driver.  Eating the whole time we drove. Talking to me through the food in his mouth.  Disgusting. Once to the police station, had to work through a gauntlet of Hassidim protesting the arrest of one of their own (who had likely built his house on land that was not his, guess who's?) to get into the Police station.  Had to show passport to three Uzi carrying guards at entrance.  Once in was told to sit and wait, and, wait, and wait.  After an hour waiting in an empty hallway, normal looking kid sits down next to me and strikes up a conversation in American English.  Turns out he's a Jewish kids from the Bronx.  Spoke yiddish. Nice kid . Ask him why he is in Police station.  Vague response. Tell him my story and frustrating.  He leaves, comes back with an officer that can help me.  By the time I get back to crummy hotel with rude employees it's midnight.  Daughter and son tell me they don't like this place and want to go home (Cairo).

Day 2: Next day take a tour of the old city (Jerusalem) .  Our guide is a very well educated Palestinian. Some friends had used him in their previous trip and highly recommended him. "You'll see why when you meet him" they tell us. Amazing guide.   Claimed he had fought with Brits in WWII N. Africa.  Told story of how his father's land was stolen in nation. Said he still had copy of deed to land family had occupied for multiple generations.  His knowledge of Bible, Koran, Torah was amazing.  I know Bible pretty well. He knew it better. Showed us a group of very young 18 year old Uzi-toting Isreali military inductees.  They were hastling several old Muslim women walking in the Muslim quarter.  Digging through their bags whcih appeared to hold groceries. Guide told us this was a normal daily occurence.  He suggested it was a common form of entertainment for young Isreali military youth to hastle the elderly Muslims.  From their behavior, had no reason to doubt our guide.

Day 3: Drove to Sea of Tiberius Galilee. Good day. Sight see on our own.  Drive by Kibbutzes and what appear to be very well run farms and orchards.  Minimum interaction with locals. Nice country side.  Stopped at rest stops along the way and back to eat and drink.  Truck loads (not kidding) of young military types stopped there as well to refresh themselves. Mostly well behaved.  Maybe it's because they haven't been fully "trained" yet.

Day 4: Drive to Amman Jordan.   Check into Mariott Hotel. Immediately feel better.  People at front desk every friendly, customer focused.  Order hamburgers and fries from room service.  As we're eating, my 7 year old son says: "Dad,  I never want to visit Isreal again."

We won't son. I promise

Duffy's picture

The security/gruffness, I suppose you can excuse.  How lucky for us that the ADL and AIPAC are ending US LEOs on paid junkets to Israel where they can learn to treat the denizens of small town Idaho like Palestinians...


One thing that never, ever makes the news, well two - the targeting of Eastern Catholic, Oriental and Eastern Orthodox Christian clergy and buildings - both by the Syria foreign Salafist rebels, and by Orthodox Jews in Israel and Occupied Palestine...




But I scarecely ever hear anything more than some lukewarm terse platitude from the ADL, and the "Christian" Zionists don't care about Catholics, Oriental Orthodox, or Eastern Orthodox Christians because they've been so, frankly, Zionized and Judaized...  Yeshua this, Moshiach that....  fucking half wits skin would burn if they actually tried to read the New Testament.  Pretty sure a crucifix would make a Christian Zionist recoil in pain.

Not really religious myself, have my moments, but heard about priests and ministers getting regularly spit on by the Jewish fundies.  I've heard, but don't know, that the Hasids in Brooklyn have done it as well - spit on the ground in front of churches more than dare to do it on priests..  my understanding is the Hasids are anti-"zionist" so this is a Jewish thing, not a "Zionist" thing.

In fairness, every religion has its nuts.  The thing is - we never hear about the Jewish ones.

IdiocracyIsAlreadyHere's picture

Fuck "Christian" Zionists.  These are the people who cheered loudest (outside the neocons themselves) for the Iraq War and couldn't have given two shits less that it was nothing but disaster for Iraq's ancient Christian communities.  Now that what is left of those communities are forced to flee with nothing but (at best) the clothes on their backs the response from the megachurch crowd - *crickets*

I have no use for the Abrahamic religions myself, but at least this heathen is appalled at the plight of Iraqi (and Palestinian) Christians. 

zjxn06's picture

"One thing that never, ever makes the news,"

Who owns the news in the US?

jcpicks's picture

Soda is more dangerous than missiles.

Buckaroo Banzai's picture

Better yet, wander around the Gaza strip wrapped in an Israeli flag shouting "Mohammed fucks goats" for about half an hour or so, and tell us what happened.

Colonel Klink's picture

So you're already aware of his bedroom antics huh?

Headbanger's picture

No, no., no..

It's "Mohammed fucks PIGS!"

Goats are kosher for fucking in Islam.


DaveyJones's picture

close, the goat actor is him not the holy guy

Urban Redneck's picture

How do you say "Praise the Lord and pass the ammo" in Arabic?

As much I dislike both sides' willingness to create collateral damage- one El-Al jet might be an acceptable bargain to get rid of Bloomturd once and for all.

Overfed's picture

And while you're there, die in a fire.

AnnndItsGone's picture

Putin must inovate, and i think personal jets are amazing for it.