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I've got a stomachful of Xanax. I took what was left of a bottle. It might have been too much.
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 15:22 -0400
You can't make this shit up. All you Hollywood agents scouring under the skirts of Daily Grill waitresses for your next script look no further (I will merely accept a firm virtual handshake and advance rights for my upcoming book), and all you employed sales people, here is a brilliant idea for how to bring your career to new heights...
Nortel Bondholders Biting Their Nails
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/13/2009 01:09 -0400As we reported on January 9, the likelihood of a Nortel bankrtupcy filing this coming Wednesday (coupon payment date) is high to quite high. Recent rumors from the underground community had suggested that Huawei was licking its chops at NT's metropolitan ethernet business and would pay up to $1 billion. However, based on reports from forbes and debtwire from earlier today, the deal is dead in the water. Ooops.
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...But Can Lose Even More Weight By Walking There
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/09/2009 23:38 -0400
Is Business Week merely slapping the faces of all those investors who in recent weeks bought a slew of follow-on stock issued by airline companies (probably the only companies raising capital in the past few months as $35 barrel/oi
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Show me the mo' money
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:27 -0400BN 11:25 *OBAMA ASKS BUSH TO NOTIFY CONGRESS OF INTENT TO SEEK TARP FUNDS
speaks for itself
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Mad-Cave Blueprints Procured
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/13/2009 02:16 -0400Well, it isn't apartment 14A/B in 740 Park, but Bernie's $7 million Guantanamo will make most studio and one bedroom NY dwellers green with unponziated envy.
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Citi Lives the Telecom Dream as Nortel is About to Wake
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/10/2009 01:21 -0400
It is good to see that even as the good men leaving the yellow van carrying a straight jacket (specifically outfitted with a bro/manzier for obvious purposes) are climbing up the arduous 59 stor»
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Dead Men Walking in South Beach
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:54 -0400
In what is the greatest annual boondoggle in the hedge fund community, the JP Morgan South Beach Conference, this year held February 2-4 in the Loews Hotel, one should be able to spot some very good leading trends of the credit markets for this year.
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Mad-Cave Blueprints Procured
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/13/2009 02:16 -0400Well, it isn't apartment 14A/B in 740 Park, but Bernie's $7 million Guantanamo will make most studio and one bedroom NY dwellers green with unponziated envy.
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Friday Night Rumor: MGM Selling Mirage to Penn Natl
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/10/2009 02:23 -0400
After losing his shirt, bifocals, and the backup tire of his Jeep Cherokee by assuming that Ford and GM are actually competitive in the global car market, Kirk Kerkorian is allegedly selling one of his prize jewels on the LV strip: the MGM Mirage.
Dead Men Walking in South Beach
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 17:54 -0400
In what is the greatest annual boondoggle in the hedge fund community, the JP Morgan South Beach Conference, this year held February 2-4 in the Loews Hotel, one should be able to spot some very good leading trends of the credit markets for this year.
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In Other News: People Still Throwing Away Millions
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/13/2009 02:50 -0400
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A Good Start...
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/10/2009 18:10 -0400
...Is 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean...
Bernie Forced To Find More Creative Ways to Launder Assets
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/12/2009 18:10 -0400BN 12:09 *BERNARD MADOFF STAYS FREE, MAGISTRATE JUDGE RULES
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*MADOFF IS CHARGED WITH SECURITIES FRAUD IN $50 BLN PONZI SCHEME
*MADOFF HAS BEEN UNDER HOUSE ARREST, GUARD, ELECTRONIC MONITOR
*MADOFF'S ATTORNEY SAID TRANSFER WAS AN `INNOCENT' MISTAKE'
*FEDERAL PROSECUTORS SAID BERNARD MADOFF IGNORED COURT RULING
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In Other News: People Still Throwing Away Millions
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/13/2009 02:50 -0400
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Timmmmmmmaaaayyyyyy.... reincarnated
Submitted by Tyler Durden on 01/10/2009 19:40 -0400
Yep folks, the man, the myth, the my-mom-does-my laundry womanizer may be gone (only temporarily - you can't get rid of Tim Sykes... something about weeds or cockroaches), but his spirit lives on. Just click here: http://www.greenwichtime.com/ci_11421481
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