This page has been archived and commenting is disabled.
The Charlie X Solution
Like other members of the sane world, I have been disturbed and distressed about the latest doings of the religion of peace, as Islamic nut-jobs terrorize the gentle citizens of Paris with murder and mayhem. As a writer myself, I feel strongly about the need for uncensored speech, and to see these members of what surely must be the universe's most psychologically-insecure religion slay satirists is deeply saddening.
And yet on Friday morning, the solution came to me in a shot. And, as with most good solutions, it comes from no less a place than Star Trek: The Original Series. Hear all now my idea:
The pilot episode of Star Trek was called Charlie X. Purists will argue that The Cage, with Captain Christopher Pike (and an oddly emotional early version of Spock) was the pilot, but, sorry, Kirk is the man, and they had to recycle the Pike episode into a two-parter later, so......shove it. It's Charlie X.
Anyway.
Charlie has taken over the Enterprise, and near the end of the show, Kirk finally decides what to do about this teenage menace: he turns on every single system the ship has. Spock and McCoy, on Kirk's orders, flick on every switch the bridge has, causing much beeping, buzzing, and booping. Kirk correctly assumes that Charlie can't handle the massive swirl of activity, and faced with all this pressure, he is effectively incapacitated.
And that, my friends, is what we need to do about the demands from the Muslim world that no one dare print images of the Prophet. My suggestion? Everyone print the images. Every. Body.
What I'm suggesting is a worldwide, coordinated effort among every magazine, newspaper, tabloid, scandal sheet, high school newspaper, and blog on Earth. On a given day (or for a given week.........or a given year.........let's see how long it takes) completely saturate the world with the Prophet (peas be upon him). Cartoons. Line drawings. Illustrations. Photoshopped exposes. You name it.
These pictures don't need to be obscene or pornographic. From what I understand, even flattering images (such as, I dunno, Muhammad sitting on a golden throne with rainbows and unicorns in the background) are considered blasphemous. Let your imagination run wild.
The problem with the handful of brave departed souls at Charlie Hebdo is that they made themselves an easy target. No one else had the gonads to stand up against terrorist threats (and I suppose I can't blame them). And don't give me this schtick about not wanting to offend a group: nobody gives a flying crap about respecting the beliefs of these clowns. They just don't want to end up with a bullet through their brain. The political correctness is just a front for self-preservation.
So pull a Charlie X on these guys. Give them not one target, but tens of thousands. Show them that the world of free speech is not going to be cowed into submission. Hell, balance things out with a worldwide mockery of Jesus, Buddha, and Moses for all I care. I'm a lifelong Christian myself, and every media outlet on the planet could show Jesus hanging out in a gay bar tongue-kissing Andy Dick, and I couldn't care less. It doesn't affect my beliefs, and it certainly isn't going to compel me to hurt anyone. (I also have the added advantage of not being a latent homosexual, which, errr, seems to be a bit of an issue with some of these bearded chaps. But I digress).
The question, of course, is where leadership will come from. Who will stand up and set the date? Obama? Ha! Ha ha ha! Oh, that's rich. This is a man who's afraid of his own shadow; he's not about to take a stand (particularly a politically incorrect stand). It'll have to be someone else.
Will this ever happen? I suppose not. But I at least wanted to toss the idea out there, because I think an impossibly diffuse target would drive radical Islam to the point of madness, perhaps to the point where they can focus on more important topics, such as the bitterly-dividing point as to whether the Prophet shaved his armpits or not (and, no, I'm not making this up). Until then, let us keep the sacrifice of the brave staff at Charlie Hebdo in mind. They were, after all, the real martyrs.
- advertisements -
ISLAM IS A RELIGION OF PEACE? Only if you are already dead!
Islam is a religion virtually unchanged from the 7th Century.
Muslims didn't even have the concept of, or a word for, secular. They had to borrow a French word for secular, though they still don't understand the concept of secular society, and separation between the state and religion.
Here are the conditions under which Islam is a religion of Peace:
1. Convert to Islam and follow Sharia Law. Otherwise, *Achmed, the dead Muslim terrorist says, "I kill you!
2. Follow Sharia Law. Otherwise, Achmed says, "I kill you!"
3. Things are much, much worse if you are a woman. You are chattel; you are property owned by your father, elder brother or husband. You must be beaten to keep order in the family. You have no rights. You cannot own property of any kind. You cannot sign contracts.
4. Say you are gang-raped by four righteous, upstanding Muslim men. They cannot be compelled to and won't testify against each other to prove rape at your trial. Achmed says, "You guilty. I kill you!"
Islam is a pre-cancerous/cancerous tumor metastasizing in the Western world. The basic tenets of Islam are completely incompatible with the foundations of Western nations. There should be a complete cessation of allowing Muslims to immigrate to the United States, Canada, Mexico, UK, Sweden, Switzerland, Finland, Iceland, Greenland, the European Union, and the rest of the Western world.
*Achmed the Dead Terrorist is a creation of the ventriloquist Jeff Dunham. Achmed was killed when he prematurely detonated his suicide bomb vest. All that was left of him was his talking head. Videos of Achmed may be found on YouTube.
Whereas Jesus simply demanded that his followers attack their families with swords.
Nicely taken out of context, a--hole.
Of course, nobody making comments about the Koran is quoting out of context!
This attack was not about a cartoon. It was about retaliation for the west's insistance on invasion, occupation, largely indescriminate bombing, droning, maiming, and killing in sovereign countries where we have no business or right to be. Our indiscretions and bullying have engendered a deep and abiding hatred among the inhabitents of these countries that finds release in what we call "terrorist attacks" but this most recent one was certainly not about a cartoon, it was about the hatred that we, ourselves, have instilled. When we leave them alone, they will leave us alone.
too naive for words. Check out southern Philipinnes, southern thailand, India partitions into Pakistan and Bangladesh. That religion won't leave anyone alone. It is a proselytizing religion as is Cristianity. If one is conivinced one has the ultimate divine truth one is obligated to convince others of that truth. Not sure about Hinduism and Bhuddism, but I am convinced they're all a bad lot.
"This attack was not about a cartoon. It was about retaliation for the west's insistance on invasion, occupation, largely indescriminate bombing, droning, maiming, and killing in sovereign countries where we have no business or right to be."
Ron Paul said the same on these pages just days ago but he received fewer downvotes.
If it wasn't an attack about a cartoon, why didn't they attack those invading, occupying, bombing, etc. I'm of the understanding that none of those killed were involved in those type of activities.
Likewise for the Boston Marathon bombers:
What kind of psychopathic society does it take to find such commonsense truths incomprehensible? And to do it with the deepest self-righteous sincerity?
Sure, they hate us for our disappearing freedumbs. We really must be that exceptional.
Citing one false flag atop another must be a great Victory for you. I'm astonished you couldn't work 7-7, 3-11 and 9-11 into it!
You are right arguing a need to get out of all Muslim countries and quit the fantasy world belief that we can coexist in harmony with Muslims. I dont apologize for governments that don't represent my values. Islam is an evil cult.
Www.citizenwarrior.com
The two brothers were KNOWN terrorists, with long records of terroristic acts - enough to justify a 10 person surveillance team. Yet the Frenchies stopped the surveillance, let them travel to al-Qaeda linked countries, and did not tap their phone or Internet use. Duh. There is no such thing as a reformed terrorist, so once they show their colors you do not let them back on the streets after 18 months in jail. You either re-open Devil's Island (or use the newly vacated beds at Gitmo), or you 'de Port' them (the Frenchies invented the word but apparently do not use it anymore), or you give them lifetime probation and monitoring that prohibits any travel or contacts with other terrorists (or risk invoking the earlier choices).
Maybe french intelligence wanted this to happen; thereby, creating a red flag to incite french citizens to demand that their muslim population be expelled from France. I know, I know. I'm becoming paranoid. ZH will do that to an otherwise normal person.
An automated surveillance system will not make that mistake.
To NoWayJose, your statement- "Yet the Frenchies stopped the surveillance, let them travel to al-Qaeda linked countries, and did not tap their phone or Internet use."- says it all. Western governments under the direction of the U.S. are told to stand down regarding terrorists. The West needs the terrorist attacks on Western soil to continue the fabricated war on terror. Look at Germany- willing to throw their own industries under the bus to apply U.S. directed sanctions against Russia. Look at France- told by the U.S. not to sell warships to Russia. What governments act this way? Compromised governments that's who. The NSA has got something on these EU government officials.
You want to stop terrorists- get out of their countries. America's reasons for war on Iraq- fake, Afghanistan- fake, Libya- fake, Syria- fake. These terrorists were allowed to operate out of need. Citizens are starting to see what this has all been about and so Western governments at the behest of the U.S.A. are standing down. The NSA is a dirty organization and the CIA its whore. It is starting to spin out of control and this bringing the terrorist activity to home turf is a last ditch attempt to shore up the support.
This attempt should backfire massively if people are thinking. What is the need for intelligence agencies if they can't stop a couple of brothers and another from this activity when they are- like you say- known?! Why are we throwing good money at security agencies who look the other way?
P.S. the article is a joke- the writer is suggesting poking a hornet's nest and will cry when he is stung. With this kind of thinking he should apply to the CIA- they pay well to get innocents killed.
Look at the foundation of Israel. Eventually the terrorists gained power and re-labelled themselves.
Take a look at Moshe Dayan, just for one example.
Also see Irgun, Stern Gang, King David Hotel bombing and Einstein's response to requests that he aid in the formation of the state of Israel.
Who says they didn't tap their phones or internet use? ALL phone and internet use is tapped.
Considering the first couple of sentences you wrote, there are no accidents either.
I think its a great idea, lets just see with our own eyes who opposes freeom of speech and the press in the western world.
#ChristianeAmanpourApologist
Many voices speaking...
MUSLIMS ARE RIGHT TO BE ANGRY"Madison was right when he said, “Liberty may be endangered by the abuses of liberty as well as the abuses of power.”
http://www.catholicleague.org/muslims-right-angry/
Christians have every right to be angry too.
The solution to this problem is for the West to stop invading, occupying, bombing, droning, and killing in sovereign countries across the globe where we don't belong.
If you throw a rock into a hornets nest, expect to be stung in return.
http://commondreams.org/views/2015/01/10/will-france-repeat-us-mistakes-...
And of course, the second best way for a muslim Frenchman to fight American's in Iraq and prisoners being abused is to kill unarmed French cartoonists, in Paris, with AK's, after being "undetained".
Makes perfect sense.
Dude, the profit$ was lampooned in caricature!!
It was a crisis!!
lol...seems everything is an earth shattering crisis generating profits these days.
After a while it gets old.
We just need more money printers so we can eliminate all crisies at the press of a button, and get profits from heaven without investing or working, and if anyone objects we can bomb them until they cheer up a bit.
- Ben derBanke, Leaked Secret Minutes FRB, May 29th, 2008
Hate has a sense all its own. So does blind vengeance.
You find their lack of logical sense strikingly different than the mass murderers leading our countries and their largely indifferent citizens?
What does "sense" got to do with any of this shit? At some point, boiling rage is going to find expression at an available target that may only dimly resemble the actual event or perpetrator that inspires it. Here at "Charlie," it would appear that obvious disrespect was the lightening rod. It doesn't seem that hard to understand.
I'm not condoning it, just stating what should be the obvious.
I would expect any rational person to not condone it. I would also expect any rational person to not treat the Muslim any differently than the Christian, Jew, Buddhist, Wiccan (whatever).
Muslim's who do this shit shouldn't get the "Aw shucks, its completely understandable because they're Muslim" treatment from people. Anyone who argues this is actually degrading the Muslim, it makes the Muslim seem less sophisticated, less intelligent, less compassionate, more emotional and intolerant and by extension covers for actions like this by some Muslims.
Muslims are not the victims here Bob, the 12 employees of Charlie Hebdo and the 4 at the grocery store are.
As an aside, the Muslim who should be celebrated in all this is the Mali who hid 20-30 customers in a freezer at the grocery store so they wouldn't be butchered by an Islamic nutcase...his name is Lassana.
http://www.parismatch.com/Actu/Societe/Lassana-le-heros-de-Vincennes-686818
And the great reset begins...
The employees of Charlie Hebdo didn't invade, occupy, bomb, drone or kill anyone.
WTF are you talking about?
For the twelve who gve you a thumbs up I will give them credit- the statement is true. However, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out the attacks were symbollic and allowed to happen to shore up support for the war on terror. The West intelligence agencies needs some terrorism on Western soil to occur as they see citizen's support for these unending wars diminish. This, just like 9/11, Boston bombings, 7/7 in U.K. stinks.
The most cost effective way to escape this cycle of terrorism is to get out of their countries. God did not leave the earth to be ruled by the West. Leave them alone. If they have a problem with the way their countries are being run it is up to them to take care of it. Don't give me this "we are there to help them achieve democracy." The U.S. has propped up some brutal dictators full well knowing what was going on. Read something on what America and the CIA have done to African nations and Latin American countries and tell me their motives are pure in the Middle East.
"Allowed to happen"...this is something else that needs to be addressed and I've touched on it in the past.
You are correct the people "of the West" do not (and never did) want a police state. Its unnatural and unhealthy for any society to want one. But along with that decision comes the expectation (or higher probability) that some nutcase will go off his rocker and kill people or destroy property.
I have no way (personally) to weigh how another person trades off their liberty and freedom for the perceived security of the state, I simply can't do it, as I value liberty and freedom to the extreme, its priceless.
But these incidents have also happened in what I would call the police states of the east, so there is no real protection from it by running toward the state.
It has happened from Moscow to Kunming to Riyadh.
No, they personally, did not invade, bomb, etc., but they were a part of the West and therefore, a target for retaliation. Obviously.
"... but they were a part of the West ..."
Maybe they should have taken revenge on people in Haiti, St Croix, the Bahamas, Paraguay ...
They are all part of the West.
You are wrong: violence begets violence.
"You are wrong: violence begets violence."
That violence begets violence seems to be Masked Man's point. He uses real world examples applicable to this situation in order to make the point. He does not appear to be justifying terrorist attacks but rather explaining that "violence begets violence" is the motivation for those attacks.
You're right when you say, "violence begets violence". If we go into their country and kill theirs, why are we surprised when they do the same to us and ours?
Yes, that "part of the west" that routinely satirize and parody Jews, Christians AND Muslims, along with any government it chooses to mock, its called the freedom of speech & press.
You seem to have the singular focus that any Muslim in the west is now justified to commit a little "workplace violence" just because their "prophet" was held up for ridicule and a bomb was dropped on someones head in the east.
Yet ISIS invaded & bombed Christians, Kurds & Yazidis in northern Iraq in the name of Islam and "the prophet", didn't they?
So I guess in your equal treatment world view, a little Christian retaliation would be completely justified against Muslims wherever they're found in the west, whether they personally beheaded & raped Christians, Kurds & Yazidis or not.
All I can say is continue to be careful when choosing your targets for retaliation, you should stick to the defenseless & unarmed like those in Paris or around Mosul, your odds of living (if only for a few more days) go up dramatically.
I NEVER said that violence against the west was "justified" in any way but, it becomes more understandable in light of the way the west bullies the world, kills, tortures, and destroys indescriminately.
If you described the mating rituals of rhesus monkeys there are some folks here who would think that you were attempting to run a simian dating service. Why is it so hard for people to understand that studying and commenting on a situation is not the same thing as promoting it?
In this place partisans peddling polarization is sport du jour.
Non-partisan is almost inconceivable here now, indeed an affront. So virtually every comment is translated by most commenters to create the requisite alternate universe upon reading, as it passes through that particular partisan filter. So a neutral comment is almost ubiquitously replied to in the most warped and unrelated way, replete with wild accusations and rumors of grandiose wrong-doings, plus bizarre questions of tribal affiliation. It's gotten like one of those rural Chi-Com denunciation trials from the mid 1960s, but here is the online analogue, alive and well in zh land.
I consider this mostly a symptomatic combination of chronic mental illness induced from stress, lax recreational chemical laws, diet, and poor sleep resulting in a weakened brain that is then reading all sorts of dubiously sourced or fact-checked (often 100% fictional) feral paranoid horseshit, right after sucking down the first crack-packed bucket-bong, and hash coffee slurp of the day.
The people who don't respond in that invariably bent manner, are unfortunately noticeably rarer each few months, plus the quality of humor fell off the cliff, which is the real kicker.
Speaking of partisan filters, what does everyone think of Chris Cuomo of CNN calling one of the Paris murderers African-American?
(In my best James Earl Jones voice)
This-Is-C-N-N ;-)
aaaaahhahhhhahhhah ...
Well, that's a pretty good approximation of the sound I made. Hilarious, top that!
We need a vid of that one. :D
Too funny.
I find it deplorable that you would promote humans having intimate relations with primates! For Shame!
How about if we just give Israel the same treatment?
Eeeeequality bitches!
I agree, let Israel work out its own problems as it sees fit and stay out of it.
A fatwa on Tim Knight for his blasphemy !!!!
Hell, yes.