WSJ, and CNN report that Schrenker is in the custody of the Gadsden County Sheriff's Office. Lt. Jim Corder says Marcus is alive and well. Schrenker managed to traverse a distance of 275 miles, from the house he showed up at on Sunday night in Childersburg, Ala, to his current location at Tallahassee Memorial Hosptial as apparently he had slit his wrists shortly before being captured.

Insider trading powerhouse Blackstone has been granted some relief over its scuttled $6.6 Billion acquisition of Alliance Data Systems, and Delaware Chancery Court Judge Leo Strine has ruled they are off the hook for the $170 million break up fee.

To celebrate their new credit rating, insane dictator Robert Mugabe releases new 50 billion note, which is roughly equal to one US dollar.

January 14, 2009

From: Vikram Pandit

Dear Citi Colleagues,

I want to make sure you know that we’ve moved up our Q4 2008 earnings announcement to this coming Friday, January 16. Since we are ready to release 4th quarter earnings and talk about 2009 and the future, we saw no need to wait.

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How the Dow Jones used to make me smile.
And I learned my trade and had my chance
The music played I did my dance
And I made seven figures for a while.
I can't remember if I cried
when they pulled the plug on Countrywide...
It sucks that Iceland is out of ice....
Bye, Bye to my piece of the pie...
Now I travel coach whenever I fly...
Maybe this will be the day that I die.

Despite our assumption that this would be a Southern New York Case, and in fact was a Delaware filing, the overall parameters turned out right.

Conference call with slides in progress...

DETROIT, Jan. 15 /PRNewswire/ -- General Motors today provided an update on company restructuring efforts included in the viability plan submitted to the federal government last month, and announced more conservative industry volume planning assumptions to ensure the viability plan is successful even in the most challenging of markets.