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The Third hedgeless_horseman's 12 Days of Christmas ~ Gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life

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hedgeless_horseman's 12 Days of Christmas ~ Gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life
The Second Annual hedgeless_horseman's 12 Days of Christmas ~ Gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life

The Third hedgeless_horseman's 12 Days of Christmas ~ Gift ideas for the Zero Hedge reader in your life

Giving these first six gifts, and actually reading them, is the best way I know to work for peace on earth, and clearly more effective than just stating, "Peace on Earth," on your Christmas card.

$4   The Law, by Frederic Bastiat

$8   The Qur'an (Oxford World's Classics) by M. A. S. Abdel Haleem

$9   The Bhagavad Gita (Oxford World's Classics) by W. J. Johnson

$15   Buddhist Scriptures (Penguin Classics) by Donald Lopez 

$15   The Jewish Bible: Tanakh: The Holy Scriptures -- The New JPS Translation According to the Traditional Hebrew Text

$23   The New Oxford Annotated Bible with Apocrypha: New Revised Standard Version by Michael D. Coogan

$119   Hoffner Knife Operator Kit 

As mentioned in my article, Guide for Learning to Use a Sidearm to Defend Yourself, Your Loved Ones, and Your Property, Should a Race War Break Out , where I say the following about knives:

I recommend that you begin learning to use a pistol to defend yourself by learning to use a knife to defend yourself.  Why?  Well, first, it is an inexpensive and low-risk way to discover who the good tactical instructors are in your area.  Second, the learning curve for a knife is much shorter, and can also serve to shorten the learning curve for a handgun.  Third, a knife can be more effective than a pistol in many situations.  Fourth, there are many situations when, or where, you simply cannot carry a pistol, but you can carry a knife.  Finally, a knife is a good back-up to a malfunctioning pistol, or more likely a malfunctioning shooter.

 

$190   Soft Star Hawthorne-Zero Drop-Minimalist-Chukka Boots-Made in the USA 

We have worn the run-a-mocs for years.  They are amazing!!!  Now, they make a boot.

In my article, Questions to assist in creating a working inventory of mind, body, and equipment for living in dangerous or uncertain times, some of the questions asked are:

  • Am I able to run for my life for more than a minute?
  • Do I have the strength to manage my own body weight?  For example, can I pull myself up over a six-foot wall?
  • Am I fit enough to perform sexually?
  • Am I able to swim 500+ meters?
  • Am I able to carry myself, my pack, and my weapon up, down, across, over, around, and through obstacles for many miles?

$408 will enable swimming 4-5 days per week for 30+ minutes, and can get almost anyone to a, "yes," on each of the questions in 90 days.

$135   Waterproof iPod - Audioflood
$15   Goggles - Speedo Vanquisher 2.0
$23 - $55   Suit - Speedo Endurance
$235 = $100 + $45/month x 3 months  YMCA membership

$425   What are you going to do when the bombs start to fall?  Grab and Go Supplies for 30 Days in a Fallout Shelter or Basement.  Watch all of the free Tin Hat Ranch videos that are linked in my article to learn how to use this gear.

$40   = $5 x 8 - Stansport Water Bag 2 Gallon
$7   Potable Aqua Water Treatment 50 Tablets
$15   4-Inch Aluminum Pipe Wrench
$30   Starbucks VIA® Ready Brew Italian Roast Coffee (50 count)
$110   Datrex 2400 Emergency Food Bar (case of 30)
$8   Multivitamin (100 count)
$14   =$7x2 iOSAT Potassium Iodide Tablets, 130 mg (14 Tablets)
$20   iRonsnow IS-088 Dynamo Emergency Solar Hand Crank Radio, Flashlight, Charger
$14   Plastic Sheeting 10'x 25' - 6.0 mil Thick Clear
$10   Roll 3M Duct Tape 50 yards
$15   Stansport 6 Chamber Air Mattress
$5   = $2.50 x 2   Victor Metal Pedal Rat Trap
$23   The Complete Works of William Shakespeare
$13   3M 8511 N95 Respirator (10-Pack)
$24   =$8x3 DuPont Tyvek Coverall With Bootie & Hood
$13   3M TEKK Goggle (3-Pack)
$16   West Chester 18" Chemical Resistant Gloves (Pack of 3 Pair)
$11   Wet Ones Antibacterial Hand Wipes Singles 24-Count (Pack of 5)
$5   Coleman Camper's Toilet Tissue (Pack of 3)
$25   Rothco G.I. Style Double-Strap Duffle Bag
$7   Master Lock 4688D Cable Luggage Lock

 

Also, in my article, Questions to assist in creating a working inventory of mind, body, and equipment for living in dangerous or uncertain times, one of the questions asked is:

  • Do I have portable, widely recognized, and durable assets such as gold coins?

$2520   Portable, widely recognized, and durable assets.

$2470   = $123.50 x 20 Canada 1/10 oz Gold Maple Leaf (Random Year)
$50   LL Bean Leather Money Belt   


Finally, if you know someone special that likes the finer things in life, and lives in an area where they may need to defend those finer things...and their life...I offer the following:

$4252   mrs_horseman's recipe for, "Can-of-Whoop-Ass."

$1300   Benelli M2 Tactical Shotgun with Ghost Ring Sights 
$115   Mesa Tactical Urbino® Pistol Grip Stock for Benelli M2, 12½ inch length of pull
$75   Nordic Components +2 Rounds Extenion Tube for Benelli M2
$100   Meprolight Tru-Dot Tritium Sights for Benelli Shotguns with Ghost Ring Sights 
$300 Surefire DSF-M1/M2 LED Forend WeaponLight for Benelli M2
$53 URBAN-SENTRY Hybrid Sling Complete Kit
$132 GG&G M2 Charging Handle & Tac Pad
$40 Urban ERT 30 round shotgun shell belt
$67 8" by 10" Semi-Concealable Style Covert Rifle Plates Carrier
$220 Level IV Stand-Alone Lightweight 10" by 12" Regular Shooters Cut Front
$220 Level IV Stand-Alone Lightweight 10" by 12" Rectangular Back Plate
$430 = 2 x $215 250rds 12 Ga. Winchester Military 2 3/4" 9 Pellet 00 Buckshot
$400 =2 x $200 250rds 12 Gauge Remington Slugger 2 3/4" 1oz. Rifled Slug
$800 =$400 x 2 Weekends of Tactical shotgun class

Merry Christmas!

 

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Tue, 11/24/2015 - 20:53 | 6835488 BKbroiler
BKbroiler's picture

comfortable with my manliness and stature.

Well if you're wearing speedos to go swimming, I guess so.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 20:57 | 6835506 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

 

 

The Speedo Endurance suits are the best.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 22:31 | 6835977 mijev
mijev's picture

Quote from some long forgotten 80s movie where the macho lead ends up having to wear a pink t-shirt and the female lead looks askance at him: "It takes the edge off of my otherwise overbearing masculinity."

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 17:50 | 6834786 hannah
hannah's picture

funny....when the shit actually starts and there isnt running water,power or transportation (food fuel etc), i think the only people thinking about copulation for the first several years will be the monkeys in the #BLM...and they will probably be wiped out in the first year. most people will be dying of exposure and lack of food and bad water. having the squirts really doesnt make good sexy time.

run for a minute or have sex...i think you are really claiming most people have sex for less than a minute...?????!!!

 

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 17:59 | 6834826 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

but we have to have sex to strike a balance with getting fucked all the time

sex is probably all we'll have left

but we'll all have to relearn it without the internet

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 17:53 | 6834806 buzzardsluck
buzzardsluck's picture

I can do both those things in a minute.  If the woman is quick with her arms I could even combine the two activies.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 17:20 | 6834630 hannah
hannah's picture

the qur'an has 500 pages...cheaper than toilet paper. i always keep a copy next to the loo along with the jewish bible.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 17:13 | 6834581 Being Free
Being Free's picture

Nice list! I'll pass this on to Mrs. Free

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 16:42 | 6834366 Lmo Mutton
Lmo Mutton's picture

+1 for Hoffners

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 19:09 | 6834248 SILVERGEDDON
SILVERGEDDON's picture

Dillon reloading equipment. A shit ton of spent brass, shot shells, wads, shot, projectiles, powder, and primers.

The gift that keeps on giving, for life, in shotgun, pistol, or rifle ammo.

I like the Applegate Fairbairn combat folder Gerber put out many moons ago - they show up for way less than a hundred bucks still new in box at shows, on Craigslist, and E-bay all the time.

I would start with all that, and a dozen old Remington 570 shotguns, a dozen Garands, and a dozen 1903 bolt rifles in 30 06. Scope ring up half of the 1903's, and practice iron sights out to 400 yards with the other half dozen. A dozen Beretta 92's as well as a shit ton of OEM mags for same.

Salt kosher for curing, Celtic salt for eating, lots of it, sugar, millet, quinoa, red wheat, chia seeds, rice, kerosene, propane, diesel, etcetera, ad nauseum.

And a partridge in a pear tree.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 20:05 | 6835323 Lumberjack
Lumberjack's picture

1903 bolt rifles in 30 06.

Amen

Wed, 11/25/2015 - 07:54 | 6837136 Arnold
Arnold's picture

I liked my Eddystone.

Incidentally, I'd like it back if y'all are reading this.

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 16:25 | 6834242 RonArgent
RonArgent's picture

Excellent!

Tue, 11/24/2015 - 19:29 | 6835152 Diet Coke and F...
Diet Coke and Floozies's picture

Don't forget this ($0): www.truthcontest.com

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