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Lucky Lucky Girl

Tim Knight from Slope of Hope's picture




 

From Slope of Hope: Over the past 15 years, Yahoo (YHOO) has lost nearly 70% of its peak value (and this is taking into account its utterly and completely lucky gains from Alibaba). During those fifteen years - - and let's remember, on the day of Yahoo's price peak, Mark Zuckerberg was a 15 year-old high school student - - Yahoo has struggled mightily to recapture its lost glory, only to fail again and again, in spite of a series of blonde female CEOs whose principal difference appears to be whether they use profanities in public or not.

As a person who has been online since 1981 (literally), I have a strong sense as to what's good and what isn't so good, and I've always thought Yahoo sucked out loud. It's astonishing to me that they are ever still around. And, in a way, they are not, because their enterprise value was recently calculated as negative thirteen billion dollars.

Now the fact that Marissa Mayer has made her vast fortune by being really, really lucky (first, as an early Google employee, with a key qualification being outlined in this link, and later, as a PR stunt, as the pretty new face of Yahoo) is something that's been covered repeatedly in the hallowed halls of Slope.  However, I saw something earlier this week that just made me roll my eyes again, as the world proved once again how Mayer gets a "pass" on the Yahoo debacle by being consistently fertile (and yes, these are seriously the news headlines for the company):

1211-mayer

I have no problem with people getting fantastically rich by creating value. The tens of billions that Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, Larry Paige, Sergey Brin, and Jeff Bezos have made - - God bless 'em! But Yahoo stumbled onto a good investment with Alibaba (long before Mayer showed up), and because the world happened to go crazy about Chinese internet stocks at just the right time, it saved Yahoo from bankruptcy. And even with this huge advantage, here's the kind of performance Yahoo has seen lately, led by everyone's favorite narcissist:

1211-yhoo

I think the reason she gets a free pass is because people are afraid of appearing sexist. I dismiss this notion based on two important facts: first, that any CEO who had stumbled so badly (and become so rich doing so) deserves scorn, whether they are male, female, or Caitlyn Jenner. And second, if anyone on this planet could be accused of using Marissa Mayer's sexuality with respect to her career, I think one need look no farther than the woman herself:

 

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Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:13 | 6915007 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

Tim, admit it, you got turned down asking for a date.

-Chumblez.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:33 | 6915064 Tim Knight from...
Tim Knight from Slope of Hope's picture

A valid theory, but no. She actually lives just four blocks away from me, and I feel a little bad doing this article since she does Halloween in style, but still - - facts are facts.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 16:27 | 6915216 chumbawamba
chumbawamba's picture

;)

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 17:36 | 6915405 Irish Yoga
Irish Yoga's picture

That old photo reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry dates a woman with "man hands".

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 14:45 | 6914875 highly debtful
highly debtful's picture

Thank you for making an extremely valid point. That is indeed one of the main problems of western society today: we increasingly lie and photoshop our way through life these days. Selfies and likes instead of sincere appreciation for achievement. It's all makeup and make believe. Hell, they could even make me look hotter than Brad Pitt (no lie), while in real life no woman would grant me the benefit of a second look in the street (no lie either).   

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:26 | 6915046 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I am not married to what should be considered a handsome man by today's standards. I have heard him say " Why is someone like you with a man like me?" for years. However, I have never met any man as kind, hard working, intelligent, thoughtful and generous as he.

The truth of the matter is I'm the privileged one to have the love from a man of his caliber. A million Brad Pitt pretty boys would not come close to the joy I get from the smiling face that greets me every day. I don't need a second look to consider my choice.

Miffed

Sun, 12/13/2015 - 05:32 | 6916801 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

I met you and Mr. Miffed.  Compared to him I look like a dried up dog turd.

He's an average guy look.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 18:04 | 6915480 Lucky Leprachaun
Lucky Leprachaun's picture

You're unusual Miffed. Almost all women will say what you say but, driven by mysterious biological imperatives will choose an alpha good-looking cad nine times out of ten. Good to know there are still women like you.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 16:00 | 6915141 Trogdor
Trogdor's picture

However, I have never met any man as kind, hard working, intelligent, thoughtful and generous as he.

Well, good on ya, MM.  You are a rare woman indeed to consider those characteristics "pluses" (as they should be).  Most women today would look at those as character flaws - especially if they made him reliable and less dramatic ... you know ... BORING in woman-speak ....

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 16:30 | 6915227 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Sad. If you are bored, then by definition you are boring if you need something outside of yourself to keep you entertained. Maybe I just enjoy being with a man as he is and don't see any reason to change him.

We have become a vacuous society. It is destroying us on so many levels to the most basic interactions of the sexes. Men are naturally providers and protectors of women. They are being spat upon and they no longer wish to do so. I empathize with their plight and can offer no criticism. In the future, many will learn a hard lesson.

Miffed

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 23:00 | 6916330 Lost in translation
Lost in translation's picture

You never fail to give me hope, miffed. God bless you.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 18:06 | 6915487 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

You really do appear to be an unusual person, Miffed. Did you have a conventional upbringing?

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 23:05 | 6916342 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

Maybe. I was born to very intelligent and well educated, upper middle class parents. My father was an entrepreneur, very shy and cerebral, a self made man. He taught me the importance of sound money and PMs. I was devoted to him. My mother was one of the most intelligent women I ever known but, unfortunately, was mentally ill. When my father died suddenly, we were plunged quickly into poverty and almost became homeless. I worked two jobs at 16 to support my brother, mother and grandmother. I was the shy girl hiding in the shadows in high school while all the other girls were dating and having fun. I had too much on my shoulders to be in their world. Then one day a young Mr Miffed sat next to me and tried to get to know me. He brought food from his farm seeing what dire straits I was in. He helped me deal with my suicidal brother and my now violent mother. After a few years, he asked to marry me though his family threatened to disown if he did. Once I got my brother safe, I agreed.He lost everything because of me. The ultimate sacrifice. He was 22. There is no man I respect as much as I do my husband. He gave up so much for me and I am so grateful.

A few years ago my mother died institutionalized as certified violently insane. My brother is doing well and has cried in my arms thankful I had saved him from suicide when it would have been a terrible mistake. We both have been through a lot.

I don't know how much influence in a person's life is nature or nurture. I was blessed with a good education and opportunities many did not have. I also had many hardships, including infirmaties I am suffering from numerous beatings. Maybe both together built the character of who I am today. In any case, I am very grateful for my life and will always be an empathetic soul to those who suffer in this cold world as I did.

Miffed

Sun, 12/13/2015 - 00:27 | 6916500 acetinker
acetinker's picture

Am I the only one who thinks that Miffed Microbiolost is fulla shit, and a total scam?

Just a few months ago, she tugged on our heartstrings claiming that her stud husband was deathly ill...

Now, it's all about her, AGAIN!

Will you stupid fuckers never learn?

Sun, 12/13/2015 - 05:41 | 6916807 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

I've met them, personally.  They're straight up, normal, ordinary people who have fucked up shit come up from time to time, from out of left field.  Sounds like things are looking better, at least for now, for Mr. Miffed (hopefully).

Real people have actual swings in their circumstances (god knows I do) and moods.  So don't be so fucking harsh.

Mon, 12/14/2015 - 00:00 | 6920185 acetinker
acetinker's picture

Yeah OldPhart; I've never had a bad day, or week, or month, year or decade my entire fucking life, so I just can't empathize with the trials and tribulations of the 'common folk' who decry the un-fairness of gov't, while deriving all or part of their sustenance from... gov't.

Harsh indeed.

What?  You thought laboratories were privately funded?

I know you're not a bad guy, and Miffed is not a bad girl.  You're just fulla shit- and that's another issue, altogether.

Mon, 12/14/2015 - 03:33 | 6920621 OldPhart
OldPhart's picture

Agree.

But I'm honestly full of shit.  I don't hide it.

Mon, 12/14/2015 - 23:44 | 6924487 acetinker
acetinker's picture

Ain't we all?  Nothin' to hide here, either.

Thanks for your candor.

Mon, 12/14/2015 - 03:14 | 6920613 MisterMousePotato
MisterMousePotato's picture

Um ... That is not a conventional upbringing, Miffed.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 18:05 | 6915482 Lucky Leprachaun
Lucky Leprachaun's picture

Your husband's a lucky man.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:53 | 6915117 mkkby
mkkby's picture

It has been well documented that men are attracted to feminine looks, while women are attracted to masculine personality traits. 

So both comments about not-so handsome men getting women isn't at all surprising.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 16:16 | 6915195 Miffed Microbio...
Miffed Microbiologist's picture

I've seen plenty of gorgeous women dumped by men. Clearly good looks may attract them but something else determines if they're kept.

Miffed;-)

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 19:03 | 6915655 Bring the Gold
Bring the Gold's picture

Does your husband make six-figures or more? Is he physically imposing? Women marrying for looks is actually fairly rare until recent times with women sometimes being breadwinners of the family. Men seek sexually healthy partners to mate with (read physical attractiveness usually based on symmetry and hip to waist ratio and/or secondary sexual characteristics) women rate security in the form of resources or brawn significantly higher than physical attractiveness. No shame in it. Just biology. Now if you earn as much or more than your husband than you truly are the rare woman who goes for a different set of traits. As a male I have definitely favored looks followed by intelligence and then worldview as my most important considerations. This is after deal breakers of honesty, communication and trustworthiness which are non-negotiable and do not lie on a sliding scale like my preferences. It's just biology. Nothing wrong with it and we need to stop mocking people who objectify women or gold dig for men, unless of course our own noses are clean because we have risen above biology. In the frame of an ice age hunter gatherer situation sexual objectification of woman and resource/security seeking from men just plain makes sense.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 23:37 | 6916414 acetinker
acetinker's picture

Oh c'mon now.  Real men favor risk, intrigue, and yes... dare I say it, freedom to fail.

Real women want security, stability, and assurance that their world is safe while maintaining their option to gossip about those un-luckier than themselves.

I can't speak for the rest of the world, but from where I'm sitting, none of us can give women what they want.  Nor should we even try to.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 17:02 | 6915325 Trogdor
Trogdor's picture

I've seen plenty of gorgeous women dumped by men. Clearly good looks may attract them but something else determines if they're kept.

 

I've done that. I've always said that looks will get you in the door but personality pays the rent. Lots of pretty people are pretty damned ugly on the inside. Attractiveness (in both genders) tends to suppress development of personality ... but some people keep looking for that Unicorn ;)

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 17:38 | 6914930 sgorem
sgorem's picture

well hell 'debtful, have one helluva lonely merry Christmas at least, ugly..........>SARCASM<

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 13:25 | 6914682 brown_hornet
brown_hornet's picture

These are some pretty hot pics. Is she the one in charge of the libtard leanings on Yahoo news?

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:39 | 6915077 dchang0
dchang0's picture

No, that would be the Obama admin. All the big tech companies are tight with Obama--just look at how many times Google's visited the White House while he's been in office. It's probably higher than the number of times REPUBLICAN CONGRESSMEN have been invited to the White House.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 16:37 | 6915249 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

No company has more Bilderberg members than Google, not even Goldman Sachs.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:53 | 6915116 Consuelo
Consuelo's picture

 

 

Which blows gaping holes in (but comes as no surprise), the old saw that the Democrat Party is the party of the 'working man'.    But they still ply the old Roosevelt/Ted Kennedy class-envy bullshit because it works like a charm on each and every up & coming generation of fools.

 

 

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 18:08 | 6915497 Lucky Leprachaun
Lucky Leprachaun's picture

Bit like the "Labour" Party in Britain.  White working-class dolts vote for them in droves even though they're held in utter contempt by that party's trendy leadership.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 15:59 | 6915139 mkkby
mkkby's picture

I actually worked for yahoo once thru a small company that was acquired. 

Never did I see a more dysfunctional org.  People we needed work from would spend the whole day taking cigarette breaks, and it was apparent that they didn't know how to do their jobs. 

I immediately sold my stock options and got the fuck out.  I've got better things to do with my time.  12 years later the stock has never been that high again.

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 18:22 | 6915534 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Googirl...

Is it just my patriarchal, chauvinist, lecherous, decrepit mind or does that title seem to be a bit on the risqué side?

 

Well, it might explain that fertility thing.

 

Sat, 12/12/2015 - 14:47 | 6914929 TahoeBilly2012
TahoeBilly2012's picture

Nothot.com

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!