Caption Contest: "And Then I Said Obamacare Would Lower Insurance Costs"
"Comedians" in cars...
or driving Miss 'Crazy'?
(17 votes)
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"...and then we got the idiots to vote for a guy named Barry Dunham Satoro Barack Hussain Obama......twice!"
"Michelle thinks i am straight and the kids think I am their father"
"How'd you get those kids, Barry?
" The same adoption agency the Clintons used to adopt Webster Hubbell's daughter".
SCUMBAGS!
And then Michael Richards got pissed off and started calling everyone on the crowd a nigger.
I'm from the government and I'm here to help you.
And then Bibi says, he says, if you go ahead with this Iran deal, you won't believe this, he says, I won't be your friend anymore.
Jerry: i'd like to bam bam schlong you right here, right now.
And then I said, "We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek."
"these people are so dumb i could win a third term"
You wanna put your what in where?
"Then we gave Yellen the job"
Obama: ...and then I said "I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States." ... I'm telling you Jerry, I could barely keep a stright face!
"Hey, did you hear about the diplomat from the Israel Embassy in Singapore using Singapore's flag as a tablecloth during a party he hosted?" (for real)
http://www.jns.org/news-briefs/2015/12/31/israel-apologizes-after-diplom...
"And then they elected me AGAIN!"
"Hope and change!"
yo, yo, yo.....and then.....and then, get this......yo, Then i told them them that "If they have a business, THEY didnt build that, somebody else made that happen".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKjPI6no5ng
[Dubai's burning tower receding in the back window]
OBAMA: "And they THOUGHT they'd got away with 9/11!"
"[Dubai's burning tower receding in the back window]"
Dubai has better Jewish Lightning codes
Nice 63 Vette, Jerry. I hear Pappy Bush drove this one out of a Dallas showroom, Nov 23.
so a Muslim and a Jew are riding together in a car...
Grimace and Stroke
I always wanted to be in a show about nothing.... and now I am!
Actually it's about our personal aggrandizement.
Driver drives over Trump.
Driver backs up & drives over him again.
"...and then I said yes we can over and over and over again and that was it, that was all it took...and then, then, shit man, I don't...you know I don't even remember half of the bullshit I promised but it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter cause every time I go on vacation it costs like ten million dollars...ten million and I get away with it cause I'm the president so...yes we can, we can spend all your money bitchez".
"but wait, wait it gets better, I mean Obama care right? shit, obamacare I don't know a damn thing about that mess, people think I read that bullshit, hell no, somebody dropped that shit on my desk with a check...a check and it was like "get it done" and then hit the links bitchez. but read it? that shit is like 2,000 pages long, fuck that, I got 18 more holes to play, I think I read the first two pages... but I already forgot what they said. even with that I wasn't sure you know? I wasn't 100% sure that I could win again, so you know what I did..well, I know you know...I went and blew up another country with some brown people in it. I had to go to Hillary...I went to Hillary and asked her which one, which camel jockey sand pit should I go after and she suggested Libya, so I did."
"and it worked, shit if you blow up some folks you get re-elected, doesn't matter how much other bullshit you pull or how many promises you brake, just bomb some shit and these dumb motherfuckers will put you right back in that chair"
"shit man if I bomb Russia you think they will let me run again? hey, lets try it and find out".
"Hell, even I almost believed that shit on the teleprompter."
O: ok, ok, ok...here's one...I got a Whitehouse petition that said: "Black lives madder." And that's it, nothing else.
Then I wrote back: "Drunk, fat and stupid ain't no way to go through life son."
S: And, now they're really pissed!"
I shit. Me too!
So then I ask Netanyahu, "What's a schwartze?"
After getting dressed to appear on Ellen 'Michael' asked me ........'Does my DICK look BIG in THIS" ?? !!
O: "Then they found out I was Kenyan. But the funny thing is, I'm not really Kenyan. I had those birth documents forged as well."
"If you like your plan, you can keep your plan"
"I applied for a job as a dish washer in the WhiteHouse...And look what happened - Twice!"
So, with a straight face, I said "Bruce, I think it's a great idea if you chop your dick off"
Print baby Print.
"And then I said, congratulations Libya on your three years of independence"
"And then I said, Congratulations Iraq on bringing peace and stability to the country"
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahah
"They all think I'm the bad boy. I can't wait until they get a load of Donald Trump."
you probably can't wait until you get a load from obama
So when Kerry complained the Iranian negotiator yelled at him every day, we gave $150 billion to Iran and then split up the rest.
"No seriously, I thought that Kramer improv was hilarious!"
Seinfeld hangs out with Oboner? Fuck you Seinfeld, I'll never watch anything you do ever. You suck ass Seinfeld.
Too be honest, I think this was probably a White House PR stunt. Let's not forget this show is one of the most popular online with around 100 million viewers worldwide.
Most probably Jerry's secretary received a call from Obama's secretary, informing her The President of the USA would like to be a guest.
And Seinfeld duly complied, as anyone with sense would do. Seinfeld is aware this is all a sham. Most comediants are. I remember him one time talking about the experience of trying to pay a some item with a large bill, and the store not accepting it. To which he said something like "we all participating in this mass illusion that this piece of paper is worth money, so why don't you go ahead and accept it".
adam wud ceated black...we be know dat cuz evah try ta takes d'ribs fum a nigrow?
"I then I said I won't cum in your mouth Denny"
ah heck, now that i've got nothing to lose, it's Section 8 All The Way. Everyone is getting a new house!
(Ya'll think this is a joke, joke's on you! Just talked to a Section 8 person who is getting one of those houses "foreclosed" on in the mortgage crisis...since they refuse to lower prices *here the realtors Howl*, they've got to give them away...and ya'll recall the women who ran out to get her son and beat him over the head; they were gonna interview here but she said she didn't have a job and she'd just moved into her new home. you putzs think you have to work!)
the reason that American Health care costs have no ceiling is not because of government and not because of health care companies.
The reason Americans pay more for health care than any other nation on the planet is because Americans have been trained by the health care system to enjoy being, or to need to be sick all their lives.
Preventive Health Care is the kryptonite of the American Health Care Scam (AHCS) Monopoly. Preventive health care is cheap by comparison.
That means you exercise and eat right and take responsibility for your life to stay healthy so that you do not use the AHCS, except in an emergency.
American Doctors and the AHCS NEED you to be sick. They don't make any money if you're not sick.
If you don't feed the beast it will die. The same is true of the AHCS.
When Americans decide to take back their health and the responsibility for it then the putrifying AHCS will implode on itself.
Hint: Got Hot Yoga?
.....and I was awarded with the Nobel Peace Price.
"So I sez to Kerry ... I sez ... 'Why the long face?'"
BWAAAHAAAAHAAAAHAAAAHAAAA
(Help, I'm peeing in my pants)
BWAAAHAAAAHAAAANAAAAHAAAA
Jerry said, "what the fuck is that? That little piece of gristle is your dick?" Ahahahahahaha