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Northern Ireland Man Thrown In Prison After Attempting To Turn Crap Into Gold
We take advantage of this brief lull in the European panic headline blasting for a comic interlude, presented without comment.
From Yahoo News:
Man jailed after trying to turn faeces into gold
A man from Northern Ireland has been jailed after an experiment in which he attempted to turn his own faeces into gold went wrong and started a fire in a block of flats.
Paul Moran will now serve three months in jail and a further 12 months on license after the failed experiment caused a fire at his Housing Executive home in Derrin Park, Enniskillen.
Moran admitted arson and endangering the lives of others in the fire, which reportedly caused over £3,000 worth of damage.
It is thought that as part of the bizarre experiment Moran left his faeces, along with other waste products such as fertiliser, on a heater.
In his ruling Judge McFarland told Moran: “Rather bizarrely you were attempting to make gold from human faeces and waste products.
“It was an interesting experiment to fulfil the alchemist’s dream, but wasn’t going to succeed.”
Moran’s barrister mentioned that his client was a man of ‘considerable intellectual ability’ but that he had problems battling drug abuse
Take it away...
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Come on dude, you ain't Bernanke baby!
In US Bankers turn Dollars in to Shit
Arrest Them
Feces?
I thought that was Tim Geithner's zodiac sign.
Too funny. Reminded me of this:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/japan/4429197/Japans-sewe...
Truth IS stranger than fiction. I don't understand their one-line explaination of where it all comes from, but whatever.
Blythe masters intern?
This is why Merkel and Sarko are saying the EU summit this weekend won't deliver anything. Poop to Gold was their secret weapon.
He was only doing God's work.
Expect an Amerikan to try the same thing any day now with feces, beer cans and McDonald's cartons...
It's possible! I've done it before.
I started off with some really good fresh crap, it HAS to be fresh. I added a little bit of fertilizer, for heat. I also added a few gold coins and some old broken gold jewlery, only as a catalyst, so as to speed up the process.
I heated up really hot, for a good long time.
I finally ended up with some decent gold nuggets. Not alot. Perhaps enough for a few coins with some left over.
Pretty cool stuff.
Northern Ireland is part of the UK, so not (generally) considered "European" but "British".
The currency is also GBP.
Much like the US, our banking system is somewhat more transparent and simply resorts to printing money rather than dressing it up as "EFSF" and "leverage".
I guess they figure it's not worth the effort of hiding what they are doing when we have people shitting in buckets to create gold.
Crap, over here he would be a candidate for the Senate.
Great! I hope this works, then maybe the elite will hold off on their planned famines for a while so they can turn our shit into gold.
The day will come when GS, MS, HSBC, et al will attempt to turn paper into gold, and TPTB will allow it. I'm guessing lead packed in some brass will be darn near as good as gold then.
See what you get when you stick your Tungsten up someone else's ass?!
'buy shit. target 1600'
Looks like he was trying to do what only policymakers can do with the help of their alchemist friends aka central bankers.
It's already having an effect on the market...
http://i671.photobucket.com/albums/vv76/duffelpud/crapisup.jpg
Reminds of the joke about the Irishman who was caught with a piece of shit in his luggage as he was coming through customs. When asked where he got it from his reply was " I won it in a craps game in Vegas".
No one has said it yet:
HOLY SHIT!
Damn fool. You can't eat gold.
The man said, in his own defense, "If the banksters can do it, why not me!"
I hope this doesn't cause a run in the shit markets