Obama Addresses America's Illegal Aliens, Bypasses Congress

Tyler Durden's picture

Obama is about to address (as of 1:15 pm Eastern, so the sandtrap was obviously a monster) America's illegal immigrants, and critical Hispanic vote, advising them he has successfully avoided this pest known as Congress, and that henceforth not all of them will be deported. The immigrants that is, not Congress... although that too may change. Because remember: the only thing better than record part-time jobs is recorder part-time jobs. Also remember: one can't affix a price to securing the vote... of those who are ineligible to vote.

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TheCanimal's picture

Obama is horrible.  Sadly, i doubt Romney will be any different:  More illegal immigration, more wars, more money printing, more crony capitalism, more too big to fail bailouts, more inflation.

NotApplicable's picture

They call that "peaceful transition of power."

I call it "same shit, different asshole."

Kobe Beef's picture

You're right, but Romney POTUS means no Eric Holder AG. That's enough for me.

fuu's picture


ebworthen's picture

"If you are a citizen, we are making sure you can't leave and your assets are ours.  If you aren't a citizen please come and visit for a while and make use of all those services citizens are taxed out the ass for; and we need your cheap labor and inability to get a fair wage, overtime, or sue for being treated like slaves."

SeverinSlade's picture

Obama's a little on edge today.  Wonder why.

Maybe because he's about to find out if he's going to be re-elected? 

If the Fed doesn't announce QE3 on the 20th and merely extends Twist =>>>> Obama loses to Romney.

Fed announces QE3 on the 20th =>>>>> Obama beats Romney.

Maybe he already knows that Bernanke will do nothing in about a week?

Watts_D_Matter's picture

Does that mean Uncle Bongo and Zetuni stay? Dam.... Well I'll be a monkeys uncle!

Kobe Beef's picture

Bring your family. Here's a free house and cell phone.

larry david's picture

obama: this is NOT the time for questions!


immediately after speech ends, he walks the fuck away.  made me lol.  

slewie the pi-rat's picture

the illegals have already left in droves

this is just to remind them to apply for absentee ballots

CURWAR2012's picture

Bad direction, he looked nervous (as he should be)

GrinandBearit's picture

After 3 years of pondering, I have concluded that president Obama is satan.

Satan's picture

I am so deeply offended.

Chaos_Theory's picture

You owe me a keyboard, monitor and another Mountain Dew...

CaptainObvious's picture

You can have another Mountain Dew IF AND ONLY IF it has a unit measurement of less than 16 ounces.

  --Nanny Bloomberg

Chaos_Theory's picture

Damn...that was the ZH equivalent of "checkmate."

The Navigator's picture

AND ONLY you write it off as a thingmagig (or Chingamadera) costing $3,000 - otherwise, not an acceptable IRS write-off.

mick_richfield's picture

If you think Obama is smart enough to be Satan, you are seeing a much different Obama than I am.

Obama works for the political guy, who works for the money guys, who work for the serious money guys, who work for the spooky guys, who work for Satan.

NotApplicable's picture

Spooky guys are the two popes, right?

mick_richfield's picture

The really spooky guys are guys you have never heard of.

Powerful people are not famous.  Famous people are servants.

slewie the pi-rat's picture

i'm from that pirate ship and i'm here to help

the hierarchy of spookery:  yup the servants are spooks, the famous people are spooks and the powerful people are spooks

blame it on the bossa nova?  you'll find when you reach the top:  you're on the bottom... 

when i first landed here i was impressed by the boilerplate about the black helis and this  manifesto

clothing optional...

verum quod lies's picture

Yes, I agree; and yet, incredibly stupid and arrogant, even while reading the teleprompter. It would seem the underworld believes all can be solved with a speechwriter and a teleprompter.


newworldorder's picture

Not to put too fine a point on this but due to our current Affirmative Action Laws, anyone who gains an authorization to work under this program in the US and is defined as minority moves to the head of the line for consideration on employment, education, etc.

While these young people are deserving of a chance to live their American dream, all minority non US citizens will more than likely be given opportunities FIRST before non minority citizens and in many cases othe minoirity citizens.

That we as a country approve this under the guise of multiculturalism is byond comprehension. Where is Congress on this issue? Where is the debate in the MSM ? Where are American born minorites on this issue?

AnAnonymous's picture

US citizenism has done such a wonderful job that the first black US citizen president is not a guy from the black US citizen communauty but a first generation citizenship holder whose father is an African.

Success of US citizenism humanity advancement program. Even negro culture beat it.

Tells it all.

akak's picture

Please tell us again your fairy tale about how the inhabitants of Easter Island were somehow infected by your mythical "US Citizenism" not only long before they had ANY contact with the outside world, but literally centuries before the USA was even founded as a nation! I really like that one.

AnAnonymous's picture

'Americanism' is a myth. 'Americans' are a myth. They do not exist.

Easier to understand the whole stuff of conspiracy theory when US citizens are so easy in denying their own existence.

The Navigator's picture


I see you can spell words, and then assemble them into sentences, but the sentences have no meaning. A dictionary is useful but it doesn't mean you can speak or write in that language.

Please seek some assistance in assembling words into meaningful sentences.

AnAnonymous's picture

Meaning sentences?

So I cant assemble words into meaningful sentences which means or does not mean that the current sentence is a meaningful sentence.

US citizen logics. Once again.

LFMayor's picture

keep trying to piss us off and you just might accidentally do it.  Then we'll cut your food off.  And your sea lanes.  and then you, along with the whole of entire southern hemisphere excluding Oz will eat one another.

for real, ask your masters and you'll know the truth from the nervous looks on their faces.

Rong Pohk, and all that good shit.

PS, you still have those SKS's that your buddy managed to swipe from the norinco factory, right?  the ones they lost track of when the clintons put that import ban down back in the 90's and it created that big paperwork mess when the shipments got canceled. you're going to need those pretty soon I think.

ffart's picture

I don't think this guy is actually chinese but whatever. He seems to have the same malthusian viewpoint as ORI, who is another troll on this board. They like to pat each other's backs too.

akak's picture

Oh, he/she/they is/are most definitely Chinese --- you must have missed the part where he/she/they spun the fantasy of how the Red Chinese "liberated" Tibet and "ended slavery" there.  Not to mention his/her/their kneejerk defense of every vile crime of Mousy Tongue and the Chinese Communist Party, not the least of which being the political purges and psychotic "Great Leap Forward (Into Starvation)" of the 1950s, in which Mao killed tens of millions of his own countrymen in the greatest mass murder of a population by its own leaders in recorded history.

Besides, the writing style of this freak should be a dead giveaway --- haven't you EVER been mystified by the identical garbled and cryptic prose contained within any Chinese-made product manual?

It is the mettle of the insanitation of Chinese Citizenism citizens to denialize their blobbing-up of resources and offuscation of historical facts in the fabled quest to seduce the world into sharing their People's Liberation Opium Parlor fantasies.

CompassionateFascist's picture

 Anonymous temporarily subdued...but not by us. Nearby food vendor has special on puppy cutlets.

AnAnonymous's picture

All credible from one US citizen whose hubris is such that he thinks he can get away with denying the existence of 'Americanism'

US citizens are pampered by their government state, allowing them to dismiss the most immediate reality.

Dont wish for the state to end too strong. If it happens, you will come face to face with reality and it is too different from what you like to fancy on to make you any good.

headless blogger's picture

They are trolls and this one is from Toronto. They monopolize the site called InformationClearinghouse.info (ran by their American counterpart, Tom Feeley, who may be from Ireland, UK).

They comment heavily on Antiwar.com, Truthdig.com, Truthout.com, TheDailyBell.com (until they shut their comment section down), and many other sites. Goal seems to be to smear all Americans and to destroy American "White" culture. They think EVERY American is stupid, racist, and pro-war. 

Also, one of them operates the site called DangerousCreations.com

Either they are crazy fucks, or they are working for someone. They are CONSTANTLY on the internet. I read alot of the Antiwar and truth sites, and after a while you can tell who they are.

AnAnonymous's picture

He seems to have the same malthusian viewpoint as ORI,


A malthusian viewpoint? I have one?

And in what way would it differ from the malthusian viewpoint expressed by so many US citizens on this site?

AnAnonymous's picture

keep trying to piss us off and you just might accidentally do it. Then we'll cut your food off. And your sea lanes. and then you, along with the whole of entire southern hemisphere excluding Oz will eat one another.

for real, ask your masters and you'll know the truth from the nervous looks on their faces.

Rong Pohk, and all that good shit.

Who is that we? Is a collectivistic construction similar to that US citizen We the People?

If you had any power of the kind you claim to have through collective association, you wont be lamenting your way on this site.

Better, your position in here, your loss of faith in the actuality of your membership to the US citizen gang, your whim to see a change in US citizenism other than your change in status indicates that you are going to be among people who are going to go through that kind of treatment by that 'we'

akak's picture

More time-traveling algebraic coconut hobnobbing gibberish from the ragingly prejudiced anti-American Chinese Firster.

Don't you have a Middle Kingdom roadside to shit up?  There must be a few spots left uncovered  in deng by your fellow quasi-human post-puppy-gorging Chinese Citizenism citizens.

kralizec's picture

Obadictator's treason goes unchallenged again...this is how a republic dies...to thunderous silence...

Bob's picture

Problem is the way these so-called wedge issues divide us. For example, how does a "libertarian" object to this? 

Gays, abortion, the social contract (not that it actually exists), all this bullshit is part of the circus. 

tongue.stan's picture

That last question shouted out by an obviously soon to be NDAA'd journalist was so right on: "what about the american workers...?" This POS POTUS turned his back. We are doomed. He's a tin pot dictator. We are ruled by a so callled black muslim kenyan marxist.

Bob's picture

Actually, you were on a roll there, but in order to legitimately invoke the concept of "so-called," you would necessarily be alluding to a reasonably credible authority for the charge that he's a "black muslim kenyan marxist." 

Nuff said.