It's been a week and Nobel Peace Prize-winning President Obama is ready to unveil the ISIS strategy. It appears the plan is to provide arms and training to 'moderate' Syrian rebels (remember the same ones that 'were' moderate and became extreme thanks to being well-armed) at a cost of at least $5bn, save hearts and minds in Iraq (with some more humanitarian shipments), and impose sanctions (yes, Treasury said efforts against ISIS will include finances). No boots-on-the-ground (just advisors) and we are sure some Syrian bombing (whether or not they agree) and do not forget - this is a long-standing commitment...
Last week...
President Barack Obama vowed Friday to “degrade and ultimately destroy” the militants of ISIS — an organization that he said was too dangerous to be simply contained. “You can’t contain an organization that is running roughshod through that much territory, causing that much havoc, displacing that many people, killing that many innocents, enslaving that many women,” he said. “The goal has to be to dismantle them.”
As NBC News reports,
Obama will make a prime-time address Wednesday evening to warn the nation that Islamic militants pose a threat to U.S. national security and that the American people should expect the fight against the terror group will require a longstanding commitment, according to the White House.
And now... some excerpts:
Obama to say US will lead coalition to "degrade & ultimately destroy #ISIS [12] through comprehensive & sustained counter-terrorism strategy" >>
— Jon Williams (@WilliamsJon) September 10, 2014 [13]
In excerpts released by WH, Obama says #ISIS [12] different to #Iraq [14] & #Afghanistan [15]. "Will not involve US combat troops fighting on foreign soil"
— Jon Williams (@WilliamsJon) September 10, 2014 [16]
As per The White House, Excerpts of the President’s Address to the Nation
As Prepared for Delivery
“So tonight, with a new Iraqi government in place, and following consultations with allies abroad and Congress at home, I can announce that America will lead a broad coalition to roll back this terrorist threat. Our objective is clear: we will degrade, and ultimately destroy, ISIL through a comprehensive and sustained counter-terrorism strategy.”
…
“But I want the American people to understand how this effort will be different from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. It will not involve American combat troops fighting on foreign soil. This counter-terrorism campaign will be waged through a steady, relentless effort to take out ISIL wherever they exist using our air power and our support for partner forces on the ground. This strategy of taking out terrorists who threaten us, while supporting partners on the front lines, is one that we have successfully pursued in Yemen and Somalia for years.”
Here is The Onion's take [17] on what the President will say...
Previewing tonight’s televised prime-time address to the nation, White House aides confirmed that President Obama will reassure Americans that the impending military campaign against ISIS will be the exact same type of open-ended, drawn-out conflict that they are used to.
“The president recognizes that citizens may be uneasy about this operation, and that’s why he will use tonight’s speech to comfort the American public by reminding them that they have been through armed engagements without clear end dates or even concrete objectives plenty of times before, and that this case is no different,” said senior White House advisor Daniel Pfeiffer, adding that the president will assuage viewers’ concerns by laying out precisely how the U.S. will mire itself in the same old quagmire that citizens have grown accustomed to over the years.
“The president’s message is clear: This will be just another one of our routine intractable engagements in the region—it’s going to be unending, it’s going to be expensive, and it’s going to affect our credibility within the international community. There will not be any surprises for folks to worry about.”
Pfeiffer added that by the end of Obama’s speech, Americans should be able to rest easy and just let this situation play out like they know it will.
Live Feed - President Obama is due to speak at 9pmET (tune in accordingly)...
The National Security Council do not seem convinced...
[18]
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Finally, here is The Moderate Syrian Rebel Application Form (from Andy Borowitz, who appears to have read our mind, [19]and is breathtakingly simple.)
Welcome to the United States’ Moderate Syrian Rebel Vetting Process. To see if you qualify for $500 million in American weapons, please choose an answer to the following questions:
As a Syrian rebel, I think the word or phrase that best describes me is:
A) Moderate
B) Very moderate
C) Crazy moderate
D) Other
I became a Syrian rebel because I believe in:
A) Truth
B) Justice
C) The American Way
D) Creating an Islamic caliphate
If I were given a highly lethal automatic weapon by the United States, I would:
A) Only kill exactly the people that the United States wanted me to kill
B) Try to kill the right people, with the caveat that I have never used an automatic weapon before
C) Kill people only after submitting them to a rigorous vetting process
D) Immediately let the weapon fall into the wrong hands
I have previously received weapons from:
A) Al Qaeda
B) The Taliban
C) North Korea
D) I did not receive weapons from any of them because after they vetted me I was deemed way too moderate
I consider ISIS:
A) An existential threat to Iraq
B) An existential threat to Syria
C) An existential threat to Iraq and Syria
D) The people who will pick up my American weapon after I drop it and run away
Complete the following sentence. “American weapons are…”
A) Always a good thing to randomly add to any international hot spot
B) Exactly what this raging civil war has been missing for the past three years
C) Best when used moderately
D) Super easy to resell online
Thank you for completing the Moderate Syrian Rebel Application Form. We will process your application in the next one to two business days. Please indicate a current mailing address where you would like your weapons to be sent. If there is no one to sign for them we will leave them outside the front door.
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That should clear any questions up...
