Jim Cramer

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Most. Expensive. Market. Ever





Are stocks cheap? Is the 'Stock-Market' "priced-for-perfection"? Here is your answer...

 
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Damn It, Janet!





Speaking of policy errors...

 
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Cupertino, We Have A Problem: China's JD.Com Just Cut Prices On Apple Products By 17%





JD.com cut prices of Apple products on the internet marketplace by as much as 17%, according to information on the JD website. Customers can also purchase Apple products in 12 monthly installments with no interest charges and no downpayment." Among the discounts, iPad Air tablet with 16GB memory is priced at CNY 2,399 (USD 365), compared with CNY 2,888 on the Apple online store in China. The iPhone 6s Plus handset with 64GB memory is priced at CNY 6,288, compared with the official price of CNY 6,888.

 
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"No Brainer" Apple Extends Losses Despite Analyst Pleas That Guidance "Better Than Feared"





Apple's guidance was considerably worse than expected, but always spinning positively, analysts proclaim somehows that it was "better than feared." It appears not as AAPL is now down almost 4% despite every sell-side analyst's pleas that "the bottom is in." The ultimate "no brainer" stock is now down over 28% from its highs last year and analyst targets are still at $137 on average - a nearly 50% gain from here. And finally, as if a crashing stock was not enough, Apple's Safari browser is reportedly crashing if users attempt to search - not a great day for Tim Cook.

 
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Futures Slide On Apple Disappointment, Oil Slumps Ahead Of Fed Decision





"Nobody is really sure where we go from here, and nobody is brave enough to make the call,” Peter Dixon, Commerzbank AG’s global equities economist in London told Bloomberg. “Corporate earnings season won’t provide much of a support - markets may find a floor if the Fed is extremely dovish tonight. At least investors will have time to think and reassess valuations."

 
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The Fragile Forty & How The World Lost $17 Trillion In 6 Months





It's official. More than 50% of the "wealth" effect created from the 2011 lows to the 2015 highs has been destroyed (despite the world's central banks going into money-printing overdrive over that period). Almost $17 trillion of equity market capitalization has evaporated in just over 6 months with over 40 global stock indices in bear markets...

 
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"Manic Depressive" Market Needs "Wholesale Panic" Before It Bottoms





"The market is manic depressive and it swings from seeing only the positives to seeing only the negatives," notes the world’s biggest distressed-debt investor, Howard Marks, but for now, as Bloomberg reports, the extremes (in risk pricing and sentiment) that usually signal opportunity (or capitulation) are not present. As Guggenheim's Scott Minerd warns, "wholesale panic" is what's needed before the market turns, and as RBS notes, "1,800 might come pretty quick."

 
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Was That The Capitulation? Not Even Close





Is it different this time?

 
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Cramer Does It Again: Camera-On-A-Stick Crashes 30% After Slashing Guidance, Cuts 7% Of Jobs





Who could have seen this coming? Week after the CEO ordered his mega-yacht and 6 months after Jim Cramer said "it was going higher," GoPro has just slashed Q4 revenue guidance by 15% (from $510.9mm to $435mm) and has addtionally decided to layoff 7% of the workforce. For now, GPRO is halted... but Ambarella is not (and is collapsing 6% after hours) leaving them down 65-80% since Cramer said "buy buy buy."

 
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President Obama's Final State Of The Union Address - Live Feed





As President Obama prepares to unleash his final State Of The Union speech, The White House has conveniently focused attention on the following six "success stories": The Economy (record low number of men in workforce), The Climate (too hot for retail, too cold for construction), Foreign Policy (bwuahahaha), Health Care (record number of Americans cutting back to afford medical costs), and Social Progress (record high racial tensions, police state, surveillance state,  and record low trust in government). But apart from that, Americans have The Kardashians, iGadgets, record levels of syphillis, and, of course, a record surge in national debt during any President's "reign."

 
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What Makes The World Go Around (In 2 Uncomfortably Truthful Charts)





It's not the economy (or fundamentals), stupid - It's The Fed!

 
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Jim Cramer Is Too Busy To Think





Jim Cramer is so imbricated within the strictures of CNBC, so enamored of his guests, so genuflective and collegial that he has no critical distance to see the flaws of the very system of which he is a part. People like Cramer who are so invested (literally and figuratively) in the current financial system are loathe to realize that it is farcical, that it is built on toothpicks, that the corporate and government numbers are cooked, that the ‘recovery’ is a joke, that the ‘markets’ are rigged by central banks, that wrongdoing is epidemic, that there are no longer any rational connections between prices and fundamentals, that we have passed beyond reality into fantasyland. Cramer is the embodiment of a society awash in information but starved in meaning.

 
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