Apple

Courtesy of Jalopnik comes a slightly different perspective on what Apple could do with its $100 billion (and over by now) cash horde. Obviously due to the publication's automotive bent, the emphasis is on uses of funds that tend to be related to the 'horsepower' space. In short, the consumer company, which is now far bigger than the entire US retail sector as noted before, could purchase 435,113 Ferrari 458 Italia's and/or some permutation of the other options indicated below. That said, while it is well-known what conventional wisdom says about any gentlemen who feels the need to redirect attention to his red blazing sport car from other, ahem, issues, we wonder what would be said about an entity that feels the urge to procure not one, but 435,113 Ferraris (or 41,667 Bugatti Veyrons for that matter)...

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UPDATE: As call begins AAPL is trading $592

After hitting $605 in pre-market, and halting at $599.32, we see AAPL reopened at $580 -down from Friday's close. Volume is relatively low, so we can assume AAPL is not buying its stock just yet. More importantly, could this be the start of rotation from hedge funds to dividend funds? Those who wish to join the Apple call can do so at (877) 616-0063, passcode: 592016. As a reminder, and as updated on the call, of APPL's $98 billion in cash, $64 billion is offshore - this means that $34 billion is available for immediate distribution and so to cover the $45 billion program, we assume some healthy repatriation will occur? In this context, Apple admits it has has spoken to Congress and the administration about tax issues relating to cash repatriation. One can imagine the plot layout.

And so Steve Jobs legacy is now gone as Apple goes Jamie Dimon. At least Apple was not part of the stress test. And as announced yesterday, we for one, can't wait to find out if it was JPM that advised Apple, to pull a JPM. Finally, we hope that AAPL's cash creation rate remains the same, as $45 billion in 3 years may put quite a large dent on the company's onshore cash, which according to reports is one-third of total.

With a economic calendar devoid of virtually any events, the only two events worth of note this morning are the Greek CDS auction (where RBS appears to once again be confusing price and discount), and the Apple cash announcement due in just over an hour. The result is Apple stock which in the premarket session has traded as high as a new record high og $606, even as concerns emerge that the growth phase is over as the company transitions into a MSFT-type, post-Steve Jobs existence. Details of the 9 am call can be found here. Aside from that risk is broadly flat as hungover American traders take their seats.

• There is no Spanish siesta for the eurozone (FT)
• Greece over halfway to recovery, says PM (FT) - inspired comedy...
• Sarkozy Trims Gap With Rival, Polls Show (WSJ) - Diebold speaks again
• IMF’s Zhu Sees ‘Soft-Landing’ Even as Property Slides: Economy (Bloomberg)
• Obama Uses Lincoln to Needle Republicans Battling in Illinois (Bloomberg)
• Three shot dead outside Jewish school in France (Reuters)
• Osborne Seeks to End 50% Tax Spat With Pledge to Aid U.K. Poor (Bloomberg)
• Monti to Meet Labor Unions Amid Warning of Continued Euro Crisis (Bloomberg)

Minutes ago Apple announced that first thing tomorrow it will "host a conference call to announce the outcome of the Company’s discussions concerning its cash balance. Apple® will not be providing an update on the current quarter nor will any topics be discussed other than cash." As a reminder, Apple has just about 100 billion in cash. Everyone expects a dividend. So what happens when everyone finally gets what they have been expecting for so long? Will it mean the end of the growth phase and the advent of the "MSFT" anti-growth curve? Also, which bank will claim the commission for advising Apple on how to spend a cash amount that while nearly a third of Greek GDP, is less than half of the US February budget deficit (in other words, Apple could fund just 12 days of the US spending burn rate in February)? Finally, was the pre-election administration at all involved in the making of this decision - remember the company was expected to announce a cash-related decision a month ago, and nothing happened. Why now? All shall be revealed tomorrow at 9 am.

Yesterday I got my new iPad. Yeah, I bought one like millions of other suckers. Apple can take my dollars and recycle them buying treasury bills and so partially fund, at least for a short while, America’s unsustainable debt position. But really, I bought one to enjoy the twilight of the miraculous system of global trade. An iPad is the cumulative culmination of millions of hours of work, as well as resources and manufacturing processes across the globe. It incorporates tellurium, indium, cobalt, gallium, and manganese mined in Africa. Neodymium mined in China. Plastics forged out of Saudi Crude. Aluminium mined in Brazil. Memory manufactured in Korea, semiconductors forged in Germany, glass made in the United States. And gallons and gallons of oil to ship all the resources and components around the world, ’til they are finally assembled in China, and shipped once again around the world to the consumer. And of course, that manufacturing process stands upon the shoulders of centuries of scientific research, and years of product development, testing, and marketing. It is a huge mesh of processes.

Listen up you Muppets!!!!! I'm rehearsing from my Goldman Interview, applying for retail stock broker, pushing Apple inventory :-)

All you need to read.

• Tapping oil from the SPR may be trickier than ever (Reuters)
• Why Quantitative Easing Is The Only Game in Town: Martin Wolf (FT)
• Lacker Says Fed May Need to Raise Target Interest Rate in 2013 (Bloomberg)
• Japan Debt-Financing Concern Clouds BOJ’s Bond Buying (Bloomberg) No worries - US will just buy Japan's bonds
• IMF Approves €28bn Loan to Greece (FT)
• Banks Want Fed to Iron Out 'Maiden' (WSJ)
• China 'Wealth Exodus' Underestimated (China Daily)
• Geithner Calls For Reforms to Boost Growth (FT)
• China Adds Treasuries For First Time Since July on Europe Woes (Bloomberg)
• Osborne Weighs 50p Tax Rate Cut To 45p (FT)

From Deutsche Bank: "We removed Apple from SOLAR following a ~50% gain since adding it to Solar on October 19th (adding ~$175Bln in market value). Over the same time period, the S&P is +15%."

Decoupling, or is the market about to fall hard?

All you need to read.

UPDATE: As Apple Crosses $600, Dan Loeb Rejoices

Two weeks ago we first reported that Dan Loeb was the latest entrant into the Apple hedge fund hotel, which at last estimation has now risen to nearly 250 hedge fund holders in the name, having made the company a top 5 position in his hedge fund Third Point at some point during the month of February. According to his latest monthly update, Apple is now the second best performer for Third Point, having been held at most 45 days. And considering that the vortex of Hotel Applefornia is now actively snaring every single "asset manager" starving to outperform the market, it is very likely that today's latest gap up in the name, is about to take out $600 as the company proceeds to add many more billions in market cap as somehow the launch of a pipeline of products that was known a year ago, is priced in over and over and over each and every day.