HUMPTY BLANKFEIN

The egg only got larger and larger, and more and more human: when she had come within a few yards of it, she saw that it had eyes and a nose and mouth; and when she had come close to it, she saw clearly that it was HUMPTY BLANKFEIN himself.

`It can't be anybody else!' she said to herself. `I'm as certain of it, as if Too Big To Fail were written all over his face.'

It might have been written a hundred times, easily, on that enormous face. Humpty Blankfein was sitting with his legs crossed, like a cracked out Turkish Derivatives Trader, on the top of a high wall — such a narrow one that Alice quite wondered how he could keep his balance — and, as his eyes were steadily fixed in the direction of a freshly printed pile of greenbacks, and he didn't take the least notice of her, she thought he must be a stuffed figure after all.

`And how eggactly like a rotten  Too Big  To Fail egg he is!' she said aloud, standing with her hands ready to catch him, for she was every moment expecting him to Fail.

`It's VERY provoking,' Humpty Blankfein said after a long silence, looking away from Alice as he spoke, `to be called Too Big To Fail — VERY!'

`I said you LOOKED like a rotten Too Big  To Fail egg, Sir,' Alice gently explained.

`And some Wall Street eggs are very rotten, you know, she added, hoping to turn her remark into a sort of a compliment.

`Some people,' said Humpty Blankfein, looking away from her as usual, `have no more common sense than a bearded PhD flying on Keynesian Thunderbird!'

Alice didn't know what to say to this: it wasn't at all like conversation, she thought, as he never said anything to HER; in fact, his last remark was evidently addressed to an ex-United States Senator standing on the back of the wall — so she stood and softly repeated to herself:

'Humpty Blankfein sat on a wall.

Humpty Blankfein was just Too Big To Fail.

All the Fed's Bankers including it's Chairman

Were sure to let Humpty do it again.'

[Adapted by WilliamBanzai7 from Through the Looking Glass, Lewis Carroll)

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