BANZAI7 NEWS--Today the MSM led by the WSJ, S&M and T&A reported that Swiss banking giant UBS has issued a strict dresscode for employees.

In a document of over 40 pages, UBS underlined details from head to toe, including permissible hairstyles, what cut of skirt and which type of socks to wear.

“The reputation of UBS makes up our most precious asset. Adopting an irreproachable behaviour implies having an impeccable presentation,” said the bank, which has been trying to rebuild its reputation since suffering record losses during the financial crisis.

Banzai7 has obtained the following excerpts from the UBS dress code.

Official USB Tie

Douche in a Suit

Modern Bailout Attire (MBA)

Banzai7 Limited Edition Derivative Tie

Merry Christmas Hawaiian Style