"This One Is A Bag Of Dicks": America Answers Oregon Militia's Plea For "Supplies"

Shortly after Ammon Bundy and a handful of armed militiamen “seized” a remote bird sanctuary to protest the imprisonment of a rancher and his son for setting fire to federal land, the group appealed to “patriotic” Americans to send supplies.

Initially, Bundy said his followers were prepared to occupy the building “for years” if they had to if it meant securing the release of Dwight Hammond and his son Steven and forcing the federal government to reimagine laws around land rights. As a reminder, the group is apparently attempting to force the issue of land control back into the national consciousness with a kind of ad hoc, haphazard rekindling of the Sagebrush Rebellion.

Shortly after Bundy suggested that the standoff could last “years”, it became apparent that the group might not have packed enough supplies.

Before you knew it, Jon Ritzheimer - the same Jon Ritzheimer who, in a YouTube video addressed to his family, cries while clutching a small paperback copy of the Constitution on the way to explaining why it’s necessary to commandeer a tiny building in the middle of nowhere - took to Facebook to ask for "cold weather socks, snacks, energy drinks, equipment for cold weather, snow camo, gear, and anything you think will help."

Well as it turns out, some “sympathizers” did indeed have ideas about “what would help.”

“The occupiers, who took over buildings at the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge on Jan. 2 in the latest conflict over the U.S. government's control of land in the West, had been hoping for snacks, fuel and warm clothes when they provided sympathizers with a local mailing address,” Reuters notes. “Instead, as they angrily showed online, they received sex-related toys and food that would be of little use as they braced for a long standoff with federal law enforcement agents who have kept watch from a distance.”

Yes, “food that would be of little use as they braced for a long standoff with federal agents.” Food like “a bag of penis-shaped candies,” or as Jon Ritzheimer puts it in an angry new video, “this one was really funny, a bag o' dicks.”

Watch below as Jon loses his cool with an American public he's trying so desperately to "help".