Archive

January 16th

Tyler Durden's picture

From: Treasury; To: Taxpayer...





We are happy to inform you that Chrysler Financial (aka Stephen Schwarzman of Apt. 15/16B at 740 Park) is now the proud recipient of your money.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

From: Treasury; To: Taxpayer...





We are happy to inform you that Chrysler Financial (aka Stephen Schwarzman of Apt. 15/16B at 740 Park) is now the proud recipient of your money.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Layoff Watch: Pfizer, AMD and GE Capital joining Hertz in "Streamlining"





Pfizer cutting 2,400 jobs or a third of its total workforce, AMD is slashing another 1,100 people, and GE Capital

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Layoff Watch: Pfizer, AMD and GE Capital joining Hertz in "Streamlining"





Pfizer cutting 2,400 jobs or a third of its total workforce, AMD is slashing another 1,100 people, and GE Capita

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Market Not Sure Why It Is Crashing But Doing So Anyway





In a totally non-schocking response to yesterday's trading action, the S&P has dropped 25 pts from its peak today.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

At The Altar: YHOO MSFT Part 2?





Bloomberg, citing the uber-dependant "person", reports that Microsoft's manic-depressive boss Ballmer has met with Yahoo's Chairman Roy Bostock in New York. Preamble to new marriage bells? We will keep you posted.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Layoff Watch: Hertz Laying off 4,000 Workers





Hertz is firing a lot of very bored, airport rental lot operators. The heavily leveraged auto rental company (CDS in the 1250's last time we cared), is hoping firing a third of its workforce (as compared to August 2006) will make it profitable.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Layoff Watch: Hertz Laying off 4,000 Workers





Hertz is firing a lot of very bored, airport rental lot operators. The heavily leveraged auto rental company (CDS in the 1250's last time we cared), is hoping firing a third of its workforce (as compared to August 2006) will make it profitable.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Death Watch: Circuit City Liquidates





Circuit City will not pass go on its way to the garbage heap. Despite rumors that it had found outright buyers for its stores, including such PE companies as Golden Gate Capital and Ricardo Salinas Pliego, Circuit City today filed a notice in bankruptcy court that it has hired liquidators and is unable to reach a pact with creditors.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Death Watch: Circuit City Liquidates





Circuit City will not pass go on its way to the garbage heap. Despite rumors that it had found outright buyers for its stores, including such PE companies as Golden Gate Capital and Ricardo Salinas Pliego, Circuit City today filed a notice in bankruptcy court that it has hired liquidators and is unable to reach a pact with creditors.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Bernierama Zionist Conspiracy? Jewish Billionaires Say No





Mortimer Zuckerman and Michael Steinhard are quoted as saying this whole Madoff ponzi shizzle "shouldn't be considered a Jewish scandal just because there were a large number of Jewish victims".

 

Tyler Durden's picture

More On The Secretive Frank and Charlie





Good to see we are on to something. In our breaking expose from Wednesday we presumed that there is more than meets the eye with Frank DiPascali and Charlie Wiener, the other, heretofore secretive Lipstick building 17th floorites.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

More On The Secretive Frank and Charlie





Good to see we are on to something. In our breaking expose from Wednesday we presumed that there is more than meets the eye with Frank DiPascali and Charlie Wiener, the other, heretofore secretive Lipstick building 17th floorites.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Kappa Beta Phi Exposed





A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How the Dow Jones used to make me smile.
And I learned my trade and had my chance
The music played I did my dance
And I made seven figures for a while.
I can't remember if I cried
when they pulled the plug on Countrywide...
It sucks that Iceland is out of ice....
Bye, Bye to my piece of the pie...
Now I travel coach whenever I fly...
Maybe this will be the day that I die.

 

Tyler Durden's picture

Kappa Beta Phi Exposed





A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How the Dow Jones used to make me smile.
And I learned my trade and had my chance
The music played I did my dance
And I made seven figures for a while.
I can't remember if I cried
when they pulled the plug on Countrywide...
It sucks that Iceland is out of ice....
Bye, Bye to my piece of the pie...
Now I travel coach whenever I fly...
Maybe this will be the day that I die.

 
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