$38 Billion In Cuts? Make That $353 Million

Tyler Durden's picture

Warning: people on blood pressure medication are urged not to read this.

Yesterday the media had a field day when it was uncovered that the hard fought $38 billion in budget "cuts" which almost caused America to shut down were in reality $14 billion. We, thus, can't wait to find out what the response will be when it is uncovered that the actual cuts were... $353 million. Yes: the ongoing functioning of the government was a pawn in a soap opera whose benefit to the US debt is $353 million, or about what Goldman's trading desk makes in less than one day.

From Washington Post:

A new budget estimate released Wednesday says that the spending bill negotiated between President Barack Obama and House Speaker John Boehner would produce less than 1 percent of the $38 billion in claimed savings by the end of this budget year.

The Congressional Budget Office estimate shows that the spending bill due for a House vote Thursday would pare just $352 million from the deficit through Sept. 30. About $8 billion in cuts to domestic programs and foreign aid are offset by nearly equal increases in defense spending.

The House began debate on the measure Wednesday with a test vote slated for the early afternoon. The measure appears on track to pass the House and Senate this week before a stopgap spending measure expires Friday at midnight despite opposition from some of the GOP’s most ardent budget cutters.

The budget deficit is projected at $1.6 trillion this year.

The CBO study confirms that the measure trims $38 billion in new spending authority, but says many of the cuts come in slow-spending accounts like water-and-sewer grants that don’t have an immediate deficit impact.

...

Republicans say they wish the measure would cut more but that the cuts negotiated by Boehner are about as good as can be expected giver that Democrats hold the Senate and the White House. In his February budget, Obama pressed a freeze on domestic agency accounts.

“We continue to push this president to places he never said he would go,” said House GOP Whip Kevin McCarthy of California. “The president said he would freeze spending. Our Speaker negotiated, outnumbered 3-1. We have cut spending.”

Speechless yet? You should be. And for those confused how B.H.O. picked the arbitrary number of $4 trillion in "cuts", John Lohman summarizes it best.

How Washington Cuts $38 Billion in 5 Simple Steps:

1.    Announce spending bill that claims $38 billion in cuts
2.    Wait for CBO to announce it only cuts $353 million1
3.    Realize you only do 0.0093% of what you say2
4.    Divide $38 billion by 0.0093% to get necessary target3
5.    Round to the nearest trillion and announce result

1 : Source: Washington Post, April 13, 2011
2 : $353 million divided by $38 billion
3 : $38 billion divided by 0.0093 = 4.1 trillion

 

 

 

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Sudden Debt's picture

I bet Obama is a good tapdancer.

 

TAKE IT AWAY OBUMBLE!! LET'S GIVE THE RETARDS A SHOW THEY'LL FORGET AFTER THE ELECTIONS!

 

 

Debtman And Robbin's picture

You think he'd also be a good "National Continuity Coordinator"?

Therefore, which one would qualify as "catastrophic emergency"? Fukushima? Government shutdown? Comex collapse? Zerohedge turning out to be a CIA psy-ops? Muir changing his avatar?

"Catastrophic Emergency" means any incident, regardless of location, that results in extraordinary levels of mass casualties, damage, or disruption severely affecting the U.S. population, infrastructure, environment, economy, or government functions;

Is a telepromter eligible to be the "single National Continuity Coordinator"? Would a telepromter with a two inch mustache be eligible?

NSPD-51 and HSPD-20. I wonder if there is a German copyright on that shit, dating back to...let's say...1933.

Too many questions...sorry. Gotta get another beer.

NOTW777's picture

this is the same CBO that said obamacare would cut the deficit

smlbizman's picture

the cbo is the scape goat....everyone of these assholes always credit their decisions to someone else, ...never ever have anyone stood up and said my idea is...its the cbo, boweles simpson, god, the people for fucking other people.etc.,....all the cbo does is math based on provided info...so big o says 1+1= 4....hows it look?

willien1derland's picture

Bingo! We have a winner, unfortunately, if you are a US taxpayer well you know where you stand unfortunately - I want to know when it became publicly acceptable to blatantly lie without accountability or recourse....

Pool Shark's picture

 

I think it was somewhere between:

"I did not have sex with that woman, Monica Lewinski."

and:

"Simply stated, there is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass destruction."

 

Pool Shark's picture

 

Actually, the second was a quote by Dick Cheney (though members of both parties parroted the phrase).

Republicrats,

Demicans,

A plague on both their houses...

 

MSimon's picture

Saddam outsourced his nuke program to Libya. The Kahn network. You can look it up.

Id fight Gandhi's picture

I'll get over you, I know I will... Ill pretend my shit's not stinking ... As I'm the king of wishful thinking.

ivars's picture

Just not to forget important things:

Spent fuel pool at Fukushima reactor 4 has become open air reactor as spent fuel rods are admitted to be damaged and undergoing nuclear fission since March 13th:

http://saposjoint.net/Forum/viewtopic.php?f=66&t=2657&p=31780#p31780

An open air fission reactor. Not very powerfull so far.

 

magpie's picture

yummy Plutonium Oxide...

Id fight Gandhi's picture

At this rate Japan is going Godzilla will BE a reality after all that radiation.

trav7777's picture

this is as I deduced just from the spotty information that we received out of Japan.  The SFPs always were the problem.  Mechanical dislocation of rods along with water has placed them into sporadic criticality, explaining inaccessability, neutron beams, all of that.

The *pools* are why nobody can access the reactor buildings and why we continue to have radiation release.

A SFP anywhere should be looked at as an uncontained potential reactor core (or several).  Some physical damage plus unborated water and you're going to get fission.  Don't pour in water and you get an uncontained meltdown, zircaloy fire, etc.  Lord knows what is underneath these SFPs all over the world...maybe aristichan can weigh in.  It very clearly does not look like they have the same physical safety apparatus as an actual reactor.

This is a sick irony that they put all this effort into designing relatively safe actual reactors, with multiple redundant safety systems, yet they take the very same shit, put 97% equivalent rods in a big matrix in a fucking swimming pool and pretend like we can then just put it on ignore.

A SFP meltdown is a massive catastrophe waiting to happen.  It is not nuclear power that is dangerous, nor reactors, but everything outside of them.  The only part of the fuel cycle that appears to use containment and safety is the actual fission part, when in any kind of LWR, the rods are JUST as dangerous after they come out of the reactor as during the fission process.

topcallingtroll's picture

It is just a matter of time before a crazy man crashes his private plane into a cooling pool.

kengland's picture

Trav,

Do you have any good book suggestions for the current and historical state of affairs when it comes to culture?

Your a good man. Keep up the fight brother.

tiger7905's picture

Latest from Arnie at Fairewind Associates about Fukushima, getting more concerned about information flow, or rather lack their of.
Also a link to a recent session Arnie did on the myths of 3 Mile Island.

http://goldandsilverlinings.com/?p=616

DeweyLeon's picture

There really isn't anything the elites can do to the people at this point, short of starvation, that the people will not take.

Chris Jusset's picture

As long as the sheeple have their Dominoes Pizza, Bud Light, Doritos chips, and remote control (for tuning in to "Dancing With the Stars" and Major League Baseball), then there will be pervasive contentedness ...

Dr. Richard Head's picture

No kidding. 401K's/IRAs were effectively raided, home equity stolen, stagnant wages, lost jobs, rising cost of living, consumer/student debt, taxes rising, social security recipients being screwed, and now they are going after the public sector retirements as the last bastion of any wealth left to take.  Fucking Americants!

They are already and literally starving people in America, kicking them out of their homes, taking any savings they have through dollar debasement and you have these fucks that believe "if we just voted for ______ (fill in the blank with your "party affiliation"), things would work themselves out.  Now that the ______ is in control they will really take care of these problems."  Jumbled thinking fuckers.

I still have people tell me, "Dr. Head, don't fight the system like a serf.  You need to just work harder, become richer, and you too can be part of the top 1%."  Fuck that.  It's their party and we ain't invited.  

EscapeKey's picture

You make it sound as if the wealth was swapped for some magic beans. No, we got American Idol, Lost, some Superbowl finals, and.... hang on, all of a sudden it sounds as if the magic beans would have been the better swap.

Dr. Richard Head's picture

That wealth was swapped for indentured servitude of debt to the banksters and paying tribute to the federal government in a whole array of fees, charges, and garden variety fists up our ass.  It was traded for police interrogations, loss of privacy, and letting the TSA fondle our children. 

But look at the bright side.  We do get to o cast ballots so that each side of the aisle can take turns raping us financially.  America. Land of the free baby.  Freedom to be a fucking slave.  Don't forget to vote.. meh.

Dr. Richard Head's picture

Sarcasm detector must of been off.  My bad.  Fuck voting indeed. I do vote, but just to say no on all taxes, levies, and such. The puppet in the seats don't matter though.

equity_momo's picture

No i heard you loud and clear Dr. I just felt like emphasizing your post into a few short words.

Dr. Richard Head's picture

Nope, just a doctor of being a dick head or so I am told. 

Robot Traders Mom's picture

Bingo. Unless our lives are truly in danger and our survival is on the line, there is nothing the masses will do...

+1

ghostfaceinvestah's picture

and if the sheeple don't take it, they will just increase the fluoride levels in the water

hambone's picture

Hmmmm.  That is why hyperinflation is a lock.  We can not and will not stop spending.

Not much more can be said...

Hearst's picture

These cocksuckers believe they can keep the funny money flowing with out consequences.  The 'deflation' card will be pulled again and again as some asset (housing) prices fall and funding dries up.  In the end, the ink will keep pouring and inflation in 'commodities' will be blamed on just about everyone and anything else except the FED. 

Dr. Richard Head's picture

Damn straight.  It's those Muslims that are causing oil to spike.  I mean, it's speculators.  I mean, unrest in the middle east.  I mean we need to drill more.  It's those damned liberals....etc, etc. Left, right, left and the lemmings follow and spout these excuses as gospel.  Fuck them.

Nevermind inflation is already baked into the cake.  QE the First is just now showing up in oil prices and food.  Wait until QE lite and QE2 make its way into the money supply as it relates to oil and food. 

I only kill chickens and wheat's picture

If only our Muslim brethen could give us a hand, with a suitcase to

DC while congress and Barry are home. Yea, I know collateral damage

is a bitch.

hambone's picture

Collateral damage of what these guys in DC are doing to our nation and worldwide is far worse than the collateral damage you are suggesting.

mtomato2's picture

Dr. Head, forgive me for not previously being a fan, but I like what you're saying/repeating here.  I'm about to come completely un-fucking-glued.

I heard a couple of people I used to actually admire interviewing with Andrew Napolitano (whom I still do) the other day.  They were arguing that the "Republicans" (note the quotes) needed to go ahead with raising the debt limit because then ... (here's the best part) "WHEN WE WIN..." in 2012, "WE" can REALLY make some SERIOUS cuts to the budget THEN!!!  Holymotherofgod.

I even heard Rand Paul say that the "ONLY" way he would vote to increase the debt ceiling was if "some serious cuts, or a balanced budget amendment were included with it..."

Is anybody even LISTENING to these asspounders anymore?  Why, O WHY is ANYBODY in public office right now?

 

Holy Shit.  There went my New Years Resolution to try and be more civil on Zero Hedge.

I'M MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANY MORE!!!!!

Blotsky's picture

I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad. It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's worth, banks are going bust, shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TV's while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be. We know things are bad - worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller, and all we say is, 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms. Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. Just leave us alone.' Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get mad! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot - I don't want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. All I know is that first you've got to get mad. You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, God damn it! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, 'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!' I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell - 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!... You've got to say, 'I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it: "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"

cgbspender's picture

That's an absolutely fantastic quote, from an absolutely fantastic movie.

Too bad cinema junkies are the only ones who have ever even heard of it (in my dealings, atleast).

DonnieD's picture

Is this not fraud?

Developers's picture

More like gross negligence.

NidStyles's picture

I think everyone should simply quit paying taxes until they get their crap together.

cxl9's picture

You go first. I'll stand way ..... over here and watch.

 

plocequ1's picture

Much better. Now back to our rally in progress. Im glad to have Obama as my commander in chief.

silvertrain's picture

WWE wrestling shit here people....

FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

The rulers are the criminal scum of the earth and the people they rule are stupid, apathetic and docile beyond all imagination.

It's a win/win situation.

You're only alive 70 years anyway if you're lucky, so who gives a s**t, you may as well spent that 70 years being a slave for peanuts, what else is there to do anyway?