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Afternoon Humor: Dick Bove's Hist(o/e)rical Bank of America Price Targets

Tyler Durden's picture


Traditionally we reserve the funny pages for Friday but for Dick Bove we will always make an exception. While his Buy call on Lehman days ahead of the firm's bankruptcy can never be toppled in the pantheon of financial humor, his recent Price Target track record vis-a-vis Bank of America stock is rapidly approaching Hall of Fame status. The chart below says it all. And for those confused, the "B" stands for Buy.

Courtesy of John Lohman


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Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:13 | 1467991 plocequ1
plocequ1's picture

Better wording: And now for the entertainment portion of our show

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:19 | 1468013 Doode
Doode's picture

Well, if you were buying it all this time then imagine the big bux you will have once it upticks to even a half way from the top! Hehehe

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:32 | 1468060 malikai
malikai's picture

Seriously, this guy is just noise. He should be like my broker and only call buys on the peaks. At least you can trade that kind of BS.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:47 | 1468109 I think I need ...
I think I need to buy a gun's picture

if things fell right for everyone, should this man really have a job or is he representing a bad element in our system

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:32 | 1468061 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Can someone help me with this graph?  Does it mean:

a)  Dick Bove is wholly incompetent.

b)  Dick Bove is one big fat pollyanna.

c)  Dick Bove has no idea what he is doing.

d)  Dick Bove just opens his mouth to feel important, and knows 0% of his area of expertise.


I'm thinking d), but could be wrong.


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:35 | 1468069 SmoothCoolSmoke
SmoothCoolSmoke's picture

It means Dick Bove; bought and paid for WS Banksters.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:53 | 1468127 Doode
Doode's picture

Analysts are worthless in general, but I wonder what is the overall record for DBove. Maybe there are some redeeming qualities - I just do not know. I do know that many will tell you that a. investment is long term, and b. if you bought it when they told you then in X years you will be sitting on a pile of cash where X is carefully selected to be a top price for their recommendations :)

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:13 | 1468330 HowardBeale
HowardBeale's picture

e) It means Dick Bove is a criminal whore that will do or say anything for money?


Nobody could be that stupid and still have a job. Thus...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 20:27 | 1468539 Doña K
Doña K's picture

I still remember his face when he called Lehman a buy. I immediately doubled my puts. Not a good poker player you are Mr. Bove. Thank you for half of my shiny Porsche. The other half was by a good tip from Mr. Jim Rogers on Citi.

I already have 30k miles on it and ready to trade in for a new one.  I know that Jim reads Zero hedge. Jim, we need a good tip. We know you are shorting a big bank. Can you give us the first and the last letter?

I am aready short the one I think you mean and up considerably, but.. I need to be sure.

Mr. Bove, we also need your help. Give us your wisdom. s/

Cheers to all   

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 23:18 | 1469015 jerry_theking_lawler
jerry_theking_lawler's picture

yes, one of my all time favs, mr. rogers...(a fellow southerner and i just went through his AL hometown a few weeks ago)...please give us a 'good tip'....i too am needing 1/2 of a new porsche. actually, i would settle for 1 whole kia.....

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:41 | 1468242 max2205
max2205's picture

Talk about averaging down....

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 21:47 | 1468776 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

It's a photo finish race in reverse between Dick Bove and Doug Kass!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:16 | 1468001 Misean
Misean's picture

I could be as astoundingly wrong as Dick Butthead for the salary he's pulling! Anyone got god's servant Lord B's phone number?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:21 | 1468020 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

B is for Butthead


B-ay-bay, b-ee-bee, bi-i-bicki-bi-bee-o-Bove,

bicky-bi-Bove, b-u-boo!, bicky-bi-Butthead!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:32 | 1468226 Piranhanoia
Piranhanoia's picture

(beavis' a dope)

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:16 | 1468004 augie
augie's picture

eerily similar to an image of a city burning. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:19 | 1468014 Slap That Taco
Slap That Taco's picture

Space invaders? Was that the name of that game?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:16 | 1468005 Dkizzle49855
Dkizzle49855's picture

what a maroon!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:41 | 1468089 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Cretin. Imbecile

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:17 | 1468006 Cleanclog
Cleanclog's picture

Bove must not have nerve receptors in his skull - he loves to bang his head against the wall.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:45 | 1468101 Max Hunter
Max Hunter's picture

He's also not very good at math.. Here it is.

BAC + Countrywide = BAC stock < $ 2.00

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:18 | 1468007 Slap That Taco
Slap That Taco's picture

You know, back in 2000 I was ignorant of the markets and basically had my money managed by a Mr.S.

I learned a huge lesson by that experience, and fired the SOB (nice guy actually, just incompetent with MY money.) It was a nasty break-up, I roasted him and left the office feeling like the loss of $xxx,xxx.00 was worth it for getting to tell to his face what a fuck up he was.

This guy Bove must make millions a year.  Nothing wrong with that of course, but who the hell are his clients? Millionaires without a brain in their heads? How does a guy who is consistently wrong continue to be in business?  A certified expert no less, on a sector that he is wrong seemingly MOST OF THE TIME.

Help me out, I'm getting good at this (no, not pole dancing) and want some rubes, er, clients of my own.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:22 | 1468028 vote_libertaria...
vote_libertarian_party's picture

I'd bet he has 0 clients.  He is probably paid by WS firms to misinform the masses.


He says 'buy' when WS needs to sell and lock in profits.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:20 | 1468009 oldmanagain
oldmanagain's picture

Bove is a great indicator.  When he really gets bullish, all hell breaks loose, market collapse.

It could be a Goldman ploy, drawing in enough buyers in to unload on.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:18 | 1468010 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

All US big banks always have these big target prices. They are never lower then the actual price.

When BAC was at 17$, everybody was yelling 40$ as a short term target.

For Citi is was 16$ when it was at 5$....

All I know is that both banks give a dividend that values these stocks at 40 CENTS for Bac and 4$ For CITI!


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:21 | 1468022 Slap That Taco
Slap That Taco's picture


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:18 | 1468012 oogs66
oogs66's picture

it looks like something from etch a sketch ....probably a good tool for him to use for his analysis anyways

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:19 | 1468017 ZackAttack
ZackAttack's picture

Dick Bove... before he dicks you.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:42 | 1468092 Global Hunter
Global Hunter's picture

good stuff!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:20 | 1468018 SwingForce
SwingForce's picture

Don't leave out Cramer! Remember "10 Reasons to BUY-BUY-BUY Bank of America" on Jan 6, 2011 when that day the stock was $14.69 high/ $14.34 low.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:26 | 1468037 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

I'll bet Cramer recommends GS within 7 days. 

I think that is the real puppetmaster whose had is up his ass.  For a while I thought it might be JPM, but I think it is Goldman. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:46 | 1468097 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

Wow, no sooner than I posted this then did the Fast Money bottom bitchez come out promoting GS as "the best in breed."  I suppose cramer will not be far behind....maybe in the next 2 days vs the 7 days as I stated above? 

It's almost eerie sometimes, how predictable these monsters are. 

Every one of them should be tried on RICO charges.

You know, one day, for just ONE day, all of us here at ZH ought to open up a thread whereby we all watch Fast Money and Mad Money together and just rip them all new assholes.  I think that would be SO MUCH FUN.  We should do it on a big news day, such as when the debt ceiling is raised. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:10 | 1468168 SwingForce
SwingForce's picture

Cramer worked for Goldman "In the DAY", whatever that means.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:37 | 1468236 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

you said "worked" as in past tense????

Did you mean "will have worked" ???  (I think that is the past perfect participle, right?) 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:06 | 1468155 sheeple2012
sheeple2012's picture

and when poor Auntie Emm calls the Lightin' Round from her trailer in Kansas tonight to ask what she should do now after buying it at $14.50, he will say "SELL SELL SELL".... which of course means BUY BUY BUY 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:20 | 1468019 spongeBOB
spongeBOB's picture

He should've quit while ahead.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:21 | 1468025 Mongo
Mongo's picture

Is he for real? nevermind...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:22 | 1468027 centerline
centerline's picture

Wow, caught the falling knife over and over.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:25 | 1468033 oldmanagain
oldmanagain's picture

I have often wondered how much it costs to get a Cramer recommendation.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:32 | 1468065 wrs
wrs's picture

BAC is a buy at $8 and will find support at $7.50.  Then it's going to turn around for a nice run to $11 by option expiry.  That way the calls get bought up cheap and the puts expire worthless.  It's the game they play with big option expirations.  The one coming up on BAC is pretty large.  I expect BAC to bottom in the next week or so and then start moving back up again. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:39 | 1468087 wrs
wrs's picture

BAC is a buy at $8 and will find support at $7.50.  Then it's going to turn around for a nice run to $11 by option expiry.  That way the calls get bought up cheap and the puts expire worthless.  It's the game they play with big option expirations.  The one coming up on BAC is pretty large.  I expect BAC to bottom in the next week or so and then start moving back up again. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:29 | 1468043 Milton Waddams
Milton Waddams's picture


In 1885, William R. Travers, prominent New York businessman and builder of Saratoga Race Track, was taken out for lunch by a Wall Street broker anxious to impress him and win his business. The broker took Travers to a nearby marina to show off his yacht and those of the other brokers who worked for his firm. The businessman looked down the line of beautiful craft and asked, "Where are the clients' yachts?".

The broker didn't have an answer. Travers took his investment business elsewhere.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:30 | 1468047 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

generational b b b buy b b b bove b b b bitchez!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:30 | 1468048 monopoly
monopoly's picture

Cramer runs a close second to Bove. And they have Cramer on at 6AM west coast time. Absolutely nauseating. That was the only time slot I even turned on the idiot channel. Now it is just Bloomberg until market opens and then XM music till the trading day is over.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:56 | 1468122 Navigator
Navigator's picture

I've also switched to Bloomy since CNBC put that immature Cramer clown on at 6am PDT. There's not a chance in the world I'm going to watch Cramer jump around and scream and shout down all the traders and other guests on that show.  I suspect their ratings are plunging since very few adults will put up with that sort of nonsense.  I did tune in this morning to listen to El-Erian and noticed the network is virtually BEGGING viewers to write in to them via email.  I suspect no one is writing because no one is watching.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:30 | 1468215 FinalCollapse
FinalCollapse's picture

Play Cramer to your kids, and tell them it's "Barney the Dinosaur". They will not notice the difference.

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 03:14 | 1469367 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

I understand your comment, but you shouldn't lie to your children like that, instead call him "Baldy the Blarneysaur!"

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:44 | 1468423 theinebriatedsot
theinebriatedsot's picture

don't forget Dickhead Kudlow....

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:31 | 1468057 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

Just doing Gods work.


teach them to fish and all that.


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:33 | 1468066 Franken_Stein
Franken_Stein's picture


Here in Germany, when you lose bigtime, you are being awarded the so-called "Zonk", which is a little furry red mouse !


That Zonk figure stems from a TV game show, where a candidate would always be presented envelopes or portals to choose from, behind some there'd be a big prize, behind others, well, the Zonk, or dead loss.


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:42 | 1468093 Franken_Stein
Franken_Stein's picture


Oh, I found out that's a remake of the American game show "Let's make a deal".

Interesting, didn't know that.


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:44 | 1468098 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Monty Hall rides again

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:34 | 1468068 Eireann go Brach
Eireann go Brach's picture

I think he could run Obamas lemonade stand when the great one is off golfing!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:26 | 1468206 trav7777
trav7777's picture

onetime would shut them down for lack of a permit

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:35 | 1468071 Clark80
Clark80's picture

And for those confused, the "B" stands for Buy.


No, no; aBort!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:36 | 1468074 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

Reminds me what fun could be had with a Bloomberg terminal and a quiet Friday afternoon.  I can show you ANR screens that make Bove's BAC stubborness look decent (well i cant anymore , i quit to become a monk)


To anyone that has never worked on Wall St and thinks analysts are useless bags of shit :  shit can be used as fertilizer ; these fuck-ups couldnt even be used to help your garden grow.


Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:39 | 1468085 WilliamShatner
WilliamShatner's picture

Lovin' my January $10 puts on BofA

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:43 | 1468094 Ned Zeppelin
Ned Zeppelin's picture

Well, this graph makes it pretty clear just who it is that Mr. Bove serves.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:52 | 1468123 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Those flames, remind you of....Satan?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:43 | 1468095 NOTaREALmerican
NOTaREALmerican's picture

Maybe he meant the "B" as Bove, not buy. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:46 | 1468106 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

MSM used Bove as their primary prophet of limitless optimism back in the dark days of late 08-09. 

Everytime it couldn't get more at odds with reality, it did. Until, of course, it won't

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:53 | 1468125 dogismyth
dogismyth's picture

What??  No article on the blowout earnings by IBM?  I guess its all doom and gloom here at ZH.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:23 | 1468172 d00daa
d00daa's picture

Oh please tell me you're a buyer @ 178.

IBM had "blowout" earnings through Q308 too...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 17:55 | 1468131 ShankyS
ShankyS's picture

Now that chart is funny. I say let him borrow a clock or two from flav-a-flav and call him Pumpmaster DB feat. BofA

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:03 | 1468148 leftcoastfool
leftcoastfool's picture

Dick Bove is a regular laugh riot...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:53 | 1468444 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

The "laugh riot" title belongs to Tyler...

"Hist(o/e)rical" is an instant entry into the hall of fame pantheon of... (WTF do you call those 'made up' words that gain instant recognotion?)...

I'll add a wimpy offering to the genre...

"Re-MEMBER dick bove" (if you had 2 think about it - it 'whizzed' over your head)...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:55 | 1468453 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

The "laugh riot" title belongs to Tyler...

"Hist(o/e)rical" is an instant entry into the hall of fame pantheon of... (WTF do you call those 'made up' words that gain instant recognotion?)...

I'll add a wimpy offering to the genre...

"Re-MEMBER dick bove" (if you had 2 think about it - it 'whizzed' over your head)...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:58 | 1468459 francis_sawyer
francis_sawyer's picture

Past that... The real question is... "what does the X stand for in his name & what does Jr. think of his calls"?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:08 | 1468160 Tuffmug
Tuffmug's picture

"B" is Wall Street's abbreviation for "BS".

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:20 | 1468188 Johnny Yuma
Johnny Yuma's picture

Now I know where to put my buy stop on my short BAC position!

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:33 | 1468227 FinalCollapse
FinalCollapse's picture

BAC is awarded the ranking of five dicks. 

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:37 | 1468237 Aductor
Aductor's picture

Hilarious. His buy recommendations have a correlation of nearly 1.0 to the stock price (i.e. always buy, no matter what).

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:50 | 1468263 mark mchugh
mark mchugh's picture

Let us take a moment to review Bove's Trade of a Lifetime!!!!!!

Citi - March of 2008 (you can't make this shit up)

His split-adjusted price target is $550


P.S. Najarian's a tool too.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 18:57 | 1468282 no life
no life's picture

Bove Dick, bitchez.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:07 | 1468317 steelhead23
steelhead23's picture

I'm certain Dick is waiting for the upcoming debt for equity swap before he cashes in his puts.  Do you seriously believe he is long BAC?  After all, if a Moody's rating is merely "opinion", surely Dick must be held faultless for leading lambs to the slaughter.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:23 | 1468360 Thorsten Veblen
Thorsten Veblen's picture

On the other hand, sooner or later it'll be the right call...

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 19:54 | 1468446 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

Did you mean, "Hysterical" BAC Target?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 20:40 | 1468579 glenlloyd
glenlloyd's picture

I could do just as good a job and I would only ask for half as much...I think...btw, how much does this jackass earn in a year?

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 21:11 | 1468686 janus
janus's picture

i get it, this is like that simpsons episode where bart, through a bit of bartesque chicanery, finds himself in the 'special' school: during a geometry lesson the teacher gives the answer as (radius X diameter)Radius squared...and then does this 'don't ya get it face'; further simplifying the matter for bart, who's still baffled by the laughter flowing in from all sides, she says RDRR...bart still blank...and then har-dee-har-har.

so i get it, RDRR.

no, i do get it; it just takes me a while.  I think i overthink these charts.  Stop thinking, let things happen, and be the chart.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 21:24 | 1468719 knowless
knowless's picture

i'm stealing hist(o/e)rical.

Mon, 07/18/2011 - 23:11 | 1469000 bluelou
bluelou's picture

Ease up.  No buy-sider uses a sell-side price target or rating for an investment decision.  Bove probably wouldn't even put a price target out there if his firm didn't require him to do so.  The only clients who care about a rating are the ones that are already long.  

Tue, 07/19/2011 - 07:39 | 1469483 dcb
dcb's picture

yes but if he sold at the right times it also looks like h could have made some good profits. (LOL)

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