Afternoon Humor: Dick Bove's Hist(o/e)rical Bank of America Price Targets

Tyler Durden's picture

Traditionally we reserve the funny pages for Friday but for Dick Bove we will always make an exception. While his Buy call on Lehman days ahead of the firm's bankruptcy can never be toppled in the pantheon of financial humor, his recent Price Target track record vis-a-vis Bank of America stock is rapidly approaching Hall of Fame status. The chart below says it all. And for those confused, the "B" stands for Buy.

Courtesy of John Lohman

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plocequ1's picture

Better wording: And now for the entertainment portion of our show

Doode's picture

Well, if you were buying it all this time then imagine the big bux you will have once it upticks to even a half way from the top! Hehehe

malikai's picture

Seriously, this guy is just noise. He should be like my broker and only call buys on the peaks. At least you can trade that kind of BS.

I think I need to buy a gun's picture

if things fell right for everyone, should this man really have a job or is he representing a bad element in our system

nope-1004's picture

Can someone help me with this graph?  Does it mean:

a)  Dick Bove is wholly incompetent.

b)  Dick Bove is one big fat pollyanna.

c)  Dick Bove has no idea what he is doing.

d)  Dick Bove just opens his mouth to feel important, and knows 0% of his area of expertise.

 

I'm thinking d), but could be wrong.

 

SmoothCoolSmoke's picture

It means Dick Bove; bought and paid for WS Banksters.

Doode's picture

Analysts are worthless in general, but I wonder what is the overall record for DBove. Maybe there are some redeeming qualities - I just do not know. I do know that many will tell you that a. investment is long term, and b. if you bought it when they told you then in X years you will be sitting on a pile of cash where X is carefully selected to be a top price for their recommendations :)

HowardBeale's picture

e) It means Dick Bove is a criminal whore that will do or say anything for money?

 

Nobody could be that stupid and still have a job. Thus...

Doña K's picture

I still remember his face when he called Lehman a buy. I immediately doubled my puts. Not a good poker player you are Mr. Bove. Thank you for half of my shiny Porsche. The other half was by a good tip from Mr. Jim Rogers on Citi.

I already have 30k miles on it and ready to trade in for a new one.  I know that Jim reads Zero hedge. Jim, we need a good tip. We know you are shorting a big bank. Can you give us the first and the last letter?

I am aready short the one I think you mean and up considerably, but.. I need to be sure.

Mr. Bove, we also need your help. Give us your wisdom. s/

Cheers to all   

jerry_theking_lawler's picture

yes, one of my all time favs, mr. rogers...(a fellow southerner and i just went through his AL hometown a few weeks ago)...please give us a 'good tip'....i too am needing 1/2 of a new porsche. actually, i would settle for 1 whole kia.....

max2205's picture

Talk about averaging down....

Pladizow's picture

It's a photo finish race in reverse between Dick Bove and Doug Kass!

Misean's picture

I could be as astoundingly wrong as Dick Butthead for the salary he's pulling! Anyone got god's servant Lord B's phone number?

I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

B is for Butthead

 

B-ay-bay, b-ee-bee, bi-i-bicki-bi-bee-o-Bove,

bicky-bi-Bove, b-u-boo!, bicky-bi-Butthead!

augie's picture

eerily similar to an image of a city burning. 

Cleanclog's picture

Bove must not have nerve receptors in his skull - he loves to bang his head against the wall.

Max Hunter's picture

He's also not very good at math.. Here it is.

BAC + Countrywide = BAC stock < $ 2.00

Slap That Taco's picture

You know, back in 2000 I was ignorant of the markets and basically had my money managed by a Mr.S.

I learned a huge lesson by that experience, and fired the SOB (nice guy actually, just incompetent with MY money.) It was a nasty break-up, I roasted him and left the office feeling like the loss of $xxx,xxx.00 was worth it for getting to tell to his face what a fuck up he was.

This guy Bove must make millions a year.  Nothing wrong with that of course, but who the hell are his clients? Millionaires without a brain in their heads? How does a guy who is consistently wrong continue to be in business?  A certified expert no less, on a sector that he is wrong seemingly MOST OF THE TIME.

Help me out, I'm getting good at this (no, not pole dancing) and want some rubes, er, clients of my own.

vote_libertarian_party's picture

I'd bet he has 0 clients.  He is probably paid by WS firms to misinform the masses.

 

He says 'buy' when WS needs to sell and lock in profits.

oldmanagain's picture

Bove is a great indicator.  When he really gets bullish, all hell breaks loose, market collapse.

It could be a Goldman ploy, drawing in enough buyers in to unload on.

Sudden Debt's picture

All US big banks always have these big target prices. They are never lower then the actual price.

When BAC was at 17$, everybody was yelling 40$ as a short term target.

For Citi is was 16$ when it was at 5$....

All I know is that both banks give a dividend that values these stocks at 40 CENTS for Bac and 4$ For CITI!

TAKE THOSE LOSES LIKE MAN PUNCKS!

oogs66's picture

it looks like something from etch a sketch ....probably a good tool for him to use for his analysis anyways

ZackAttack's picture

Dick Bove... before he dicks you.

SwingForce's picture

Don't leave out Cramer! Remember "10 Reasons to BUY-BUY-BUY Bank of America" on Jan 6, 2011 when that day the stock was $14.69 high/ $14.34 low.

http://www.cnbc.com/id/40949412/

I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

I'll bet Cramer recommends GS within 7 days. 

I think that is the real puppetmaster whose had is up his ass.  For a while I thought it might be JPM, but I think it is Goldman. 

I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

Wow, no sooner than I posted this then did the Fast Money bottom bitchez come out promoting GS as "the best in breed."  I suppose cramer will not be far behind....maybe in the next 2 days vs the 7 days as I stated above? 

It's almost eerie sometimes, how predictable these monsters are. 

Every one of them should be tried on RICO charges.

You know, one day, for just ONE day, all of us here at ZH ought to open up a thread whereby we all watch Fast Money and Mad Money together and just rip them all new assholes.  I think that would be SO MUCH FUN.  We should do it on a big news day, such as when the debt ceiling is raised. 

SwingForce's picture

Cramer worked for Goldman "In the DAY", whatever that means.

I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

you said "worked" as in past tense????

Did you mean "will have worked" ???  (I think that is the past perfect participle, right?) 

sheeple2012's picture

and when poor Auntie Emm calls the Lightin' Round from her trailer in Kansas tonight to ask what she should do now after buying it at $14.50, he will say "SELL SELL SELL".... which of course means BUY BUY BUY 

spongeBOB's picture

He should've quit while ahead.

Mongo's picture

Is he for real? nevermind...

centerline's picture

Wow, caught the falling knife over and over.

oldmanagain's picture

I have often wondered how much it costs to get a Cramer recommendation.

wrs's picture

BAC is a buy at $8 and will find support at $7.50.  Then it's going to turn around for a nice run to $11 by option expiry.  That way the calls get bought up cheap and the puts expire worthless.  It's the game they play with big option expirations.  The one coming up on BAC is pretty large.  I expect BAC to bottom in the next week or so and then start moving back up again. 

wrs's picture

BAC is a buy at $8 and will find support at $7.50.  Then it's going to turn around for a nice run to $11 by option expiry.  That way the calls get bought up cheap and the puts expire worthless.  It's the game they play with big option expirations.  The one coming up on BAC is pretty large.  I expect BAC to bottom in the next week or so and then start moving back up again. 

Milton Waddams's picture

 

In 1885, William R. Travers, prominent New York businessman and builder of Saratoga Race Track, was taken out for lunch by a Wall Street broker anxious to impress him and win his business. The broker took Travers to a nearby marina to show off his yacht and those of the other brokers who worked for his firm. The businessman looked down the line of beautiful craft and asked, "Where are the clients' yachts?".

The broker didn't have an answer. Travers took his investment business elsewhere.

buzzsaw99's picture

generational b b b buy b b b bove b b b bitchez!

monopoly's picture

Cramer runs a close second to Bove. And they have Cramer on at 6AM west coast time. Absolutely nauseating. That was the only time slot I even turned on the idiot channel. Now it is just Bloomberg until market opens and then XM music till the trading day is over.

Navigator's picture

I've also switched to Bloomy since CNBC put that immature Cramer clown on at 6am PDT. There's not a chance in the world I'm going to watch Cramer jump around and scream and shout down all the traders and other guests on that show.  I suspect their ratings are plunging since very few adults will put up with that sort of nonsense.  I did tune in this morning to listen to El-Erian and noticed the network is virtually BEGGING viewers to write in to them via email.  I suspect no one is writing because no one is watching.

FinalCollapse's picture

Play Cramer to your kids, and tell them it's "Barney the Dinosaur". They will not notice the difference.

StychoKiller's picture

I understand your comment, but you shouldn't lie to your children like that, instead call him "Baldy the Blarneysaur!"

theinebriatedsot's picture

don't forget Dickhead Kudlow....