Beige Book: All Is Good (As If You Didn't Know); Snow Wordcount: Six Instances

Tyler Durden's picture

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faustian bargain's picture

Ah, the old snow job.

faustian bargain's picture

I mean, you know, who could've guessed there would be snow! ...in February! ...

Anonymous's picture

Add to the 6 references to snow:

harsh weather (2)
harsh winter weather
severe weather (2)
extreme winter weather
due to weather
adverse weather conditions

!!!

mynhair's picture

U forgot the 'poor weather' one.

rubearish10's picture

I don't think I've ever heard weather being such an excuse. This could only mean things are even worst than imaginable. BTW, what will they say if UE number is positive on Friday?? Oh, if it weren't for the weather there would be even more jobs, that's right.

Fritz's picture

Who is left to even believe that any of this wordsmithing even remotely collides with reality?

rubearish10's picture

So, nobody ever thought banks would use excess reserves to lock in profits through trading vs lending? WOW!

lizzy36's picture

Leisman just told me all good.   And pisani told me what the "important thing is" (alas, can't remember it). 

Maybe ZH should have a poll on what the excuse for lousy may/june numbers will be? Excess tulips?

Bam_Man's picture

No, in June it will be "an unexpected heat wave".

SteveNYC's picture

I'd love to see the entire CNBC crew (except Santelli) held accountable for their pathetic cheerleading. They really indoctrinate them well at good ol' GE. Die, large corporation, die!

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Other than shouting "Fire" in a crowded theater, everything else uttered by the talking heads at CNBC comes under the "opinion" category. Since you can't slander or libel the economy, it's all clear at CNBC.

carbonmutant's picture

CNBC would not mention FIRE in a crowded theatre. They been told their job is not to panic the patrons but to provide color commentary on the performance.

Pladizow's picture

CNBC Commentatrors are simply overpaid actors who dare not stray from their assigned script - for fear of being replaced.

Where did this CNBC british guy come from, what about Dylan Ratigan or the other guy who recently took a year long hiatus.

Where's Charlie Gasparino?

 

Unscarred's picture

Excess tulips...  Brilliant Lizzy!

Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

I love reading the biege book.  "The List of Lies!"

Thanks ZH.

masterinchancery's picture

You can't make this stuff up--snow in midwinter as the culprit!

Fritz's picture

And Goldman/Morgan ramps the market in ...3...2...1

Farcical Aquatic Ceremony's picture

These are the kind of guys who would **** your wife from behind, and if you walked into the room and caught them, would turn to you mid-act and say, "You're welcome."

Hondo's picture

There is nothing scientific about the BB.  It just a group of business people sitting around the various Fed Regional banks dining room talking about their industry, company, etc.  There is no accuracy to it....more of a propoganda tool than real information.......

jc125d's picture

Well since it probably won't happen that March brings RECORD SNOWSTORMS here is next month's report in advance:

Yep, yep, yep. It's all G-double O-D, good, good, good.
Yep, yep, yep. It's all G-double O-D, good with me, with me, with me.

 

Anonymous's picture

nice Bone Thugs reference

Cow's picture

"A real estate agent in a relatively upscale area of the New York District said prices have continued to drift downward but that short sales were relatively rare and most transactions were still above the mortgage balance."

The Fed employs thousands of people and this anecdote is the best they can do for data?

 

Hondo's picture

Of course they don't tell you what the sample size was (one guy....his aunt) and they don't tell that anything they come up with in these regional meeting is absolutely worthless and meaningless on any basis you want to look at it.  The sampling is one guy at lunch the day they hold the BB meeting.

Bob's picture

The wonder of unlimited degrees of freedom from the pulpit. 

Anonymous's picture

Well, at least they aren't yet reduced to quoting Page-6.

Anonymous's picture

So... if for example there are 1,000,000 jobs yet it only takes 500,000 to do the same amount of work (given economic standings) effectively there are too many employed.

Jobs start getting cut:
Month 1 cuts 100,000 total employed 900,000
Month 2 cuts 100,000 total employed 800,000
Month 3 cuts 100,000 total employed 700,000
Month 4 cuts 100,000 total employed 600,000
Month 5 cuts 60,000 total employed 540,000
"hey... job cuts slowed"
Month 6 cuts 40,000 total employed 500,000
"hey... jobs cuts have slowed"

Have they slowed or did we just get to the number given the economic standing?

Media spin... unemployment is slowing for two consecutive months. CNBC - buy, buy, buy the market.

Watch out for the unemployment spin.

mtomato2's picture

I have best heard this described as "The rate of bleeding slows dramatically when the body becomes a corpse..."

AR15AU's picture

Cuba is truly blessed....  without the accursed economic shackles of snowfall, their economy is free to exand ad infinitum. 

besodemuerte's picture

Sorry JP Morgan I couldn't pay my mortgage, too much snow this month.

BlackBeard's picture

The snow ate my homework.

lsbumblebee's picture

"Warmer temperatures will occur over the lower Mississippi Valley and southern Plains. After a rather long spell of below average temperatures and even some snow, the Southeast will see ample sunshine and much milder temperatures from Friday through the coming weekend. The door is open for more storms to impact the West Coast through the upcoming weekend. A weakening storm will slide through the Great Basin and interior Northwest over the next 24 hours. Rain and mountain snow will fall from central Washington southeast through Idaho, extreme western Montana, extreme western Wyoming and Utah."

jmc8888's picture

Who knew our economy worked fine until a few snowstorms.  Do they ever happen in februrary?  I thought they only happened in Winter...and februrary is in...oh yeah...winter.

Winter happens every year. Twice actually if you think globally.

 

I guess they take the snow as an event that is not calculated in their wonderful statistical models that account for everything (err nothing).

 

 

Joe Sixpack's picture

Summary:

The abstracted economy is improving (i.e., in theory). The real one is in dire straits.

 

Compare:

In theory derivatives are useful tools for risk management. In reality they have collapsed the current financial system.

 

www.DerivativesCollapse.com

MinnesotaNice's picture

We have now made it full circle... from green shoots to snowstorms.  Based on this Beige Book it is clearly a miracle that we have any economic activity at all in Minnesota in the winter... since snow is our life.  Someone needs to review the Beige Book reflecting February 2004 and see how many times snow is mentioned... that would be an interesting comparison... and likely offer the most authentic information on how much of what we are currently being fed is spin... albeit a snowy spin.

MinnesotaNice's picture

Beige Book March 2004 (reflecting Jan/Feb) had only 2 mentions of the word snow... and one of those mentions was the 'bountiful snowfalls gave a boost to ski resorts' and 'snow limited grazing in the Richmond District'... mmmm... seems as if snow is being used a bit excessively in 2010... perhaps it is time to short 'snow'.

Bam_Man's picture

Everybody knows that nothing gets done in MN during the winter. Except for icefishing and snowmobiling that is.

Anonymous's picture

We want lower interest rates. Negative rates for all, now!!
In case there's rain tomorrow.

BlackBeard's picture

What do you get when you combine a economist with a weatherman?

bugs_'s picture

A Sunshine Liquidity Trap?

crosey's picture

Don't eat that yellow snow!

Anonymous's picture

Shovels

The sales of shovels was extraordinarily strong in the DC area, with the unexpected February snowstorm and the expected BS out of washington politicians mouths.

bugs_'s picture

Global Snowing!

Anonymous's picture

Greatest country in the world.

Anonymous's picture

zerohedge.com and dailyjobcuts.com is where I get my news - and it aint looking good.

curbyourrisk's picture

"But nearly all Districts reported limited pricing power, with many firms unable to increase selling prices due to competitive pressure. Retail prices were stable in most Districts, although San Francisco noted heavy discounting."

 

DEFLATION IS A BITCH!!!!