Bernanke Lies Half Life Reduced To Under One Day As Aflac Scrambling To Shore Up Liquidity On European Exposure

Tyler Durden's picture

Yesterday during his press conference, the Chairman uttered his latest lie: "We have asked the banks to essentially do stress tests and ask, looking at all their positions, all their hedges, what would the effect on their capital be if -- if Greece defaulted...The answer is that the effects are very small.” Enter Aflac to prove that the half life of Bernanke's lies is now under 24 hours. From Bloomberg: "Aflac Inc. (AFL), the largest seller of supplemental health insurance, may issue as much as 100 billion yen ($1.24 billion) in debt as it records losses tied to investments in banks from Greece, Ireland and Portugal. Second-quarter losses on the assets will probably be about
$610 million, the Columbus, Georgia-based insurer said today in
a statement." Additionally, Aflac CEO Amos has added invesments in public utilities and Japanese government debt to minimize the company's exposure in Europe. Yet what is truly hilarious is that as the EFSF's spokesman Christof Roche just announced in commenting on the sale of 2016 bonds from the CDO, "Asian investors bought 46.5% of the bonds issued yesterday." In other words, by transferring exposure to Japan, Aflac is merely gaining exposure to Europe through yet another insolvent government. But such is life in the unwind phase of the biggest global ponzi ever conceived, in which the smallest mark to market event on the global financial balance sheet in which everyone's assets are someone's else liabilities and vice versa, will launch the biggest house of cards collapse in history.

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Ancona's picture

It's gonna get real interesting when Greece shits the bed.

The insurance companies and Big Five banks are doomed.

nope-1004's picture

I disagree.  Yes they are totally insolvent institutions, but it is the general population that are doomed.  The writing is on the wall:  Bailout the banks and finacial system at all cost, no matter what "transitory" effects arise as a result.  You just know that many more dollars are going to be thrown at that black hole of doom before they come out and admit defeat.

They are ensuring the end of most fiat currencies.  Benocide is ring leader.


WonderDawg's picture

Benocide is ring leader.

You still don't get it. Bernanke makes no decisions, he just follows orders. Why do you think he's so damn nervous during the press conferences? He's just saying what he's been told to say, and he's a terrible actor. The banksters pull his strings and he dances to their tunes.

bonddude's picture

See what happens when you fire GG?

SteveNYC's picture

Actually, Ben is telling the truth for once. The bank losses in the US in the case of a Greek default will be non-existent, simply because the taxpayer will be on the hook in place of the banks. 

"Ben the Honest"

eatthebanksters's picture

"...and Big Five Banks are doomed."   Can I pop the cork yet!

buzzsaw99's picture

don't hold your breath.

jus_lite_reading's picture


VERY BAD NEWS!!! AND NOW SAAB is out of money also!!! YAY!!

FOREX loop.'s picture

I don't think they are going to go down that easy. These banks are monstrous, I'm thinking something more inline with this guy's thoughts...

Basically, the sheep are going to be placated by the droping gas prices and etc. to not notice while the noose tightens over the summer.

I think I need to buy a gun's picture

gold revaluation to recapitalize the worlds banks


remember his comments yesterday

 "banks need more capital and the banks need a better quality capital" hence gold

AldoHux_IV's picture

It makes sense and a good hedge for the world's banks-- which is why anything short of revolutionary change in our political system, monetary system, and breaking down of institutions will be a failure in taking advantage of a great opportunity during this financial crisis and turning.

bigdumbnugly's picture

yeah, i caught that too and i didn't think he was talking about prettier pictures of dead presidents on the FRN's.


stewie's picture

No, he'll go for plastic bills, like in Canada: A true world leader in "better quality capital"




augie's picture

One more straw on the camels back... I really need to invest in a good pair of galoshes for the inevitable shit storm this will bring.

Imposible to walk in this footing at all...

HungrySeagull's picture

Don't forget boot chains, sold at your favorite tire chain retailer.


Looks like Aflac is now roasted.... duck. Someone eats good tonight yah?

hpx's picture

Serial insolvent ponzi-government knockout contest!

centerline's picture

Precisely why everything will be done to avoid the first domino from falling.  The only problem here is that it WILL fall at some point.

Ray1968's picture

Not good. AFLAC should have bought gold instead.

Roger Knights's picture

There was one insurance company that did so a few years back, "Northwestern"-something, I think.

plocequ1's picture

You mean that hybrid Gilbert Godfrey/ Duck? Who would of ever thunkith

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Have no fear. The AFLAC duck is calming the stock market as I write.


wombats's picture

This one is soon to become Peking Duck.

Apocalicious's picture

With respect to our eventual overlords, that's pronounced Beijiing kao ya.

augie's picture

Who needs a circus when you have an adorable duck to distract the populace?

GeneMarchbanks's picture

His cuteness makes you wanna buy RIMMM extra 'M' for good ...  ...

It's been a pleasure.

augie's picture

His "cuteness" makes me wanna grab my mossberg and get off this damn screen and get into the marsh. 

augie's picture

What? All this talk about duck made me hungry, they taste the same in June as they do in october.

Big Corked Boots's picture

The only thing I hate more than that duck is that fucking green lizard.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The best of both worlds. Don't overlook the stack of cash with the eyeballs.

GeneMarchbanks's picture

This should be a real commercial for Corona and at the end an ice cold bottle falls out of the clear blue Mexican sky to land on the lizzard. SPLAT! Blood everywhere Corona bottle rescues the day. I'm pitching this to Dos Equis as well... they are delicious also.

alien-IQ's picture

have no fear...the London market is closed now. the algos can take over and ramp the market straight into which point the wheels will come off and close at a new LOD

DonutBoy's picture

Wow.  It's all going to go down.  Can you imagine investing in yen for safety?  More gold!

wombats's picture

Sheesh!  Just let the Greeks default and get it all over with so the rest of the world can get on with the reset....

ebworthen's picture

Nah, reset should have happened back in '08, global "deny responsibility and delay consequences for unhealthy choices" meme in full force.  The regular responsible hard working family will be fleeced, cooked, put down and/or oppressed in Orwellian style until the post-industrial narcissistic and juvenile information/pudding economies of the world houses of cards collapse.

cdskiller's picture

"But such is life in the unwind phase of the biggest global ponzi ever conceived, in which the smallest mark to market event on the global financial balance sheet in which everyone's assets are someone's else liabilities and vice versa, will launch the biggest house of cards collapse in history."

I just thought the sanguine, yet terrifying brilliance of that sentence, encapsulating this Orwellian moment in our history with such clarity, deserved repeating. This is why we come to the Mecca of zerohedge.

Bam_Man's picture


It's all right there in that one sentence. The explanation for all the lying, stealing and fraud we see on a daily basis is right there.

stewie's picture

Which is why Greece will never default.  Too much capital on the line.  

richard in norway's picture

is there a zerohedge equivalent in Europe/uk, i'm starting to feel that i know too much about the US situation and not enough about my own neighbourhood

NotApplicable's picture

While not exactly equivalent, is always a good read.

ebworthen's picture

As colonial progenitor of our government and early culture - as well as the former world power and our #1 ally - our fates are inextricably linked - just as our banks are.   

janus's picture

The sentence snagged my attention as well.  Nice symmetry, good meter, etc.  To my mind, Tyler needs to equip himself with some grim, doom-fostering metaphors.  Book of Revelation type stuff (you know, bowls of wrath, scrolls, voices sounding like rushing waters -- iconic imagery and the like), that shit hasn't been more apropos since the Black Death.

Bring out your dead.

Tense INDIAN's picture

........."biggest house of cards collapse in History..."...i have to admit ...sometimes it feels really SCARY

jowenchrist's picture

At the time of his death, my dad said, "well, it's time to get this over with". Me too, I ready for the whole bullshit facade to colapse; let's get it over with.

Vergeltung's picture

your Dad sounds like he was a brave guy. god bless.


Chuck Walla's picture

I was thinking the same thing. There's comes a moment when we just have to plow on through.