Chuck Schumer On The "Biggest Issue" In The NYSE Takeover

Tyler Durden's picture

Forget that the NYSE is being taken over by a German company (sorry guys, nobody is that dumb to buy the bs argument that Fidelity investors, all of whom are "undeniably" American, own both). The biggest nut apparently is the supremely superficial: i.e., what will be the name of the post-merger exchange. No, this is not an Onion summary. And yes, on this issue Chuck Schumer is relentless...

U.S. Senator Charles E. Schumer released the following statement on the planned merger of the New York Stock Exchange and Deutsche Borse:

“There are many things to like about this announcement, especially that it will open up new markets to NYSE and keep New York the world’s leading financial center. There is a long way to go before this is a done deal, and I will reserve judgment until all the details are settled. An outstanding issue that is important to me is the name of the new exchange. NYSE is one of the most preeminent brands in the financial industry, and there is no reason it shouldn’t come first in the new exchange’s name. If Deutsche Borse pushes any alternative name, it would be an indication that they are not viewing this deal as a merger of equals and that could have negative consequences with regard to future decisions on the merger’s implementations. The New York Stock Exchange will be the crown jewel in this new operation, and the name of the new company should reflect that.”

--U.S. Senator Charles E. Schumer

Um, newsflash: it is not a merger of equals: the DB is effectively buying the NYSE. But who cares about math (not the president - has anyone seen the budget?)

What we want to know is whether this means that our attempt to change the vernacular appellation of HFT to "fully computerized scalping, frontrunning and churning" is a no go? Or changing the name of BATS to Flash Crash central? Or Nasdaq to Hijacked Hacker Haven? But how will people know the truth about the nature of the beast if it is not properly reflected in the name???

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Alcoholic Native American's picture

lol who can afford a NYSE in this economy!

chumbawamba's picture

...that could have negative consequences with regard to future decisions on the merger’s implementations.

Like your broke nigger ass will have any say in the matter.

I am Chumbawamba.

Kaiser Sousa's picture

"Like your broke nigger ass will have any say in the matter.

I am Chumbawamba."

no, ur a fucking cowardly asshole...being a virtual racist is a lot less painful than sayin shit to someones face aint it.......

chumbawamba's picture

Um, excuse me, but upon what basis have you determined that I am racist?  Racist against whom exactly?

I am Chumbawamba.

AbandonShip's picture

You used the N-word and it's pretty derogatory to African Americans.  Can't do that, we're not in the '50s anymore.

Bringin It's picture

Chumba -you've run into the Chuck Shummer Action Acttack Posse.  They're gonna insist on the use of approved language while they tear the house down.  No if ands or buts.

From yesterday

The purpose of Newspeak was not only to provide a medium of expression for the world-view and mental habits proper to the devotees of Ingsoc, but to make all other modes of thought impossible. It was intended that when Newspeak had been adopted once and for all and Oldspeak forgotten, a heretical thought—that is, a thought diverging from the principles of Ingsoc—should be literally unthinkable, at least so far as thought is dependent on words. Its vocabulary was so constructed as to give exact and often very subtle expression to every meaning that a Party member could properly wish to express, while excluding all other meanings and also the possibility of arriving at them by indirect methods. This was done partly by the invention of new words, but chiefly by eliminating undesirable words… The vocabulary consisted of words which had been deliberately constructed for political purposes: words, that is to say, which not only had in every case a political implication, but were intended to impose a desirable mental attitude upon the person using them.  - George Orwell, 1984

Fred123's picture

Me thinks there is a nigger in the woodpile somewhere in this deal.

Milestones's picture

What the F--- does the 50's have to do with the word??? Were you growing up during that time? I was and I really don't get your drift. It wasn't used by anyone unless you knew the dude.     Milestones

StychoKiller's picture

Well, slap my 'fro and knock da black off me!  You can look forward to just about every post of yours bein' greeted by "Jive!"

nhsadika's picture

IS Schumer being paid as a brand-consultant in addition to his regular gig as political diversion?


Red Neck Repugnicant's picture

How long before Michele Bachmann gets confused and drafts emergency legislation preventing Obama from replacing the US dollar with the Deutsche mark?  Remember her (and Hannity's) "reserve currency" confusion?

Mullets/Bullets/Tea Party 2012

Weimar Ben Bernanke's picture

Man what is your gripes against the second amendment. Many libertarians in this blog,and I know are either deist,atheist,or agnostic. Second Bachman is a traitor for voting for the patriot act. You should know by now the Tea Party was coopted by neocon war mongers. The movement is dead. Many libertarians see Bachmann,Palin,Beck,Hannity,Savage,O'Reilly are nutcases who just hate muslims and war mongers.

UGrev's picture

You can add Allen West to that list too..  

lincolnsteffens's picture

I'm a Libertarian, a Liberal and a Conservative. Nobody is all one label. I just applied for a Licence to Carry. I'm against violence, the death penalty, lying pols., and you.I like Glenn Beck and can't stand O'Reilly. I'm for a woman's right to get an abortion but fundamentally don't like it.I like Bachmann and detest M.Savage. I speak for myself. I hate any religious fundamentalist that thinks he has a right to tell me how I must behave the same as I detest the overreaching power seized by our Govt. over the last twenty years. I detest the system that allows government and quasi-government entities to prop up the TBTF but I think placing limits on what one can earn is horse shit. I'm an atheist but respect peoples religious beliefs.

So what the f... am I?? Huh?? 

ZerOhead's picture


nutcase (plural nutcases)

  1. (humorous) An eccentric or odd person.
  2. (pejorative, slang) Someone who is insane.
Red Neck Repugnicant's picture

So what the f... am I?? Huh?? 


I'm not sure, but I'll bet you're bisexual with a major personality disorder. 

ZerOhead's picture


nutcase (plural nutcases)

  1. (humorous) An eccentric or odd person.
  2. (pejorative, slang) Someone who is insane.

I think you've about nailed it! :)

Hugh G Rection's picture

Amen.  Ron Paul wins second CPAC straw poll in a row and the necon douchers continue to push Huckabee, Romney, Palin.  Fucking R vs D puppetshow. 


I don't think the movement is dead though. Lots of us are seeing through the false paradigm, and the bullshit MSM.

homersimpson's picture

Redneck - you need to move on with your bitter life against conservatives.

Bernanke/Welfare/Unions 2012

Crime of the Century's picture

Imagine that, an article that reflects badly on Sen. Schumer and you can't wait to try and derail it into the comfortable mud of your own backyard. Does your mother let you drive?

Bringin It's picture

Well said CoC. The Chuck Shummer Action Acttack Posse has a whole stinking bag full of tricks.

Freddie's picture

No - Libs like you elected the muslim in the white hut who is destroying America.

StychoKiller's picture

re:  Bachmann -- Augghh!  The stupid, it burns!

TomJoad's picture

"Merger of Equals..."


Soon the Schumer WILL hit the fan.


Jump! You Fuckers!

Mae Kadoodie's picture

Bernank/Schnitzel Bourse

Joe Davola's picture

Google political->English translator spit out:


I can make these Kraut's lives miserable if they don't attend my $5000/plate fundraisers.

SpeakerFTD's picture





TradingJoe's picture

Fuck! Das ist wirklich zum Totlachennnnn!

Mad Max's picture

Arbitrage macht frei...

SpeakerFTD's picture

Scheiss.  That was much better than mine. 

iDealMeat's picture


Alle Computer gehören zu uns


TideFighter's picture

Steve Jobs phoned in:

"I'd like you to call it the iMarket!"

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Will you settle for a compromise of I-Me-Mine-Market?  It seems to capture the zeitgeist more completely.

Cathartes Aura's picture

All through the day
I me mine, I me mine, I me mine
All through the night
I me mine, I me mine, I me mine
Now they're frightened of leaving it
Everyone's weaving it
Coming on strong all the time
All through the day, I me mine

paul always was a conniving lawyer'd up greed-head. . .

Seasmoke's picture


Hephasteus's picture

Is this schumer humor? Am I seeing schumer humor? Zerohedge used to be so awesome. Now it's just filled with racists and silly comedians. :)

wretch's picture

Still is awesome, but anyone can post.  Take, for only two examples, our stupid-ass posts.

downrodeo's picture

I've been trying to police myself in regards to this issue ever since CD posted his piece about the absence of the 'ZH veterans'. I'm trying to refrain from saying anything at all unless I have something intelligent and substantive to add to the discussion. Oh, Shit. Yes, I just realized it too. Starting NOW!  

Absinthe Minded's picture

You don't have to read the comments.

dick cheneys ghost's picture

just wait until the fed gov starts selling the national parks. its coming

Cathartes Aura's picture

most likely, as they are "so expensive to maintain" - and given the Chinese are already buying hefty chunks of "commercial real estate" and housing on the left coast, and Canadian farmlands. . .

may as well put a price tag on "Old Faithful". . .

smlbizman's picture

turd and sgs..please put the annoymous part of ur post back....i and i bet a few others don't have the required accts. to post....i understand ur reason. sorta but i think u lost a lot of this since the removal....sorry off topic but i can't post on the turd or sgs.....couldn't you just give us math problems instead??

crosey's picture

I am still slightly amazed that this purchase continues to be relatively quiet news item.  I am also very interested in seeing how the SEC will continue with any hope of meaningful oversight.

Or was this the plan all along?  Nevermind, besides, it's not how you feel, it's how you look, and you look

dwdollar's picture

While were at it, lets stamp "Made In America" on anything coming from China.  It will raise animal spirits.