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The Credit Bubble Peak CMOs Are Back
Compliments of the melt-up market, brokers are so giddy they have opened up the "2007 - Boiler Room" folder and are selling whatever 2 year old toxic garbage is left to the most unwitting dumb money they can find. This is how excrement attempts to move from the balance sheet of a trillion asset BHC to the back pocket of potential investor XXX (luckily, XXX was smart enough to not only say go to hell, but to share a warning with the rest of Zero Hedge readers who may soon be targeted by comparable snakeoil salesmen).
Dear XXX:
The following is a brief synopsis of the particular's about the CMO trading platform:
Monetization of CMO
In a normal functioning economy CMO's usually sell for about 1 to 1.5b per! In todays economy they are selling for 1m per or 1 tenth of their original value.
The U.S. government has quietly begun pushing money into the real estate mortgage system to prevent further damage.
As a result there are now trading platforms that are trading in CMO's and offering very high yields to those who own them and monetize them through these platforms. For example:
If you purchase a CMO for 1m and place that instrument with the platform that XXX has access to you will obtain an LTV of 25% on 1b or $250m!
The platform will take 20% and 10% will be paid to the intermediaries. You will receive/monetize at 70% or $175m! The platform will hold the CMO for 40 weeks! After which time it will be returned or turned over! Whichever you prefer.
All participants must purchase CMO's from XYZ Bank! They must also provide the following:
CIS
Copy of passbook with thumb print.
Proof of Funds (Bank statement is acceptable)
After client has cleared due diligence and reviews contract he will be placed in direct contact with the trader's to discuss and formally agree upon the stated terms at which point he will be invited to join the platform.
The total process should take no more than 15 days!
And in 16 days... Poof, it's gone.
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NRF is out there spewing new offerings, and the leeches are out in full-force (coldcalling distibutors). It really does feel like JT Marlin just recruited two years worth of new college dropouts.
This is real?
There is still "cash on the sidelines" that needs to go
poof.
A greedy fool and his money are soon parted.
Still wanna fix the big, bad corrupted system. Exactly what are we saving. URL below.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090721/ts_alt_afp/uspoliticscaliforniabudget
What is the "b" and "m" here ?
Seriously, this is real?
Moreover, they are actually finding takers?
This is the edited duplicate of the actual solicitation.
ha ha
Lol. You know, it sounds just like a nigerian 409 scam, words are different but that structure is quite similar. Learning from the masters?
trust me, you would have more chance making money with the nigerians.
Thank you Mr. Durden! Just a busted up old working stiff here. I really enjoy reading your blog! We'll never regain our liberty without the great unclean masses contrbution,who of course are manipulated/brainwashed completely. That this is the first they have learned about the owners of the fed shows the enormity of the struggle before us. They are not willing to control their own freedom, and therefore makes me question whether they deserve it. Will you consider that all revolutions start in the belly? Until they lose their tv,s and xboxes,we are trying to accomplish this, way outnumbered. Maybe the way to out kungfu the evil bastards isn't by pushing back but to help them take away the food, so the dross will finally get off the couch and get mad enough to do what they should have been doing all along? Being ever vigilant against all enemy's foreign and domestic? Thank- you Tyler, Frank
Is there a way for me to profit personally from this plan of yours? -Sincerely, L. Blankfein.
yo Tyler ... what do the letter b and m stand for in this scam ... million and billion maybe ?
the real question is whether i get a free veggamatic with every purchase! If I get the option i might take the Popeil Pocket Fisherman instead!
while my account is pending approval, i cant help but to post this Dollar Cost Losing, i mean Averaging Calculator....just type in a symbol, and start and end dates....1998 to 2009 is a nice 12 year period....C, GM, CAL....plenty of good symbols to try as well..........
http://www.buyupside.com/calculators/dollarcostave.php
and lets not forget commission or management fees!!!
can you believe this question i got? (minus nine) minus (minus seven) equals...jeesh
It could be worse. We could all live in the guinea pig, I mean California.
Oh crap...
"Yessss, Neo!"
OMFG I want 10 of them and an upsized coke and extra fries!!1
I had some asshole want 100mm from me... and offered a 20% return. He said he'd buy 'totally secured' office blocks etc. What a asshole. I asked if the return was indicative of the risk and he was like, 'no, no risk at all!'
Right... I believe you are much as all the boiler rooms that call.
And this is not from a--I almost said disreputable bank, but that sounded stupid beyond belief.
Can you give us a hint about the bank in question? Top 5, something??
S&P upgrades CMBS to AAA week after downgrading to BBB-
http://blogs.reuters.com/rolfe-winkler/2009/07/22/sp-upgrades-cmbs-to-aa...
"to be eligible for TALF financing from the Fed, MBS and CMBS have to be rated AAA from at least two of the big credit rating agencies."
S&P up 20 pts tomm. and 1,000 by week's end....I think Goldman and Credit Suisse meant by end of week, not end of year????
That is just fucking SICK! GOD DAMMIT!
The TALF CMBS is about to be christened by DDR, and the tidal wave is on the horizon. The corruption is beyond sickening.
Continuing the fun had with a photo over the weekend, let's play - Where in the World is this?:
http://img.timeinc.net/time/daily/2009/0903/standard_poors_0320.jpg
Lol.. Jesus, sounds like a nigerian scam letter... Omfg what have we become.. What kind of world are we raising our children in *sigh*
What exactly is this? I've never seen a solicitation so silly. It has an 'English as a second language' feel to it. Are they really trying to get people to put up cash to buy CMOs and pay 30% of the income stream to the dealer? I can't decide if this falls under the Investment Company Act or RICO.