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Deposed Tunisian President Ben Ali Said To Have Fled Country With 1.5 Tons Of Gold

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Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:12 | 880408 cxl9
cxl9's picture

But he can't eat it.

 

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:16 | 880420 hamurobby
hamurobby's picture

yea but I bet the baggage handlers were pissed.

I can see it now... "how many bags sir?"

 "just four, do you have a fork lift?"

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:29 | 880438 66Sexy
66Sexy's picture

gold: because its the international currency. plus gold can be used for untraceable bribes... just ask our representatives in washington about that one...

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:51 | 880476 Fish Gone Bad
Fish Gone Bad's picture

This is just like the Marcos's departure from the Phillipines, only with gold.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:53 | 880480 Trimmed Hedge
Trimmed Hedge's picture

"This is just like the Marcos's departure from the Phillipines, only with shoes."

 

Fixed.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 11:05 | 881571 Golden monkey
Golden monkey's picture

Greedy bullionsless stupid (arabic) monkey.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:57 | 880566 fleur de lis
fleur de lis's picture

Check this out -- these gold-napping stunts have been going on for a long, long time. It's a wonder we still function as a country with DC being nothing but a rats' nest of marauders and pirates.

http://www.peterdavidbeter.com/docs/all/dbaltpcs.html

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:01 | 880492 Gold...Bitches
Gold...Bitches's picture

yea but I bet the baggage handlers were pissed.

Wrong.  Think how much 'baggage' goes missing on US airlines.  This is Tunisia we are talking about.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:15 | 880507 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

It was probably on pallets, and under heavy guard. Baggage handlers never saw one thing, nor did they want to see it.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:21 | 880679 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

All these countries hold gold to appease the Annanuki upon their return!

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 23:14 | 880825 Dr. Gonzo
Dr. Gonzo's picture

Dam aliens planning on stealing all our gold. I hope the mother ship doesn't have the towing capacity to take the silver too. 

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 13:47 | 882040 Hook Line and S...
Hook Line and Sphincter's picture

The Annunaki also like our women as well. That pic that Robot posted yesterday of that beauty with all that gold on her better start carrying around some alien contraceptives if she doesn't want to have a mutant human/annunaki spawn growing inside of her!

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:42 | 880544 TuesdayBen
TuesdayBen's picture

Actually, I believe Ben Ali could have avoided baggage-handling fees since just one carry-on bag might get the job done, as I believe 1.5 tons of gold would be a 16"-sided cube...

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 20:41 | 880629 SayTabserb
SayTabserb's picture

Pretty close. Gold weights 1204 lbs. per cubic foot, so 3,000 lbs (1.5 tons) is about 2.5 cubic feet.  A standard gold bar weighs about 30 lbs, so 100 of them will also get the job done. Just buy an extra seat and leave Mrs. Ali in Jeddah.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 09:05 | 881204 bunkermeatheadp...
bunkermeatheadprogeny's picture

The article spells ton as tonnes, as in a metric ton, which is 1,000 kilos, or 2,205 lbs.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 20:13 | 880592 f16hoser
f16hoser's picture

That was funny!

 

hoser

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 22:06 | 880743 goldfish1
goldfish1's picture

3,000 pounds? Ain't easy to haul around.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:12 | 880501 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

Its probably gold plated tungsten bars......Duh !!!

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:34 | 880528 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

That'll put the W in WTF?!

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 20:37 | 880624 blunderdog
blunderdog's picture

Bravo.  That's some funny stuff.  Chemgeek humor!

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 04:57 | 881108 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

no no, the have the FED & US gov. markings on them...

 

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 11:08 | 881576 Golden monkey
Golden monkey's picture

Bars substitution can and will be done.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 20:02 | 880575 Fanatic
Fanatic's picture

Yes, he can. Will take som time, though.

Gold is food additive E175.

http://www.food-info.net/uk/e/e175.htm

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:05 | 880658 malikai
malikai's picture

Dietary restrictions : 
None, E175 can be consumed by all religious groups, vegans and vegetarians.

Thank god for that! I was afraid gold was unsuitable for vegans.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 00:42 | 880933 knukles
knukles's picture

A lady at a Rotary luncheon was having trouble deciding between the pasta or chicken and a friend asked he why she'd consider the chicken at all as she's a vegan.  To which vegan lady replied that she was only a part time vegan.  And I pointed out that it was thus OK to have the pork rind sandwich as pigs eat vegetables and are thus vegetarians.

See the shit I have to put up with out here in California? 

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 01:47 | 880991 Dr. Sandi
Dr. Sandi's picture

I was at a middling nice restaurant tonight. One corner of the menu had "Vegetarian and Light Fare." Included was the Bacon Cheeseburger Deluxe. Now that's MY kind of Vegetarian food!

Bacon Cheeseburger, the antidote to the Vegan scourge.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 23:41 | 880855 bonddude
bonddude's picture

He's a piker.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 00:19 | 880907 midtowng
midtowng's picture

He left over 5 tonnes behind.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 01:10 | 880959 alagon
alagon's picture

*golf clap*

well played you witty son of a bitch.

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 03:09 | 881055 Onohymagin
Onohymagin's picture

Sounds like most of Tunisia has that problem. Eating that is.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:13 | 880410 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

Things HAVE changed. Saddamn Heusiin found in a hole with breifcases full of dollars. Now we find them with gold. Dollars fucked.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:58 | 880568 MarketTruth
MarketTruth's picture

And just a few years ago rappers wanted to be paid in Euro (not dollars) and flashed them in music videos. Now it is gold... bitches!!!

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 00:43 | 880936 knukles
knukles's picture

Ha ha ha hah.  Dumbassfucktards.

 

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:13 | 880413 FunkyMonkeyBoy
FunkyMonkeyBoy's picture

He's got more gold than Fort Knox for sure.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:36 | 880532 MayIMommaDogFac...
MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

According to some estimates, half of the people on ZH have more than Fort Knox. 8-P

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:00 | 880653 Al Gorerhythm
Al Gorerhythm's picture

If the USA has 73.9% of its reserves held as gold and australia has 8.1% of gold held in its reserves, what has Australia got as "other" reserves that places its currency on par with the US? There are only 25million people in that country and yet their economy and currency is on par. Something seems out of kilter. Either the US has no gold and the market is discounting that, or the Australians have more gold than they are willing to admit. Maybe there are other reasons, but it just seems odd.

Perhaps the fact that everyone knows that the dollar is an options contract, and when time deterioration is taken into account, the dollar's value as a reserve asset (Australia and the world hold trillions) will eventually expire at zero. That should make the Aussie trump the USD (as a commodity backed currency). Deep storage bitches. Thae fact that it is not redeemable either, puts it in the same boat. The race to Zero is on. Does anyone know which currency option expires worthless first?

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:46 | 880711 BigJim
BigJim's picture

If the USA has 73.9% of its reserves held as gold and australia has 8.1% of gold held in its reserves, what has Australia got as "other" reserves that places its currency on par with the US?

 

It's not what Australia's got - it's what Australia hasn't got - an overinflated currency being further depreciated by a mad beardman.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 22:02 | 880739 Alienated Serf
Alienated Serf's picture

+1 mad beardman

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 01:04 | 880952 trav7777
trav7777's picture

Oz has coal, diamonds, gold, minerals, NG...

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 02:51 | 881042 Mentaliusanything
Mentaliusanything's picture

Other Hard currencies - Coal Uranium bauxite Iron ore Gold in natural state Loads of LNG wheat sugar cotton oil and lots of empty land that no one knows WHF's under the surface.

Oh yeah - its such a good place they are trying to swim over the Timor sea to get all the Free Cheese.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:14 | 880414 Cleanclog
Cleanclog's picture

That's a lot of moolah.  Why wouldn't the  Saudis want him!

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:15 | 880418 Cleanclog
Cleanclog's picture

Diamonds, emeralds and enriched uranium still the way to go though, on a weight basis.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:47 | 880714 BigJim
BigJim's picture

It's hard to get the enriched stuff through customs, in my experience.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 22:11 | 880750 Budd Fox
Budd Fox's picture

Besides customs..Isn't that lead lined suit you have to constantly wear with enriched uranium a real bugger??

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 19:16 | 880510 High Plains Drifter
High Plains Drifter's picture

One thing is for sure. No more adult beverages will be served for the duration of this stay there.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:17 | 880421 Trimmed Hedge
Trimmed Hedge's picture

I'll give him $500 an ounce.

 

Take it or leave it....

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 18:28 | 880444 mt paul
mt paul's picture

i'll give him 5000 RMB an oz ..

 

take it or leave it....

 

 

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 20:00 | 880571 MarketTruth
MarketTruth's picture

i'll give him $100,000,000,000,000 ($100 trillion) Zimbabwe an ounce.

Sun, 01/16/2011 - 21:52 | 880715 Hulk
Hulk's picture

I'll nail his hands to a board, using maple leafs as washers, and take his fingers and thumbs down a quarter inch at a time with a meat cleaver until he gives it up...

Mon, 01/17/2011 - 12:10 | 881750 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Aahh....to steal from a thief. The torture is just an added bonus.

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