DSK Bail Granted

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Thu, 05/19/2011 - 15:58 | 1292997 cossack55
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Do they accept Bitcoin?

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:11 | 1293071 bigdumbnugly
bigdumbnugly's picture

and what are all the "usual electronic appliances attached to his body" in DSK's case?

are pocket pussies electronic now?  i know they've made the old milton bradley battleship game electronic.

can't stop technology!

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:44 | 1293225 sgorem
sgorem's picture

damnmit! i wanted to use that "pocket pussy" line/joke first.....Hell, I can't even get up to take a piss and by the time I get back, BANG, new article, tons of posts, etc., damnmit...:) 

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 17:53 | 1293552 bigdumbnugly
bigdumbnugly's picture

i would never bogart the pocket pussy on you, sgorem.  Feel free to use it now that i'm done.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 18:25 | 1293646 dark pools of soros
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Thu, 05/19/2011 - 18:59 | 1293760 Misstrial
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Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:36 | 1293000 HUGE_Gamma
HUGE_Gamma's picture

there is an attractive pay package waiting for DKS as a Munich RE board member.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 18:40 | 1293655 Ropingdown
Ropingdown's picture

No doubt DSK gets one of the girls with the white armband at the M  Re parties.  And how can anybody junk someone on such a ludicrous topic?  Why?  The inverse, junk as flag, is the problem to begin with for DSK.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 15:57 | 1293001 trav7777
trav7777's picture

will he be raping women on that webcam?  Because there are a lot of people into watching that sort of thing...IMF needs funds

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:12 | 1293075 earnyermoney
earnyermoney's picture

He'll be raping his hand.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:20 | 1293096 falak pema
falak pema's picture

the question is is he ambidextrous?

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:45 | 1293219 ILikeBoats
ILikeBoats's picture

No he is a leftist.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 17:05 | 1293350 MachoMan
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probably won't have to keep the mouse hand on a mouse in the cell...

Fri, 05/20/2011 - 03:01 | 1294792 geekgrrl
geekgrrl's picture

I get the impression that you're the sort of person into that.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:00 | 1293002 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

If he keeps doing those gorilla impressions while on web cam, Jersey Shore might have some competition.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 15:57 | 1293003 Robslob
Robslob's picture

Next up after Bail

I did not knowingly resign my position as IMF Chief!

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 23:11 | 1294422 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

Then it's bail revoked

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:01 | 1293007 LivermoreJim
LivermoreJim's picture

Strauss promised the Judge not to flee

If he granted him sweet liberty

     -- At least not for a week

     When to France he would sneek

To party with Roman Polanski.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:36 | 1293180 ElvisDog
ElvisDog's picture

The HBO movie of this whole affair just won't be the same if he doesn't overpower his guards, speed to the airport, board a fueled-up G5, and zip off to France where he will be welcomed as a hero and elected the next President of France.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 19:33 | 1293834 tom a taxpayer
tom a taxpayer's picture

Getting bail for DSK was difficult. Bill Clinton had to vouch for his character. DSK will be staying at Clinton's office in Harlem. Like other executive suites, Clinton's office is more of a home away from home, with a bedroom, shower, maid's quarters, Sexually Transmitted Disease clinic, etc.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 22:14 | 1294279 Love and money
Love and money's picture

Mine's lame, but maybe inspiration will come (more slowly than he did with the maid, I'm sure)

There once was a randy old Gaul

Who took a political fall

Cause of charges he laid

A New York hotel maid

Who couldn't escape him at all.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 23:25 | 1294460 palmereldritch
palmereldritch's picture

There once was a plutocrat Dominique

Who’s alleged a sexual freak

A maid he did jump

His career in the dump

Thanks, Sarkozy Twitter leaks!

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:02 | 1293010 Cammy Le Flage
Cammy Le Flage's picture

He is so leaving.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:00 | 1293011 SloMoe
SloMoe's picture

I wonder, will his new digs have maid service?

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 17:30 | 1293475 Herman Strandsc...
Herman Strandschnecke's picture

and will he have le-mom-aid to drink ?

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:01 | 1293013 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

how did he come up with that million dollars bail ?  print it ?  steal it thru  taxation ?  he's a creep, it's a set up .

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:05 | 1293022 RobotTrader
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His buddies loaned it to him.  All his Davos and G-7 fellows ponied up to get him out of jail.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:02 | 1293027 dick cheneys ghost
dick cheneys ghost's picture

depends on what the definition of "print" is....

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:13 | 1293070 earnyermoney
earnyermoney's picture

Wire transfer from Timmay.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 17:07 | 1293347 trav7777
trav7777's picture

his wife wired it days ago.  Like day one, she just sent it over for him.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 23:58 | 1294552 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Oh, to be the FBI agent listening in on THAT phone conversation! :>D

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 23:59 | 1294558 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

Oh, to be the FBI agent listening in on THAT phone conversation! :>D

Fri, 05/20/2011 - 01:37 | 1294706 10kby2k
10kby2k's picture

In court he claimed his net worth at $2 million and did not have the rumored vast resources for wealth to pose a flight risk.  2 million ins't much.....so why the fuck is he claiming that he was charging the $3K/night room ton his personal credit card? People with only 2 million stay in $90 hotels.  What a fucking liar. Pure scum.....I could kill him if I wouldn't be prosecuted.  Guess I'm just an hardened man.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:03 | 1293014 Cammy Le Flage
Cammy Le Flage's picture

Or heart attack in bathtub.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:01 | 1293016 bobola
bobola's picture

He could record a web cam reality show with one of the Palins while he waits.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:03 | 1293017 RobotTrader
RobotTrader's picture

This is just the first step.

I guarantee this guy is going to get off easy.

Pay a big fine, and some community service, maybe a couple months behind bars, that's it.

Within 6 months of his release, he'll be swilling booze and chasing women with all the other G-7, Davos, and IMF Plutocrats.

Alpha Thugs and PigMen continue to rule.

Always have.

Always will.

Just look how much more power they obtained after the 2008 crash.  Bigger, fatter, stronger, wealthier than ever.

Nothing is ever going to change.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:13 | 1293081 Fat Ass
Fat Ass's picture

You are EXACTLY RIGHT.  So true.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 18:02 | 1293589 falak pema
falak pema's picture

coming from your avatar it sounds very sincere.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:01 | 1293019 fuu
fuu's picture

They already raping e'erybody out here.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:01 | 1293020 dick cheneys ghost
dick cheneys ghost's picture

bummer.......now, no bankers in jail........sad day

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:07 | 1293024 macholatte
macholatte's picture

Thumbs up for justice, home boy. Ha Ha.

Everything neatly arranged by the shadow IMF: Resign and get a lawyer, bail money, an expense account and a pension. But he might not get another invite to Bohemian Grove this year. Bummer.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:14 | 1293073 Vic Vinegar
Vic Vinegar's picture

I don’t think he kicks it there.  Bohemian Grove is for conservatives who enjoy consensual, homosexual sex and owl worship.  Socialists like DSK prefer straight rape.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 22:52 | 1294360 CompassionateFascist
CompassionateFascist's picture

I hereby unjunk one your (5) junks. This site needs an "unjunk" feature.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:06 | 1293029 keating
keating's picture

His lawyer shoulf arrange a dozen lie detector tests proving consent, then he should ove to have the charges reduced or dismissed so he can get his job back. Unless, of course, he could not pass the lie detector tests in which case he s in hot water...


Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:21 | 1293116 Dr. No
Dr. No's picture

Unless, of course, he could not pass the lie detector tests

Are you kidding, thats what the IMF demands of him everyday in business of central banking.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:40 | 1293192 ZapBranigan
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Polygraph test results are not admissible in any U.S. court of law.


Thu, 05/19/2011 - 17:44 | 1293526 falak pema
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polygraph penis tests are...

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 19:26 | 1293822 DeadFred
DeadFred's picture

The newer technologies based on brain activity imaging have not been excluded. They do require brain activity though and I'm not sure vampire or squid brains would work. I think you have to be human.

Thu, 05/19/2011 - 16:03 | 1293030 HUGE_Gamma
HUGE_Gamma's picture

there are people sitting in county jail for unpaid speeding tickets, or dont have $500 to post bail for petty misdomeaners and have to wait upto 45 days for a fair and speedy trial.

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