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The End is Nigh: How Goldman Sachs Triggered the Apocalypse
In case you’re wondering, that whistling sound you hear is the sky falling. When Erin Burnett stays late to host a special report on something, you know it’s a “game-metamorphosizer”. Why else would all bank stocks tank because a firm they’re not affiliated with was charged with non-criminal fraud in one transaction after months of SEC digging? Why else, at this very moment, are traders in Tokyo and Hong Kong counting down the minutes to when they can sell every last security on the planet ahead of the rest of the world this weekend? Why else would the price of gold – the ultimate refuge in times of uncertainty – be falling?
The simple fact that the market knows is that there is no uncertainty: Armageddon is upon us, and thus all the gold in the world has no value.
In its infinite wisdom, the always-rational, level-headed market knows that Goldman is finished once and for all. In fact, it’s already just a memory. A civil case whose maximum damages, including treble damages for fraud, are $3B could easily bankrupt a firm that had only $45B in revenue last year. Especially since there’s no chance this case will be settled without a trial for a small fraction of that amount. Why else would the only Google search term related to GS that’s more popular than “Goldman Sachs fraud” be “Goldman Sachs careers”? Everyone knows that the imminent liquidation will require lots of manpower and overtime. And even if, by some miracle, GS emerges from the SEC and inevitable investor litigation without resorting to Chapter 7, no one will ever do business with them again, which will cut their revenue to $0.00, which will require them to resort to Chapter 7.
And GS deserves to be destroyed for this particular transaction. To put their egregious behavior in the complicated CDO market in perspective, let’s break it down in terms of equities:
Let’s say a sophisticated investor – call him “Johnny the Jackal” -- tells an investment bank – call it “Dewey Goldmanthem & Howe” -- that he thinks a select group of stocks in the Russell 2000 index is a real dog. He asks the investment bank to create a new ETF that tracks the performance of the stocks he selected so that he can short it. The investment bank agrees, takes a fee, and unveils the newest ETF, the “Bow Wow 30” (ticker symbol: WOOF). Now let’s say a second sophisticated investor comes along – call it “Head-Up-Our-Ass European Bank” -- and says they believe the Bow Wow 30 represents the best companies on earth, and they want to go Hail Mary long. Even if DG&H doesn’t have a crystal ball, and even if it’s not sure which way the Bow Wow 30 is heading, it has a make-believe fiduciary duty under the pretend law to tell Head-Up-Our-Ass European Bank that there’s another investor who thinks the Bow Wow 25 is flea-ridden. Sure, Head-Up-Our Ass has analysts, lawyers, consultants and accountants who could do their homework on the companies in the Bow Wow 30, but it’s up to DG&H to tell them Johnny the Jackal knows better than them. That’s why every time you want to buy a security your broker sends you a list of all the people who've shorted it. GS broke the law because it didn’t provide the short list.
In addition to being the polite thing to do, this rule serves the important public policy of dissuading potential investors from investing whenever another investor disagrees with their judgment. The efficient functioning of the capital markets is all about no one buying when someone else wants to sell and no one selling when someone else wants to buy.
Not that politeness, public policy or capital markets matter now that the end of days is apparently Monday. (Unless you live in Asia, in which case it’s Sunday). Time for everyone to get their affairs and souls in order.
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Marie Antoinette the Sixth, great- etc. etc. - grand daughter of King Louis XVI'S wife, when informed of this article on La Zero Hedge by her trusted servant Jeeves (the English provide the best help these days) said...
"Let them read dis-info !"
The Vampire Squid
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5J8eTT8xvaQ
Excellent post.
Reading through some of the posts disturbed me, then I remembered that it requires some degree of intelligence to fully comprehend satire and sarcasm. The posters that don't "get" the article should get their "IQ" checked immediately.
There have been many of us that have waited for a moment; a moment of wreckoning. Personally, I never thought that it would happen this way. I figured no light would be shown on the "God fearing" Golden Sachs boys, mostly because I figured we would slowly ride into "Armageddon". I have been waiting for marches on Washington and the like for over a year now. I had become cynical; I figured that the impending financial doom would not be recognizable until after the status quo had been beaten until broken. So I am absolutely amazed that the SEC is bringing this issue to light. The ramifications, as noted in the article, are dire.
Not only is GS' upper brass now on the hook, so are Paulson and Buffett (if only their so called reputations). I want to know why they chose to slit their wrists, instead of hoping nobody would notice that they had perpetrated America's assets. However, they being the financial suicide bombing extraordinaires they are, I am not wholy surprised. Anyway we look at it, there is now a wrench in the sprocket. Will this drive the Dow Jones down to 1,000? Will the markets dive down and then up in sporadic jumps of 100 and 200 point intervals until The Street become sick to their stomach? Could we see a Warerloo event where the market dive to the bottom is like one off a cliff only then to go parabolic a laRothschilde? Will they merely continue their unending upward skying that will catapult all asset classes to numbers unrecognizable.
I still know what I know, and I know gold and silver is money.
Just to give some sense of order amongst the chaos, the following predictions were made by me to confidants on Feb. 1st, 2010. The proof they say is in the pudding...
(1) Jesus of Nazareth will not appear descending from the clouds in his Second Coming ever in the next three years. (See Futures Contract Below. All bets welcome.)
(2) The Mahdi will not appear anytime either.
(3) The Third Temple will be built by the year 2050 in the designated site of the Mount in the Old City of Jerusalem.
(4) Japan will continue with its whaling program.
(5) More and more people will wake up to the fraudulent concept of "Man Made Climate Change".
(6) The nascent World Government will become more solid and influential.
(7) The 2011 ICC World Cup in India will suffer major problems with security.
(8) Attendance at the 2010 Sth.African World Cup will be substantially lower than previous events.
(9) The Hurt Locker will win the 2010 Best Picture Academy Award.
(10) ISAF numbers will not be reduced in 2010. The Dutch political vote will be seen to be a blip on the radar. 5
(11)Tiger Woods will play in a PGA Tour event before April 30, 2010.
(12) The sun will rise in the east and set in the west.
(13) G-d will not destroy the entire world in 2010, 2011 or 2012 or any other year. Remember the story of Noah and the Rainbow.
(14) The fact that the universe is stable, ordered, benevolent and expansive will become known to more and more people over the coming years.
(15) In decades hence this time time of human history (described by the word Koyaanisqatsi, which comes from the American Hopi Indian language. It translates as "life of moral corruption and turmoil" or "life out of balance.") will also be known as the early messianic era.
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I have a little game I would like to play. It is completely up to the Christian reader whether you want to join in. I have offered the same deal to quite a few people in many parts of the world at different times over the past seven years.
The game is called the "Second Coming 2020 Futures Contract".
This is how it works. As a Christian you will no doubt adhere to the belief that Jesus is returning to earth at some point in time for a second visit to terra firma. Because you hold this belief and that is why you are a Christian, you may be prepared to commit to something. Now I don't believe in the idea of the second coming, even though I believe Jesus was real and was one of the most important people to have ever lived. Now I will bet that he will never return. You can take a position and quite rightly profit from your belief. Jesus had a reasonable problem with the money-changers but he wasn't completely against the stuff.
For every dollar you invest I will pay you an amount = Your Stake x A Multiplier of 100 x The Number of Months Expired from the Start of the Contract when he Appears.
If he doesn't appear by the year 2020, you lose your stake. If you would like to bet again then we can renegotiate another "Special Carpenter Futures Contract". It is a very generous offer. To make things worthwhile the minimum bet you can make is $10.
Example...
Jesus of Nazareth reappears descending from the clouds with his donkey at the gates of Jerusalem via YouTube in December 2012. (Just to shut those silly mayan pagan worshippers up and those smart-arse film directors aswell.)
Your bet $10 x 100 x 37 months = $37,000 HOLY JACKPOT !!!
A good return in any stockbroker's language.
Interested...
P.S. Some Christian denominations are currently destroying themselves over certain issues. What did Napoleon say about opposing forces, their mistakes and intervention ? Anyway a point in question...Jesus approving of gay marriage would be like Michelangelo approving of the destruction of the Sistine Chapel. Homosexuality to the Jews in the first century was completely abhorrent. That is not to say there were not terrible violations also in the Jewish community of the time, thus the later exile. The Greeks and Romans were pederasts and homosexuals from way back and had tried to take over the region completely. Jesus was born a Jew remember. He would turn in his grave at the rubbish that has been promulgated in his name.
What about Moshiach? What odds are you offering for this one?
got any Godot 2020 LEAPs for sale?
That was funny! Obviously over Adam's head. (Insert visual image of pool cue slamming over a couple of beads....)
Definately over my head. My interest has been piqued now...You wouldn't like me when my interest is piqued !
I think I know what is being alluded to, but I am more interested with other geometries of consciousness. The financial realm must be subservient to the spiritual realm. I do like learning new things though to add to my knowledge base. I have always enjoyed wandering into new places and learning.
P.S. Do you prefer Pool, Snooker or Billiards ?
glass bead games?
What is your point ?
Are you referring to http://www.europe2020.org/spip.php?article626&lang=en ?
Please explain or forever hold your peace.
i was actually (sort of), good catch.
btw, not knockin your attempts to follow the money into the spirit, au contraire, but when you get into those realms, is there an above and below? is one subservient to the other or is it rather simply a function of amplitude & frequency of the pulsation?
The revelation of Moshiach as enunciated by the "Twelfth Article of Faith" unfolds over time. For the person anointed as the righteous redeemer/prince of peace/wise counsellor the process is interesting.
He will have inklings of his true purpose all throughout his life, but the pieces of the jigsaw puzzle will become clearer at certain specific times. The revelations will be intensely personal and private between G-d and himself. This will lead to feelings of surprise, wonder, awe, confusion, fear, anger, annoyance, lethargy, inspiration, invigoration and acceptance. He will learn how to orientate and position himself so as to best maximise his role and function in the service of the ultimate mission. He will be mis-interpreted by many people and will attract real hatred, envy, jealousy and vitriol. He will be very close to G-d. His power and influence will grow over time. G-d will assist him in his mission. He will create the conditions whereby his sovereignty will become self-evident.
Moshiach is only confirmed as such when he completes the following part of the prophesied job description...
(a) Ushers in an Age of World Peace. i.e. A decent level of the General Welfare for six billion people i.e. Safety, Food, Water, Shelter, Energy, Clothing, Work, Rest, Play, A Sense of Purpose/Meaning/Belonging/Identity, Intimacy/Companionship, Family, Creativity, Faith/Prayer, Mobility, Time and Space to Think, Feel and Act and the Rights of Citizenship et.al.
(b) Turns all people to the good, i.e. Gets them to act properly, increasing the positive side of the merit/demerit ledger. This is also known as turning all people to G-d.
(c) Re-institutes the Sanhedrin.
(d) Has a male heir.
(e) Builds the House for All Nations/Third Temple/Centre of Unfolding Potential in Jerusalem on the divinely ordained site.
(f) Stops re-runs of bad programs like Big Brother.
and last but not least
(g) Discovers the whereabouts of all the missing coat hangers and socks of the world.
All of these are possible by the year 2050.
A person who comes along who can rationally, scientifically, empiracally and honestly explain how all these things can be done will be the presumed Moshiach. He will thus have to be heeded in full. He will not be perfect by any means, but he will be both blessed and cursed with a certain worldview/frame of reference/divinely mandated mission.
The presumed Moshiach is alive and breathing right now doing his work.
P.S. I like puzzles. Collecting pieces of the jigsaw is fun. Especially when trying g to see the bigger picture. Some people can saw more pieces, more quickly than others. Anyway...Two of the above multiple choice answers are furphies. Can you spot them ?
Well, as far as the furphies, I will go with big brother and socks. Ain't no stopping them.
Gold Star to you !
Your posting name confuses me however. I am dylsexic. I often lie awake at night wondering whether there is a D-g.
I believe there is a D-g, maybe a whole pack. Too many coincidences...for example, last night, I saw a cloud shaped like a bone, and I looked down, and at my feet, a bone! Amazing!
-Xirdneh Nonnel Rm
Sounds like a scene out of "Fear and Loathing in Vos Legas".
Overtextended SP500 / DOW daily charts show bearish warnings and the next few days will tell us more.
DOW chart :
http://www.zerohedge.com/forum/latest-market-outlook-0
haha, not to be a dick, but don't the next few days ALWAYS tell us more? haha.
all you whinners can complain about what the man has written. i hope financials fall to 0. Really, Warren can use his GS stock certificates to wipe his phony ass. All these clowns are nothing more than con men. did you ever wonder what happened to the mafia? yes, they got suits and went to wall street and ran for public office. We just sit here and blindly agree with their free market b.s. Free for them to steal us blind. Good Job SEC, I hope. Go get some more balls and hang them on the wall street bulls horns!!!
JUST WENT MY FAITH IN ZH WAS BACK, HE ALLOWS WEAK POSTS LIKE THIS
My only regret is not having been swift enough to have taken advantage of the 49,900% pop in the GS April 165 puts. Went from .02 to $10 in minutes. Opportunities like that don't come around every day...but I suspect there will be a few more of them this year...in the Banking sector to be specific... I'm creating a watch list for high value detainees this weekend with quick trigger button next to way out of the money of the money puts...one of these days...it will pay off.
God Almighty, I just read some of the lame comments to this post. Look you dumb fucking cat pukes, it takes imagination to put together on the fly a post like this; imagination and a sense of humor. This is funny shit. It makes me laugh, which stops me from thinking about all the sorry ass mother fuckers like you that make me want to bite your ass off for taking up too much air of those who have a reason to be here and have been here doing what they can to round the edges off the fucked up situation we are all in and making us stop for one minute and realize we are all in this together and each person must step up to the plate and put a little lime on this stinking shit we call "the current situation" because if we don't laugh we are going to beat our children for no reason which leads to the wife running off with some idiot she met on the Facebook and our 17 year old daughters going off to get pregnant so they will always have someone in their life who will love them, until that kid turns 17, at which time the kid tells her mother, your daughter,to go fuck herself, and then comes to live with you when their kid is 3 because Romeo was a dick head that thought Zero Hedge was a website developed just for them.
Nice work Ben. Keep up it up. Some of us appreciate the time.
For the rest of you idiots, fuck you where you breath.
because if we don't laugh we are going to beat our children for no reason which leads to the
well laugh away spider breath ,
wash your laughing mouth with soap
Other than your wife leaving you, I can understand why you need a laugh.
For more laughs, check out Ned Zeppelin's multiple posts today at:
http://www.zerohedge.com/article/did-goldman-and-tourre-break-finra-regulations-not-reporting-fab-fabrices-wells-notice-recei
Ned had me laughing all day. Thanks a million Ned, I needed that!
F%$#ing thing went nuts on me, I tell you.
Ned, IMHO, that ranks up there with Abott and Costello's "who's on first"
Thanks again for the laughs, they don't come easy these days...
Children,
I think this is Marla's vehicle for telling everyone to grow the fuck up and stop expecting the government or heaven forbid, your broker to hold your hand every step of the way while you go shopping for high risk assets that you have absolutely no clue about. Just so you know, pretty much all securities transactions involve buying and selling parties who both think they have more or superior information or have more accurately assessed that information. And (brace yourself) they both stand to profit from being right. That's what makes a market. There is no fucking law that requires your broker to tell you who's shorted what you're buying.
As I posted earlier, let's also please not encourage Europeans, especially Germans to now sue over every American asset they've ever overpaid for...we'll all be tied up for years.
If I were paranoid I'd say this was a custom designed (SEC+GS) smoke bomb to distract ZH from other, far more important shit storms that are happening right now...not two and three years ago.
I started out thinking Goldman should get slammed for this, now I'm wondering if they shouldn't get some sort of award for providing an assist to Paulson who, along with Ackman and Einhorn was one of the few professional investors who actually DID SOME FUCKING HOMEWORK and had the balls to bet against the real estate/credit bubble when everyone else was cheer-leading it to the moon and heaping scorn upon all doubters. There was no guarantee Paulson was going to make a killing on this or that he'd do so within any affordable time frame.
If you think Golman Sachs are the sneakiest and smartest bastards in the room buy their goddamn stock. This shit is spilled milk.
Mother:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vgSn0SbQJQI
fine - but dont backstop the casino with taxpayer dough...
Yeah, that's the fucking axe I've ground to a goddamned hatchet. My taxes went to bail out GS among others. They can play all they like with their own money, not mine.
I hear you guys but I see that as the government's fault not Goldman's. If I remember correctly (Wells Fargo) refusing the funds wasn't an option.
+1000. Finally, chindit13 has some competition!
Ben Dover for dictator, oh-twelve!
Leo, let us know when it's done dipping, will ya?
Whoa, Tokyo and Hong Kong unloading? Don't they believe in our market like we believe in our market? Or do they believe in our market about as much as we believe in theirs?
Hey, we're far ahead out here, but not that far. Earth still turns in 24 hours.
As of this writing, Tokyo market opens in 14.5 hours. Me, I'm at 6PM Sunday night, about to cook a nice basil, garlic, sundried tomato linguini, with lots of black pepper and fresh parmesan, and washing it down with a super Tuscan. If this damn world is going to end, I'm going out with a full and happy belly and a slight buzz.
me, too†
am infatuated with time zones.
Moi? My wife and I are stuck here in Ravello, Italy at 8:30 PM Sun. night.
Can't get to my gold from here.
Guess we'll have dinner instead.
Ciao d'Italia!
Can't get to my gold from here.
Tell me where the stash is at and I'll go check up on it for you, just to make sure it OK !
my email address is: stealyourstash@gmail.com
Enjoy your vacation!
Ciao d'Italia!
i actually have verona 1:43 am tomorrow on my world clock. it helps me to put life in perspective.
rangoon it is 6:12 am tomorrow.
beijing 7:43 am tomorrow.
really challenged with anything that has numbers.
so see, i didn't know the world had halfs. kinda threw me.
GM,
That's 24 hours away. We're still Saturday here. They are Sunday, tomorrow night will be their Monday morning.
Dearest Howard, thanks for the comment! Apologies if my comment was confusing, I was just referring to Court Jester Ben Dover's comment "traders in Tokyo and Hong Kong counting down the minutes to when they can sell every last security on the planet ahead of the rest of the world this weekend"
As the masses wake up to the existential threat they will gather en-masse at the banks. This day will go down in infamy as Sunday Bloody Sunday. It will be massive !
http://www.bearishnews.com/post/281
The best Saturday night in a long time. Thanks to all who are participating.
Just wait until a fortified Velobabe shows up.
Thats when shit gets real interesting!
Where is that Vixen? I am ready for:
"hOlY Shet
half THINK this is a joke and the rest, well
i have wine(insert little cross sign)
and boobs
and I hate jPM
here is an article that shows how evil they are
i say i am a "dumb" blonde but really i am catherine austin fitts
hooray for wine(insert said cross)
diD I MENtion i like bOB dYlaN"
it's a dagger
i don't do cross's.
do you know where i can get HARD RAIN----
rolling thunder revue tour '76 video? that's all i need for my pusher man.
YOU, i bet you didn't know i taught sean lennon skiing for two weeks in '83. yoko blew out her knee, so she coudn't ski. it was great cause sean didn't have to have a body guard.
oh yeah you know what else? i dated hunter s thompson. just saying.
i dated hunter s thompson
Do you still paint pictures of Marilyn Monroe?
aaand she can see Russia from her house.