Goldman Launches Global Heat Mapping Tool To Serve Its Trigger Happy, ADHD Addled, Red Bull Chugging Clients
Domestic markets seem just a little too claustrophobic recently? The S&P's inability to breach 1,100 got you down? Trading in After Hours not the cash cow it used to be? The fix for gunning stocks ever higher 24 hours a day becoming irresistible? No clue what do with yourself in the hours between 4pm and 9:30 am? Have no fear, Goldman is here. All Goldman clients now have full access to a brand spanking news global heatmapping feature. US looking red, check out China (kinda green). China not doing it for you: Turkey, South Africa and New Zealand seem like a great place to stash cash for the next 10 minutes before the "urge" raises it ugly head.
Unfortunately, if more days like today are the norm, what little humans are left to trade, will be furiously scratching their heads, having to pick lighter shades of red. Alas, there is nothing in the disclaimer the indicates a bias against color blind heat mappers, so you will just have to wait a few days for the PDs to realize that green is so much better for generating outsized trading profits than red.