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Goldman: "We Raised S&P 500 EPS Estimates Despite Worst May Performance In Almost 50 Years"
Any 93 page David Kostin presentation that begins with those words, has to be devilishly good. The fact this it says that Buy rated Halliburton has 65% upside to Goldman's target price just makes it truly infernal. Goldman's disclosed ravenous "hatred" of AMD probably makes it the buy of the century. All this, egregiously gratuitous use of the word GARP, and many pretty charts await those brave enough to read through.
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They say it and so it shall be. Of course they release it just as bears become nervous again leading to another monumental squeeze.
I made it to page 14. Each page in the beginning looks just like white noise from a regression analysis with squat results. GARP. That's a new one for me. Growth at a reasonable price....I'm thinking those blueberry plants on late night TV have real GARP.
Main Entry: GARP
Part of Speech: noun
Definition:
the by-product of mixing Garbage with rotting Carp.
Example:
The whole thing reads like a giant load of GARP to me.
Carp recipe:
Take freshly caught carp and slit open and gut it. Leave the head on for extra flavor. Warm the oven to 375 degrees.
Saute a large onion and spread evenly through the carp. Add salt and pepper and close it up.
Wrap tightly in tin foil and put it in the oven. Cook for 45 minutes.
Once cooked, remove immediately from oven and let cool. Remove foil.
Immediately throw in garbage and set at end of drive. Guaranteed to keep away unwanted visitors for days.
Squeeze it is. Autos, census workers, summertime travel, lower gasoline prices, cheaper imports, refis, April home sales, tax refunds, stimulus round two, extended UI benefits... enjoy it while it lasts.
These guys are incorrigible!
"not reformable"
"Depraved"
Clearly they are working overtime to find every last fool.
Me, me. Please pick me. I'm an old and (ab)used fool from the 90's that really really does believe this is (finally) the opportunity of the century. I've got $15.22 from the piggy bank to invest and I could probably pull another $3.75 out of the sofa if you give me 15 minutes. And I supply my own K-Y.
Pick me. Please.
BTW, I can only invest about half of my wealth long term because I need to use the rest to bring the wife and kids to McDonald's for supper off the dollar menu.
HAHAHAHAHAHA Thank you CD..I needed a good botox breaking laugh..
Hilarious.
How many man hours did it take to produce that report??
I guarantee that Goldman's Prop Desk hasn't even read it, nor does it care.
They buy whatever is going up.
And sell whatever is going down.
And of course, they paint charts to shake out people out of both longs and shorts, depending on how heavily their biggest clients are invested in individual names.
Just plain simple momentum gunning and using various gangster tactics.
I guarantee that Goldman's Prop Desk hasn't even read it, nor does it care.
They told him what to write.
No, they really don't care.
Gulp,... Uh, nice tie.
By making even formerly safe places risky and threatening the populace with capital controls on foreign accounts...the US has done a great job of making the only choice the fake financial markets or gold. I'll take gold.
"Goldman's disclosed ravenous "hatred" of AMD probably makes it the buy of the century."
^This.
How they can out this shit in print is beyond comprehension, but when you control the markets and can make them go where you want I guess it is OK. Oh and that bullshit about the ratings agencies, give me a friggin break. Fucking sham fucking city. This bullshit will stop one day and when it finally does we'll all be in Washington and on Wall St with torches and pitchforks. Fuck those lying ass mother fuckers.
FucknA+1000
You apparently never worked on the Street.
Search word: fuck
Replace with: ,
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, GS sold 4.5 million shares of BP stock by "accident" on April 1, 2010 and is currently shorting HAL, SLB and RIG while lifting them to a "buy" on their preferred list.
None of the "analysis" really bothers/matters. The key is to be nimble, have lots of cash available, and to trade with tight stops. So they think in three months the S&P will be at 1160? Hell, 2 days like today and it will be at 1160. Then what? Sell everything? If there's no more margin of safety than that then the gold bugs are surely right. If the S&P was at 800 or Nic's 380 then it may be worth diving in.
Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. Jack burned his ass on the wrong side of he candlestick.
I worked for GS for 5 years. Kostin is a patsy but is completly oblivious to the role that he is playiing. With tremendous volume and compelling analysis he builds his case, but the firm is far too smart to follow a retail strategy. It may be an exagerration to suggest that GS is a contrarian market indicator, but I do believe that their book comes ahead of any client interests.
Shrubber,
Your words are dead on accurate. GS advice is Borderline contrarian, and definitely the GS book has priority over GS clients. This article from Bloomberg gives a short glance at the difference. And we're not even getting into proprietary trading here, this ZH thread doesn't have enough space for that.
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601109&sid=aF5tV7uvY0FU
June we will see worst Dow drop in 50 years. HP just laid off 9000 mid-class.
you mean dow to 36000 right and then drop from there did you not ?
market dont care about HP or any other layoffs.
On their list of unattractive stocks, GS should recommend selling Gap, Inc. under ticker GPS, lest a stock holder of the Great Atlantic and Pacific Tea Company inadvertantly click sell on ticker GAP. I would expect a portfolio strategy by da boyz to at least get the symbols right.
You really have to love the headlines when markets go up, its all "HOPE" of this or "HOPE" of that. Since when do markets trade on hope and not fundamentals? Oh , forgot, when Obama showed up. Almost had a memory lapse there for a sec.