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Goodbye Teenage Wasteland: Bank Of America Pulls A Benjamin Button, Reenters Single Digits

Tyler Durden's picture


It was fun while it lasted. Next up: 1 to 10 reverse split? At least that way the bank will now only hit but triple John Paulson's $30 price target by the end of 2011. In the meantime, only $50 cents or so to go until BAC hits Paulson's cost basis.


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Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:00 | 1460223 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Speed Downhill Racer


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:29 | 1460340 static
static's picture

Mortgage Matterhorn

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:29 | 1460348 Pladizow
Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:40 | 1460380 WilliamShatner
WilliamShatner's picture

Bob is awesome, and so are your tits.


My January $10 puts are making me smile, and so are your tits.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:00 | 1460446 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

The secret to making something appear more valuable than its intrinsic value is to hide it from public view and then restrict access.

(Sergio, inventor of the modern bra)


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:20 | 1460505 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

My January $10 puts are making me smile, and so are your tits.

"My $10 puts me smile your tits?"


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:23 | 1460526 Blano
Blano's picture

Few things in life are more valuable than a pair of live boobies staring you in the face.  Usually the fun's just begun.  Just sayin'.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:48 | 1460630 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Personally I wouldn't want them staring me in the face because that would mean she's a good foot taller than me, making here easily 7'4".

Other than that I totally agree with you. :)

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:32 | 1460831 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

sitting down sex?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:37 | 1460852 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Yes, I am sitting down. Are you having sex? :)

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:49 | 1460633 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

Aztlan!! Bitchez!!!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 21:28 | 1461428 sun tzu
sun tzu's picture


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:57 | 1460676 chunga
chunga's picture

It's all part of being a mammal...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:04 | 1460715 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I find it hilarious how we insist that we are all civilized humans.........right up until the point where we want to rut in the mud like mammals.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:05 | 1460723 fuu
fuu's picture

Like they do on the Discovery Channel.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:58 | 1460925 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Or Animal Planet.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 18:48 | 1461127 Dr. Engali
Dr. Engali's picture

Don't forget women's big time wrestling.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:16 | 1460492 Pladizow
Pladizow's picture

To: WilliamShatner

Sorry there aren't three of them and green!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:30 | 1460555 Manthong
Manthong's picture

Well, these aren't green, but they are from Mars...

Maybe we'll get some from Fukushima.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:46 | 1460886 WilliamShatner
WilliamShatner's picture

That's ok, I'll do anything with tits and a vag.

I'm not a picky man.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:09 | 1460469 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

CD, are you trying to make RoboTrader jealous?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:16 | 1460485 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

I'm afraid it all comes naturally. I just don't try to hide the fact that I'm an idiot. :)

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:36 | 1460843 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

but you are such a LOVEABLE idiot! such a high caliber idiot.. and idiot we all could strive to be more like! for the betterment of each other!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:57 | 1460920 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

We Americans always fall in love with our idiots. It helps kill the pain of our crushing mediocrity and abject stupidity.

What doesn't kill us just makes us even more insane.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 13:59 | 1460226 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Bank run!
Imminent sign of collapse:

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:14 | 1460283 Josh Randall
Josh Randall's picture

+5000 laughs - FORMS for free rent vouchers cause people to step over their own mothers to get one - although they would have to wait 2 years in some cases to receive anything, and agai it was just a form to apply:

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:20 | 1460308 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

The same behaviour will be observed VERY SOON when vouchers to apply for a free bag of chips and a can of soda are distributed amongst the desperate sheeple.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:02 | 1460450 r101958
r101958's picture

Yes, and this stands in stark contrast to the way people were in the 30's. Or, for another comparison, Japan this spring.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:57 | 1460675 trav7777
trav7777's picture

idiot.  Take a look at the vouchers stampedes.

Then take a look at the people in the 30s.

Notice any GLARING differences?  Like that jump right out at you?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:55 | 1460665 trav7777
trav7777's picture

blacks again?  Bcuz that's who it was in Atlanta for the same vouchers

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:17 | 1460290 bill1102inf
bill1102inf's picture

millions of people who should never have been born in america.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:25 | 1460327 duo
duo's picture

exactly.  It was fine when they stayed on the reservation, but now the 3rd generation (maybe the 4th if you're a great-grandmother at 40) of the Great Society will be distributed amongst society by court order.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 21:33 | 1461431 sun tzu
sun tzu's picture

Tha'ts what happened in my old neighborhood when a Carter appointed federal judge ruled that the city had to build section 8 housing in all the decent neighborhoods. It went from thriving to a ghetto hellhole full of drug dealers and prostitutes. Yep, getting them out of the ghetto really changed their attitudes

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:25 | 1460328 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

Unless you are a proud member of the Cherokee, Cree, Apache, Hopi, Mohican, Blackfoot, Cheyenne, Chinook, Crow, Navajo, Seminole or any other free sovereign American Indian Nation, that would include you.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:30 | 1460349 PierreLegrand
PierreLegrand's picture sure about that? Who built these?


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:56 | 1460424 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

Who built these?

The Irish, obviously.


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:01 | 1460449 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

Is that a penis? Or are the ancients flipping us off for time immemorial??

They must have had inadequate Wanker Timmays and Weiners even back then...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:26 | 1460538 TaxSlave
TaxSlave's picture

That's not a phallus.  It was placed there by aborigines in the coprophiliac era.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:49 | 1460638 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Looks to be about the same size dick as the Fed is using on us right about now.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:32 | 1460830 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

....proof again that aliens visited earth and left us with some of their scientific advances....unfortunately their stone dildos were not sized correctly.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 20:54 | 1461376 PierreLegrand
PierreLegrand's picture

There is significant evidence that Europeans were here before the indians...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 20:53 | 1461383 PierreLegrand
PierreLegrand's picture

Nah I was more thinking of this one...

One possibility is the ancient Greek Mycenaeans who buried their nobles in beehive tombs called tholoi, large circular burial chambers with a high vaulted roof. This is a possible influence, especially since the pre–classical Greeks were contemporary with the Phoenicians who may have lived at America's Stonehenge, a location we will examine later. As for the beehive chambers of New England, like nowhere else in the world, they closely resemble smaller structures found around the islands of northern Europe. The New England chambers are dead ringers for those built by the Culdee Monks of Scotland, England, and Ireland who adopted the building style from their Celtic ancestry.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:35 | 1460365 Dreadker
Dreadker's picture

+1 from my wife - she's full blood Chickasaw - Spartans of the south ;-)

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:52 | 1460413 WonderDawg
WonderDawg's picture

Where'd you meet her? I'm looking for a squaw myself. She have any sisters? Pics?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:14 | 1460486 Dreadker
Dreadker's picture

I met her serving in the military - she calls me her souvenir from the UK lol

She has a sister but she wouldn't be interested... she's a lesbian ;-)



Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:34 | 1460565 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

Is her name "Dances With Beavers?"

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:12 | 1460753 WonderDawg
WonderDawg's picture

Dang, just my luck. The good ones are always lesbians haha.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:25 | 1460533 Blano
Blano's picture

The US won, they lost.  Deal with it.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:24 | 1460321 Strider52
Strider52's picture

Shit, meet Fan.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:38 | 1460581 upWising
upWising's picture

Decorum, please:

Feces, meet whirling blades.

Excrement, meet climate control.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 13:58 | 1460233 DCFusor
DCFusor's picture

Sounds like I should have held my short open longer.  Hmmm.  I kinda figured that if it went down much more, there'd be some more explicit government intervention in this "systemically important" company, right hand of satan that they are notwithstanding.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:00 | 1460240 HEHEHE
HEHEHE's picture

I still believe Paulson's Bank of America investment was a quid pro quo to keep the Feds from going after him on that Goldman deal. 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:10 | 1460269 Long Duck Dong
Long Duck Dong's picture

and the govt owed B of A for buying that pile of crap Countrywide.  Back scratching all the way to 0.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:15 | 1460285 dark pools of soros
dark pools of soros's picture

and Merrill too...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:17 | 1460294 treemagnet
treemagnet's picture

Merrill.....those fuckers have a special place in hell waiting for them.  Bad personal experience.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:28 | 1460337 Lionhead
Lionhead's picture

I think Armstrong is right; Paulson is the next sucker at the poker table & TPTB over him are going to take his stack of chips.

Careful John P. the sharks are eyeing you...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:02 | 1460248 ads56
ads56's picture

This bank is zombie bank. It will go bankrupt. You have been warned.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:04 | 1460458 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

Zombies: Night of the Living Banksters

Sheriff's advice:

"Well, there's no problem. If you have a gun, shoot 'em in the head. That's a sure way to kill 'em. If you don't, get yourself a club or a torch. Beat 'em or burn 'em. They go up pretty easy."

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:02 | 1460249 Internet Tough Guy
Internet Tough Guy's picture

They're all wasted!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:54 | 1460421 caerus
caerus's picture

Baba O'Riley...cue the townshend windmill power chord!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:34 | 1460567 Bay of Pigs
Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:03 | 1460251 The Axe
The Axe's picture

Banks want to rollover      koodos to ZH..Tyler you call the fake-out in Citibank...thx

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:03 | 1460252 mt paul
mt paul's picture

gold, silver

high of the day...

lot of room to run..

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:09 | 1460266 SumSUN
SumSUN's picture

JPM is getting close to falling below spot silver again.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:09 | 1460267 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture


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Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:37 | 1460369 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Hey jerkoff stop with your posts to me about 'how I dont get it' and 'Im the problem'....go back and review Im the one telling all those people there is NO difference! 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:43 | 1460390 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

Thats not true! the Republicans are God's Chosen.. like the Jews!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:37 | 1460851 I Am The Unknow...
I Am The Unknown Comic's picture

I guess I'll have to visit this page again later to check your junks and get a figure on just how many Democrats and Jews there are actually hanging around ZH... :>)

...oh, and no I didn't junk you JW

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:43 | 1460880 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

now that made me giggle! Thank You and God Bless You and Yours for bringing some laughter into the World! there is enough of the other floating around and around, waiting to be sucked down the drain I guess!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:44 | 1460394 Rick64
Rick64's picture

Wow BOA seems very nonpartisan.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:49 | 1460407 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

They want to own everyone! Party Affiliation is not important! as long as everyone is on the payroll! LULZ!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:25 | 1460531 fuu
fuu's picture

Jesus christ just post the link douche.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:41 | 1460589 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

the link does not communicate the shear volume of Lobby Dollars being thrown at the Lobby Whores! Nor does a link allow a person to (in 3 to5 seconds) Grasp the totality of the purchasing power of their Tax Dollars.. if "We the People" are Not paying for Bonuses then "We the People" are paying to bribe / payoff / lobby the very elected Lobby Whores that are supposed to save us from these thieves!


for every $1 dollar we pay a Congress Person or Senator.. the Lobby gives them $4 dollars.. often from the 0% FED Window or Subsidies that "We the People" either back stop or pay for outright.


so, as for me being a douche' and providing information that is sourced and sited for anyone at any part of the learning curve.. verse your one line of nothing? well you are not even a douche' and my pointing out your behavior is not the determiningfactor in your usefulness to your fellow Americans. so feel free to kill yourself and all those ignorant lil drains on society that you have sired as well.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:57 | 1460674 fuu
fuu's picture

Post links and take your meds.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:40 | 1460860 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

I will of course do exactly as you command.. to bad you could not be standing in front of me while running that pretty lil mouth of yours.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 17:27 | 1460989 fuu
fuu's picture

Come on up to my neck of the woods and I will run my mouth in your face.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 19:32 | 1461210 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

i will burn your woods down, in total.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:00 | 1460689 trav7777
trav7777's picture

JFC, you fuckin idiot, NOBODY wants to scroll past your fucking 500 lines of bullshit!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:41 | 1460868 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

Travis, I am not your fat ugly wife.. I dont care what you want to do with your lil dick. but hey! better luck next time!!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:11 | 1460273 monopoly
monopoly's picture

Been watching BAC, and now going back to 6 from a while back. Wonder what caused that. Hmmmm.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:13 | 1460274 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

I am so glad I stayed in my FAZ all along. 

1) Banks only made temp profits when they could package up BS loans in CDOs and sell them off 

2) There is an unprecedented amount of homes that are not foreclosed upon and given grace periods to prevent downward pressure on home prices

3) Record low mortgage rates have still led to a decline in home prices

4) Banks have been pretending for 3 years now that if they just close their eyes the magic Fed and their 0% rates will return to housing price to bubble false prices that were only possible from sign on loans.

5) The jobs are exiting America because we make nothing of value therefore there are no products to sell to other nations and less jobs to service debt and mortgages.

6) We have a nation with 20% of the citizenry on foodstamps which equates to that many people not purchasing homes

7) The cost of food and energy is ballistic because of printing lowering the amount of money which can be used for both discretionary and mortgage servicing

8) All of these trading desks can only make profits when they are squeezing short interest per the Chairmans mandate and are not permitted to sell their holdings because any volume will cause the HFT's to piss their pants and enter into sellmargeddon

  At the end of the day all of these profits were reliant upon attempts to turn paper into gold..instead we have record debt and eventually nations reliant upon us such as China to export our paper of value will not be able to "invest" in our Treasuries at the same rate since the American broke zombies no longer have the ability with or without subsidies from govt to consume at record levels. 

China only has a value as a nation as long as they can export to us..what happens when the U.S. demand slowly decreases. There is no recycled printed paper to send back to the factory of the world and their slave labor.

    All they have left is printing, lying, accounting gimmicks and the structural issue of attempting to create capital with printed paper backed no longer with a days work but with future production is going to create events the status quo cannot contain and when that day occurs all of these held paper stocks with artificial HFT induced false pricing will be unloaded on the markets and we will be well below S&P 666.

   Fake economy and fake prices in stocks which are much like a ponzi reliant upon nobody cashing out for EVER. And if the Fed launched more paper printing all that is needed is to buy metals which allows you to short the market without shorting it. You can only confuse the free market for so long but eventually human nature is applied to economics and life and survival finds a way. 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:15 | 1460288 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

It's a Ponzi off day for sure . 

Biflation will kill the US middle class. 

A global tsunami of revolt will engulf the developed world

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:19 | 1460299 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

 I am still amazed that the financial terrorists did not unleash a 700 point Dow drop to create the fear or illusion to raise the debt ceiling. Maybe on Monday. 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:24 | 1460324 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Since the construct know as "The Market" functions only as a prediction of further Fed largesse, they are still betting on a debt ceiling hike and QE3. Don't forget the billions still incoming from QE lite. So they're playing it cool.

TPTB are beginning to get nervous and don't want to spark off a revolution 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:24 | 1460529 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture as we all know we have a global financial market that is always baking in unending ZIRP, QE and military methods to deal with upheaval. Factor in the need to release oil reserves, hike margins and centrally plan in conjunction all regulations that oppose the cartels and laws passed that support we have what Tyler pointed out previously.

  "Markets Love Totalitarianism" since it is predictable. Chaos Theory is the way to profit. Short term we may be on the losing end but inevitably human nature will reward the prudent.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:49 | 1460403 Rick64
Rick64's picture

 It will have to be officially voted down first for a drop like that. IMO   Remember TARP was not passed the first time.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:32 | 1460353 Tuco Benedicto ...
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez's picture

What's "bi"flation?  Is that inflation that occurs in San Francisco?



Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:17 | 1460498 Bananamerican
Bananamerican's picture


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:26 | 1460332 decon
decon's picture

I'm with you John!  The juice I've been squeezing out of FAZ periodically over the last week is soooo sweet.  I wish when the banks run out of that juice I could grind em up and feed em to my chickens!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:18 | 1460502 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

I added a tad more @ $39.00. Sure I am still down about 50% but I am young and have been in FAZ for 2 years+.I have much time so when that compounding kicks in similar with AQG going from 40-320 I will be a happy camper and all that "decay" can kick rocks.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:03 | 1460454 Spaceman Spiff
Spaceman Spiff's picture

"I am so glad I stayed in my FAZ all along. "


Been a painful run, huh?   If not for fed manipulation, government bailouts, and legalized accounting fraud, you'd be sitting on a pile of money.   free markets died in 2009.

Feel your pain.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:11 | 1460276 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

Top U.S. Lobbying Banks Got Biggest Bailouts


1.    [PDF]

A Fistful of Dollars:Lobbying and the Financial Crisis; Financial ...

File Format: PDF/Adobe Acrobat - View as HTML
A Fistful of Dollars: Lobbying and the Financial Crisis by. Deniz Igan ...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:24 | 1460323 SoNH80
SoNH80's picture

"We have the best Congress money can buy."  - Will Rogers

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:11 | 1460277 Quantum Nucleonics
Quantum Nucleonics's picture

Moynihan to Geithner: "We need stress tests, damnit, we need stress tests!!!

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:14 | 1460284 So Sue Me
So Sue Me's picture

Bank of America is being set up to be the "bad bank."  All other banks have already offloaded  all of their worthless paper to BAC.  Now, BAC will be allowed to "fail" in an orderly manner, with govt backstops, naturally.  Perp walks?  Maybe.  Look for some names to be named.  Low lever nobody's anyway.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:19 | 1460301 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

You may be surprised how strong the vested interests are. They can't turn BAC into a "bad bank" else all the other interconnected pieces of the Ponzi would collapse. They can only expand the Fed balance sheet further or resort to expanding the usual lying, cheating and hiding through accounting tricks. 

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:30 | 1460350 Tuco Benedicto ...
Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez's picture

Hey gang, B of A is part owner of the privately held Federal Reserve.  Keep that in mind.


Tuco Benedicto Pacifico Juan Maria Ramirez

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:22 | 1460312 duo
duo's picture

I guess I had better wait to pay off my mortgage with BAC.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:19 | 1460297 Frank N. Beans
Frank N. Beans's picture

Tyler, wonderful title to this article. 



Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:20 | 1460298 virgilcaine
virgilcaine's picture

Agree so sue me , it's a goner.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:19 | 1460300 lieutenantjohnchard
lieutenantjohnchard's picture

jpm $39.67 silver $39.17

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:20 | 1460305 The Axe
The Axe's picture

Anybody know whats happening to GreenHill??????   another sick financial

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:20 | 1460306 SAME AS IT EVER WAS

How about Jim "ass clown" Cramers Citi Bank $12.00 by 2012 prediction last summer. I wish somebody would use him and the rest of the stock recommmending theives as shark chum. Besides laws and regulations being created by(elected mobsters) as a proxy to rob and steal, the "equity markets" are the next best thing to absolutly plunder peoples wealth, all without a single act of violence or effort for that matter.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:12 | 1460477 Libertarians fo...
Libertarians for Prosperity's picture

One of the worst C calls ever was Karen Finerman on Fast Money in April 2008. 

Dylan Ratigan gave her an entire 10 min (or so) segment to state her thesis on why C was a buy at ~$24.  This wasn't just a off-handed comment about C, it was an entire segment devoted to her and her analysis.  Of all the stocks to pick....LOL.  

Over the next 12 months, it collapsed to $1.  Not only was she steering retail investors into a totally insolvent banking system, she directed them into the single WORST bank of them all.  I don't think there was a single week where that trade was profitable.  One really must wonder how much money CNBC (and Fast Money in particular) have cost retail investors over the past several years.  This, among a thousand other careless trade recommendations on Fast Money, makes Dylan Ratigan's self-righteous, feigned outrage about Wall Street corruption all the more laughable. 


Worst ever.


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:21 | 1460309 Temporalist
Temporalist's picture
Credit Suisse Says It’s a Target of U.S. Justice Department Investigation

Credit Suisse Group AG (CSGN), the second- biggest Swiss bank, is a target of a criminal investigation by the Department of Justice over former cross-border private banking services to U.S. customers.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:22 | 1460313 Mercury
Mercury's picture

Well, someone has to do it:

Watch the Ox play that bass like a Bach organ...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:29 | 1460345 blobbus
blobbus's picture

Is this the big american bank that Jim Rogers is shorting?


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:02 | 1460452 caerus
caerus's picture

maybe...he almost gave up the name on cnbs but then said he couldnt cuz he had "too many friends who work there"

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:39 | 1460367 AlaricBalth
AlaricBalth's picture

BAC Market Cap = $100 billion

Cash and Equivalents (9/30/10) = $629 billion

Cash and Equivalents (3/31/11) = $564 billion

Cash and Equivalents (now) = $331 billion

Seems like BAC is burning through cash but cannot find where it is going from quick analysis of the Q's and other relevant filings (FDIC, et al).

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:43 | 1460603 JW n FL
JW n FL's picture

Look! Lobbying and Bonus Monies take a LOT! out of the cash on hand column! be a Prince and try to hold that down would ya! the Sheep are already restless!


FANTASTIC POST!! More Please!!



Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:37 | 1460368 theopco
theopco's picture

couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of assholes

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:38 | 1460374 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Darn it, and it was only a couple hours ago Robo was writing about how great B of A was trading today.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:41 | 1460386 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

is this blood?  did someone get a counterparty paper-cut? 

i'll take Banking for $400, ok, alex?

the answer is:  we needed a bad bank anyhow

ok:  what is, how tf did BAC lose its TBTF status?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:42 | 1460389 There is No Spoon
There is No Spoon's picture

and GM < 30 again

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:44 | 1460396 caerus
caerus's picture

benjamin button?  now that is funny...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:52 | 1460410 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

BAC bot Countrywide for $4B (Jan 2008). To date that purchase has cost them $30B.

Brilliant. Fucking Brilliant.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:08 | 1460465 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Makes perfect sense in the world of global high finance.

It's only us Ponzi math challenged peons who actually think 2 + 2 = 4 and not $30B that are gaging on this Countywide purchase. I didn't see anyone lose their job over it.


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:27 | 1460541 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

Nah, if you are a CEO and screw up (even fraudulently) you don't lose your job, you get bought out and a golden handshake/parachute.

Mozillo made about $500m during his time as CEO of Countrywide. His net worth is around $600m.

Of course he had to pay that SEC fine of what $67.5M (of course he avoided acknowledging any wrongdoing) Countrywide (BAC) will pay $20 million of the $67.5 million penalty because of an indemnification agreement that was part of Mozillo's employment contract.

In February 2011, the U.S. dropped its criminal investigation into the facts behind that civil settlement.

Again Fucking Brilliant.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:42 | 1460594 Bay of Pigs
Bay of Pigs's picture

They have to keep Pandora's Box tightly shut.

I'm sure Mozillo knows full well where the bodies are buried.


Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:48 | 1460890 karzai_luver
karzai_luver's picture

I have to humbly proclaim that at the time it looked like a shotgun

(bazooka) marriage and it smelled and stinks to this day.

Nothing like paying "good money" for a bunch of empty boxes that smelled like  shit.

Easy to see at the time it was a freakin neutron bomb.




Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:52 | 1460412 Piranhanoia
Piranhanoia's picture

Morgue stock getting closer to moving below silver for the last time.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 14:53 | 1460419 John Law Lives
John Law Lives's picture

<<<   At least that way the bank will now only hit but triple John Paulson's $30 price target by the end of 2011.   >>>

I don't relish seeing other people lose money, but I don't feel sorry seeing someone like John Paulson take a bath.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:08 | 1460464 r101958
r101958's picture

BAC and Citi may be sacrificed so the other big 2 can continue to rape everyone. The inevitable consolidation. So, in the next phase, BAC may be taken over by Goldman and Citi by JPM (or vice-versa). Who knows?

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:44 | 1460604 Bananamerican
Bananamerican's picture

this has been prophesied for over 3 years now...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:16 | 1460494 Problem Is
Problem Is's picture

BAC ... Bitch of Amerika...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:29 | 1460550 Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward's picture

Sheesh, just get it over with and do a 1 for 100 reverse split.  Saves having do the 1 for 10 again in a few years time.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 15:41 | 1460591 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

Banks and real estae...two losers for the foreseeable future.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:39 | 1460858 rosiescenario
rosiescenario's picture

....this will attract the shorts like flies to a steaming turd...

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 16:52 | 1460907 AldousHuxley
AldousHuxley's picture

JP Morgan wants to be the top bank again.
Morgan Stanley is JPMorgan's cousin.
Goldman is just a private extension of the Treasury...and Buffett's chosen one.
Wells Fargo is also chosen by Buffett.
Citi is Goldman's retail. Same crooks, revolving door. After Saudi prince ditched it, crooks saved it. They let some Indian run it. India is a potential future dollar buyer...gotta look accomodating.

Who else is left?

Bank of America the scapegoat. After Lehman, there needed to be one more bank to take out the trash. They rolled Merrill and Countrywide dump into BAC and they are going to have BAC take the fall. Let North Carolina take it to save New York banksters.

BAC shareholders will take it.

Thanks for playing.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 18:03 | 1461067 Spaceman Spiff
Spaceman Spiff's picture

Charlotte took a pretty big hit when Wachovia went bust.    BAC falling might plunge the area into detroit status.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 23:41 | 1461629 bakken
bakken's picture

No Way.  Gubmint will do some corrupted magic to save BAC, shares will hit $18 by April 2012.  But I'll go 73/4 put before that.

Fri, 07/15/2011 - 23:42 | 1461630 bakken
bakken's picture

<:>  DBL

Sun, 07/17/2011 - 03:50 | 1463307 mophead
mophead's picture

bac will go to zero.

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