Guest Post: FBI Raids Chuck E. Cheese For “Undermining U.S. Currency”

Tyler Durden's picture

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Dr. Kenneth Noisewater's picture

What, no Marlboro bucks?


Holodomor2012's picture

I'll tell you what they won't touch, and I shouldn't need to tell you why.

bigdumbnugly's picture

so what will the punishment be if convicted?

being confined to a seat in chuck e cheese during peak hours?

its stiff punishment like this that we need if we truly don't want repeat offenders.

detersbb's picture

The Parkers Brothers might want to leave the country (Monopoly) before they get busted too.

Fish Gone Bad's picture

The article was meant to be humor. 

Anonymouse's picture

Thanks so much for clarifying that.  Perhaps fish isn't brain food after all.

MarketTruth's picture

Las Vegas to be CLOSED DOWN due top their illegal use of tokens and chips that claim to represent currency. As the WORLD"S LARGEST counterfeiting ring, the casinos in Las Vegas have clearly violated USA laws and must be shut down immediately.

OldPhart's picture

There is hope.  Perhaps soon targeted would be those sponsoring such evil, unamerican venues like subways and buses.

Thisson's picture

I logged in just to junk you, bigot.

Mont Bleu's picture

Same here. A shame that this website is beginning to attract racist white trash extremists bc of their blind hatred for the US gov. The criticisims raised here are rational and these free-riders try to hijack it to their own agenda

Holodomor2012's picture

Happy Passover to those who junked me.  You don't suppose the famine in Canaan was caused by monetary failure do you?  I mean that's why you moved to Egypt right?  Anyways, enjoy your matzah.

chumbawamba's picture

Hahaha!  You get 20 points today, my friend: 10 for each dim-witted Jewish supremacist that responded to you.

Watch this, though: I'm about to score at least 30.

I am Chumbawamba.

muckraker's picture

This is also satire, right? Caricature of a rabid anti-Semite...funny stuff.

Paul Bogdanich's picture

You have got to be kidding me.  This is a political statements meant to take the air out of the sails of Americans accumulating physical gold.  A Krugerand would still be legal to hold as it is a foreign currency it's just that you can't buy anything with it until you convert it into Benny Bucks.  There goes the value of your gold as a barter currency.  All they have to do now is pass a regulation (wouldn't even involve the congress just a regulation under the authority of the Secretary) that you need to be licensed to buy sell or trade delivery bars or ingots.  I have said for ages that the main risk to the price of gold was political rather than economic.  There you have it.  

Pool Shark's picture



They made Marijuana, cocaine and methampetamine illegal, and the prices of all of them have been falling ever since;... what's that?... black market?... prices artificially high?...

Ooops. Nevermind.


Bolweevil's picture

I'm still confused about the grams ounces kilos pounds thing?

Pool Shark's picture


It's all the fault of those bloody Brits.

They stick us with this stupid "English System" of weights and measures (bushels? pecks? quarts? pints?), and then they go metric like the rest of the civilized world...


primalplasma's picture

What you do is you hold your precious metals and convert them to a sound fiat currency when the right time comes. I have physical gold and silver but I never expected to actually use it for bartering.

Hacked Economy's picture

Possibly...there may or may not ever be a true [classic] bartering system in which silver/gold coins are used as currency.  But I have SAEs and pre-1965s anyway, and in worst case, they're acting as a great inflation hedge, even if only to be "converted" at some later date per your suggestion.

But I also have original 1980s-era Disney Dollars and Chuck E. Cheese tokens from my childhood.  They might come in handy, too.

Ya never know...  ;-)

XitSam's picture

"sound fiat currency"  Candidate for oxymoron of the year.

Boxed Merlot's picture

I have said for ages that the main risk to the price of gold was political rather than economic...


The main risk to the price of anything is political. 

One of the main reasons for the value of Ag and AU is the policies regulating the mining, refining and possession of the end product, but control of the hole in the ground where the stuff originates from.


I read somewhere recently someone suggesting hardrock mines being a great place to store spent fuel rods.  Must've been a fed/irs/bis recommendation.

MrSteve's picture

Salt mines are the right place for long time, millenia range, storage of nuke waste. The existing salt beds (such as near Syracuse, NY) have been geologically stable for many 100 millions of years. The Forces of NIMBY are strong and organized against such practical ideas though. Maybe the current irradiation of the biosphere will convince people that the over stuffed pools of spent fuel rods need better, safer long term storage than the current open dump approach.

Trundle's picture

The power of the state condenses its criminality by the promulgation of obtuse and confusing statutes enforced by selective prosecution.

OldTrooper's picture

you can't buy anything with it until you convert it into Benny Bucks.

Think so?  I've got an old Ford Ranger I'll sell you for 7/10ths of an ounce of gold.  Gold and silver doesn't spend worth a shit a WalMart - but it's accepted at my place.

outamyeffinway's picture

Nice! I'll be selling my power washer this spring for about 3 oz's of silver. Used to be about 8 or 9. Inflation is killing me!!!

OldPhart's picture


Took me four paragraphs to realize this was a parody.  Everything I've read lately in the news made this just another example of the idiots working in government at all levels.  It's becoming hard to tell truth from fiction in what the government and media does.

Hacked Economy's picture

Me too.  Great article...makes you *wonder* at the beginning, 'cuz who knows what the Feds will consider as contraband currency nowadays.

I'm keeping my shells and beads buried with my gold.

outamyeffinway's picture

I had to quickly scroll to the bottom as my blood pressure was rising to quickly!'s picture

It's becoming hard to tell truth from fiction in what the government and media does.


The following is true:

Baby Squirrel Gets Pepper-Sprayed By Cop - Video

Creepy Lurker's picture

Don't forget the Linden Dollars. LOL

hardmedicine's picture

really, that was the biggest laugh out loud moment I have had in about a month.!  SERIOUS.  I can't even watch Stephen Colbert and John Stewart anymore (used to be my comic relief) because they too have been infiltrated by Communists Club of Rome.  It's been about 2 years now since they were taken over.  'So sad.  But this made my terrible lousy day just a little easier to bear

aVian's picture

sad humor it possible to laugh out loud and shit my pants at the same time?

Clamdigger's picture

I have found that if you laugh really, really hard, it becomes somewhat more likely to happen spontaneously.

OldPhart's picture

I have found that successive candles on the cake soon make hard laughter unnecessary

G-R-U-N-T's picture

LOL...."Heinrich Himmler of the FBI" how fitting!


weinerdog43's picture

Now you've done it.  Probably have appeared on some sort of watch list.

Bicycle Repairman's picture

There was a president on that Chucky Cheese token.  I'm not sure which one, but he seemed familiar.

Dugald's picture

Pity the Goon Show is no more, this would be great script material......

celticgold's picture

 the juxtaposition of whatsernames underwear and cheese , is just too much

Montgomery Burns's picture

All parents will agree that chuck e cheese should be shut down and the management jailed. Oh, and their pizza sucks also!

Sudden Debt's picture

You forget 1 industry that thrives on tokens!!



I even have a silver chips collection from vegas.





MrSteve's picture

Ever come across the "love tokens" from the Swayback Ranch, etc?

Doubleguns's picture

Better hide your silver rounds. They will be raiding every house in America next to get your silver rounds. You damn counterfeiters best be hiding now!!!

Now we know how they will confiscate your silver.  

Sudden Debt's picture

wearing a silver piercing this summer might really become a dangerous enterprise...


Commander Cody's picture

Fascist police state strikes again!

Commander Cody's picture

Parody?  Do not obfuscate.  I know for a fact that the story is true and the names have been changed to protect the innocent.