Guest Post: Germany Looks To Justin Bieber To Solve The Crisis

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Mon, 05/23/2011 - 15:56 | 1302845 emsolý
emsolý's picture

Greece just needs somebody to love

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:56 | 1303010 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

Juncker's new look may be taking this whole appeal to the youth movement just a little too far...


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:02 | 1302851 williambanzai7
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And Merkel is literally blaming Fukushima today. What a quack.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:17 | 1303204 knukles
knukles's picture

Don't forget the weather.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 19:18 | 1303387 andybev01
andybev01's picture

...and volcanoes. Those asholes.

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 23:18 | 1307780 silberblick
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Click below to see a visual graph of Bankster's dirty needs arranged according to Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs:

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:01 | 1302857 Saxxon
Saxxon's picture

I'm just watching the descent with popcorn.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:21 | 1303221 Imminent Crucible
Imminent Crucible's picture

Descent was a pretty good game, but this version sucks.  Here's the critical quote:

"voters voiced their utter disgust with the current government’s handling of the economy."

I have something unpleasant to tell the voters: You are stupid to expect the government to manage the economy.  Or anything else.  Governments don't manage. They steal and redistribute. You should have left the economy and the currency and interest rates to take care of themselves. "Everything government touches turns to crap"--Ringo Starr

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:02 | 1302865 LFMayor
LFMayor's picture

I say go heavier on pissing the Krauts off.  That worked really good last time.  Those tall boots will be out and marching again, real soon.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:24 | 1302931 InconvenientCou...
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They'll need a good 5-10 years to reflate the military complex. The clock starts ticking the day after they abandon the EU.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:34 | 1302953 Nicholaz
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Not necessary.  This time Germany will just buy the rest of europe or seize it as collateral for bailout lending.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:49 | 1302998 Things that go bump
Things that go bump's picture

Thereby accomplishing all of their objectives and finally getting to rule the world, yay!

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:55 | 1303314 longorshort
longorshort's picture

I know you, you were that looser buying that kiss dolly in Spencers.

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 01:31 | 1304193 Things that go bump
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Tue, 05/24/2011 - 00:41 | 1304196 Things that go bump
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You, sir, are mistaken.  That was a Justin Bieber doll for my granddaughter's birthday.  

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:07 | 1302880 Jack Mehoff
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Meanwhile in America it's bussiness as usual.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:14 | 1302892 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

4 to 5 more weeks before the dollar goes down.


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:07 | 1302882 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

Get Lady Gaga to team up with Beiber, this deal just might have wheels!

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 17:30 | 1303090 MrSteve
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Way to roll with the tide, O German Shepard1. I imagine the capital ratios of the Landesbanks is probably over 100-1 by now. They could sure use some youthful energy to overcome all these obstacles to Paradise.

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 00:20 | 1304173 Keri at Bankste...
Keri at Bankster Report's picture

I think his name "SheepDog1" means that he carries (to protect the sheep).

Am I right, SheepDog?  (Don't answer!) :)

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:19 | 1303209 knukles
knukles's picture

Question:  Has there been any resolution as to whether GaGa is a guy/hermaphrodite/whatever and Beiber is gay?

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 21:55 | 1303864 nmewn
nmewn's picture

Yes, he was sent among the peeps to distract attention from his adams apple & yes Beiber is gay.

I am, however, operating under the assumption they are both Catholic repitilian shape shifters under the direction of Mossad.

And yes, I have been known to stir the pot ;-)

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:11 | 1302883 Sudden Debt
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Kids would vote to whatever party the parents say so in 50% of all cases.

The other once would vote the rebel side: Right wing.

Maybe 5% would vote left.


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:18 | 1302909 SheepDog-One
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NAH no 16 year old listens to their parents.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:18 | 1302916 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

Yes they do. The children of the revolution aren't born yet.

Today's kids are pretty mainstrean indoctrinated.

Mommy and Daddy pay the phone bills. They aren't rebels anymore.


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:33 | 1302950 Rick64
Rick64's picture

 I know that when I was 16 I knew everything so I know they will make the right choice.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:57 | 1303002 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

All I cared about when I was 16 was

1. if my girlfriend could sleep over. Preferably every day.

2. Alcohol.

3. My porn collection

4. Computer games.

5. Go out in the weekends.

6. My friends.

7. My dog.


So unless "politics" was a blond nude chick with a D cup. I didn't care about it.


And now that I'm 34, all remains the sames besides number 1.

I married version 53 of the girlfriend series so I don't have to ask her anymore to sleep over :)



Mon, 05/23/2011 - 17:02 | 1303032 unky
unky's picture

yes, i think thats the difference between europe in the U.S.  i think in germany only 8-10 years old are the justin bieber crowd. above that: alcohol and you named it.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 17:12 | 1303055 Rick64
Rick64's picture

 See you were perfectly capable at 16 of making the right choices.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:18 | 1303213 knukles
knukles's picture

Did you ever mix too much of #'s 2 and 3 and wind up with a #7 problem?

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 07:01 | 1304427 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

How do you mean?

That I'll try to lick my own balls?

I wish I could my friend... I wish I could...



Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:11 | 1302885 monopoly
monopoly's picture

This is all really very simple. We know the outcome. How long will they be able to rape the people before they say enough. Then, it gets interesting.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:17 | 1302907 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

I'm sorry to say 99% of the people still don't have a clue.

Most of the Europeans still enjoy the good life. All they know is that some of the news says other don't, and that only triggers their social helping sence that says: FUCK THOSE PEOPLE! WE DON'T SHARE!

And that's for example the only reasons why the true fins vote against Europe.

We're just not that social. We don't care about anybody else but ourselves.


Tue, 05/24/2011 - 05:05 | 1304384 Reptil
Reptil's picture

+1 My observation too.

In the Netherlands politician Geert Wilders said he'd not support sending any money to Greece. He was promptly attacked by Central Bank honcho (and 1st class manipulating scumbag) Nout Wellink. Who called him a "false prophet", and warned it'd cost the dutch economy dearly. Which is true since the banksters made the Netherlands (with it's lax tax laws, excellent infrastructure) their "hub". They're now (still) showering the population with little trinkets, life IS good over here, for nearly everyone. The real economy is doing fine.

All of that will end of course when the bankster either win, or lose.

I hope I'll be somewhere else then. Spain is nice I heard... ;-P It's like investing, this living thing. Hopping from iceberg to iceberg, and all of em are melting...

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 07:02 | 1304425 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

Hopping from iceberg to iceberg

And when these icebergs all melt, all the Netherlands problems are solved because all water levels will go up by a few meters.

Than my real estate will go up bigtime because all those dutch will try to migrate to Belgium, GOD HELP US IF THAT EVER WHERE TO HAPPEN, NAUW NAUW NAUW!!, but I'll make enough money with that to move to Toscany :)

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:15 | 1302890 emsolý
emsolý's picture

From the Reuters article:

The teens are not, however, expected to noticeably influence the election. There are only 10,000 eligible 16 and 17-year-old voters in the electorate of 500,000.

Presumably, most if not all of them still live with their parents; why would they vote much differently from their parents, they may even be influenced by them, given it's their first turn to vote.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:26 | 1302927 Nicholaz
Nicholaz's picture

I'm not getting the Justin Bieber part.  Young people in Germany are the least likely to vote for Merkel's party.  I mean, I'd understand if they were rising the voting age to ... let's say ... 65 or so, then the CDU would stand a chance, but not in the age group anywhere below thirty.

Besides, that regional government that allowed the voting with 16 is in the hands of Merkels opposing party since over fifty years.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:38 | 1302930 Dapper Dan
Dapper Dan's picture
How convenient to release this news after markets close, Sky News Newsdesk British Airways suspends all flights between London and Scotland tomorrow due to volcanic ash cloud. 12 minutes ago » Sky News Newsdesk AFP: Dutch airline KLM suspends six flights to northern Britain due to Iceland volcanic ash cloud. 20 minutes ago And now the Prez has to alter travel plans just like last year ain't that odd?

Ash from an Icelandic volcano in April 2010 grounded Air Force One and prevented Obama from flying to Poland to attend the funerals of Polish President Lech Kaczynski, his wife, and Polish officials who had died in a plane crash.


And when Obama visited his boyhood home of Indonesia in November 2010, Obama was forced to cut short his trip by eruptions from Indonesia’s Mount Merapi.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 17:32 | 1303101 MrSteve
MrSteve's picture

Verily, his Karma stinketh if every volcano on Earth doth seek to scorch his ass.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 18:23 | 1303227 knukles
knukles's picture

And he cut short his Copenhagen Climate Change 200 Airplane Grand Carbon Footprint and Pollution Tour due to weather/volcano conditions. 
Neither war nor pestilence shall keep our self anointed royalty from their self appointed rounds.

Tue, 05/24/2011 - 10:06 | 1304824 Diogenes
Diogenes's picture

Don't forget the earthquake and tsunami that hit Japan when he was in Brazil, for the love of God why can't he stay home?

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:28 | 1302936 PaulSchiffT
PaulSchiffT's picture

As long as the greeks understand they are getting sold out to the banks... there is hope for everyone who wants to sh*t on the banksters.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:28 | 1302937 Doyle Hargraves
Doyle Hargraves's picture

Gee between all the MBS and the Greek Bailout you would think that Deutsche Bank would have died years ago...oh yeah I forgot The Amazing Ben and his printing press keeps them flush with cash to avoid even the worst of meltdowns, The Fed's Fukushima moment is coming soon, I will be there laughing, PMs in hand and heavy firepower in tow.

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:28 | 1302939 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Touch the Bieber-monkey!  TOUCH IT!!!

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:31 | 1302954 Rick64
Rick64's picture


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 19:58 | 1303535 Hephasteus
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Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:33 | 1302949 PulauHantu29
PulauHantu29's picture

How can this guy be popular? Am I THAT out of touch?!

Mon, 05/23/2011 - 16:36 | 1302958 Nicholaz
Nicholaz's picture


Mon, 05/23/2011 - 17:11 | 1303040 unky
Mon, 05/23/2011 - 23:59 | 1304161 StychoKiller
StychoKiller's picture

The resemblance...sure that's not his sister?

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