Guest Post: The Ruling Elite Called

Tyler Durden's picture

Submitted by Jim Quinn of The Burning Platform

The Ruling Elite Called

I just got off the horn with the Ruling Elite. We had an
emergency conference call and to tell you the truth, they ain’t happy.
You little people are not responding the way you are supposed to. A
significant portion of you are not getting more optimistic because they
tell you to. Instead of just reading the headline on Bloomberg that
durable goods orders skyrocketed in June, you actually read the details
that said durable goods orders plunged. It is getting difficult for the
ruling elite to keep the masses sedated and dumbed down. These damn
bloggers, with their facts and critical thinking, are throwing a wrench
into the gears. Obama and his crack team are working round the clock to
lock down the internet, but it will take time. Not that they are
totally dissatisfied. They’ve been able to renovate their penthouses
and purchase new mansions in the Hamptons with the billions in bonuses
you supplied through TARP. The $1.2 trillion supplied by your children
and grandchildren to buy up toxic mortgages off their balances sheets
was a godsend. They will never call you suckers, to your face.

Their spirits were buoyed by the 2,600 pages DONK (Dodd/Frank)
financial reform bill. So many loopholes, so little time. Obama and his
crack team of Obamanistas in the White House, supported by their
mouthpieces in the mainstream media, have been able to easily
manipulate the non-thinking masses into believing this bill would have
stopped the last financial crash and will stop the next one. The
Ministry of Truth has been working overtime utilizing Federal Reserve
paid shill economists like Alan Blinder and Mark Zandi to perpetuate
the myth that the actions taken in the last 18 months have averted a
Depression, saved 8 million jobs, created a long-lasting recovery,
wiped out Swine Flu, and earned Paul Krugman a nobel prize in fiction.

This is where we have a problem. The worshippers of Keynes, that
rule the country, are pissed off at you. Don’t you realize that
government spending of your money, borrowed from the Chinese, with the
bill passed to your grandchildren, was supposed to reinvigorate your
animal spirits. They handed you other people’s money to buy cars and
homes and what do you do? You stop buying cars and homes as soon as
they stop paying you to buy cars and homes. You ungrateful bastards.
Bennie has been hugely successful at ruining the retirements of
millions of grandmothers by paying them .20% on their money market
accounts while forcing mortgage rates for 30 years down to 4.5%. And
still you don’t buy houses. Timmy has instructed Fannie Mae to make
home loans to anyone with a pulse who can make an X on a piece of
paper. No money down, no proof of income, no assets. Just like the good
old days. Still you don’t buy houses. What is wrong with you?

The criminal banking elite have more than bent over backwards to get
this economy humming. They have patiently stood by while you haven’t
made your mortgage payments for two years while still residing in the
house. They’ve pretended to go along with the brilliant HAMP (Home
Affordable Modification Program) plan, masterminded by the rocket
scientists in the White House. Just because virtually no one has been
able to qualify for the plan and the redefault rate is 75%, doesn’t
mean it hasn’t worked wonders for the economy. The awesome part of not
making people pay their mortgages is that they were able to make
payments on their credit cards. That allowed the mega elite banks to
pretend that consumers are flush and relieve their loan loss reserves
while not writing off the bad mortgages and reporting billions
in profits for the 2nd Quarter. It is good to be the ruling elite.

The ruling elite are letting you slide on your mortgages and you
have the gall to withdraw $20 billion from U.S. equity funds and not
buy into this fake stock rally. Don’t you realize that when the stock
market goes up, the economy follows? Everyone knows this. But, instead
you sit on the sidelines and refuse to invest in the stock market. The
super computers of the mega-banks are getting tired of trading with
each other and single-handedly making the stock market appear safe.
Just because the ruling elite have vaporized $10 trillion of your net
worth in the last two years, you hold a grudge? Remember the mantra
“Stocks For the Long Run” that the ruling elite burned into your brains
through CNBC and the rest of the shillstream media? Why are you so
suspicious of our advice. Ignore the fact that the S&P 500 today is
at the exact level it reached on March 24, 1998. They meant the really
really long term.  

Here is the message from the ruling elite to you ignorant masses: Debt got us into this mess and it sure as hell is going to get us out.
They have convinced the mainstream media that the reason the economy is
sputtering is because the average Joe is not doing their part. This
crazy concept of saving for a rainy day seems to be catching on. This
is very dangerous. Savings could lead to investment and long-term
stability. The ruling elite will have none of that foolishness. The
mainstream media is telling you that this new found austerity will push
us back into recession. The talking heads continue to pound away that
you have reduced your spending too much, when anyone with a calculator
and half a brain (Krugman doesn’t make the cut) can determine that the
decrease in consumer debt outstanding is completely the result of
write-offs by the mega elite banks. Consumers are living off their
credit cards at this point.

The military industrial complex continues to do the heavy lifting
for this economy. If they weren’t blowing up bridges, power plants and
orphanages in foreign countries and then rebuilding them at ten times
the expected cost, how would they possibly spend $895 billion per year.
It ain’t easy to waste that kind of money annually. Whenever some crazy
dude like Ron Paul questions the need to spend as much as the rest of
the world combined on the military, some potential terrorists are
captured in the nick of time and the threat level is raised to Orange
(thanks Tom Ridge). The “professional” journalists on the major
networks then do their part in this farce by spreading fear among the
general population. Rinse and repeat.

So, we now find ourselves at the edge of the abyss again. The ruling
elite have a great plan. It involves more debt, more stimulus, more
printing, more accounting fraud, more pain for the masses, and of
course more bonuses for Wall Street. If you, the little people, will
just follow this 10 step plan, the ruling elite will be just fine:

  1. Stocks are undervalued according to the same “experts” who told you
    they were undervalued in October 2007. Take out a loan and buy
    mega-banks stocks, commercial real estate developers, and bankrupt car
  2. General Motors, in a brilliant strategic coup, has bought 
    “subprime” auto loan company Americredit. What else does a
    government/union owned car company need? The fact that GMAC has lost
    $10 billion of taxpayer funds in the last year shouldn’t worry you
    about your investment in GM. If you can’t sell cars to people with no
    income, no job and no prospects for repaying the seven year 0% loan,
    who can you sell a car to. When the government pays Goldman Sachs
    millions to convince you to buy the stock of GM in its Fall IPO, ask no
    questions and just buy buy buy.
  3. Ignore the fact that Citicorp, Bank of America, and Wells Fargo
    would be declared insolvent if the FASB had not caved into threats from
    the Federal Reserve and Treasury. Just buy their stocks. Trust Wall
  4. Enough austerity already. You haven’t bought a new HDTV in six
    months. It’s like you’ve been living in a 3rd world country. If you
    have any equity left in your house, borrow against it and buy something
    big and glitzy. Make sure you show it off to your shallowest neighbors.
    They will go out and buy something bigger and glitzier on credit.
    Before you know it we have a recovery. Keynesianism 101.
  5. Stop frequenting financial blogs like Naked Capitalism, Credit
    Writedowns, Dollar Collapse, Market Oracle, 321Gold, Jesse’s Cafe
    Americain, Of Two Minds, Zero Hedge, Mike Shedlock, or Barry Ritholtz.
    These sites will just shower you with facts, analysis and truth. Watch
    CNBC, Fox, MSNBC and the other corporate media to get the ruling elite
    approved view of the world.
  6. If you are currently renting or living in your mother’s basement,
    have no job, no savings and no prospects, Fannie Mae wants to put you
    in your very own house. Mortgage payments are optional. The 50% of
    Americans that pay taxes will gladly fund your new abode.
  7. If you are approaching the 99th week of unemployment, have no fear.
    The ruling elite will use the MSM to run hundreds of sob stories about
    only two years on the dole being immoral and cruel. The White House
    will present a study from “impartial” economists that proves that
    extending unemployment benefits to 156 weeks will create or save 3
    million jobs.
  8. The stress of this recession has been too much. You need to whip
    out that credit card and book a trip to Disney World or Dollywood.
    Worry about funding that 401k sometime in the future.
  9. Unquestioningly accept the fact that Iran is an imminent threat to
    your safety and liberty. Support the obliteration of this evil nation
    based upon information provided by the CIA (WMD slamdunk) and the
  10. Lastly, call your Congressman and tell them to extend the tax cuts
    for the rich. As you have probably concluded, the ruling elite are
    rich. They don’t like paying taxes. That is why they employ thousand of
    tax lawyers. Since the expiration of the Bush tax cuts will hurt the
    ruling elite the most, a full court press of disinformation is in order.

The ruling elite expect you to comply without question. Have they ever led you astray before?







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nuinut's picture

11. Should you be stupid enough to waste any money on gold (heaven help you), at least don't be so silly as to take possession of it. Your local bank can store it on your behalf, with a level of security you cannot get elsewhere;)

Light shed on BIS gold swaps 

July 29, 2010 4:32 PM 

Moneygrove's picture

It`s Joe Lieberman that wants to close the internets !!  ha ha bush joke !! Remember liebermen starts with a Lie !!!!!!!! he`s a nazi !!!!!!!!!!

Young's picture

A nazi jew? That's a new one.

Tense INDIAN's picture

Nothing new........Hitler himself had Jewish blood....Rothschild to be precise.

Hitlers grandmother Anna Shickgrubber ( cant spell correctly)  was a maid in the Rothschild Mansion in Vienna...when she became pregnant with Rothschilds son.....and Alois Hitler,  Hitlers Father was born ....there u go ...all these so called leaders are just placed by the Unseen hand behind.  

Bringin It's picture

Interesting ... Have you seen this?

When going to vote, he held up his Iranian ID over his head - looks like an internal passport, and a picture was taken of the openned document.

pros's picture

Some have said that Ahmadinejad is Mossad double-agent to be well-rewarded after his assignment to provide cover for attack on Iran is successfully completed--

this seems far-fetched to me.

IBelieveInMagic's picture

Tyler, this populistic rant Guest Posts are getting tiresome. Doesn't add any new insights plus they lack your acerbic wit - not worthy of space on ZH. 

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Everybody was DYIN' to know what you think...Thanks for that.

thisandthat's picture

Some have also said Golda Meir was a KGB double-agent.

Ahmadinejad isn't anti-Jew, he's anti-Zionism - that's different - and isn't alone, either:



Bringin It's picture

Ahmadinejad isn't anti-Jew, he's anti-Zionism - that's different

I agree.  My purpose in posting the link is that he appearently was born a Jew.   Which is interesting.

Bringin It's picture

You should know that Wiki-anything that touches upon anything related to zionist issues is highly suspect.  Just look at how 'religiously' the Zinos patrol the blogo-sphere.  You think they're going to leave the Wiki-world out of their sphere of influence?

Look into population genetics on Wiki if you want entertainment and confirmation.

thisandthat's picture

Not a doubt about that - doesn't make it necessarily wrong, though.

About the wikisphere, no need to go beyond Judaism itself - try the Karaite rite (and the unrelated Turkic Karay ethnicity) - for comparison:

SheepDog-One's picture

Yup, and make sure to keep that piece of hard rock candy in your pocket. But its not fer eatin, just fer lookin thru.

drwells's picture

Putting the ratio of actual producers to looters and moochers at 50% might be a bit optimistic.

Hedge Jobs's picture

touching story.... maybe we should go abit easier on the ruling elite and stop giving them such a hard time.

personally, i find it highly ammusing watching the ruling elite cling to their elitist dream even as they realize the whole charade is crumbling around them. If you try not to take it all too seriously and come to terms with and prepare for what is happening its abit like living in a comedy show as the MSM veiw of the world just looks more and more ridiculous by the day.

They are getting very close to that one last lie that breaks the camels back and once the floodgates open there will be no truning back (ive probably used one too many analogies in there)  




chump666's picture

yeah i dig what this guy says....

forget it, huge pile of shit is gonna hit the fan very, very soon. if the very nervous, nutty trades some leveraged funds have made in the last 24hrs are any indication...

just smoke a blunt drink and have a shot of Goldschlager  



Commander Cody's picture

"...smoke a blunt drink..."?  Too many Goldschlagers for you.

breezer1's picture

hard time... they need hard time.

OldTrooper's picture

hard time... they need hard time.

With big, hairy-backed men who think they have real nice asses.

tpberg7's picture

(ive probably used one too many analogies in there)  

Yes, your liberal use of mixed metaphors is a challenging read!

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Metaphors mixed by Cuisinart.

StychoKiller's picture

"This house of cards will fall like dominoes, checkmate!" -- Zap Brannigan

russki standart's picture

(My lucky Day, I can reuse the same post, twice. Different article, but the same BS from the PTB).

To summarize the above, the criminal banksters, wishing to extend the ponzi, want to ensure that the sheeple will continue to pay interest on their loans. So they need another gimmick to convince the useless eaters to keep paying interest . The banksters, unlike the typical great unwashed, understand that the  loan principal will never be paid back in nearly all cases. The banksters, however, do not care since they lent them FRN´s backed by nothing other than military force and threats. No tangible value was given to the original  borrowers, courtesy of the printing press, so nothing was really lost. Rather, the trick is to keep the suckers paying interest, knowing full well that over the term of most mortgages and loans, far more money will be collected in interest than was ever ficticiously lent out.

mtomato2's picture

Hey, hey...  Just because we gave your props on the first one doesn't mean that you can keep coming back to the well...  :-D

Failure to Communicate's picture

In Soviet Union... nevermind.

Privatus's picture

Raoul Duke: Look, there's two women fucking a polar bear!

Dr. Gonzo: Don't tell me these things. Not now man.

HungrySeagull's picture

Ya know. It is damn good to be living in our own home paid for free and clear with maintaince ongoing to prepare the place for nother 20+ years of good quality home in lieu of buying a new or used home somewhere else.

Those Elites can go stuff it. We spend what we need to spend to make things happen, our way. No. More. Debt. We got one debt left to pay and when it's gone, no more debt ever again.


We have happily squandered our young lives for decades waving credit cards, student loans and buying useless bling and junk food following the great wagnerian Peid Piper of Marketing roaring a mantra of FICO score and chasing the mirage of riches built on bills due each month with repossession a likely after defaulting.


No. More. Debt.


If 300,000,000 People have NO. MORE. DEBT. and pay thier fair taxes properly each year and have enough to eat and not have to work two, three jobs or fight hand over fist for handouts and unemployment......


Just maybe the United States will have strength to make things happen on a Budget that has no debt on it.

The Elites have better start getting ready to provide for thier own living without lending us money or goods and services. They are going to have to count the few dollars they get in Taxes each Feburary. And then learn to live on just that plus, sales taxes all year.


I find this article personally offensive... however I enjoy this article VERY much because it is VERY well written and spot on. It only motivates me to maintain my resolve to do whatever it takes to stay out of debt and pay just the taxes I am supposed to pay and not one penny more.


And they can take the Health care and stuff it too. When I get too sick, just hang a IV on my bedroom post and have a in home caregiver show up to change the diapers and bathe until I pass on. And yes my burial is paid up free and clear as well as not to be a burden on anyone except those who have to drive my remains to the Creamatory.

Clampit's picture

In all honesty I have Housing Panic to thank for the sans mortgage part of my totally remodeled short sale. Same shit as ZH, one side was just better written, more informed, better researched, and most of all less conflicted. It aint rocket science kids.

Bartanist's picture

Ok, so you got rid of the mortgage and now all you have is the government lease.

So, what exactly happens to your "free and clear" home if you do not pay your annual government lease? Hint: the lease goes under the name of "real estate tax".

Clampit's picture

I don't mind paying my lease to the sate government; this lets me live much cheaper and keep my share of the MIC funding minimized. Besides, my state is one that will probably give the union the middle finger someday.

HungrySeagull's picture

Revenue office charges about 150 dollars each year for taxes on ev everything. In my state we have 8 months to pay it. It is usually paid off when the tax bill arrives in April. It covers local and State taxes on the property. The schools get the bulk, streets, police and fire get the rest.

Homestead act also takes care of the rest.

It costs nothing to maintain the property. Except labor and a little cash to feed the third party companies hired to come in and do small jobs.


There are taxes baked into each and every utility connected to the home and cell service, satellite etc. All of those are month to month with no contracts.

The rest of the stuff like vehicle registration and property taxes on those are so small as not to be of much impact the month they are paid out of the budget. For example Where I was raised it cost about 140 dollars plus emissions plus inspection plus insurance to get tags put on a car. Here it cost only insurance and 25 dollars to tag a vehicle. Provided that you can prove you paid the taxes on the sale up front. Which is usually deducted from either a private used car sale or baked into a new car financing.

Heck, The last two vehicles we bought, those were used and cash only. The taxes to the state bit kind of hard but we paid it with a smile knowing that once paid it is a one time deal.

I think to say to those who are stressed out living in expensive places like New York. They should quit struggling and move south where things are easy, slow and cheap.

svendthrift's picture

I used to worry about my country. I now worry about myself.

Bartanist's picture

IMO therein lies the problem with America. There is no common goal. There is no leadership that speaks for over 300 million of us. The elite try to whip us into a frenzy to want to go and slaughter innocent people in strange lands or to spend our money on things  made in China that we do not need.

They tell us the decrease in our freedoms is for our own good and the wealth they take from us will be put to good use for OUR future.

However, no matter how good they are at spinning their lies (and the newest professional liar/telepromter reader is very good), the lies always reveal themselves through the evidence around us. They care NOTHING about us and any thing they say to try to convince us that they do care is simply a lie concieved to extract something more. We are becoming exhausted. We have no more to give to liars and thieves.

As a result, we do what all people do in that situation. We protects ourselves.


svendthrift's picture

I agree that my attitude is a problem, but it is not the problem. Anyways, America is dead. I'm trying to move on (and out).

Goldenballs's picture

Bloody ungrateful,thats what you lot are.We are amongst the most highly educated,creative and talented people not just in this country,but in the world.You could have had it all,a job for life printing banknotes,and then whatever you wanted you could have brought,fancy that expensive new car,big new house,no problem just sign the loan forms and we,ll fix it so you can pay it all off at the end of the week,money will just go up that fast.Now you might well loose us to another country in the world where our skills will be appreciated,Zimbabwe is lovely at this time of year,they know whats good for em ........................... you could have had it all.

Spitzer's picture

Yet they still have guys like Robotrader convinced to sell Krugerrands and buy 30 year bonds.

svendthrift's picture

Driving home today (about 40miles) I counted 4 billboards advertising the powerball lotterty. Got me thinking.. Is that what keeps the peasants in line? The possibility that one is just a dollar ticket away from extreme wealth? What if the lotto was taken away and the peasants went without the last flicker of hope? I gotta read 1984 again.

Bartanist's picture

Hope and Fear, baby... only two ways to control a population. That is the classical belief.

I would add "distraction" as a recent addition to the list. Distraction creates apathy. Mass distraction creates mass apathy. TV, Video Games, Drugs ... all means of mass distraction. If you cannot control 300+ million then just distract 290 million of them and worry about manipulating the 10 million through hope or fear to do what you want.

Diabolically brilliant .... like some evil plan from Boris and Natasha or Pinky and the Brain.

Pinky's picture

+1 The Boris-Natasha-Pinky-Brain nexus often features at my blog.  Come to think of it I need to add that old rich guy from the Simpsons cartoon, whose name I can't remember because I threw my TV out the window (so to speak) two years ago.

American Dreams's picture

Mr. Burns


"There is no Shelter Here"

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture


Charles Montgomery 'Monty' Burns to be more precise.

RockyRacoon's picture

Your TV only had one channel?  Hmmmm. 

I guess you were speaking figuratively.

Kayman's picture

Lotteries- one more layer of taxation on the poor and Middle Class.

Soon to be foisted on America- the Value Added Tax.  Yes, a more "efficient" tax

but only if it is brought in in lieu of income tax, not in ADDITION to income tax.

downrodeo's picture

i once heard clif high talk about the 'karmic debt' associated with buying a lottery ticket. even if you win, your prize money will be tainted with the slight disappointment of the millions of people who didn't win. that adds up, and creates a large amount of negative karma within those winnings. he postulated that it may be the reason why many people end up worese off a short time after winning the lottery. seems to make sense to me, if you believe in that sort of thing...


whatever, read the lottery by shirley jackson if you never have


SheepDog-One's picture

YES! And another unemployment 'benefit', 24 months of em and counting, 40 million only eating because ObaMao sends them a monthly credik card (sorry thats how they say it) so YEA without the 'too comfy' lifestyle of the destitute, if it was 1940, dam straight the country would already have burned to the ground from riots.

Lord Welligton's picture

This is so fucked up it's not funny anymore.

And I'm not even American.