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Head Of Eurogroup Admits To Lying About "Secret Greek Meeting" Out Of Fears For Market Collapse - "When It Becomes Serious, You Have To Lie"

Tyler Durden's picture


On Friday the misinformation floated about the Greek expulsion event hit a fever pitch: while we correctly speculated that nobody would be expelled from the Eurozone, the amount of conflicting info was at an all time record, with glaring inconsistencies between various quoted authoritarians. Now, courtesy of the WSJ blog, we learn that, for the first time in history, a spokesman for Jean Claude Juncker, the PM of Luxembourg, and the head of the Eurogroup council of eurozone finance ministers, admits openly to having lied to media outlets. "In a phone call and text messages with two reporters for Dow Jones and the Wall Street Journal, Mr. Schuller repeatedly said no meeting would be held. He apparently said they same to other news outlets; at least one more moved his denials on financial newswires. Of course, there was a meeting–although not, apparently, to talk about Greece quitting the currency, which would be an extreme step to say the least. Mr. Juncker even said a few words to reporters who had hustled to Luxembourg to stake out the gathering. So why the lie? “I was told to say there was no meeting,” said Mr. Schuller, reached by telephone Monday. “We had certain necessities to consider.”  Necessities? Why yes: such as perpetuating the now open lie that is the ponzi market: "Evening in Europe is midday in the United States. “We had Wall Street open at that point in time,” Mr. Schuller said. The euro was falling on the Spiegel report, which had overhyped the meeting. “There was a very good reason to deny that the meeting was taking place.” It was, he said, “self-preservation.”" And there you have it: the Eurozone itself now admits that it will sacrifice credibility at the expense of a few FX pips and a few basis points in the ES.Everything else is smoke and mirrors. And people think that central bankers will consider the threat of inflation should the Russell 2000 ever retrace back into bear market territory...

And it gets even more surreal:

Asked whether such deliberate misinformation would undermine the market’s confidence in future euro-zone pronouncements, Mr. Schuller, lamenting that the market had practically no confidence in pronouncements already, said “not at all.”

When Mr. Juncker, or European Central Bank President Jean-Claude Trichet, or French Finance Minister Christine Lagarde says something to the markets, Mr. Schuller said, “nobody seems to believe it.”

Mr. Juncker has voiced support for the practice of lying before.

The Web site EUobserver has video of Mr. Juncker, at a conference on economic governance in April, expounding on the practice and reasons for lying in financial and economic communications.
Asked whether such deliberate misinformation would undermine the market’s confidence in future euro-zone pronouncements, Mr. Schuller, lamenting that the market had practically no confidence in pronouncements already, said “not at all.”

When Mr. Juncker, or European Central Bank President Jean-Claude Trichet, or French Finance Minister Christine Lagarde says something to the markets, Mr. Schuller said, “nobody seems to believe it.”

Mr. Juncker has voiced support for the practice of lying before.

The Web site EUobserver has video of Mr. Juncker, at a conference on economic governance in April, expounding on the practice and reasons for lying in financial and economic communications.

On the tape, Mr. Juncker says he has “had to lie” and, speaking about touchy economic topics, “When it becomes serious, you have to lie.”

At this point Europe no longer even attempts to hide that everything is one big lie, and that should the truth emerge the market will crash more than ever in history. And why would the US be any different? It woulnd't which is why we can now safely say that pretty much any information coming out from the government and its proxies that has a stock market impact is false until proven true. Of course, for everything else, one can blame the conspiratorial blogs...


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Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:52 | 1256152 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

THE Gods lied to us???.....

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:04 | 1256218 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

And the eurosheeple keep marching to the tune of the piper.

Off the cliff you go eurosheepie, off you go. YOU CAN FLY!!! BAT YOUR ARMS AND LEGS!!



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:14 | 1256236 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

An Illuminati blew his own head off on Saturday -

Todesdrama im Luxus-Chalet: Sachs wollte lieber sterben als vergessen

Opel Descendant And Playboy Ends His Life

His mother’s father was Wilhelm von Opel, son of the Opel founder Adam Opel. His father’s father was the enemy of the fixies: He invented the freehub. His company was a major supplier of auto parts. But that’s not how the world remembers Gunther Sachs, who shot himself on Saturday in his house in Gstaad, Switzerland.


 Translate this page

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:30 | 1256306 Ahmeexnal
Ahmeexnal's picture

If the europoliticians have also lied to China, my guess is the honeymoon is about to end.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:05 | 1256439 steveo
steveo's picture

Why do you say Illuminati?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:38 | 1256594 infotechsailor
infotechsailor's picture

he was dying of alzheimers and worried about looking like a fool. i mean, what is the alternative? 


either case, wouldnt say this is relevant.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:55 | 1256649 jus_lite_reading
jus_lite_reading's picture

Yes! He said that on May fourth.... You can find it here

He said, you have to lie....

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:32 | 1256777 macholatte
macholatte's picture


They say that Richard Cory owns one half of this whole town,
With political connections to spread his wealth around.
Born into society, a banker's only child,
He had everything a man could want: power, grace, and style.

But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I'm living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.

The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes:
Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show.
And the rumor of his parties and the orgies on his yacht!
Oh, he surely must be happy with everything he's got.

But I work in his factory
And I curse the life I'm living
And I curse my poverty
And I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be,
Oh, I wish that I could be
Richard Cory.

He freely gave to charity, he had the common touch,
And they were grateful for his patronage and thanked him very much,
So my mind was filled with wonder when the evening headlines read:
"Richard Cory went home last night and put a bullet through his head."

--- Richard Cory by Simon & Garfunkel

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:12 | 1256241 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

:) +10

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:04 | 1256445 Zero Debt
Zero Debt's picture

Pssst..Trichet..don't want to spoil the party but we need some wool for the winter too.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:43 | 1256363 trav7777
trav7777's picture

it's not lying if nobody believes it anyway

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:51 | 1256382 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

like noise I guess. If nobody hears it. Perhaps I could use this argument in court. Your honor, I know my client lied and forged that document but "when it becomes serious, you have to lie." What do you think? A jury will love that too.   

Tue, 05/10/2011 - 03:46 | 1258293 uhb
uhb's picture

SFG! +10000.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:25 | 1256528 Blano
Blano's picture

"And there you have it: the Eurozone itself now admits that it will sacrifice credibility at the expense of a few FX pips and a few basis points in the ES. Everything else is smoke and mirrors."

This is news???

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:52 | 1256631 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

That they would do it for a few basis points is indeed incredible news.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:00 | 1256684 edotabin
edotabin's picture

What? No prosecutors looking into this?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:03 | 1256696 Ferrari
Ferrari's picture

My understanding is that banking & government are serious business, so by this new declaration I deduce that bank & government officials are almost always lying. Before our xenophobia gets too out of hand, we should consider that at least this swine admits to lying, whereas the swine who run our public affairs would never be honest enough to admit that they lie.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:53 | 1256156 Quintus
Quintus's picture

Politician Lies - Shock!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:05 | 1256219 Cleanclog
Cleanclog's picture

And MSM lies.  Cuz the truth ain't patriotic.  It is patriotic to lie, if it means people consume and drive growth and capitalism.  Same for currency preservation and bond haircuts. The truth is damn inconvenient if it gets in the way of a good story/sham. Sigh.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:53 | 1256385 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

let's see it's patriotic to lie, steal, torture, murder...what have we left out? Oh yes, never to question. 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:08 | 1256229 Real Estate Geek
Real Estate Geek's picture

various quoted authoritarians



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:53 | 1256157 Cdad
Cdad's picture

Hmmmm?  Why ever would a central banking figure worry about a market collapse?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:57 | 1256178 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

THE wife's portfolio That hasn't be liquidated yet.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:41 | 1256607 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

The Onion has nothing on these guys! 'When asked if such news of blatant lying would undermine confidence in markets, Mr Eurodude laments theres no confidence anyway, so no admissions of lying will not undermine confidence'

Priceless shit here!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:56 | 1256654 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Mr. Eurodude is correct that he has no credibility.

The best way to regain credibility is to admit you have none!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:48 | 1256163 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

May it be that Mr. Juncker and his wife received the gift of fertility and many, many, teenage daughters and grand daughters.

“There was a very good reason to deny that the rendez vous was taking place.” It was, Miss Juncker said, “self-preservation.”


Miss Juncker says she has “had to lie” and, speaking about touchy personal topics, “When it becomes serious, you have to lie.”


“Mohammad and I had certain necessities to consider,” said Miss Juncker.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:55 | 1256165 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Q:     How do you know when The Bernank (aka Shakey McShakester) is lying?

A:     His lips are quivering.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:58 | 1256181 Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

B: hè shows up on television

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:04 | 1256195 Cdad
Cdad's picture

Brother Truth,

What seems to be quivering most today are momentum stocks.  Perilous...the thread there is definitely fraying...

The ETF/Stock arb trade is reporting smoke in the cockpit.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:44 | 1256360 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

All the self-professed chess grandmasters are getting the board in order right now, or so they think.

“The best plans of men and mice often go awry”


-- Robert Burns

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:56 | 1256167 JR
JR's picture

Why is telling the truth now?  Is he on his death bed?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:41 | 1256359 nonclaim
nonclaim's picture

By the Euro's death bed, for certain. It may take a while but he doesn't want to take the risk and is preparing everyone by clearly saying: everything is ok and sometimes we lie.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:58 | 1256169 hugovanderbubble
hugovanderbubble's picture

watch out volatility next hours...

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:56 | 1256172 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Well that's another shocker that will be (temporarily) good for my dollars.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 13:59 | 1256173 Missiondweller
Missiondweller's picture

Wait, bankers lie???????

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:02 | 1256207 JR
JR's picture

“When it becomes serious, you have to lie.” Like Now!

...You can’t make this stuff up.

How can a public official actually say, “You have to lie”?  Why then would you even want him to answer a question?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:02 | 1256184 silvertrain
silvertrain's picture

Does this mean the Steve Liesman is also lying to me??

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:10 | 1256242 nope-1004
nope-1004's picture

Ignorance is bliss.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:16 | 1256256 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Steve Sleazman reported earlier.



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:19 | 1256272 silvertrain
silvertrain's picture

That dude is funny..

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:19 | 1256496 Calculated_Risk
Calculated_Risk's picture

I can't stand that fucking propaganda channel!!!

Check this out.. accross the bottom it has the headline...

"Silver Loses It's Shine"

Meanwhile the guest goes on to say how the ETF's are a fraud, and only a fraction

of what is traded exists. And that the industrial demand alone will cause Silver to sky rocket..


Then, they have the commodities bitch come on, and say "there was NO REASON AT ALL FOR SILVER TO GO UP THE WAY IT DID. THE FUNDAMENTALS DON'T SUPPORT IT!!!"

REALLY?! The nimrods JUST had a guy on that VERY LOGICALLY explained how the FUNDAMENTALS could skyrocket the price!!!!!


CNBC is a fucking joke!!! I hope their world comes crashing down in a big fucking flaming shit pile. And if ANY one of those fuckers has gold, silver or anyother precious metals, they are robbed of them. Then crucified with silver nails, and the pictures of their crucifixion made into posters and strung up along every government building. To remind everyone for eternity what happens when you lie, cheat, and steal from the people that work, produce, and innovate, to make this country great.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:33 | 1256574 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

CNBC is nothing but a fucking joke parading whores for Wall St in plunged v necks and high skirts to keep the 401K bathrobe brigades placated at home a bit longer.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:55 | 1256668 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Nice rant!

Do you feel better now?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:02 | 1256185 Franken_Stein
Franken_Stein's picture


Shouldn't an imminent exit of Greece send the Euro higher ?

Since the remaining Eurozone countries would be stronger without the bottomless pit ?


Why then did the Euro fall ?

They will never give the Euro up entirely.


The better solution would be a 2-tier system, comprising a strong Northern Euro and a weak Southern Euro.

It would also reduce costs for exchanging all the pricing labels.


So we would need 2 ECBs or at least 2 sub-departments at the ECB in Frankfurt.

Interesting times ahead.


And yes, someone is gonna get raped in the process.

The banks. The banks ?

A-hahahahaha, that was a good one.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:07 | 1256225 pazmaker
pazmaker's picture

I think the fear is the dominoe effect.  Greece then Portugal, Ireland, Spain, Italy...where does it stop? The two tier Euro defeats the whole purpose of one currency for the Euro region in my humble opinion and would cause more problems rather then solutions.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:07 | 1256227 Cdad
Cdad's picture

Why then did the Euro fall ?

Goldman said so.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:44 | 1256616 oogs66
oogs66's picture

As soon as they create a strong northern euro and a weak southern euro I will be balls long the weak one. 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:00 | 1256190 Buckaroo Banzai
Buckaroo Banzai's picture

They don't even bother to hide the lies anymore-- Obama birth certificate, Bin Laden "assassination", and now this. Either they are falling apart, or their arrogance has swelled to unfathomable proportions.

I'm not entirely sure which is worse.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:17 | 1256265 centerline
centerline's picture


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:03 | 1256192 Newsboy
Newsboy's picture

100% discount on all statements by interested parties.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:01 | 1256202 financeguru500
financeguru500's picture

Important news everyone. I've been following on zerohedge for a few years now and I've been a member for about a year or so. I've been closely reading lately about the debt ceiling as well as following on the current financial crisis in the U.S.

I am currently a college student who is using the G.I. bill to pay for classes. I am prior coast guard and got out of the military in 2007 to attend college. Within the past few days, I received an email from the V.A. director at my college stating that she was "Requested by the V.A. to not turn in any of the requests for G.I. bill assistance until after JUNE 6th." She had emailed me as well as the rest of the students receiving G.I. bill to let us know that she is working to try and get us assistance for paying for classes but there would be issues getting summer tuition paid for due to this request by the V.A.

This is the first time I have ever heard of the V.A. doing something like this. I think it is due to the debt limit and the fact that the government is cutting all costs possible to not exceed the limit. Things are getting really serious if this is happening guys. I am really surprised this isn't on the news.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:12 | 1256237 bigwavedave
bigwavedave's picture

you need to ask for a copy of said 'request' in writing. as it has the potential to impact your rights your within bounds. if there is no written request from VA then you need to insist on a postmarked submission when its due.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:27 | 1256309 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

Finance guru - take some white or beige construction paper. Get a green crayola crayon.

Write denominations of $10,000 (or any other arbitrary number) on the construction paper in large font, with the inscription 'BernankBucks - Good for payment of all Fiatsko. In Krugman We Trust' on them. Paste a photo of John Maynard Keynes onto the front and a photo of Alfred E. Newman on the back. Cut into 3.5" by 6" sections. Mail or deliver as many as you need to the registrars office.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:50 | 1256379 Troublehoff
Troublehoff's picture




Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:32 | 1256317 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Thank you for your service.  Part of my undergraduate education was funded by my service as well.  Contact your local V.F.W., Lions Club, and Elk's Club, they can help.  Stay vigilant.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:39 | 1256345 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Tell her that the "request" she received is just that, it is merely a request. Then tell her you request her to file your GI Bill assistance today, as that is based upon an actual law, and not merely some mid-level bureaucrat desire to pinch pennies. If she gives you any "but I have to" stuff, ask her to request and produce a copy of the law that gives her the authority to override the GI Bill.

Then, ask her again to file. If she refuses a second time, explain how she isn't following any law, but willfully violating one, by her own choice. Then ask the exact spelling of her name, and other contact info to be turned over to your lawyer. Cut her no slack whatsoever, as she has already aligned herself with the criminals at the VA who are using pressure on others in order to renege on promises they otherwise have to honor. She just isn't expecting you to pressure back, but instead, to suck it up.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:49 | 1256376 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

Great point.  It is in fact a request, not the law.  The law is on your side, do NOT take the bait, I would say there is an 80% chance that your assistance will be processed.  This is an old government trick.  Misinformation buying the administrators some time.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:43 | 1256347 stollcri
stollcri's picture

I think they are just switching to an electronic certification system.

Not entering new data during a system cut-over is usually a good idea.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:07 | 1256464 JR
JR's picture

Financeguru: Would this be classified as ‘fudging,” or lying”? Whatever, I think you’re right; just more deception.

Gilbert and Sullivan: The Rose of Persia

Scent of Lilies: If you or I should tell the truth / We all shall be executed, / So won’t you try, / O noble-minded youth, / To tell the truth diluted? / As we all shall be thrown down a well, Pell-mell, If the truth we tell, / (You and I as well), / In a heap down a deep dark well ---

Yussuf: As you and I, the truth to tell, / Have naught but the truth to dread dear, / We’ll let the Truth lie at the bottom of a well -- / Or we shall be there instead, dear! / As we all shall be cast down a well, / Pell-mell, / If the truth we tell, (You and I as well), / Very fast down a nasty well –

Scent-of-Lilies: Well, well, / We’ll tell a fib instead, dear! / Instead dear! Instead…

All: A little tarradiddle idyll fib instead! / A little tarradiddle idyll, / Little tarradiddle idyll / Little tarradiddle idyll fib instead, dear!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:30 | 1256555 Catullus
Catullus's picture

I hate to say, but they rope-a-dope universities all the time with the education assistance. The NROTC would forget to sign the check for a few weeks to make my university sweat it out. Nothing like holding up a $1.7 million check.

Just make sure you're not in the hock for classes unless you know uncle Sam cut the check.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:03 | 1256212 andybev01
andybev01's picture

“When it becomes serious, you have to lie.”



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:25 | 1256302 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

You have to wonder what other red flags the international investment community need before they start to panic. Its really remarkable.  I cant wait to see how all these mopes running money react to a real systemic collapse , because QE will not prevent it.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:56 | 1256411 Troublehoff
Troublehoff's picture

Since the big FUBAR of 2008/9, this type of news has become the norm.

It will now take another huge event to get anyone to panic.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:37 | 1256581 SheepDog-One
SheepDog-One's picture

'When it becomes serious, you have to lie'...explains the last 2.5 years very well.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:59 | 1256679 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Explains all of human history well.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:06 | 1256213 Caviar Emptor
Caviar Emptor's picture

Tyler: forget about the Russell 2000 retracing to bear market. If it pulls back for 2 days there is general depression. 10% provokes visions of the Apocalypse. >15% would induce a replay of the Jonestown mass suicide 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:07 | 1256217 DonutBoy
DonutBoy's picture

Rod Serling just popped up on my monitor.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:06 | 1256221 suldog
suldog's picture

This is beautiful.  Finally tells the truth and its about lying.  

If only there were a free market left somewhere, this would have been have been a lot of fun to watch. 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:56 | 1256397 DaveyJones
DaveyJones's picture

think he's also lying about telling the truth

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:07 | 1256226 buzzsaw99
buzzsaw99's picture

It's all about "the market" bitchez!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:10 | 1256228 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture

Color me shocked

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:11 | 1256232 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

Juncker, Van Rompuy, Rehn etc, a bunch of pathological bs-talking EU-kleptocrats looking after the best interest of the insolvent banking cartel and a little slice for themselves of course. Like Nigel Farage asked in one of his legendary sessions in Brussels: Who the fuck are You, who voted for You? These same guys are one of the main puppet masters behind the Maastricht treaty-breaking bail out packages which are nothing more than additional multi hundread billion layer of new debt with no capital behind it. And esp Juncker is the main driving force towards common eurobonds and direct fiscal transfers from core europe to periphery. Who has given them the authority? Noone! It's about time to start holding these lying sacks of #### accountable for their actions.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:14 | 1256253 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Good luck with that (cuz yer gonna need it).

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:09 | 1256238 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

I hate to point this out. But this kind of official behavior, the ends justify the means, leads to something the Europeans should be very concerned about.

It is a subtle but important symptom.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:28 | 1256314 equity_momo
equity_momo's picture

william you are quite right. politicians will always look to pass the buck , blame someone else , take the path of least resistance , avoid hard decisions and generally lie lie and lie.   with the economy some from of facists wet dream , its quite a sobering thought to realize where this will end up....

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:28 | 1256315 bokapita
bokapita's picture

This is SO true. Ever since the Nuremburg Trials, "following orders" has been no defence to the charge of wrongdoing.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:46 | 1256370 kridkrid
kridkrid's picture

(looking for my copy of "Ominous Parallels") - yup... amazing what can be justified when the ends justify the means.  A little combination of pragmatism, dogmatism and no conscious.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 19:04 | 1257297 nohweh
nohweh's picture

Spot on Banzai. This is the dominant moral precept.  Secularism also ingores  "turn the 

other cheek" in favour of an "eye for an eye".

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:09 | 1256240 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

Asked whether such deliberate misinformation would undermine the market’s confidence in future euro-zone pronouncements, Mr. Schuller, lamenting that the market had practically no confidence in pronouncements already, said “not at all.”

When Mr. Juncker, or European Central Bank President Jean-Claude Trichet, or French Finance Minister Christine Lagarde says something to the markets, Mr. Schuller said, “nobody seems to believe it.”

This is the most insanely awesome thing I've read from a politico in... well... maybe forever!

When they come out and admit publicly to lying, then state that it has no ill effect because everyone expected the lie... wow. Then he tops it off with,

Mr. Juncker says he has “had to lie” and, speaking about touchy economic topics, “When it becomes serious, you have to lie.”

Yes, because there is no room for truth when serious economic events occur.

I think I need to go find a drink.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:10 | 1256243 Daedalus
Daedalus's picture

It seems to me that Jean Junckers has commited serious a breach of European securities law (my highlighting).

So who is going to prosecute him? Let me guess....

Market Abuse Directive (of the European Union) 2003/6/EC
Paragraph 12. Market abuse consists of ... market manipulation.
Article 1
2. 'Market manipulation’ shall mean ...
(c) dissemination of information through the media, including the Internet, or by any other means, which gives, or is likely to give, false or misleading signals as to financial instruments, including the dissemination of  rumours and false or misleading news, where the person who made the dissemination knew, or ought to have known, that the information was false or misleading.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:14 | 1256250 Cdad
Cdad's picture

Come now, let's not go applying laws to the criminal syndicate kleptocrats.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:22 | 1256285 Atomizer
Atomizer's picture


1.   An unintentional failure to notice or do something.


Snap snap. Grin grin, wink wink, say no more.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:10 | 1256245 Archimedes
Archimedes's picture

Eureka! So the politicians know they  are running a ponzi scheme and it will collapse one way or another. Either they have a deflationary collapse or hyperinflation that causes a deflationary collapse.

So the question is, why are they choosing the second option? I would pay two silver coins for that answer. Are they just buying time hoping a miracle happens?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:29 | 1256316 Pepe
Pepe's picture

Because with the second option they get to keep your wages down,keep you preoccupied with mere survival, keep you thankful that you still have a job even if it is only temporary and has no benefits,get to justify QE^n, continue filling their oceanic reserves without returning anything to you who loaned them the money in the first place; get to then play with the money you gave them, create a few bubbles, pretend to loose money, get bailed out and so on and on, laughing all the way to the bank. No pun intended.

Anyway the word today is : "We vare the champions"

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:37 | 1256336 Rynak
Rynak's picture

Kicking the can is easy and gets better publicity and corporate sponsoring, short-term?

I've always been of the opinion that the entire way how politics works is fundamentally broken, because it only holds people accountable for VERY short timespans. Oh, sure, by LAW they could in theory be persecuted beyond their terms..... this is working oh so great..... no, what IMO current political systems strongly lack, is the actions of persons and parties having CONSEQUENCES on themselves, not just shortterm. So, it being in their OWN interest to let stuff work well, instead of it just being "their job".

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:11 | 1256247 lizzy36
lizzy36's picture

So a EU member lies about an emergency meeting, Greeks lie about everything, and yet the only criminal investigation is by Portugal against the rating agencies.

I feel like it has been groundhog day, everyday for the last year.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:06 | 1256453 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

How vould they be so clumsy and sensitive?

Worse than a crime, Sire, you have committed an error!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:11 | 1256249 the not so migh...
the not so mighty maximiza's picture

For some reason the depeche mode song "lie to me" comes to mind.

Come on and lay with me
Come on and lie to me
Tell me you love me
Say I'm the only one

Experiences have a lasting impression
But words once spoken
Don't mean a lot now
Belief is the way
The way of the innocent
And when I say innocent
I should say naive
So lie to me
But do it with sincerity
Make me listen
Just for a minute
Make me think
There's some truth in it

Promises made for convenience
Aren't necessarily
What we need
Truth is a word
That's lost its meaning
The truth has become
Merely half-truth
So lie to me
Like they do it in the factory
Make me think
That at the end of the day
Some great reward
Will be coming my way

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:28 | 1256303 hedgeless_horseman
hedgeless_horseman's picture

You had something to hide
Should have hidden it, shouldn't you
Now you're not satisfied
With what you're being put through

It's just time to pay the price
For not listening to advice
And deciding in your youth
On the policy of truth

Things could be so different now
It used to be so civilised
You will always wonder how
It could have been if you'd only lied

It's too late to change events
It's time to face the consequence
For delivering the proof
In the policy of truth

Never again
Is what you swore
The time before
Never again
Is what you swore
The time before

Now you're standing there tongue tied
You'd better learn your lesson well
Hide what you have to hide
And tell what you have to tell
You'll see your problems multiplied
If you continually decide
To faithfully pursue
The policy of truth

Never again
Is what you swore
The time before

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:29 | 1256307 andybev01
andybev01's picture



For what sounds initially like frothy disco band, DM can blind-side you with a wallop of truth...that you can dance to. ;-)

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:14 | 1256254 lieutenantjohnchard
lieutenantjohnchard's picture

of course they lie. the ones that stand to lose the most are the biggest liars of all.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:16 | 1256257 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

they were for the truth before they were against it. 

damned germans!  can europe never have peace without dishonor?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:26 | 1256305 Oh regional Indian
Oh regional Indian's picture

'Can Europe never have peace without dishonour"

Wicked and subtle. Well played Slewie.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:15 | 1256266 css1971
css1971's picture

So... He is from this point on not going to be just "Jean Claude Juncker", but he can from this point on be called "the liar Jean Claude Juncker"


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:16 | 1256270 John McCloy
John McCloy's picture

Ha holy shit. More verifiable evidence that the #1 priority of all the central planner ponzi masters is the stock market, fraud perpetuation and manipulation. 

And they will even lie to the peons so long as the wealth assets of the elites stay inflated.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:20 | 1256275 treemagnet
treemagnet's picture

wow - just wow.  the only time the crook tells the truth is when the crime is done and over with.  Tyler said it, assume guilt until proven otherwise.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:22 | 1256284 tekhneek
tekhneek's picture

He's lying.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:28 | 1256301 tmosley
tmosley's picture

How could you tell? Were his lips moving?

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:24 | 1256289 NotApplicable
NotApplicable's picture

So much goodness that I almost forgot this gem.

“There was a very good reason to deny that the meeting was taking place.” It was, he said, “self-preservation.”"

Self-preservation, the number one goal of any institution, where any ways can be made to justify any means, just so long as it gets us past today. Because without the institution, there is no power available to be had, nor any place to hide from accountability for individual actions. So, the institution must be maintained, at all costs.

Tue, 05/10/2011 - 02:43 | 1258250 Roger Knights
Roger Knights's picture

" “We had certain necessities to consider.

And "necessity knows no law."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:23 | 1256295 Quinvarius
Quinvarius's picture

Can't have a panic where people pull out of the ponzi scheme.  And after the rigged commodity meltdown spilled into stocks, you can bet they will not try that kind of intervention again either.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:27 | 1256310 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

They are hoping that they can melt and water down the truth into a ocean of absurdity, hide it like the gulf spill and the ongoing nuke meltdown in Japan, claim so many things you say NOTHING at all.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:12 | 1256484 Hephasteus
Hephasteus's picture

You mean fractional reserve truth.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:43 | 1256605 MsCreant
MsCreant's picture

Yep, these fuckers just keep printing it, matters not the content at all. Fiat truth.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:35 | 1256325 Ancona
Ancona's picture

Truth? There is no truth......only the things "they" tell us.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 17:52 | 1257107 LudwigVon
LudwigVon's picture


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:36 | 1256331 b_thunder
b_thunder's picture

Goldman et al lie, deceive and publish fraudulent data every day.  If that causes panic - why is it out of order for someone else to use a lie to stop another lie from creaping panic?


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:37 | 1256338 Gubbmint Cheese
Gubbmint Cheese's picture

How very Ben Tre, "It became necessary to destroy the town to save it..."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:39 | 1256350 Cow
Cow's picture

I'm confused because Jeffrey Sachs, "professor" at Columbia Univ said that Greece was A-OK and that they could service their debt.

Fortunately, as Hugh Hendry says, Sach's tenure is intact.



Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:43 | 1256351 emsolý
emsolý's picture

"Jerry, just remember, it's not a lie if you believe it." ~ George Costanza

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:44 | 1256368 Cow
Cow's picture

"the memos were fake, but true" - Dan Rather

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:44 | 1256358 poydras
poydras's picture

Does this mean that Freddie and Fannie are undercapitalized?

Let's all move to Finland.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:46 | 1256365 falak pema
falak pema's picture

This is the Fukushima syndrome exposed in all its horrific reality across three continents in the financially globalised world where they have one common agenda : lie, lie, lie!

Now as the shit hits the fan and Greece says more money please! Wait for Portugal to sing same song, then Ireland, until the shit hits Spain. Then Merkel will have to do the fox trot out of EU like a virgin valkyrie running from the debt satyrs the financial world has created, or else she plays Imperial Uber alles and declares all EU is part of Deutsch colony! To save the financial Oligarchy like a dumb political slave!

Who knows where she will go, as imperial play is first and foremost a game of false mirrors. We don't know what is being planned until its too late... In any case the "shit hits the financial fans" on three continents, is hotting up...lay on Macduff and damn'd be he who cries...My currency says hold enuff!...

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:47 | 1256369 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

When do we get a website dedicated to those that died due to airing CB's dirty laundry?  One akin to the BP one

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:05 | 1256441 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Thank you.

This is very troubling if the details can be verified.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:48 | 1256381 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

"To Default or Merely Pretend Not to Default, That is the Question."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:53 | 1256395 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

This is all so unhealthy.

I have wasted the past 2.5 years waiting for 'impending collapse'.

My grades have suffered, I became an alcoholic, my relationships have suffered, I have lost interest in things I previously loved... It is all so depressing.

Yet the stock market continues to scream higher after 'greatest collapse' in history and DESPITE already rallying 100% off the lows.

You cannot make this shit up.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:05 | 1256447 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

slewie understands;  at least a little, ok?

spring semester was always stressful for me, too.  if only the assholes had let me take more incompletes!

just saw yer note from last nite, too.  have a great summer, kiddo! 

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:25 | 1256527 css1971
css1971's picture

Cheer up.

It's nature, things change. No need to get depressed about it. You just plan for the change and then go on with life as it is. When the shit hits the fan you have a contingency. If it doesn't, no biggie.

Perspective. Take a look behind, what is there? 4 billion years of uninterrupted life and evolution leading up to you, here, now. You have any idea just how lucky you are? You think what we're going through now is big? Not a bit of it.


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:31 | 1256558 ebworthen
ebworthen's picture

If you knew the Titanic was going to sink just think; what a horrible voyage!

Pretend you will be on one of the lifeboats with a handsome swarthy sailor rowing you to rescue.

Meanwhile, don't drink alone, dance with abandon, and love like there is no tomorrow.

Besides, thinking positive and laughing in the face of doom bouys your compatriots, confuses the stupid, and angers the malfeasant.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:30 | 1256560 TruthInSunshine
TruthInSunshine's picture

This is all so unhealthy.

I have wasted the past 2.5 years waiting for 'impending collapse'.

My grades have suffered, I became an alcoholic, my relationships have suffered, I have lost interest in things I previously loved... It is all so depressing.

Yet the stock market continues to scream higher after 'greatest collapse' in history and DESPITE already rallying 100% off the lows.

You cannot make this shit up.


As soon as you complete a 12 step program and sober up, Dow goes to 5,000 - Spooz to 604 and Naz gets chopped in half.

This is how The Bernank works it.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:50 | 1256625 baby_BLYTHE
baby_BLYTHE's picture

yep. then after that they will come for our gold!

No one will part me from my precious metals without first staring down the end of my glock (trained and know how to use ;)

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:51 | 1256646 LawsofPhysics
LawsofPhysics's picture

"They" will starve you out and simply wait.  Then they get you gold and your glock.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:55 | 1256667 Dick Darlington
Dick Darlington's picture

That's the spirit! =)

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:14 | 1256715 slewie the pi-rat
slewie the pi-rat's picture

that's better! 

i met this guy in the states, abt ten years after nixon and kissinger surrendered to mao & china.  i e'd him a while back and we caught up a bit.  he invited me to oregon and told me we could blow some shit up and then climb up on the water tower and shoot a bunch of guns.

check out brian's video:  YouTube - Brian Wizard's Viet Nam War Promo-video


Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:56 | 1256652 DoChenRollingBearing
DoChenRollingBearing's picture

Non illegitimi carborundum, baby_BLYTHE!

You are better prepared than most. 

Call a friend or two or three and get out and have some fun!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:56 | 1256663 JR
JR's picture

It’s hard to go farther out on a limb with the market manipulators because it’s definitely contrary to a supply and demand economy.  And since so many people are suffering because of this transfer of wealth to the financial sector, it points to a cancer in our central government that if not removed, a fair stock market is the least of our worries. Many people resistant to high risk, myself included with some of my real estate down 30 percent, are finding themselves in a low-return investment box with few exits.

It helps keep your balance to remember there is substitution bias in the stock market iust as there is in Econoday ‘s retail sales reports that only measures sales at stores that have been open for 12 months or more; those that have gone out of business are simply tossed aside. 

As Nathan Martin says: “This is the same exact error that causes people to think that STOCKS rise over the long haul when in fact stocks on a whole do not rise in the long run – they live through a life cycle and eventually die.  It is only the indices that rise, and that rise over the long haul is ONLY due to substitution bias.” GE is the only company listed in the Dow Jones Industrial Index today that was also included in the original index in 1896.

Last week Waterfallsparkles #1247699 put into words the pain felt my many from the financial policies of our unelected masters :

"The Stock Market doubling does not create confidence.  Instead it creates resentment among Americans. 

"They slowly watch themselves being sacrificed with the lower Dollar purchasing power, Higher Food costs, Higher Gasoline costs, Higher Heating costs, Higher clothing costs.  No interest on their savings, no COLA for Social Security for 2 years.  How does this make them feel better about the economy.  It is quite the reverse as they resent the Banks that killed the Economy being the only ones that have benefited from the 'RECOVERY'.   Recovery, for whom?  Not for the Middle Class.  This causes resentment and will end up with class warfare.

"Bernanke may have studied the Great Depression but he must have skipped earlier History.  Like the fall of Rome, Egypt (let my people go), Marie Louie Antoinette, the French Revolution, the Tea Party, the war of 1812."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:04 | 1256698 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

Your capitulation may indicate a reversal, but not immediately.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:44 | 1256846 falak pema
falak pema's picture

go make passionate love and forget the'll always catch up with you...but you will have lived!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:58 | 1256410 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

This shows they are more scared than they previously let on.

Now that they have lost their credibility and displayed a weak hand their future positive comments will be ignored as "lies."

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:58 | 1256417 Urban Redneck
Urban Redneck's picture

"Jean Claude Juncker, the PM of Luxembourg"

Luxembourg is a bank not a State, his title should be CEO not Prime Minister.

That a bank, openly run by a banker, holds the Presidency of the Euro Group, during an Euro banking crisis, and the Banker-in-Chief will not only openly lie, but admit to opening lying, leads me to believe to me there is a God, and he has one very twisted sense of humor.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:59 | 1256424 oogs66
oogs66's picture

You can't handle the truth!  So we won't give it to you :D

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 14:59 | 1256427 WideAwake
WideAwake's picture

it's all ball bearings.... there and here.  for sure 100% our "news" will turn to reflect the wishes of the money master.... qe2 nears and end? best scare the sheep into qe3. If that doesn't work we can fall back on the "elevated" terror threat to distract and advance the agenda.  All M/S/M freaking the F out about the next attack. 13 headline on Drudge alone. It's extend and pretend at all costs yo.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:31 | 1256557 pazmaker
pazmaker's picture

it's all ball bearings.... there and here.



No wonder DoChen is doing so well!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:12 | 1256474 Silver Bug
Silver Bug's picture

Well you quickly learn to never believe anything they say anyway. Its pretty sad we have gotten to that point. Greece has no choice, they need to leave the EU, or face total destruction.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:15 | 1256483 DonutBoy
DonutBoy's picture

I'm afraid the words "Secret Greek Meeting" brought forth a disturbing vision involving Trichet and Papandreou.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:17 | 1256501 topcallingtroll
topcallingtroll's picture

With friends like trichet who needs enemies?

This is the biggest bomb yet dropped on the unified Euro.

Greece is now permanently excluded from the debt market.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 16:49 | 1256850 falak pema
falak pema's picture

nothing is permanent when you have the mediterranean.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:17 | 1256503 Bubbles the cat (not verified)
Bubbles the cat's picture

OK I accept the blogs thing (and email too). A few carefully chosen idle words can destroy faith, hope and the economy of an entire nation. But what about the goddam weather? Let's not forget the wholesale market mayhem an unseasonal dry spell, dump of snow, freezing fog or unexpected rain squall can cause. We should keep a tight rein on meteorologists and a particularly close eye on their media assistants, with their often bullish stances on high (and low) pressure systems and overly complicated barometric charts. In my experience, they are not to be trusted. Under any circumstances.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:19 | 1256510 SecondComing
SecondComing's picture

Oldie but a goody:

“If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.”

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:23 | 1256521 SecondComing
SecondComing's picture

And, of course, this gem:

"When a well-packaged web of lies has been sold gradually to the masses over generations, the truth will seem utterly preposterous and its speaker a raving lunatic."
-Dresden James aka. Donald James Wheal
Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:22 | 1256530 Misean
Misean's picture

To bad he used "L" as the first letter instead of "D" in that statement. He would likely have received resounding applause and millions of offers of assistance.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:26 | 1256532 Johnk
Johnk's picture

Man I love the internet.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:27 | 1256534 wisfool
wisfool's picture

"... that everything is one big lie, and that should the truth emerge the market will crash more than ever in history."

Its not 'one big lie'... and therein lies (no pun intended) the conundrum. 

There are SO MANY LIES (relatively speaking) ... little white lies here, huge lies there, sneaky lies over here, half-truths over there, etc. etc... and there are SO MANY TRUTHS (relatively speaking).

Its not like math were a small negative number added to a large positive number reduces the large positive number... you can't add the truth and subtract the lies so the result is the TRUTH.  Everyone ends up with a different TRUTH.  Lies and Truths are not additive.

As a fxtrader you strap on the seat belt, pack extra food and clothing in the water-proof bag, and RIDE THE F*CKING WAVE however it is generated!  Lies, Damned Lies, and ...

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:29 | 1256544 buzlightening
buzlightening's picture

Just adding up the facts. Debt ceiling raised insures QEIII to cover turbo tax cheat timmys 2 trillion.  BRICS exiting USDINKers along with Japan having no choice in rebuilding infrastructure. Gold eagles on pace to blow out records.  Silver eagles would be a monster May month for silver eagles but US Mint is out.  States ramming through US Mint bullion coins legislation as legal tender most likely front running to purchase all they can before the FRN turns to shit paper.  Sheila! Our paper ponzi F*dic bair is leaving 7/8. Don't blame her for buggin out. She sees the bankster fraudster collapse coming. Doesn't care to be near any ones 10 foot lying pole-nokio when it caves.Just doin the math and certain gold silver US Mint bullion coins will be very needed when FRNs blow up; vaporize to ashes!!!

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:37 | 1256591 magpie
magpie's picture

Jawbone Accomplished.

Mon, 05/09/2011 - 15:38 | 1256597 lynnybee
lynnybee's picture

i just love this posting & all the comments ...... i'm also waiting for the big collapse, got my foodstuffs that are expiring & managed to accumulate silver during 2010.......... i'm waiting...... i know it's coming, maybe tomorrow, maybe in 5 years, but, it is coming.    

CRIMINALS, LIARS, THEIVES, SCAM ARTISTS, CON MEN .......... IT'S ALL LIES & THIEVERY.   "they" (whoever "they" really are, I'm still waiting for the big expose, Pulitzer-Prize winning, scam-exposing article about ROBERT RUBIN & BILL CLINTON) .... anyway, "they" will go on as if nothing ever happened while the rest of us collapse into nothingness unless the good guys ROUT THEM OUT OF THEIR DENS of THIEVERY !

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