Here Are Today's Very Unhappy Campers

Tyler Durden's picture

We posted the largest holders of BP stock previously, but, heck, we'll do it again, just for shits and giggles. We dare our readers to spoof Goldman/State Street/BoNY's repo desk phone number and call any of these deep value investors. Over under on straight to voicemail is at 100%. (p.s. spoofing phone numbers is illegal so now that you know what to do, don't do it).

And due to popular demand here is RIG...



Bottom line: Bob Doll heart oil.

via CapIQ


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etrader's picture

Doesn't look pretty for some of UK's "part" nationalized banks RBS & Lloyds

Sudden Debt's picture

These english guys sure do like oil. I thought this oil thing was a all American thing.

Better start shorting the pound again? :)

Arco's picture

Looks like a lot of pension fund money to me...

Crummy's picture

There's no better way to wind up the toy soldiers on your behalf than to sell them a pound of your flesh at a discount today in case shit goes south tomorrow.

That's the difference between a hedge and a hedgerow.

primefool's picture

Yeah pension money - so no big deal - they'll just go crying to the govt and get bail out dough - umm - that would be dough from us - those that were prudent investors and managed tp preserve some dough - yeah that dough .

trx's picture

When there's counterpart's to be found - we'll be there.

When there's trade to unwinde - we'll be there.

When there's chapter 11's to be filed - we'll be there.


NBIM - wasting money for future generations



thomas pain's picture

we'll see what pensions, funds, banks, and soverign orgs hold the bag on BPs default swaps. its going to be a rough one bailing out the entire financial system once the 4th largest company swaps go mark to market

Steaming_Wookie_Doo's picture

I've noticed a lot more rhetoric on more 'mainstream' sites about "if you hurt BP, you're hurting pensioners and widows". This is but a slice of the big picture, which is: if you have a pension, it is really mark-to-fantasy. It's like trying to fetch your car keys once they've fallen into a lava floe. It's gone man, it's just gone.

As for BlackRock's seemingly dismal choices, I am guessing that mgmt doesn't drink from the same trough they pour this dreck into...

Mako's picture

A guy on CNBC last week told me BP was a strong buy.  

WTF happened.  :)

"Everyone has a plan until they get hit" - Mike Tyson

Could be information that a nuke may be the only choice, you are talking years to plan something like that.  The company will not exist if that happens. 


Calculated_Risk's picture

+100 First time I've seen someone quote Tyson... and a good one too!

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

"Everyone has a plan until they get hit" - Mike Tyson

I think the correct quote is: "Everyone has a plan until they get BIT."

Is it just me?

Hephasteus's picture

All they have to do is hold on till elections. Too bad they won't make it.

nom nom nom nom

Oracle of Kypseli's picture

The saddest one is the Scottish widows Fund.

No mercy there.

knukles's picture

They get hit by Tyson, too? 
Or was it only Frank Purdue?
Just hurts so much when I get hit,
Watching the retirement go to shit.

Please help me Barry
And bail me out,
Or I'll vote for another,
Without a doubt. 

Or give me a job
As a GS 16,
Mopping up oil,
New retirement scheme.

Not so large cap anymore,
Micro cap lies just in store,
Bankruptcy filing doubtless comes
Settlement money, I'll get none.

Dry Butt Shave

Sudden Debt's picture

Tyler, It might also be interesting to see in wich holdings BP also has stock, because when they will need money, these are the first stock they will sell pushing those stocks down.

You think they have stock in drillers, refineries and other oil companies?

Sespian's picture

Interesting point you bring up.  I'd like to know as well.

Also...Can anyone confirm whether or not Halliburton bought all outstanding stock of Boots & Coots (America's largest oil response clean up company) on April 12, 2010?  If confirmed that is one strange coinkidink...

Sudden Debt's picture

If that where to be true, the mand should be rewarded


seek's picture

Holy crap, this is way past a rumor:

see also:

In a word, it's confirmed, for $240M, roughly half stock, half cash.

It's hard not to see a conspiracy in everything these days.



New_Meat's picture

@sudden -- Here's link, don't have time now to dig.

dang, that green reminds me of my son when he was like 8 weeks old.

- Ned

Sudden Debt's picture

THX! I'll read tomorrow during lunch :)

Gold...Bitches's picture

You believe they have extra money lying around after bonuses to infinity to actually invest in other going concerns?

MayIMommaDogFace2theBananaPatch's picture

Don't worry -- they'll make more.

MsCreant's picture

So many ways to "make" money, isn't there? 

1. Print/coin.

2. Create electronic data on a computer screen.

3. HFT = skim it off the top of every sale by decimal cents.

4. Charge outrageous fees that are not discussed well on the front end.

5. Manipulate markets and tell your friends what will move where, how, and when. Have them lay some money down on the table for you, too.

6. Front run your own customers' orders.

7. Insert other Ponzi schemes here.

8. Earn a dividend on an honest investment.

9. Earn interest on money lent to compensate lender for risk.

10. Earn it through honest labor.


I know, the last three are absurd but they had to be included.


ZeroPower's picture

"Scottish widows investment prtnership"

No shit? I thought people who said BP was owned by widows was just rhetoric.

Is there an Orphans LLC which owns BP as well?

Sudden Debt's picture




He bought this stuff at 52$ I think "for the orphans" :)

Dirt Rat's picture

No, widows and orphans stock is a legal concept. The fiduciary (i.e. lawyer) who handles the money for others can be required to invest/hold it in certain equities. These are very conservative investments like utility and treasury bonds and large cap companies with proven records. Some states have a predetermined list of widows and orphans equities. Up until April 20, BP would have been considered rock solid. If the lawyer's fiduciary duties had been called up for review, no judge would have second guessed or penalized the lawyer for holding BP stock as long as the lawyer had diversified the portfolio.

jburg4826's picture

Who is on the other side of the CDS trade?

Cheeky Bastard's picture

Probably everyone with half a brain cell since BP is not going BK [you might have some problem with CCs if another downgrade or two occur]. You sell CDS on 100B net notional and hedge yourself when the spread tightens [and I guarantee you; it will tighten] just to lock the profits. But if you want individual names; I will bet you my left nut; DD of UK banks are selling the protection right now [probably under direction of Downing Street 10]. Give Barclays, RBS and maybe even Lloyds a call if you want to know more.

Sudden Debt's picture

also I think BP will start flooding the market with futures ENRON style on future earnings to try to get their hands on more oil pushing the oil price down.

Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

Teachers Ass.?  Jesus....would someone tell pension funds to wake up already?  The game is over.  It is over.  Go home and spend some time with your families.  Your money has been burned at the alter of the Federal Reserve.  The "Temple" took your wealth and burned it as a sacrifice to their god.

Sudden Debt's picture

remember 2008? when everybody sold pension funds started to notice there was a crisis.

Speed and Pension funds don't go together.

In there offices they have stickers saying:

Walking at 2miles a hour is speeding!

Speaking is silver, silence is GOLD!

Our office plants don't need whisky like you do!



Mr Lennon Hendrix's picture

exactly.  pension funds remind me of junk food junkies.

"Run pension funds!  Run for your lives!" Say I.  "I can't I am full of Hamburger!"

LeBalance's picture

"You need to be able to pick out the easy meat with your eyes closed." Animals - Floyd

floydian slip's picture

and that my friend is a floydian slip :)

StychoKiller's picture

I thought it was: "Silence is Golden, Duct tape is Silver!"

If I didn't know better, I'd say God hates somebody in the UK.

Strom's picture

How much of that is actually owned by those companies, and how much of it is in funds that are owned by 401(k) bagholders?

Sudden Debt's picture

I even gets worse. A lot of these funds are part of "Smart Funds" owned and sold by European banks.

I actually have 3 of these funds that contain 4 funds out of the list.

ING, KBC, AEGIS, BNP and DEX are the first I know that have these.


Leo Kolivakis's picture

Norway's Global Pension Fund is huge, but you'd think they have enough exposure to oil. :)

trx's picture

Of a total NOK 2,7 trillion, more than 10% is invested in the PIIGS countries. (bonds and equities)

Nearly 50% is invested in chinese equities. Finacials, Oil&Gas and consumer goods. (pluss additional bonds).

And because of its size, it can't sell stuff too fast...imagine the impact on the market if the fund dumped all its chinese equities at once....


LMAO's picture


Norway's Pension fund is mainly run by a fascist regime consisting of clueless politicians who pay shitloads for advice to the same people who are ripping them off. 

Fortunately they have stumbled over a bag of gold (oil) and as long as the sheeple aren't aware of the hand behind the curtain drawing them deeper into the fascist cesspool and the monopolistic schemes they deploy it's business as usual.

They have soooo much money that they just can't put any of it to good use because they are afraid they'll create inflation.


The only thing left is to burn it in the equity casino and have their financial cronies being paid handsomely on the transactions.



trx's picture

Wow ! That's some amazing insight....

Unfortunatly I'll have to agree with you on most issues:

* Clueless politicians. There's supposed to be an independent oversight committe for the Pesion Fund, but they openly admit that they don't understand a shit of today's financial markets, and how the fund really operates.The politicians come and go, and seldom have a strategy that goes further than two years.

* Norway's oil wealth is pure dumb luck. But over a periode of 50 years, the people in the business have become some of the most skilled in the industry. However, the politicians who, in fact, are in charge of the States operations relay on advisors (also called "lobbyists") when making their decisions. The Norwegian oil industry looks very defferent through the eyes of politicians, than through the eyes of the people in the industry itself. The whole scheeme is run by special interests, but you can hardly call it a conspiracy.

* And yes - Norway - after developing a highly competative oil producing industry to transform the oil into money - they don't really have a clue what to do with it. Quite a paradox. They really can't pump all of it into the economy. Some have seriously suggested that they should give it all away...

* And sadly, they've decided to burn it in the equity casino instead (after selling all their gold in the mid 70's).


Imagine having a party going for 50 years.

Then - the hangover...


By the way; here's some of the latest news from the Norwegian Government Pension Fund, and an example of the current investment strategy:

"Pension funds urge chocolate industry to end child labour"







LMAO's picture

Thx for the input trx

As to the following: "The whole scheme is run by special interests, but you can hardly call it a conspiracy"


Maybe I didn't make myself clear but the remark:

"as long as the sheeple aren't aware of the hand behind the curtain drawing them deeper into the fascist cesspool and the monopolistic schemes they deploy it's business as usual"

Was not intended to refer to an ongoing conspiracy.

We can easily draw parallels between todays' Wall Street cronyism and the robbing of the taxpayer in broad daylight. It's blatant and no attempts are made to hide it from the public. There seems to be so much complacency that nobody seems to give a flying fcuk.......Until it's too late that is.


My best guess is that 99.9 % of the Norwegians are happily ignorant about what is going on. "Giske" openly rallying the fascist troops by creating special interest groups of "The filthy rich" to loot the taxpayer. Having people like Berg-Hansen in a gov. position where she can decide on the rule of law for her own company is quite mind-boggling.

Examples are plentiful. Norway, as being the last Soviet State in the world (Björn Rosengren, may be right afterall), is rapidly embracing fascism. It's written all over the place but nobody is reading.



Joe Shmoe's picture

Pretty much every fund company I've ever used.