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Here Comes The Scramble For Capital: JPM To Raise $4 Billion

Tyler Durden's picture




Even as JPM Jamie was crowing earlier about how great JPM's feces smell, and how the future is so bright, he's gotta wear Dimonshades, a little yet very important headline hit Bloomberg. To wit:

BN  *JPMORGAN $1.25 BLN 30-YR DEBT MAY PAY 165 BASIS-POINT SPREAD
BN  *JPMORGAN $2.75 BLN 10-YR DEBT MAY PAY 180 BASIS-POINT SPREAD

Oops.

Is JPM, with its massive cash trove, suddenly a little more nervous about the teeny, weeny foreclosure problem? Furthermore, with JPM seeing $4.35 billion in TLGP maturities on December 1 and 2, which are paying ridiculously low taxpayer-subsidized rates, just how big will the cash crunch to JPM suddenly be? And all this avoids the fact that JPM's overly optimistic NPL charge off projections will have to be revised dramatically higher as shadow foreclosures, ironically, suddenly surge, and remain in suspended animation until the "moratorium" is lifted, only to flood all over the banks and their fraudulent and massively mismarked balance sheets, like a pent up tsunami, once the next foreclosure wave is released.




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Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:11 | Link to Comment truont
truont's picture

*JPMORGAN $1.25 BLN 30-YR DEBT MAY PAY 165 BASIS-POINT SPREAD
"A fool and his money are soon parted..."

 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:13 | Link to Comment Bob
Bob's picture

One would think that competent managers would see that this is not the time to be paying multi-billions in bonuses.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 17:59 | Link to Comment dlmaniac
dlmaniac's picture

Would 4B be enough to cover the loss on their naked silver bets?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 19:42 | Link to Comment pamriallc
pamriallc's picture

Capitalism, then, is by nature a form or method of economic change and not only never is but never can be stationary. … The opening up of new markets, foreign or domestic, and the organizational development from the craft shop and factory to such concerns as US Steel illustrate the same process of industrial mutation—if I may use that biological term—that incessantly revolutionizes the economic structure from within, incessantly destroying the old one, incessantly creating a new one. This process of Creative Destruction is the essential fact about capitalism.

Capitalism, Socialism, and Democracy, Joseph Schumpeter (1942)

Shawn A. Mesaros, Pamria, LLC

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 23:10 | Link to Comment Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

JPMorgan's toilet paper mache fortress balance sheet (pronounced shit). An arrogant ass and his job are soon parted.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:12 | Link to Comment jaap
jaap's picture

in need of money to short something??

 

 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:13 | Link to Comment frankTHE COIN
frankTHE COIN's picture

He's in denial. Admit Dimon into ZERO HEDGE HOUSE.

Whether he suffers from Crack Spread overload or Yellow Cake Arb we will not rest until we dry him out.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:14 | Link to Comment Dagny Taggart
Dagny Taggart's picture

Oh, no! JPM got a margin call on those silver shorts, too? Gotta cover 'em at some point, boys.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:18 | Link to Comment MarketTruth
MarketTruth's picture

JPM has HUGE shorts on silver and they are on the wrong side of the trade by a very high dollar value. Fuck 'em, couldn't happen to a better bunch of scam artists and market manipulators!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:21 | Link to Comment Dagny Taggart
Dagny Taggart's picture

Can't wait to see how they transfer those losses to the taxpayers and shareholders. But their bonuses are a lock, so its all good.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:26 | Link to Comment web bot
web bot's picture

I could spray my unadulterated vulgar venom regarding how I feel about these #uckers and their class, but it's the time of day that children may be looking over your shoulders, so I won't.

Just #uck them all. #uck every last one of them.

The Gold/Silver ratio is now at 56. Something is happening regarding silver. Any clown that thinks Gold & Silver are in a bubble are in for a rude awakening. When the bubble pops (the USD tsunami of free cash piled into the bond market), there will be a rush of money INTO the PMs like we've never seen before. PMs are not in a bubble, they will be the recipient of the bubble.

Now back to cursing these #uckers...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:34 | Link to Comment Kaiser Sousa
Kaiser Sousa's picture

yeah i luvin this...

fuck a banker and his debt coupon currency....

man our "Gentleman's money" is kicking they ass...

 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 21:24 | Link to Comment Lionhead
Lionhead's picture

Web bot, you are correct; here's the evidence of the increasing appetite for gold over US treasuries:

http://jsmineset.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/Gold-Bond-ratio-10-13-2010.pdf

Bernanke has sown the seeds of his destruction & his minion banks; be patient & enjoy the show. Watch for defaults on JPM's futures contracts. Jamie will "burn bright" someday.

Fri, 10/15/2010 - 10:50 | Link to Comment web bot
web bot's picture

Thanks for the chart. Here's more of my sock puppet thinking...

Make no mistake about it. The end game is hyperinflation and a collapse of the USD. Despite that pesky problem of social unrest for a bit, it will allow the US to emerge literally debt free (inflation destroys the value of debt) and to be in a position to somwaht retain its level of global strength and influence.

Don't think for a moment the US Gov't has not already run these scenarios. It's the only way to get out of this $13,500,000,000,000.00 debt (or if you like, unfunded liability of $23,000,000,000,000.00). Ya - just stare at those #uckin zeros until your stomach starts to get a sick feeling.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:24 | Link to Comment Clark_Griswold ...
Clark_Griswold Hedge Mnger's picture

ain't that a bitch.....lol

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:14 | Link to Comment ZeeGerman
ZeeGerman's picture

Come on out so daddy can see you!!!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:15 | Link to Comment AGORACOM
AGORACOM's picture

Ritholtz has a must read article at: http://bit.ly/cWEtFp  Here are just two excerpts that tell me this is going to get ugly and fast:

 

We are not suggesting a Lehman style crisis will necessarily occur. We are suggesting
that if the investigation of front-end documentation practices uncovers assignment
failures in any scale resembling the back-end foreclosure processing failures, the scale of uncertainty could create a market response reminiscent of that Lehman period.

Then the article ends off with:

“Unfortunately, the rising uncertainty is only increased by the current reality that real
estate, trust and many of the related tax issues are currently addressed as state rather than federal issues. Other than offering to act as referee, short of a politically charged battle that may result from asserting interstate commerce authorities, there appears no current opportunity for the federal government to create a uniform solution.”

My Conclusion - In short, there is no wand for the Feds to waive.

As such, I don’t see how Wall Street can get out of this mess. Home owners are not going to make their payments until they can figure out who to pay, while investors (who are no doubt salivating at a chance to get at Wall Street) will be filing suits against trustees.

Check mate. Hold on to your hats, I think this is going to get really ugly. With no wand for the Feds to waive it will be long and ugly.

Regards,
George ... The Greek ... From Canada

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:22 | Link to Comment LeBalance
LeBalance's picture

Bank Holiday

OR

War

OR

False Flag Continental US Nuke or CBW Strike

There's three buwwets in the gun, Elmer, you spin and shoot, we'll just be over there.

.....a short while later...

We didn't say "Elmer, fan the trigger!"  Oh holy shit!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:23 | Link to Comment traderjoe
traderjoe's picture

Both CNBC and Bloomberg have had guests on today that appropriately reference this as a problem for ALL titles (and not just foreclosures). Statements like "clouded title on all homes" and "no one might be able to convey their title" are starting to make it into the MSM.

Can't put this genie back in the bottle...

By the way, I'm not a fixed income guy, but those seem like wide spreads to UST's. Some of the industrial names borrow for a lot less, yea?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:17 | Link to Comment Bob
Bob's picture

The MSM is getting all over this mess.  The bloggers who put on the heat should get some serious credit one day.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:37 | Link to Comment Nine Pies
Nine Pies's picture

No wand for the Feds to wave?  Damn!  Here comes the Federal Uniform Foreclosure Act.  Sounds like they are already laying the groundwork with scare stories about everyone's title being cloudy.

Fri, 10/15/2010 - 00:28 | Link to Comment tallystick
tallystick's picture

Everyones titles will only be clouded if scaMERS is allowed to persist.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:00 | Link to Comment 1100-TACTICAL-12
1100-TACTICAL-12's picture

Nothing good for anyone, will come from this clusterfuck...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 18:11 | Link to Comment puckles
puckles's picture

On the contrary, Federal RICO statutes and other conspiracy-related statutes would do just fine here.  And don't toss out the Interstate Commerce Clause--it has been used, and misused, of late, for so many evil purposes (e.g., Obamacare), that finally a proper use would provide some well-deserved relief on the part of the public, and reassure them that the rule of law has not been utterly abandoned in this country, yet.

Of course, there is still the lame duck session of Congress...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:15 | Link to Comment TraderTimm
TraderTimm's picture

"Bear Stearns is fine!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUkbdjetlY8

Yeah, we've seen this before.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:15 | Link to Comment EscapeKey
EscapeKey's picture

Oh ok, why don't I give Dimon some money he can pay himself in bonus in a few days time? What could possibly go wrong?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:15 | Link to Comment Sophist Economicus
Sophist Economicus's picture

"Who's got the Smallest TIPS"?

 

That's easy, Jamie Lee Curtis...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:17 | Link to Comment LeBalance
LeBalance's picture

He who suffer from crack spread, ....

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:18 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

Seems like they just need to raise a little cash for year-end bonuses and a bigger Holiday Extravaganza.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:20 | Link to Comment AccreditedEYE
AccreditedEYE's picture

Hey Harry, are you buying this dip in SIZE???

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:24 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

Nope. Hanging on to my metals and watching AAPL closely. IMO, it needs to turn for the market to really take a shit. Ready to push a short on it once it starts breaking down. It will - just some patience required.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:27 | Link to Comment Clark_Griswold ...
Clark_Griswold Hedge Mnger's picture

yeah but we still have a little pomo pumping to do tomorrow and Monday...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:30 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

Yep. Better known as QE2.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:32 | Link to Comment Dagny Taggart
Dagny Taggart's picture

I think we're up to POMO 1.3, not QE2 'til Ben says so. Tyler?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:34 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

I'm really beginning to think POMO is QE2 and it will continue for quite some time. Kind of goes on in the background without upsetting anyone. Covert easing, you might say.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:43 | Link to Comment sweet ebony diamond
sweet ebony diamond's picture

Your truthiness factor is high today. What's up with that?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:48 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

Fear can do that to me sometimes.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:54 | Link to Comment traderjoe
traderjoe's picture

Agreed. Frustrates me that any upcoming QE isn't called QE3. Just like how the Bush stimulus checks aren't counted in the stimulus numerology...

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:14 | Link to Comment barliman
barliman's picture

 

QE2=(TBTF loss exposure)N+1 where N=Helicopter Ben's Printing Presses (Sorry, supersript for N+1 is not working)

The Fed reversed the plan to deleverage its balance sheet of MBS in late July/early August. Do any of the regular ZH readers believe that wasn't a function of foreknowledge of the foreclosure crimes now coming to light?

A hint for the newb's, your county recorder's office is located somewhere within driving distance of you. It's difficult (but not impossible) to control this at a national level when the tens of thousands of transactional locations for all real estate are so close to the 100,000,000 plus households affected by these MBS.

Barliman

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 18:50 | Link to Comment TraderTimm
TraderTimm's picture

Bernanke.Loop(){

     do while(Unemployment.Current > Unemployment.Prev && Helicopter.Fuel == "Full") {

     Pump.The.Equities++; Curve.Flattener++; Silently.Panic.About.Gold++;

     Collect.Massive.Paycheck * 10^100; Everything.Fine.Index == "MAXIMUM DENIABILITY";

     }

}

 

 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:19 | Link to Comment curbyourrisk
curbyourrisk's picture

How much of theat masive cash trove is over seas???  They can;t really touch that money without payuing HUGE taxes on it..... 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:41 | Link to Comment Commander Cody
Commander Cody's picture

That's why they are borrowing?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:30 | Link to Comment centerline
centerline's picture

Good memory.  I seem to have one or two synapses that are trying desperately to reconnect on this... something in my memory somewhere about this subject... borrowing at specific times versus pulling from offshore due to taxation.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:21 | Link to Comment T Rex
T Rex's picture

And that was the good bank.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:22 | Link to Comment chet
chet's picture

Don't all these banks have a bozillion dollars in "excess reserves"?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:31 | Link to Comment Cdad
Cdad's picture

Yes and no.  Yes on reserves...no on bozillions.  Since their reserves are measured in collapsing dollars and rotting houses, it is more like on tenth of a gajillion.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:25 | Link to Comment treemagnet
treemagnet's picture

The perfect storm.....

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:28 | Link to Comment sethco
sethco's picture

here comes the end of the horrible day, no big deal, Financials ramp. A little one at least. Something to build on for tomorrow.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:33 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

Something for the talking heads to tell us how great the price action was and the obligatory "people want into this market for fear of missing the run, blah, blah, blah".

Same dialogue, different day.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:09 | Link to Comment sethco
sethco's picture

Sure enough. The DOW almost went green right at the close. Fucking 3:30 ramp job. We'll see how things get cooked up overnight...

Fri, 10/15/2010 - 00:56 | Link to Comment Minion
Minion's picture

Closed below the 10 day EMA with huge volume.  I'm stalking it short......

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:34 | Link to Comment A_MacLaren
A_MacLaren's picture

Debt Mongers never seem to get enough Debt.

Jamie sayz: "Get us some more Leverage..."

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:36 | Link to Comment gwar5
gwar5's picture

Is there a run on the banks yet?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:40 | Link to Comment Leo Kolivakis
Leo Kolivakis's picture

Here comes the end of day ramp job...Robots are busy...RISK ON!!!!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:48 | Link to Comment HarryWanger
HarryWanger's picture

When do we hear the obligatory "finished well of its low" spin?

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:52 | Link to Comment shushup
shushup's picture

4 POMOs in the next 6 days - Ramp for sure!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:48 | Link to Comment buzzsaw99
Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:48 | Link to Comment cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

No problemo, Mark to Millardmark accounting in full force.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:51 | Link to Comment shushup
shushup's picture

I remember why the market is rallying now at the end of the day. POMOs are coming-2 in a row Friday and Monday and then also Wednesay and Friday again.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:51 | Link to Comment BT310
BT310's picture

Not to worry. FASB is currently working on amending the balance sheet definitions of capital.  A surprising change is the ability for a firm to claim world landmarks and fictitious entities as assets. Wells Fargo can properly value their stake in the planet Krypton for $86.5 billion. JP Morgan's non-voting shares in Wonka Industries will have an approximate value of $54 billion.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:28 | Link to Comment MichaelG
MichaelG's picture

And whilst the meso-American City of Gold is going through (disputed) fauxclosure precedings, we can of course 3D-print as many unicorns as it takes to restore employment levels to an entirely acceptable <1% of the available workforce.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 15:55 | Link to Comment George Costanza
George Costanza's picture

bogus fraudulent accounting is eventually exposed by CASH FLOW falling shorts.    Lousy business models eventually run out of money, and have to "raise capital", and in this case it is covering shortfalls and not for productive investment.    Burning cash, yet very profitable, what a joke.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:01 | Link to Comment Sudden Debt
Sudden Debt's picture

A few months ago I bought puts on GS and JPM.

They died and went to trash. I couldn't sell them anymore.

Today, it's like they all woke up again! :) 

ALIVE!!!! THEY ARE ALIVE!!!!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:25 | Link to Comment MichaelG
MichaelG's picture

Give it 6mo and everyone who was trying to short the UST 'bubble' will be having a similar experience.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:01 | Link to Comment threefingerscam
threefingerscam's picture

*`WE WISH WE HADN'T DONE' <diddled our NPL provisions> AS ECONOMY FADED: JPM CEO DIMON

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:03 | Link to Comment qikbucks
qikbucks's picture

July 14th...

Let them eat cake... 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:04 | Link to Comment pitz
pitz's picture

Why the hell are them retards doing more borrowing when they could simply pull that money out of the bonus pool?

The 'talent' is not going to leave (and even if they did, this would cut down on severance costs!).

 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:20 | Link to Comment MichaelG
MichaelG's picture

That's some sacrilege, right there.  Ixnay on the onuspoolbay!  A black helicopter will see you shortly.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:22 | Link to Comment Bob
Bob's picture

This is the ELEPHANT in the room. 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:07 | Link to Comment Bruno the Bear
Bruno the Bear's picture

J.P. Morgan new 10-years breaking wider. Very bad sign. +184 right now vs. +180 as priced.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 16:21 | Link to Comment bullwhip29
bullwhip29's picture

Not to worry. With GOOG up $50 and S&P taking out 1200 (while we get yet another bitch of a short squeeze), this story will get shoved to the backburner pretty quickly.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 17:29 | Link to Comment Bullionaire
Bullionaire's picture

It's not just ForclosureGate losses which are vexing JPM:

 

UPDATE:

Rumors persist that the JP Morgan Queen of Silver Derivatives, Blythe Masters, is in high stress mode because her commodity book is blowing up.

Wouldn't you be a little stressed if your 150M oz COMEX silver short position had lost over $900M in 60 days on a mark-to-market basis?! Mind you, this is ONLY their COMEX short and not all the other silver derivatives that I'm sure they call legitimate hedges.

But it sure is fun to think about how they plan to close these out these COMEX shorts as we approach the 6 month position limit implementation deadline.

Bix Weir
More updates at www.RoadtoRoota.com

PS - Bart Chilton has gone silent on me. My take, the CFTC is going to wait for the silver (and gold) rockets to take off before they put the hammer down on JPM.

Fri, 10/15/2010 - 09:52 | Link to Comment darkaeye
darkaeye's picture

True dat Bull!  I've been looking around corners for Bart the Surfer-dude myself.  We know he's out there somewhere, and with JP Migraine continuing their now illegal proprietary trading in the big fix, he's gotta have something up his sleeve.

I keep seeing the scene in the Untouchables where the judge reluctantly switches juries with the courtroom next door.

Go Bart!!  Show us your 21st Century Elliot Ness-ness. 

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 18:02 | Link to Comment tallystick
tallystick's picture

Hi Jamie, can you let me know which MBS my MORTGAGE DEED is in? It's ok if you don't have the paper I issued. If you don't have my paper, I'll just write checks to you and photograph them, digitize into proprietary format deposit them into my private electronic database CAPX under your name. Check the latest Basel guidelines, you can mark it as Tier 1 capital!

Love,

Tally

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 18:32 | Link to Comment Robslob
Robslob's picture

Deep thoughts:
1) QE 2.0 will kill JP Morgan shorts on silver
2) The banks who were rushing foreclosure to take advantage speculative capital coming from QE 2.0 in hopes of selling repo housing?
3) Could this delay QE2.0
4) Fed announces Nov 3rd that they just completed QE 2.0...surprise!
5) Market Crashes
6) Market Crashes
7) Market Crashes

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 19:52 | Link to Comment theprofromdover
theprofromdover's picture

Perhaps this is just an insurance policy by Silver-Jamie in case it all gets too tight for JPM.

By the time they have to fold, the money will have been syphoned out & be long gone..

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 19:58 | Link to Comment Triggernometry
Triggernometry's picture

Agreed.  This has been building for some time, but I will promptly removed what marginal dollar assets I keep from Chase.

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 23:06 | Link to Comment Bartanist
Bartanist's picture

More massive irony. Where will the billions come from? No one has $4 billion just sitting around waiting for JPMorgan to need money. So, where will the money come from? Some Rothschild bank connected to the Fed will create the money out of thin air and lend it to JPMorgan and the incest of toilet paper credit money will continue ... and no one can figure out that all of the banks just finance each other with money created out of thin air.

This is one sick f'n financial empire ... waiting for someone to take it outof our misery!

Thu, 10/14/2010 - 23:17 | Link to Comment onlooker
onlooker's picture

 Reply to Post::::::

 
 
by Dagny Taggart
on Thu, 10/14/2010 - 14:14
#650231

Oh, no! JPM got a margin call on those silver shorts, too? Gotta cover 'em at some point, boys.

REPLY---------------------- WOW! so silver may get more upward fuel with the JPM cover? Can the Fed somehow cover for JPM and drive silver down??

Tue, 11/16/2010 - 10:34 | Link to Comment daniel
daniel's picture

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