Housekeeping - We Are Back

Tyler Durden's picture

Update: ok, the 10,000 people that just hit the server didn't help.

We apologize for the extended downtime. European server hosts responsible for the crash will be promptly punished when their sovereign CDS shortly catch up with BP's defaults risk (+108 now to 368bps, 27% implied default probability for 5 Y). We are comforted by the fact that Ben Bernanke sees no future crash for Zero Hedge servers, ever again.

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Cookie's picture

Thank God you are back ZH...been going through major cold turkey for the past few hours...thought the Feds had got ya!

macfly's picture

ditto that - especially as I'd ben reading some of the sinister .gov stuff on Wikileaks this am!

pigpen's picture

Agreed. ZH in bed is the first thing I do in the morning. It was a dark morning to say the least. Glad my compass finally works again as without the ZH gang I am truly lost.


Montecarlo's picture

Now I know how a drowning person feels when they can't reach air - and thank you for the easy CAPTCHA!

homersimpson's picture

Welcome back. In your absence, SKYNET has jacked up the DJI over the 10k mark on a low volume day. You didn't miss much.

Cheeky Bastard's picture

Fucking Europeans.


nopat's picture

Correction: Gypsies, er... Roma...probably tried to use one of the server's powercords to tie their caravan to the back of a clapped-out Ford Orion.

Cheeky Bastard's picture

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA; but what you are talking about are Pikeys [specific only to the UK. Ireland and Wales ], not Roma.

Attitude_Check's picture

Have you noticed ROMA in London, now that Romania is part of the EU?  I have, shortly after being in Romania, and nearly getting my head kicked in an robbed at an ATM.  Despite my generally cautious nature he ALMOST GOT ME.


NOW I know why the eastern Europeans dislike the ROMA so mucy, and the West will shortly!

valachus's picture

Proper name for Gipsies is.. well, Gipsies. "Roma", or as a matter of fact, "Rroma" is a Newspeak denomination given to them by the EU PC doctrinaires post 1990.  

Said denomination is nowhere to be found in dictionaries prior to that period, and the association between "Rroma" and Romania (which caught much flak from the EU on account of its alleged disproportionately large Gipsy prison inmate population during the 90s) is nothing but a (mostly) British press invention.

You westerners demanded that Romania stops "persecuting" Gipsies - well, you can now enjoy their presence and rich cultural traditions to the fullest.

Reductio ad Absurdum's picture

Don't blame me. No one ever asked me if I wanted mexicans, gypsies, mohammedans, whatever in my ancestral homeland. There are still some sane people in the western world, but our numbers go down every day it seems, ever since the end of WWII.

nopat's picture

Gonna put my WASP ascott on and quote a punchline: iceberg, Greenberg, what's the difference?  But for the sake of accuracy, you're right.

Running on Empty's picture

Now I know what a crack addict feels like.

CoopDeluxe's picture

I picked a bad week to quit sniffing airplane glue.

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Try the natural high you just got when ZH finally reappeared. Suck on those Endorphins baby. :>)

Cheeky Bastard's picture

+1000000 ..

I almost started using heroin again just to shift my addiction ....

Hungry For Knowledge's picture

Damn this addiction to ZH.  I am hating myself all morning as I clicked over again......and again......and again.....

RockyRacoon's picture

No problem!  I knew that if I was not on line neither were any of you folks.  Gave me a chance to get some things done, like eat and take a shower.  I feel much better (and smell better too).

Cognitive Dissonance's picture

We are all relieved you were able to shower. :>)

RockyRacoon's picture

Ah, the powers of the Internets!

velobabe's picture

drop the a l m o s t, for me.

have it right†


glad i had another alternative site already established to scream, moan and groan.

N A T E, baby thanks†

Minyan Vince's picture

now you see, I thought I was the only one that got the shakes upon seeing a no-load of ZH...whew, glad's that over

spartan117's picture

I thought it was a DNS attack by the squid or the BBC (Bernanke's Boys C.ub).  Gold getting smashed at the same time.  This is all just a coincidence, of course. 

Segestan's picture

Welcome Back... this site is the Best .

carbonmutant's picture

Well after going through TDA's chartout an hour before closing yesterday I naturally thought... well nevermind that. It's good to see you back.

cowdiddly's picture

After watching stocks jump back over Dow 10000 on nothing more than a dry Benarke popcorn fart, my first thought was conspiracy, server attack at Zero Hedge to blind the last bastion of truth. LOL

Inspector Asset's picture

I will say the whole incident sparked a couple fresh ideas.

1. How about we organize all the ZHers, including their friends, to ping the Goldman servers all at the exact time, lets say 911am every friday. Maybe even click on a specific link on the site, all at the same time, just to see what would happen.


2. Organize a "Snitch-Tip Jar.  All of ZHers could donate money to pay off important key snitches to come forward and save their ass, even if its just for the finacial reward. That ought to get witch hunt started.

bada boom's picture

Thanks.  Luckily I went to your twitter account and found out what was going on.

I was able to play game of tic-tac-toe on my computer and was able reverse the defcon level to 3.

johngaltfla's picture

I was worried you had been Goldman HACKed.....

williambanzai7's picture

You mean you were not ransacked by Goldman interns?

Wynn's picture

Perhaps you should set up back up servers on Mars, this planet is becoming very unstable.

carbonmutant's picture

 Data Center in Geosynchronous orbit.

bada boom's picture

And by the way, I can't believe how much work I got done when your site was down.

WaterWings's picture

I thought I was banned. Went over to HuffPo. Dog to its vomit. Thank you, thank you for being alive ZH!

Cpl Hicks's picture

Well, if Ben B. says your good to go then I guess I should take you off my Favorites list; you're're well and truly fucked.

MyFriendMises's picture

Whew!!! I had the withdrawal sweats.

London Dude Trader's picture


Leo Kolivakis's picture

Welcome back! A day without ZH is simply dull as hell!

monmick's picture

Hey Tyler,

Are you also looking for an ass to kick?

LMAO's picture

"Update: ok, the 10,000 people that just hit the server didn't help"


Nah, that was me trying to gain entrance about 9,999 times....Wonder who the other one was?



woolly mammoth's picture

Guns, ammo, pm's, food, tp, Zero Hedge. That's all that's needed.

Contura's picture

Jesus, i got really nervous ZH disappeared. Addict. And i live in Norway.

Trifecta Man's picture

How do we know you're the real zero hedge?

breezer1's picture

when i realized that this was not business as usual i went to my secure panic room. now i find out it was all a joke. i want all my money back. you can send it to my zurich account asap. in gold.

jkruffin's picture

Nice to see the site back up.  Anyone catching the lying Admiral regarding the oil leak? Claiming they are catching 15k barrels a day.  ROFLMAO   If that was the case, then 100k barrels a day are still pouring into the Gulf, and BP has been lying the whole time.


KTV Escort's picture

Lying. The non-event H1N1 scare was just a diversion for the CORRUPTION virus that had been spreading world wide among the ruling elite... related symptoms: lack of integrity, lack of courage, lack of common sense, lack of accountability and lack of compassion.

sumo's picture

It is just not the same without Zero Hedge. Welcome back.

Chicago bear's picture

First I thought it was my phone, then the wifi, then the feds, then CNBC hackers. I was down. I needed my fix.  I felt like Tiger after the shtf. No more fix! Glad you are back. I can get my fix again.

firstdivision's picture

Yay!  That void in my life that was supposed to be filled with wife and kids just got filled again with Zero Hedge.  I was afraid I was going to have to get married for a second there.  Please do not scare me like that again.