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Housekeeping - We Are Back

Tyler Durden's picture




 

Update: ok, the 10,000 people that just hit the server didn't help.

We apologize for the extended downtime. European server hosts responsible for the crash will be promptly punished when their sovereign CDS shortly catch up with BP's defaults risk (+108 now to 368bps, 27% implied default probability for 5 Y). We are comforted by the fact that Ben Bernanke sees no future crash for Zero Hedge servers, ever again.

 

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Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:27 | 403369 Cookie
Cookie's picture

Thank God you are back ZH...been going through major cold turkey for the past few hours...thought the Feds had got ya!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:04 | 403402 macfly
macfly's picture

ditto that - especially as I'd ben reading some of the sinister .gov stuff on Wikileaks this am!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:17 | 403432 pigpen
pigpen's picture

Agreed. ZH in bed is the first thing I do in the morning. It was a dark morning to say the least. Glad my compass finally works again as without the ZH gang I am truly lost.

 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:25 | 403462 Montecarlo
Montecarlo's picture

Now I know how a drowning person feels when they can't reach air - and thank you for the easy CAPTCHA!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:27 | 403370 homersimpson
homersimpson's picture

Welcome back. In your absence, SKYNET has jacked up the DJI over the 10k mark on a low volume day. You didn't miss much.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:28 | 403371 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

Fucking Europeans.

 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:14 | 403422 nopat
nopat's picture

Correction: Gypsies, er... Roma...probably tried to use one of the server's powercords to tie their caravan to the back of a clapped-out Ford Orion.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:23 | 403454 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA; but what you are talking about are Pikeys [specific only to the UK. Ireland and Wales ], not Roma.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:35 | 403499 Attitude_Check
Attitude_Check's picture

Have you noticed ROMA in London, now that Romania is part of the EU?  I have, shortly after being in Romania, and nearly getting my head kicked in an robbed at an ATM.  Despite my generally cautious nature he ALMOST GOT ME.

 

NOW I know why the eastern Europeans dislike the ROMA so mucy, and the West will shortly!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:22 | 403630 valachus
valachus's picture

Proper name for Gipsies is.. well, Gipsies. "Roma", or as a matter of fact, "Rroma" is a Newspeak denomination given to them by the EU PC doctrinaires post 1990.  

Said denomination is nowhere to be found in dictionaries prior to that period, and the association between "Rroma" and Romania (which caught much flak from the EU on account of its alleged disproportionately large Gipsy prison inmate population during the 90s) is nothing but a (mostly) British press invention.

You westerners demanded that Romania stops "persecuting" Gipsies - well, you can now enjoy their presence and rich cultural traditions to the fullest.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:44 | 403702 Reductio ad Absurdum
Reductio ad Absurdum's picture

Don't blame me. No one ever asked me if I wanted mexicans, gypsies, mohammedans, whatever in my ancestral homeland. There are still some sane people in the western world, but our numbers go down every day it seems, ever since the end of WWII.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 16:34 | 404328 nopat
nopat's picture

Gonna put my WASP ascott on and quote a punchline: iceberg, Greenberg, what's the difference?  But for the sake of accuracy, you're right.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:28 | 403372 Running on Empty
Running on Empty's picture

Now I know what a crack addict feels like.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:32 | 403382 CoopDeluxe
CoopDeluxe's picture

I picked a bad week to quit sniffing airplane glue.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:57 | 403395 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

Try the natural high you just got when ZH finally reappeared. Suck on those Endorphins baby. :>)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Endorphin

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:32 | 403383 Cheeky Bastard
Cheeky Bastard's picture

+1000000 ..

I almost started using heroin again just to shift my addiction ....

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:03 | 403398 Hungry For Knowledge
Hungry For Knowledge's picture

Damn this addiction to ZH.  I am hating myself all morning as I clicked over again......and again......and again.....

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:14 | 403428 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

No problem!  I knew that if I was not on line neither were any of you folks.  Gave me a chance to get some things done, like eat and take a shower.  I feel much better (and smell better too).

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:06 | 403584 Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive Dissonance's picture

We are all relieved you were able to shower. :>)

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 16:31 | 404318 RockyRacoon
RockyRacoon's picture

Ah, the powers of the Internets!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:29 | 403447 velobabe
velobabe's picture

drop the a l m o s t, for me.

have it right†

 

glad i had another alternative site already established to scream, moan and groan.

N A T E, baby thanks†

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:22 | 403451 Minyan Vince
Minyan Vince's picture

now you see, I thought I was the only one that got the shakes upon seeing a no-load of ZH...whew, glad's that over

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:29 | 403373 spartan117
spartan117's picture

I thought it was a DNS attack by the squid or the BBC (Bernanke's Boys C.ub).  Gold getting smashed at the same time.  This is all just a coincidence, of course. 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:30 | 403374 Segestan
Segestan's picture

Welcome Back... this site is the Best .

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:31 | 403376 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

Well after going through TDA's chartout an hour before closing yesterday I naturally thought... well nevermind that. It's good to see you back.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:32 | 403377 cowdiddly
cowdiddly's picture

After watching stocks jump back over Dow 10000 on nothing more than a dry Benarke popcorn fart, my first thought was conspiracy, server attack at Zero Hedge to blind the last bastion of truth. LOL

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:23 | 403637 Inspector Asset
Inspector Asset's picture

I will say the whole incident sparked a couple fresh ideas.

1. How about we organize all the ZHers, including their friends, to ping the Goldman servers all at the exact time, lets say 911am every friday. Maybe even click on a specific link on the site, all at the same time, just to see what would happen.

 

2. Organize a "Snitch-Tip Jar.  All of ZHers could donate money to pay off important key snitches to come forward and save their ass, even if its just for the finacial reward. That ought to get witch hunt started.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:31 | 403378 bada boom
bada boom's picture

Thanks.  Luckily I went to your twitter account and found out what was going on.

I was able to play game of tic-tac-toe on my computer and was able reverse the defcon level to 3.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:31 | 403379 johngaltfla
johngaltfla's picture

I was worried you had been Goldman HACKed.....

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:31 | 403380 williambanzai7
williambanzai7's picture

You mean you were not ransacked by Goldman interns?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:31 | 403381 Wynn
Wynn's picture

Perhaps you should set up back up servers on Mars, this planet is becoming very unstable.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:57 | 403569 carbonmutant
carbonmutant's picture

 Data Center in Geosynchronous orbit.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:33 | 403385 bada boom
bada boom's picture

And by the way, I can't believe how much work I got done when your site was down.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:54 | 403392 theopco
theopco's picture

lol

 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:56 | 403745 WaterWings
WaterWings's picture

I thought I was banned. Went over to HuffPo. Dog to its vomit. Thank you, thank you for being alive ZH!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:34 | 403387 Cpl Hicks
Cpl Hicks's picture

Well, if Ben B. says your good to go then I guess I should take you off my Favorites list; you're toast...you're well and truly fucked.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:35 | 403388 MyFriendMises
MyFriendMises's picture

Whew!!! I had the withdrawal sweats.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:35 | 403390 London Dude Trader
London Dude Trader's picture

WELCOME BACK! WE WERE STARTING TO GET WORRIED OVER HERE IN LONDON!!!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:54 | 403391 Leo Kolivakis
Leo Kolivakis's picture

Welcome back! A day without ZH is simply dull as hell!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 11:55 | 403393 monmick
monmick's picture

Hey Tyler,

Are you also looking for an ass to kick?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:01 | 403396 LMAO
LMAO's picture

"Update: ok, the 10,000 people that just hit the server didn't help"

 

Nah, that was me trying to gain entrance about 9,999 times....Wonder who the other one was?

 

LMAO

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:01 | 403397 woolly mammoth
woolly mammoth's picture

Guns, ammo, pm's, food, tp, Zero Hedge. That's all that's needed.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:04 | 403400 Contura
Contura's picture

Jesus, i got really nervous ZH disappeared. Addict. And i live in Norway.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:04 | 403401 Trifecta Man
Trifecta Man's picture

How do we know you're the real zero hedge?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:41 | 403518 breezer1
breezer1's picture

when i realized that this was not business as usual i went to my secure panic room. now i find out it was all a joke. i want all my money back. you can send it to my zurich account asap. in gold.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:05 | 403406 jkruffin
jkruffin's picture

Nice to see the site back up.  Anyone catching the lying Admiral regarding the oil leak? Claiming they are catching 15k barrels a day.  ROFLMAO   If that was the case, then 100k barrels a day are still pouring into the Gulf, and BP has been lying the whole time.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_oil_spill_administration#mwpphu-post-form

 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:46 | 403680 KTV Escort
KTV Escort's picture

Lying. The non-event H1N1 scare was just a diversion for the CORRUPTION virus that had been spreading world wide among the ruling elite... related symptoms: lack of integrity, lack of courage, lack of common sense, lack of accountability and lack of compassion.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:06 | 403410 sumo
sumo's picture

It is just not the same without Zero Hedge. Welcome back.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:06 | 403411 Chicago bear
Chicago bear's picture

First I thought it was my phone, then the wifi, then the feds, then CNBC hackers. I was down. I needed my fix.  I felt like Tiger after the shtf. No more fix! Glad you are back. I can get my fix again.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:09 | 403413 firstdivision
firstdivision's picture

Yay!  That void in my life that was supposed to be filled with wife and kids just got filled again with Zero Hedge.  I was afraid I was going to have to get married for a second there.  Please do not scare me like that again.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:14 | 403420 A_MacLaren
A_MacLaren's picture

Some day this war is going to end.

The markets will crater.  The internet will be taken down.

ZH will exist only on Shortwave SSB radio.

And we will need the Gold, Guns, Generators, Grub, Gasoline, Silver, Seeds, Stoves, Shells (ammo), Family, Friends, Food, Fuel, Fertilizer and Farmland.

But today is not that day.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:14 | 403426 nonclaim
nonclaim's picture

Well, you need plans ready to move or distribute your servers again. Europe was safe after poking the USA with a short stick (from blogspot). Now the stick got too short again.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:15 | 403429 merehuman
merehuman's picture

Thank you ZEROHEDGE .  My home away from home, the one place like minds can meet.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:20 | 403444 Duuude
Duuude's picture

 

Kept checkin Finviz ta see if ya got BB'd.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:18 | 403437 glenlloyd
glenlloyd's picture

OMG I was starting to wrap myself in tinfoil. Thank goodness that's over.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:22 | 403453 Mitchman
Mitchman's picture

What did you do with my $25?  :-)

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:25 | 403463 bugs_
bugs_'s picture

Another thanks.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:27 | 403474 assumptionblindness
assumptionblindness's picture

A day without ZH just ain't worth havin'.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:28 | 403477 Jim in MN
Jim in MN's picture

Come ON, can't you just print more servers?  And while you're at it, print me up a flying talking scented purple pony too, K? K.

Printing more solves ANYTHING

(Stares at ink stained hands.....) Out, damn'd spot!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:32 | 403488 oklaboy
oklaboy's picture

Obamo kickin yer ass?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:35 | 403496 huggy_in_london
huggy_in_london's picture

Shit ... i thought that they had come in the night for you.....

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:35 | 403498 Leo Kolivakis
Leo Kolivakis's picture

LOL, did anyone else wonder if the government shut down ZH?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:39 | 403509 SRV - ES339
SRV - ES339's picture

... and I'm sure all you "addicts" have made your ZH donations, right?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:36 | 403882 SRV - ES339
SRV - ES339's picture

Your wallet... open it!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:39 | 403510 bada boom
bada boom's picture

Just saw this headline from CNNmoney,

"Stocks surge on Bernanke's optimism"

Perhaps it should be,

"Stocks surge on Zerohedge Site being down"

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:31 | 403657 thesapein
thesapein's picture

+1

totally living up to your name

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:37 | 403678 Mesquite
Mesquite's picture

It was me...I threw in the towel on a losing TNA position yesterday @ 1:58p--then it all started turning around...Happens all the time..Spooky..(I know, that's crazy, but it does happen all too often..Un-fkn-explainable..)

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 17:21 | 404449 Cui Bono
Cui Bono's picture

Now I ain't 'xactly one of them fancy big city fatcats but I'm pretty sure there is no such thing as "a losing TNA position".  Y'all's making that shit up!  Cb

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 15:20 | 404052 bada boom
bada boom's picture

Sorry, new headline,

"Stocks crash on Zerohedge's Return"

I don't think the Bernanke optimism is working anymore.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:42 | 403525 JR
JR's picture

Zero Hedge down… all that while… and still I couldn’t bring myself to visit Bloomberg for fear of disinformation contamination without a ZH cure.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:59 | 403753 WaterWings
WaterWings's picture

+1

Even with our "jaded" perspective it's hard to see through all the 'ganda.

ZH: The Antidote.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:47 | 403537 Whats that smell
Whats that smell's picture

Marla in the cave is awesome

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:49 | 403546 bingaling
bingaling's picture

I got a little nervous thought you guys got taken down or worse you sold your domain name . By the way it is worth between 200k-450k according to estimates on the web .

I also saw you won the first amendment award . Digging a little deeper into google I tried to find out who Tyler Durden really is . My 2 best guesses after searching I came up with was Bob Marley ( he never really died you know) or Martin Armstrong.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 12:58 | 403572 Heavy
Heavy's picture

Thank you admins for the work you put in.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:08 | 403589 Inspector Asset
Inspector Asset's picture

I thought maybe the feds rounded all you renegades up in one international sting. 

Since truth is what is popular on this site, Tyler Durden must be on the FBI terrorist watch list by now.

I am glad to see it's buz as usual.  If it wasn't for ZH I would have to reason to be on the net, except to check email, and and occasional glance at www.infowars.com .

 

I often wonder why the gov lets sites like Infowars.com operate?  Maybe to have a nice list of suspects to round up if anything goes counter to plan.  Or maybe they are just so close to the endgaME FINISH Line, they could give a rats ass what the people know.

I wonder if Alex Jones has switched sides, and if Tyler will be faced with a similar decision, it's only a fucntion of his success and time.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:10 | 403594 Contura
Contura's picture

Paying my deuce.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:31 | 403661 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

The directors of the firm hired to continue the website after the other
people had been sacked, wish it to be known that they have just been
sacked.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:35 | 403668 boricuadigm-shift
boricuadigm-shift's picture

I thought my company filtered a secret unfiltered proxy.  Awesome to be back.  Missed ZH from Puerto Rico.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:34 | 403670 contrabandista13
contrabandista13's picture

"... Ben Bernanke sees no future crash for Zero Hedge servers, ever again...."

 

Where do the Zero Hedge servers trade...?  I think I would like to go short and fade Ben.... 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:35 | 403671 Inspector Asset
Inspector Asset's picture

Off topic, but I want feed back.  Found a story today, mounting evidence that, the spill is a false terror attack, with many motives.

My knowledge starts and stops with finance. Would like some feed back on this article. http://www.infowars.com/evidence-points-to-bp-oil-spill-false-flag/

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:52 | 403727 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

...I would go there if it would let me on...

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:07 | 403777 mtomato2
mtomato2's picture

Meh.

Maybe, maybe not.  Most likely not. Alex loses most of his credibility with me when I read the bloggers at the end of his articles.  You learn a lot about a blog from its bloggers. 

S'why I like Zero so much.

Let us not forget, Dude, (let us NOT forget...) sometimes stuff just happens.  Ever since the fall of man, things have been tough all over.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 15:05 | 404001 Mesquite
Mesquite's picture

Before we sweep this under the rug...find it curious why all that stock just happened to be sold just before the incident..just curious..

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 13:36 | 403675 DoomsDay
DoomsDay's picture

Agreed with everyone, absolutely awful morning in Canada with no ZH!

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:19 | 403829 Double down
Double down's picture

Tyler!

I almost died!  Next time, put up Marla in here cave.  It soothes.  

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:29 | 403865 Joe Shmoe
Joe Shmoe's picture

Funny as hell posts here!  I was also one of those who assumed the ZH veil had been pierced and CIA storm troopers were breaking down doors.

But then, if/when that does happen, how can we all know where to go next?  Kind of like when I take my kids to the zoo and tell them to meet me at giraffe if they get lost?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:42 | 403909 sheeple
sheeple's picture

10,000 people that just hit the server

 

Congrat!!!!

 

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:44 | 403919 elmechanic
elmechanic's picture

I missed my fix!

Glad to have you back sir.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:45 | 403921 russki standart
russki standart's picture

Ai Caramba, I am so glad you guys are back. I was spending too much time surfing youporn.com.

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 14:45 | 403923 thegr8whorebabylon
thegr8whorebabylon's picture

yes, we need a contigency plan.  cheeky?

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 15:04 | 403994 bingaling
bingaling's picture

well for all of us ZH addicts tyler could set up a telephone number - with an automated messages saying -the following :

1- Please excuse us, ZH is doing routine maintenance

2- Please excuse us ZH is currently having to delete its hardrives and shred all paper as the PTB crash down our door . Please call back for further updates

3- Please excuse us ,the ZH site is under cyber attack by govt hackers please go to our mirror site at Ucantstopus.com

4-ZH is now mainstream but still reports it like it is at our new TV station -no commercials just your daily fix .

Wed, 06/09/2010 - 15:54 | 404181 Uncle Remus
Uncle Remus's picture

Over here, we just said, aye, great time to go to the range and put a few rounds into something. So we did, now we're back and lo, so is ZH.

Thu, 06/10/2010 - 00:45 | 405267 Hdawg
Hdawg's picture

think of a new server, double it and add 2 zeros

Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!